Worst sexual experience?

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Accipiter22

Banned
Feb 11, 2005
7,942
2
0
ooooooooooooooooooooh how did i forget this?!??!?!? First girl I ever fingered...we're sitting on her couch watching a movie....her parents are in the house.....so i start fingering her...I get one in.....two......I'm daring so I tried 3...and got it in....now I'm going with 3 and as she gets more into it I realize I could get 4 in.....now I'm thinking 'what the fvck this is NOT normal'.......so for about 20 more minutes i've got 4........and then I think you know what happened....five. the whole fist......my first fingering experience and i managed ot cram my whole fist in the girl. She got off twice on it. She was only about 5 3 and maybe 100 lbs.....and I fist rammed her. I felt like I was the one who got violated after that. Driving home that night I pulled over on the side of the road and vomitted.
 
S

Steve

Lifer
May 2, 2004
15,945
11
81
Originally posted by: Accipiter22
ooooooooooooooooooooh how did i forget this?!??!?!? First girl I ever fingered...we're sitting on her couch watching a movie....her parents are in the house.....so i start fingering her...I get one in.....two......I'm daring so I tried 3...and got it in....now I'm going with 3 and as she gets more into it I realize I could get 4 in.....now I'm thinking 'what the fvck this is NOT normal'.......so for about 20 more minutes i've got 4........and then I think you know what happened....five. the whole fist......my first fingering experience and i managed ot cram my whole fist in the girl. She got off twice on it. She was only about 5 3 and maybe 100 lbs.....and I fist rammed her. I felt like I was the one who got violated after that. Driving home that night I pulled over on the side of the road and vomitted.
Click to expand...

That is actually an awesome story.
 
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upsciLLion

Diamond Member
Feb 21, 2001
5,947
1
81
Originally posted by: Accipiter22
ooooooooooooooooooooh how did i forget this?!??!?!? First girl I ever fingered...we're sitting on her couch watching a movie....her parents are in the house.....so i start fingering her...I get one in.....two......I'm daring so I tried 3...and got it in....now I'm going with 3 and as she gets more into it I realize I could get 4 in.....now I'm thinking 'what the fvck this is NOT normal'.......so for about 20 more minutes i've got 4........and then I think you know what happened....five. the whole fist......my first fingering experience and i managed ot cram my whole fist in the girl. She got off twice on it. She was only about 5 3 and maybe 100 lbs.....and I fist rammed her. I felt like I was the one who got violated after that. Driving home that night I pulled over on the side of the road and vomitted.
Click to expand...

roflmao. You have to be joking.
 
T

thirdlegstump

Banned
Feb 12, 2001
8,713
0
0
On my first time we were both totally drunk and played without a condom. I had a boner that just would NOT go down. Eventually 8 hours passed and I could not bear the pain any longer and then she let me slip right in the backside. Just the thought of it broke my nuts in 10 mins or so. We quickly washed up and hit the sac. After about 2 hours of sleep, I had to get up for work and experienced the worst fvckin pain in my life. Basically my dick was burning like sandpaper on sunburn. Called in sick and stayed home for yet another 6 hour fun. Was not exactly fun. True story btw.
 
olds

olds

Elite Member
Mar 3, 2000
50,096
771
126
Originally posted by: upsciLLion
Originally posted by: oldsmoboat
This one time at band camp...
Click to expand...

You managed to shove a beach ball up your ass?
Click to expand...

B A N D not beach. (Don't ask me about the oboe, it's still a sore subject)
 
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upsciLLion

Diamond Member
Feb 21, 2001
5,947
1
81
Originally posted by: deathkoba
On my first time we were both totally drunk and played without a condom. I had a boner that just would NOT go down. Eventually 8 hours passed and I could not bear the pain any longer and then she let me slip right in the backside. Just the thought of it broke my nuts in 10 mins or so. We quickly washed up and hit the sac. After about 2 hours of sleep, I had to get up for work and experienced the worst fvckin pain in my life. Basically my dick was burning like sandpaper on sunburn. Called in sick and stayed home for yet another 6 hour fun. Was not exactly fun. True story btw.
Click to expand...

Priapisms are bad news.
 
S

Steve

Lifer
May 2, 2004
15,945
11
81
I remember reading one in Maxim (or Stuff?) a couple years ago. A guy was using anal beads on his girl. You're supposed to pull them out one at a time, slowly. He yanked them out the way you rip-start a lawnmower:

"There was a loud noise, some poop, and a lot of anger."
Click to expand...
 
