When is it ok to ask people how much they make

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Veliko

Diamond Member
Feb 16, 2011
3,597
127
106
I would say it is one potential category to personal value but not the sole category or the most important category and would not confer or prevent 'looser status' by itself

Please show me where I said I didn't think there could be something wrong with a 35-year old earning 38k

That's some furious backtracking you're doing here.
 

Imp

Lifer
Feb 8, 2000
18,828
184
106
I don't see the big deal. Once you hit ~$50k (varies by area of course) and all your needs are covered as long as you're reasonably intelligent and can control your spending... there isn't a big difference until you break $250k. Sub $250k you pretty much own mostly the same things, they're just nicer or more of them. But that loses its novelty fast.

Once you break that higher barrier, I still can't think of a big difference you might see. You might own multiple more expensive items... The trick is to become extremely wealthy fast and have time available to put the money to good use. Most people earning $250k+ are probably doing more than that 9-5.

That sounds about right, which is why I find it hilarious how some dicks I know in real-life get all high and up about their salry. OMFG, they make $80k with massive OT and the "losers" only makes $60k. Even better is the omfg, $80k vs. $75k.

Because I hate my job so much, I've been doing the math on how much I need to actually be "wealthy". The answer is an annual income of $800k or winning about $15M in the lottery. That amount would allow for running a business, giving regularly to charity, beating inflation, hiring a personal assistant, and to play.
 

Tweak155

Lifer
Sep 23, 2003
11,449
264
126
That sounds about right, which is why I find it hilarious how some dicks I know in real-life get all high and up about their salry. OMFG, they make $80k with massive OT and the "losers" only makes $60k. Even better is the omfg, $80k vs. $75k.

Because I hate my job so much, I've been doing the math on how much I need to actually be "wealthy". The answer is an annual income of $800k or winning about $15M in the lottery. That amount would allow for running a business, giving regularly to charity, beating inflation, hiring a personal assistant, and to play.

While $80k isn't a poor man by any means, it isn't some glorious lifestyle. All it does is buy a bigger savings account. And I imagine in some areas, $80k doesn't get you much at all.

Here, it is plenty to live off of, save, vacation, etc. But ultimately it isn't all too different than $50k when things are that cheap.

The other thing is, when you get to higher salaries, those $3-$5k increases don't mean anything immediately. Eventually you need $10-$20k changes to even make it worth while, and even then your lifestyle doesn't really change.

I just recently helped my wife get a $17k change in salary, and on top of that, she is now compensated for OT. You know what changed financially/materialistically? How much I save a month (also she gets paid once a week now instead of bi-weekly, which is nice). Whooptie do. The real benefit is they don't want to work her OT ;).
 

vshah

Lifer
Sep 20, 2003
19,003
24
81
i don't mind sharing with close friends, especially if they're in the same field and we're discussing compensation in general.
 

purbeast0

No Lifer
Sep 13, 2001
53,664
6,547
126
While $80k isn't a poor man by any means, it isn't some glorious lifestyle. All it does is buy a bigger savings account. And I imagine in some areas, $80k doesn't get you much at all.

Here, it is plenty to live off of, save, vacation, etc. But ultimately it isn't all too different than $50k when things are that cheap.

The other thing is, when you get to higher salaries, those $3-$5k increases don't mean anything immediately. Eventually you need $10-$20k changes to even make it worth while, and even then your lifestyle doesn't really change.

I just recently helped my wife get a $17k change in salary, and on top of that, she is now compensated for OT. You know what changed financially/materialistically? How much I save a month (also she gets paid once a week now instead of bi-weekly, which is nice). Whooptie do. The real benefit is they don't want to work her OT ;).

the thing i've noticed as i've made more money, is that the "eh, its only $X, i'll just buy it" ... the X value has increased. when i was making less it would be like for a bluray or something that was $20 i'd get it cause its "only" $20. now i get things that i probably wouldn't have on my starting salary because its "only" $50. i'm not saying those are the exact numbers, but you know what i mean.

i've also noticed that as i've made more money my tastes have gone up as well when going on vacations and eating out. but at the same time, as i've made more money, i also go out to the bars/clubs/lounges less because i realize how much of a waste of money it is when i could be doing the same thing at home for much less. but i still love doing that stuff on vacation.

basically now my vacations are much more luxurious/splurgy than they used to be.
 

madoka

Diamond Member
Jun 22, 2004
4,344
712
121
Because I hate my job so much, I've been doing the math on how much I need to actually be "wealthy". The answer is an annual income of $800k or winning about $15M in the lottery. That amount would allow for running a business, giving regularly to charity, beating inflation, hiring a personal assistant, and to play.

