Whipped men in relationships.

[fs5]

Originally posted by: boyRacer

Originally posted by: geckojohn
That's really messed up about what you did to your friend. I would be pissed off also. Why could't you have invited him to join you at the movie? That's really strange...

I guess they know him to be like that already and understand... not like id wanna be a third wheel but it would feel pretty crappy to be a delivery boy.

I'm sure his friend knows he's already whipped. But that's understanding, they're young, in love, and engaged. If that's all the time they got the spend together in a while I would done the samething as him. But if it's a constant thing and they spend ALL their time together that's another story.

 

[gopunk]

Originally posted by: gopunk

Originally posted by: Redhotjrm

Originally posted by: gopunk
do your posts have points, or are you just sort of rambing about your life in the hopes that we'll emulate you...

I post to get a reaction, try to pull some sort of Insight from other bulletin board members. Many others have successfully done that very thing in this thread, but unfortunately you have strayed from the pack. Go walk alone.

so you're looking for advice then?

and btw, you say i've strayed from the pack like it's a bad thing...

 

[PlatinumGold]

Hey dude do you always put down the toilet seat for her too?

 

[dartworth]

Originally posted by: geckojohn
That's really messed up about what you did to your friend. I would be pissed off also. Why could't you have invited him to join you at the movie? That's really strange...

So selfish...keep this up for a couple of months and neither of you will have any friends. Then you can have all the time with each other you want.

 

[Red]

Originally posted by: PlatinumGold
Hey dude do you always put down the toilet seat for her too?

No, but cute kids you've got. Do you put down the toilet seat for your wife?

 

[PlatinumGold]

Originally posted by: Redhotjrm

Originally posted by: PlatinumGold
Hey dude do you always put down the toilet seat for her too?

No, but cute kids you've got. Do you put down the toilet seat for your wife?

not really. mb i should. i guess it would be more considerate. but it's not a rule.

i do have a friend that ALWAYS put down the toilet seat in his parents home, he and his dad would freak out when anyone came over and DIDN'T put the toilet seat down.

 

[0roo0roo]

Originally posted by: Redhotjrm
In response to my "Porn sucks" thread, I'd like to follow up with another thread that will most likely hit deep in the hearts of many.

Here is my view of my relationship: (Caution: I am not forcing any views, I am simply proposing the idea of a man/woman role in relationships.)
My babe and I truly love each other and there are certain things, based on the typical male view of being whipped, that would cause me to appear to be 'whipped'.

I am very courteous and mannery with her... I always open her car door when we go anywhere (grocery store) and then open the door into the place we're going to. She usually orders her own meal, but when we go somewhere and she eats the "regular" I'll order for her and she doesn't mind that.

Now, to the meat: Here is a scenario. My fiancee and I are watching a movie. Since we both work and go to school, time together is sparse and we like to spend it together. I had a friend show up during the movie, he lives about 20 mins away and I kindly asked him to go home because I was spending time with my girlfriend... and he did, no biggy.

I don't ever get on the computer when she is around and she would never do something like that with me around. I feel that I can get on the computer when she leaves late... she is the priority in my life (along with work, school, etc) so why should I choose getting on a computer over her when she is around?

And besides that, as I mentioned in the "Porn sucks." thread, we don't feel watching other people have sex is enjoyable or makes our relationship better in anyway. We have our time apart and with friends, but she is my partner for life, my best friend, lover, etc. and she will always be number one.

sounds like the honeymoon phase. give it time...

 

[Red]

Originally posted by: jfano

Originally posted by: geckojohn
That's really messed up about what you did to your friend. I would be pissed off also. Why could't you have invited him to join you at the movie? That's really strange...

So selfish...keep this up for a couple of months and neither of you will have any friends. Then you can have all the time with each other you want.

We've been "keeping this up" the entire time we've dated... and have plenty of friends. I just feel that sometimes guys just give into their friends for fear of being called "whipped". In my situation... if you had just a little time to spend with your girl and a friend shows up unexpected... where does your priority lay? I understand that if you're not in a serious relationship than your friends do have a priority,

 

[dangereuxjeux]

If I were your friend, I'd be pissed. He lives 20 min. away and you spend large amounts of of time with her constantly, but when he gets there you really tell him to buzz off?

I love my gf too, man, and I spend more time with her than any of my friends, but you gotta have some time for yourself, and for your friends. Your friend's probably know you longer than she has, and if things ever ended with her, you know what? He'd probably still be there for you after she's gone [unless you keep treating him like that].