A

Accipiter22

Banned
Feb 11, 2005
7,942
2
0
Originally posted by: upsciLLion
Originally posted by: Accipiter22
ooooooooooooooooooooh how did i forget this?!??!?!? First girl I ever fingered...we're sitting on her couch watching a movie....her parents are in the house.....so i start fingering her...I get one in.....two......I'm daring so I tried 3...and got it in....now I'm going with 3 and as she gets more into it I realize I could get 4 in.....now I'm thinking 'what the fvck this is NOT normal'.......so for about 20 more minutes i've got 4........and then I think you know what happened....five. the whole fist......my first fingering experience and i managed ot cram my whole fist in the girl. She got off twice on it. She was only about 5 3 and maybe 100 lbs.....and I fist rammed her. I felt like I was the one who got violated after that. Driving home that night I pulled over on the side of the road and vomitted.
Click to expand...

roflmao. You have to be joking.
Click to expand...


:( :( :( :( nope. That cavernous snatch will haunt me to the day I.....well the day i find a girl so tight I can barely get my pinky in. (insert 7 year old joke here)
 
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shimsham

Lifer
May 9, 2002
10,765
0
0
Originally posted by: sm8000
I remember reading one in Maxim (or Stuff?) a couple years ago. A guy was using anal beads on his girl. You're supposed to pull them out one at a time, slowly. He yanked them out the way you rip-start a lawnmower:

"There was a loud noise, some poop, and a lot of anger."
Click to expand...
Click to expand...

:laugh:
 
U

upsciLLion

Diamond Member
Feb 21, 2001
5,947
1
81
Originally posted by: Accipiter22
Originally posted by: upsciLLion
Originally posted by: Accipiter22
ooooooooooooooooooooh how did i forget this?!??!?!? First girl I ever fingered...we're sitting on her couch watching a movie....her parents are in the house.....so i start fingering her...I get one in.....two......I'm daring so I tried 3...and got it in....now I'm going with 3 and as she gets more into it I realize I could get 4 in.....now I'm thinking 'what the fvck this is NOT normal'.......so for about 20 more minutes i've got 4........and then I think you know what happened....five. the whole fist......my first fingering experience and i managed ot cram my whole fist in the girl. She got off twice on it. She was only about 5 3 and maybe 100 lbs.....and I fist rammed her. I felt like I was the one who got violated after that. Driving home that night I pulled over on the side of the road and vomitted.
Click to expand...

roflmao. You have to be joking.
Click to expand...


:( :( :( :( nope. That cavernous snatch will haunt me to the day I.....well the day i find a girl so tight I can barely get my pinky in. (insert 7 year old joke here)
Click to expand...

Here kitty kitty kitty...
 
T

thirdlegstump

Banned
Feb 12, 2001
8,713
0
0
Originally posted by: sm8000
I remember reading one in Maxim (or Stuff?) a couple years ago. A guy was using anal beads on his girl. You're supposed to pull them out one at a time, slowly. He yanked them out the way you rip-start a lawnmower:

"There was a loud noise, some poop, and a lot of anger."
Click to expand...
Click to expand...

LOL
 
A

Accipiter22

Banned
Feb 11, 2005
7,942
2
0
Originally posted by: shimsham
Originally posted by: sm8000
I remember reading one in Maxim (or Stuff?) a couple years ago. A guy was using anal beads on his girl. You're supposed to pull them out one at a time, slowly. He yanked them out the way you rip-start a lawnmower:

"There was a loud noise, some poop, and a lot of anger."
Click to expand...
Click to expand...

:laugh:
Click to expand...

my room mate did that to his gf. they wer ein the top bunk. (this is back in college)
 
Y

Yzzim

Lifer
Feb 13, 2000
11,990
1
76
Originally posted by: Accipiter22
ooooooooooooooooooooh how did i forget this?!??!?!? First girl I ever fingered...we're sitting on her couch watching a movie....her parents are in the house.....so i start fingering her...I get one in.....two......I'm daring so I tried 3...and got it in....now I'm going with 3 and as she gets more into it I realize I could get 4 in.....now I'm thinking 'what the fvck this is NOT normal'.......so for about 20 more minutes i've got 4........and then I think you know what happened....five. the whole fist......my first fingering experience and i managed ot cram my whole fist in the girl. She got off twice on it. She was only about 5 3 and maybe 100 lbs.....and I fist rammed her. I felt like I was the one who got violated after that. Driving home that night I pulled over on the side of the road and vomitted.
Click to expand...

roflmao
 
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