YAGT: Cheated on....

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PanzerIV

Diamond Member
Dec 19, 2002
6,875
1
0
Originally posted by: CVSiN
Originally posted by: Nik
Originally posted by: brigden
It's cliche as Hell, but time does heal all wounds.

You're going to hurt. It's going to take time. You can either feel sorry for yourself and get depressed during this time, or you can look at it from a positive perspective and know that she wasn't the one and that you will meet another woman and your life will get better.

Go out with your mates, get drunk. Listen to music. Work out. Do whatever you need to do to occupy yourself.

Good luck.

This man speaks the truth. :thumbsup:

Not true :(

10 years now and I'm still hurting from losing my wife of 10 years...
not a day goes by I dont feel it..

there may be alot of fish in the sea.. but most of them are sharks and barracudas... out for $$ not love..

life is a sh!tty vicious circle...

Didn't she die though or am I confusing you with another poster?
 

Doboji

Diamond Member
May 18, 2001
7,912
0
76
Originally posted by: shilala
Originally posted by: Doboji
Cliff Notes
That woman of yours is tiny. Cute, too. :)

Thanx:) :thumbsup: She's a little'un she has been known to kick a little ass from time to time though.

To the OP: I went through a very similiar experience to you 4.5 years ago... now I've met the love of my life and am engaged. You'll be fine... in time.

-Max
 

Miramonti

Lifer
Aug 26, 2000
28,653
100
106
I think its impossible for someone who accepts cheating on their SO to then worry about the unlimited peripheral lies that cover it up. Its like someone who murders then worry about bruising someone...its just never going to happen once the greater crime is accepted.

Sorry about what you're going thru...there's no quick or simple way out of the hurt.
 

pclstyle

Platinum Member
Apr 14, 2004
2,364
0
0
Originally posted by: gigapet
happened to me too. Its an important lesson to learn though...I am glad I did.

The best thing you can do for yourself is go out and bang like ten other girls. You will quickly forget.

Lessons learned:

- 98% of girls will cheat if given the discreet opportunity to do so
- 98% of girls will lie about cheating and anything else that is convienient for them right to your face and not feel bad about it(at least for a while)
-98% of girls will manipulate you as much as you let them and not feel bad about it
-98% of girls will suck the life right out of you if you let them


So the solution is to wait around for the good 2% or learn how to beat the 98% at their own game.

:beer: cheer up

hate to admit it, but... QFT
 

Howard

Lifer
Oct 14, 1999
47,982
11
81
Originally posted by: PanzerIV
Originally posted by: CVSiN
Originally posted by: Nik
Originally posted by: brigden
It's cliche as Hell, but time does heal all wounds.

You're going to hurt. It's going to take time. You can either feel sorry for yourself and get depressed during this time, or you can look at it from a positive perspective and know that she wasn't the one and that you will meet another woman and your life will get better.

Go out with your mates, get drunk. Listen to music. Work out. Do whatever you need to do to occupy yourself.

Good luck.

This man speaks the truth. :thumbsup:

Not true :(

10 years now and I'm still hurting from losing my wife of 10 years...
not a day goes by I dont feel it..

there may be alot of fish in the sea.. but most of them are sharks and barracudas... out for $$ not love..

life is a sh!tty vicious circle...

Didn't she die though or am I confusing you with another poster?
Perknose may be who you're thinking of.
 
Oct 9, 1999
19,632
38
91
time man, it's the only cure. sure other women and booze work, but they are temporary.

time will cure you:beer:
 

Hammer

Lifer
Oct 19, 2001
13,217
1
81
wow, what a depressing thread. stop with the stories! ;)

anyways, no matter how bad you feel now, i guarantee you that you won't think twice about it once you find someone new.
 
Oct 9, 1999
19,632
38
91
Originally posted by: MrChad
:music:
Give me my money back
Give me my money back, you bitch.
Give me my money back
And don't forget
To give me back my black T-shirt
:music:

<3 BFF
 

PanzerIV

Diamond Member
Dec 19, 2002
6,875
1
0
Originally posted by: DP
time man, it's the only cure. sure other women and booze work, but they are temporary.

time will cure you:beer:

'Sup DP. Haven't seen you around in awhile.
 

Merlyn3D

Platinum Member
Sep 15, 2001
2,148
0
0
Originally posted by: Aimster
2 months ago I lost my girlfriend/fiance of almost 3 years.

Just before she ended it with me she told me she wanted to marry me like she always said. I bought her a ring and she accepted it. I bought a place next to her and she was excited about it. I decided to stay here for school because of her. I had a job that I eventually lost at the end because of the drama I had to deal with when she ended it.