I used to think like this, but I found that as you make more money, you spend more money. You assume you'll maintain the same lifestyle you have, just with more money. But in reality, your lifestyle will change. All of a sudden you think you can afford a fancier car, another computer, high end appliances, etc. Before you know it, you own multiple homes, have employees to pay, expensive cars to maintain, etc. and you find yourself wishing you had more money.
 
Nov 8, 2012
20,842
4,785
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the thing i've noticed as i've made more money, is that the "eh, its only $X, i'll just buy it" ... the X value has increased. when i was making less it would be like for a bluray or something that was $20 i'd get it cause its "only" $20. now i get things that i probably wouldn't have on my starting salary because its "only" $50. i'm not saying those are the exact numbers, but you know what i mean.

i've also noticed that as i've made more money my tastes have gone up as well when going on vacations and eating out. but at the same time, as i've made more money, i also go out to the bars/clubs/lounges less because i realize how much of a waste of money it is when i could be doing the same thing at home for much less. but i still love doing that stuff on vacation.

basically now my vacations are much more luxurious/splurgy than they used to be.

Quit fooling yourself. Your tastes aren't going up, it's just your X adjusting for inflation year-to-year :D

As my salary goes up slowly the more I keep saying "I need to save more. I'm not saving enough." It starts to get annoying thinking about it with every purchase. Can't I just play the game everyone else plays? You know, the "think later, buy now!" game? I'm tired of worrying about retirement damnit!
 

Tweak155

Lifer
Sep 23, 2003
11,449
264
126
the thing i've noticed as i've made more money, is that the "eh, its only $X, i'll just buy it" ... the X value has increased. when i was making less it would be like for a bluray or something that was $20 i'd get it cause its "only" $20. now i get things that i probably wouldn't have on my starting salary because its "only" $50. i'm not saying those are the exact numbers, but you know what i mean.

i've also noticed that as i've made more money my tastes have gone up as well when going on vacations and eating out. but at the same time, as i've made more money, i also go out to the bars/clubs/lounges less because i realize how much of a waste of money it is when i could be doing the same thing at home for much less. but i still love doing that stuff on vacation.

basically now my vacations are much more luxurious/splurgy than they used to be.

Unfortunately I'm tough to even get a $20 out of as far as material things, but once I buy a bigger ticket item, I stop worrying about the smaller dollars. Bars / going out and vacations is where my extra goes as well.

My tastes haven't really gone up for the most part.

All in all, not a big difference. The best thing a higher salary "buys" you is not having to worry about any bills. But, you can also achieve this with a lower salary and smart spending.
 

purbeast0

No Lifer
Sep 13, 2001
53,664
6,547
126
Quit fooling yourself. Your tastes aren't going up, it's just your X adjusting for inflation year-to-year :D

As my salary goes up slowly the more I keep saying "I need to save more. I'm not saving enough." It starts to get annoying thinking about it with every purchase. Can't I just play the game everyone else plays? You know, the "think later, buy now!" game? I'm tired of worrying about retirement damnit!

or if you are well off enough, you can both save enough and enjoy your money by buying things you like.
 
Nov 8, 2012
20,842
4,785
146
or if you are well off enough, you can both save enough and enjoy your money by buying things you like.

It's tough. I'm in a rough rough stage in life of saving for a wedding. saving for a future kid. saving for retirement. All the while I still have to save some for occasional trip.

Doesn't exactly leave much room.

I'll be happy when I can hit these while all the normal bills are paid:
$17500 max out 401k ($35000 when married)
$5000 max out IRA ($10000 when married)
~$1500 for trips
~$15k+ for extra savings to stow away for later usage
 

Exterous

Super Moderator
Jun 20, 2006
20,582
3,791
126
That's some furious backtracking you're doing here.