Good for you and your girl, but you need to find some balance.

 

[Bleep]

my best friend, lover, etc. and she will always be number one

I take it that the lover part means a sexual relationship. Somehow this does not sound right to me. You are involved in a immorial relationship accorking to religous standards but somehow porn is not normal or is immorial?
Now to the etc part. I surmise that to mean BOSS and or controller of your life. You want to be thought of as a man that knows what is the most important things in life must be but you are still living at home and unable to support yourself. Are you pussy whipped? damm right you are, kissing off a friend is the lowest thing that you could do. This was just plain selfish no matter how you try and rationlise it.

Bleep

 

[TheNinja]

I feel like I'm at a lecture here and Redhotjrm is giving us the keys to a perfect relationship.....take notes everyone, it could come in handy

/Staley8 scribbles furiously on a notepad

 

[gopunk]

We've been "keeping this up" the entire time we've dated... and have plenty of friends. I just feel that sometimes guys just give into their friends for fear of being called "whipped". In my situation... if you had just a little time to spend with your girl and a friend shows up unexpected... where does your priority lay? I understand that if you're not in a serious relationship than your friends do have a priority,

if you're in a serious relationship and engaged, presumably you expect to spend the rest of your life with her. so why would you blow off your friend, who could have to move away at any time for whatever reasons... romance, money, etc?

also, you never answered my other question... so you're looking for advice here? that's what i could infer from you saying you came here to gather our insight. but frankly, it doesn't sound like you're looking for advice at all.

 

[dartworth]

Originally posted by: Redhotjrm

Originally posted by: jfano

Originally posted by: geckojohn
That's really messed up about what you did to your friend. I would be pissed off also. Why could't you have invited him to join you at the movie? That's really strange...

So selfish...keep this up for a couple of months and neither of you will have any friends. Then you can have all the time with each other you want.

We've been "keeping this up" the entire time we've dated... and have plenty of friends. I just feel that sometimes guys just give into their friends for fear of being called "whipped". In my situation... if you had just a little time to spend with your girl and a friend shows up unexpected... where does your priority lay? I understand that if you're not in a serious relationship than your friends do have a priority,

Yes...you are whipped...yes you are selfish...yes you are a loser

 

[Yax]

Originally posted by: Encryptic
Damn, I actually posted something "decent" for once? Man, I'm losing my edge.

Yup, I smell loser coming. I think he's whipped and you're just too nice to tell him so I'll do it.

Redhotjrm, you're whipped.

 

[fs5]

balance is key.. let not assume that he spends all his time with her.

 

[BooGiMaN]

how long u been 'together' i have a feeling that whole porn thing is something u did to impress her or feel better about yourself..and this thread is an attempt to have us comfirm to you that your not whipped no matter what your freinds say

if its a fairly new relationship then its the 'newness' of it..if its not i dunno what to tell u i understand the lovey dovey stuff but to me when people act this way out there i something weird going on ..

like they either want the whole world and themselves to know how 'perfect' the relationship is or they are compensating for something thats lackign in the relationship.

Im not necessarly saying this is you but i have seen enough peopel that act like this so that it just seems fake to me.

 

[iamwiz82]

it sounds as if you fell for the first girl who gave you the time of day and have been interlocked ever since. This coming from a 21 year old male who has been dating one person for over 3 years and has lived with her for over 2.

 

[geckojohn]

Redhot: Just listen to everyone here... YOU are being whipped whether you know it or not. It seems like your gf is a controlling and manipulative person. Is this your first long term relationship? It seems like a classic first experience... you'll learn soon.

 

[PlatinumGold]

Originally posted by: geckojohn
Redhot: Just listen to everyone here... YOU are being whipped whether you know it or not. It seems like your gf is a controlling and manipulative person. Is this your first long term relationship? It seems like a classic first experience... you'll learn soon.

i don't see any evidence that his gf is manipulative.

i believe that he has subjected himself to her and he probably has some self image issues, but i haven't seen evidence of her being manipulative yet.

she might be, but as i said i haven't seen evidence of that in his threads yet.

 

[Red]

Originally posted by: fivespeed5
balance is key.. let not assume that he spends all his time with her.

Thanks fivespeed. People are ASSUMING that I spend ALL of my time with her. As I've previously mentioned, we both have friends, some mutual, some not, and we spend time apart and with friends. The point of my thread is this:

I think that some guys are so afraid of the thought of being "whipped" that if at any time their "friends" needed a favor or needed something, they always come before their soulmate/wife/etc. This need not apply to someone who has is dating a girl or something else, I'm talking about a serious relationship.