We broke up because she was interested in other guys and wanted to experience life.

She's 20.and wanted to know for sure if I was the one.

She said things like:
"I was never in love with you"
"Sometimes I thought about killing myself because I felt stuck with you"
"I was only with you because you were nice to me and I didnt want to hurt you"
"I don't know what love is"
"I don't love you"

Then she tells me how she messed around with some dude who happens to call my cell and tells me "dude let her go she wants to be with me". That asshole.

In the end she came back and I am with her. Guess why she is with me? Because I pay for her school (well I did). She expects me to pay for it next semester or she has no way of going to school. I haven't told her that I'm not going to pay for it. When she was my fiance sure, but now I think not.

So right now I'm not really happy. She's with me because she wants to use me. I haven't seen her in a week. She says she is busy. Why am I still with her? For some ass and that's it. I know the love is gone.

Feel better. Don't be like me and let a bitch ruin your life. I was in your shoes and still am. She was the only friend I had. She was all I had. She left and I was down for a month. Had to Withdrawl from classes and lose my job because she was a bitch. I picked myself back up now, but I know its the hardest thing for you to do but just live life without worrying about some bitch.

how do you get over this? Never contact her again and change your number right now.


nice....fight fire with fire....I like
 
Oct 9, 1999
19,632
38
91
Originally posted by: PanzerIV
Originally posted by: DP
time man, it's the only cure. sure other women and booze work, but they are temporary.

time will cure you:beer:

'Sup DP. Haven't seen you around in awhile.

notta damn thing. actually wishing my gf will break up with me:) i got pulled over by a 4runner full of girls the other day and well... let's just say there are TONS of opportunities for bang bang bang. i do love my gf and that's why i can't just call her and be like, "it's done, bye" and never talk to her again. hearing her cry kind of gets me and i'm usually one cold son of a bitch. we have gotten back together over and over and over and i'm not happy but it was so routine for me, like a drug.

oops, sorry for the thread hi jack, don't mind me:D


:beer: panzer, i was just about to PM you after seeing your light bulb on on my buddy list.

cheers
 

Chrono

Diamond Member
Jan 2, 2001
4,959
0
71
forget her. how can you forget? you can't... not won't. you just have to accept it and slowly get on with your life. enjoy your free time now by yourself and rethink everything through. you're a bachelor now! time to go do things alone or with close friends. you'll live.
 

Kadarin

Lifer
Nov 23, 2001
44,296
16
81
Heh.. A lot of it that gets you is looking back on the whole thing and asking yourself how you could be so stupid as to have not seen or ignored all the signs..

Good luck!
 

tommigsr

Platinum Member
May 8, 2001
2,219
0
71
i was in a similar situation as you were not too long ago. i broke up the 4 year relationship because of my exgf cheating. the only thing you can really do is stay true to yourself and be strong. hang out with buddies, make some new friends, go out on trips to see what is out there. it might be hard in the beginning, but you'll find you'll be a lot happier without her.

tom
 

y2kc

Platinum Member
Sep 2, 2000
2,547
0
76
don't expect this to go away anytime soon. as others have said, only time will heal this and I'm not talking a few months. it's very gradual, when my ex cheated it took years to get to the point where i didn't think about it everyday let alone hurt about it.

maybe i'm a slow healer but even now, 10 years later, divorced and moved on, "the old wound" still bothers me from time to time.

you will never be the same. the choice you must make is to either learn and grow or wallow in self pity. with it being fresh and all feel free to mourn (you are mourning). it's part of the healing process, painful yes but also neccessary.
 

91TTZ

Lifer
Jan 31, 2005
14,374
1
0
Originally posted by: y2kc


maybe i'm a slow healer but even now, 10 years later, divorced and moved on, "the old wound" still bothers me from time to time.

you will never be the same. the choice you must make is to either learn and grow or wallow in self pity. with it being fresh and all feel free to mourn (you are mourning). it's part of the healing process, painful yes but also neccessary.

It shouldn't be that dramatic.
 

RegularK

Senior member
Apr 5, 2004
434
0
0
Paragraphs are your friend.

All kidding aside, it's obvious that this girl was not for you by her blatant disregard for your feelings and for your relationship. Just feel relieved that you found this out before you two got married.

As for her possible change of character, people do change over time (sometimes for the better and sometimes for the worse) and sometimes you're so blinded by "love" that you can't see all of these faults. In any event, you should count this breakup as a blessing because she doesn't seem to value you (or herself for that matter).