It might seem like that to someone who has little to no reading comprehension. Still waiting for you to show where I said I didn't think there could be something wrong with a 35-year old earning 38k
 

Veliko

Diamond Member
Feb 16, 2011
3,597
127
106
It might seem like that to someone who has little to no reading comprehension. Still waiting for you to show where I said I didn't think there could be something wrong with a 35-year old earning 38k

Awww, bless. You're trying so hard with this now.

This was your first post in the thread:

There is not necessarily something wrong with a 35 year old making 19k but it does provide evidence warranting additional investigation to determine potential loser status

So if you're not making some kind of derogatory point about 35-year olds who only earn 19k, what was the purpose of the post?
 
May 16, 2000
13,522
0
0
I had a college kid ask me this recently. Since he is aiming for the same degree I have, I told him. He seemed like that would suit him just fine vs his @ college job (I'm sure sub $10/hr).

I don't see the big deal. Once you hit ~$50k (varies by area of course) and all your needs are covered as long as you're reasonably intelligent and can control your spending... there isn't a big difference until you break $250k. Sub $250k you pretty much own mostly the same things, they're just nicer or more of them. But that loses its novelty fast.

Once you break that higher barrier, I still can't think of a big difference you might see. You might own multiple more expensive items... The trick is to become extremely wealthy fast and have time available to put the money to good use. Most people earning $250k+ are probably doing more than that 9-5.

I'd work 3 days a week and cut my salary by 40% if given the option (of course my wife would have to be able to do the same). Or even 4 days and taking a 20% hit is fine with me as long as I'm just doing 32hrs.

You do realize that only ~15% of people will ever hit $50k/yr now, right? 85% of the country makes it on less. 55% makes it on under $30k in fact.
 

Exterous

Super Moderator
Jun 20, 2006
20,582
3,791
126
Awww, bless. You're trying so hard with this now.

This was your first post in the thread:



So if you're not making some kind of derogatory point about 35-year olds who only earn 19k, what was the purpose of the post?

o_O I am well aware of my first post. Do you understand what 'necessarily' means? That is a rhetorical question because you clearly do not as you could only think my post was derogatory towards '35 year olds who only earn 19k' if you had no idea what 'necessarily' means.

It precludes it from being a blanket statement. By its very nature it means that it can't be a derogatory statement about '35-year olds who earn only 19k' because your statement is a blanket statement that includes ALL 35 year olds making 19k while mine notes that there is not enough information to make the determination on income alone.

So, taking baby steps in explaining my point (because you seem to need them), my point is that people confer the status of 'looser' for a variety of reasons, one contributing factor of which is income. However, a low income does not necessarily (there's that word again!) provide reason enough on its own. That said low salary, when combined with other aspects and reasons could result in the labeling of a person as a 'looser' by members of society.
 
May 16, 2000
13,522
0
0
o_O I am well aware of my first post. Do you understand what 'necessarily' means? That is a rhetorical question because you clearly do not as you could only think my post was derogatory towards '35 year olds who only earn 19k' if you had no idea what 'necessarily' means.

It precludes it from being a blanket statement. By its very nature it means that it can't be a derogatory statement about '35-year olds who earn only 19k' because your statement is a blanket statement that includes ALL 35 year olds making 19k while mine notes that there is not enough information to make the determination on income alone.

So, taking baby steps in explaining my point (because you seem to need them), my point is that people confer the status of 'looser' for a variety of reasons, one contributing factor of which is income. However, a low income does not necessarily (there's that word again!) provide reason enough on its own. That said low salary, when combined with other aspects and reasons could result in the labeling of a person as a 'looser' by members of society.

This would be the same 'society' that decided women didn't need jobs or the vote, that blacks were coons and property, that it was ok to arrest and intern slopes, and that elected W...TWICE?

Tell me again in what way 'society' is a measure of anything but stupidity?
 

Veliko

Diamond Member
Feb 16, 2011
3,597
127
106
o_O I am well aware of my first post. Do you understand what 'necessarily' means? That is a rhetorical question because you clearly do not as you could only think my post was derogatory towards '35 year olds who only earn 19k' if you had no idea what 'necessarily' means.

It precludes it from being a blanket statement. By its very nature it means that it can't be a derogatory statement about '35-year olds who earn only 19k' because your statement is a blanket statement that includes ALL 35 year olds making 19k while mine notes that there is not enough information to make the determination on income alone.