I'm man enough to ask my friends to call me later or do something else if it is MY time with girlfriend. Most friends come and go, some stay forever, and those who are in it for the haul long are not bothered with the fact that some times I need to spend time with my girl.

 

[Red]

Originally posted by: iamwiz82
it sounds as if you fell for the first girl who gave you the time of day and have been interlocked ever since. This coming from a 21 year old male who has been dating one person for over 3 years and has lived with her for over 2.

Trust me pal, more than a few girls have given me more than the time of the day. To the best of my knowledge, and to the best of what feels right to me, she is the one. That is why I asked for her hand in marriage one year ago.

 

[Don Vito Corleone]

I would have to say you are showing some major signs of PW syndrome, most significantly the fact that you sent away a good friend in favor of "spending time" with your GF. Surely there was no reason you couldn't have invited him to stay and watch the movie if he wanted.

 

[geckojohn]

Originally posted by: Redhotjrm

Originally posted by: iamwiz82 it sounds as if you fell for the first girl who gave you the time of day and have been interlocked ever since. This coming from a 21 year old male who has been dating one person for over 3 years and has lived with her for over 2.

Trust me pal, more than a few girls have given me more than the time of the day. To the best of my knowledge, and to the best of what feels right to me, she is the one. That is why I asked for her hand in marriage one year ago.

U suuuure???

 

[BooGiMaN]

Originally posted by: Redhotjrm

Originally posted by: fivespeed5
balance is key.. let not assume that he spends all his time with her.

Thanks fivespeed. People are ASSUMING that I spend ALL of my time with her. As I've previously mentioned, we both have friends, some mutual, some not, and we spend time apart and with friends. The point of my thread is this:

I think that some guys are so afraid of the thought of being "whipped" that if at any time their "friends" needed a favor or needed something, they always come before their soulmate/wife/etc. This need not apply to someone who has is dating a girl or something else, I'm talking about a serious relationship.

I'm man enough to ask my friends to call me later or do something else if it is MY time with girlfriend. Most friends come and go, some stay forever, and those who are in it for the haul long are not bothered with the fact that some times I need to spend time with my girl.

'My babe and I truly love each other and there are certain things, based on the typical male view of being whipped, that would cause me to appear to be 'whipped'.'

By your quote on the intitial post you to are afraid of beign labeled whipped..admit that you are in fact whipped by our standards if you have such strong convictions about your relationship

If i recall correctly in your porn thread you stated u used to enjoy it and in fact do not now because you are with her...

your tone and your posts are eerily similar to a convert in any religion...'you have seen the light'

your posts so far are preachings from the 'good book of loving relationships'. sermons on the life of a true pious and porn free man that has now shunned and cast aside the flesh pictures.

that is why so many are attacking u.

You my freind are in for a slap in the face when reality hits home.....i hope she doesnt dump u, or worse dump you because your too nice of a guy.....because of your dependance on her, you will take a very long time to recover.

i have seen it before...so anyhoos admit your 'whipped' it that doesnt bother u as u state in your reply

 

[Lola]

Originally posted by: Redhotjrm

Originally posted by: fivespeed5
balance is key.. let not assume that he spends all his time with her.

Thanks fivespeed. People are ASSUMING that I spend ALL of my time with her. As I've previously mentioned, we both have friends, some mutual, some not, and we spend time apart and with friends. The point of my thread is this:

I think that some guys are so afraid of the thought of being "whipped" that if at any time their "friends" needed a favor or needed something, they always come before their soulmate/wife/etc. This need not apply to someone who has is dating a girl or something else, I'm talking about a serious relationship.

I'm man enough to ask my friends to call me later or do something else if it is MY time with girlfriend. Most friends come and go, some stay forever, and those who are in it for the haul long are not bothered with the fact that some times I need to spend time with my girl.

i didnt see any mention of how long you have been together...if you did, i am sorry i did not notice it...can you please say how long? i am assuming for quite sometime since you said that the 2 of you are engaged.

Lemme tell you from experience..you really dont know someone until you live with them, their little idosyncrocies(sp?), etc. thats a whole other ball game. you learn that life is damn hard and there are too many ups and downs to count... you will know though, in the end that you two are really menat for each other if both "stick it out" for the bad as well as joyous times