I think that's enough rambling for now. Things will get better--as someone else said there are many fish in the sea and that's one barracuda down...

edit: when the time is right, you will feel a lot better if you forgive her. Otherwise, you will have pent up anger and you will never be happy. Now, that doesn't necessarily mean you need to be buddy buddy with her...but it does mean that you can move on with your life.
 

PricklyPete

Lifer
Sep 17, 2002
14,582
162
106
Originally posted by: purbeast0
dude please edit your post to have some kind of formatting. no one is going to read it that way, its too hard on the eyes.

agreed...I stopped a few sentences in.
 

y2kc

Platinum Member
Sep 2, 2000
2,547
0
76
Originally posted by: 91TTZ
Originally posted by: y2kc


maybe i'm a slow healer but even now, 10 years later, divorced and moved on, "the old wound" still bothers me from time to time.

you will never be the same. the choice you must make is to either learn and grow or wallow in self pity. with it being fresh and all feel free to mourn (you are mourning). it's part of the healing process, painful yes but also neccessary.

It shouldn't be that dramatic.


That depends on the person. Some can bounce back from stuff like that, others can't. Cheating is as deep a betrayal as they come. To use the trust someone has for you as a weapon, as a tool to facilitate the action is profound (in my book) which is why the hurt can be devastating.

 

BrokenVisage

Lifer
Jan 29, 2005
24,771
14
81
When she comes crawling back to ya begging for you to take her back, then you can tell her to go to hell and restore some of that dignity she took.
 

CVSiN

Diamond Member
Jul 19, 2004
9,289
1
0
Originally posted by: PanzerIV
Originally posted by: CVSiN
Originally posted by: Nik
Originally posted by: brigden
It's cliche as Hell, but time does heal all wounds.

You're going to hurt. It's going to take time. You can either feel sorry for yourself and get depressed during this time, or you can look at it from a positive perspective and know that she wasn't the one and that you will meet another woman and your life will get better.

Go out with your mates, get drunk. Listen to music. Work out. Do whatever you need to do to occupy yourself.

Good luck.

This man speaks the truth. :thumbsup:

Not true :(

10 years now and I'm still hurting from losing my wife of 10 years...
not a day goes by I dont feel it..

there may be alot of fish in the sea.. but most of them are sharks and barracudas... out for $$ not love..

life is a sh!tty vicious circle...

Didn't she die though or am I confusing you with another poster?

yeh thats me...
but time doesnt heal all wounds when it comes to women and love...
 

91TTZ

Lifer
Jan 31, 2005
14,374
1
0
Originally posted by: y2kc

That depends on the person. Some can bounce back from stuff like that, others can't. Cheating is as deep a betrayal as they come. To use the trust someone has for you as a weapon, as a tool to facilitate the action is profound (in my book) which is why the hurt can be devastating.

I agree, and that's why I've lost faith in humanity. I've found that if you come to expect the worst from human beings, you'll rarely be disappointed.

The last gf I had (before my current one), cheated on me, dumped me for this other dude, then called me from her bf's house a few months later when she was drunk and he was at work. I went over there, banged her in his bed, jizzed on his pillow, then dropped her off at McDonalds's and told her I had to run. That's the last I ever saw from her. I wrote her off like damaged property and that was it.
 

jjones

Lifer
Oct 9, 2001
15,424
2
0
That sucks. Have a :beer: and go get laid, preferably have sex with her sister, mom or best friend. And if she ever wants to get back together, agree at once and then cheat on her in the most humiliating way, preferably with her sister, mom or best friend.

Time heals all wounds but never forget: All women cheat and lie. They are evil and will crush your feelings without the least regard, like you were nothing more than a bug.

Hope that cheers you up. :beer:
 

PingSpike

Lifer
Feb 25, 2004
21,758
603
126
Originally posted by: BrokenVisage
When she comes crawling back to ya begging for you to take her back, then you can tell her to go to hell and restore some of that dignity she took.

Yeah, but fvck her one more time first.
 

91TTZ

Lifer
Jan 31, 2005
14,374
1
0
Originally posted by: PingSpike
Originally posted by: BrokenVisage
When she comes crawling back to ya begging for you to take her back, then you can tell her to go to hell and restore some of that dignity she took.

Yeah, but fvck her one more time first.


2nd. That's what I did.

In fact, don't tell her to go to hell, just keep banging her and leaving her hanging until she gives up. Women aren't the sharpest tools in the shed (they operate off emotions, not logic) and you'll get quite a few bj's before she finally figures out that you're using her.