So, taking baby steps in explaining my point (because you seem to need them), my point is that people confer the status of 'looser' for a variety of reasons, one contributing factor of which is income. However, a low income does not necessarily (there's that word again!) provide reason enough on its own. That said low salary, when combined with other aspects and reasons could result in the labeling of a person as a 'looser' by members of society.

The amount of effort that you're putting into this backtracking is quite astonishing.

If the example of a 35 year old earning 19k hadn't been mentioned, and instead it was of a 35-year old earning 38k, are you telling me that your first post in this thread would have been this:

There is not necessarily something wrong with a 35 year old making 38k but it does provide evidence warranting additional investigation to determine potential loser status
 

Tweak155

Lifer
Sep 23, 2003
11,449
264
126
You do realize that only ~15% of people will ever hit $50k/yr now, right? 85% of the country makes it on less. 55% makes it on under $30k in fact.

I'm just saying people should focus on enough to cover their needs, some savings and a little extra. What that dollar amount is for their area, I don't know ($50k was just a made up figure).

Shooting for more has diminishing returns that appear pretty quickly.
 
May 16, 2000
13,522
0
0
I'm just saying people should focus on enough to cover their needs, some savings and a little extra. What that dollar amount is for their area, I don't know ($50k was just a made up figure).

Shooting for more has diminishing returns that appear pretty quickly.

Gotcha, my bad. Carry on.
 

ViviTheMage

Lifer
Dec 12, 2002
36,189
87
91
madgenius.com
While $80k isn't a poor man by any means, it isn't some glorious lifestyle. All it does is buy a bigger savings account. And I imagine in some areas, $80k doesn't get you much at all.

Here, it is plenty to live off of, save, vacation, etc. But ultimately it isn't all too different than $50k when things are that cheap.

The other thing is, when you get to higher salaries, those $3-$5k increases don't mean anything immediately. Eventually you need $10-$20k changes to even make it worth while, and even then your lifestyle doesn't really change.

I just recently helped my wife get a $17k change in salary, and on top of that, she is now compensated for OT. You know what changed financially/materialistically? How much I save a month (also she gets paid once a week now instead of bi-weekly, which is nice). Whooptie do. The real benefit is they don't want to work her OT ;).

I agree with this ... I recently went from 40k to 80k+ in for the last year (new job, raise at new job right away, etc)... the money feels the same.... maybe a few extra thousand at the end of the year that is going towards a new car, but overall it feels the same. I do the same stuff, save the same, similar vacations, etc.

the thing i've noticed as i've made more money, is that the "eh, its only $X, i'll just buy it" ... the X value has increased. when i was making less it would be like for a bluray or something that was $20 i'd get it cause its "only" $20. now i get things that i probably wouldn't have on my starting salary because its "only" $50. i'm not saying those are the exact numbers, but you know what i mean.

i've also noticed that as i've made more money my tastes have gone up as well when going on vacations and eating out. but at the same time, as i've made more money, i also go out to the bars/clubs/lounges less because i realize how much of a waste of money it is when i could be doing the same thing at home for much less. but i still love doing that stuff on vacation.

basically now my vacations are much more luxurious/splurgy than they used to be.

and I also agree with this, I used to second guess $20 for something, but now I just get it, ha.

I am still young enough I love to have lame hotels, but I love splurging on the expeditions and things we do on them.
 
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trungma

Senior member
Jul 1, 2001
466
36
91
I'm just saying people should focus on enough to cover their needs, some savings and a little extra. What that dollar amount is for their area, I don't know ($50k was just a made up figure).

Shooting for more has diminishing returns that appear pretty quickly.

So true. After making more money, you will find that you can use more money. It's a never ending cycle. For myself, I found that after about $80k my lifestyle didn't substantially change.
 

alkemyst

No Lifer
Feb 13, 2001
83,769
19
81
He said he works as much as he wants, whenever he wants. This is likely not a standard tenure position, but is more likely a special tutoring service or something.

My wife tutored through an agency and got something like $50/hr for it. Clients paid the agency $70 I think. She had one kid she tutored once per week for 1 hour in one class. The kid's parents had tutors for all of their children (4), every day of the week in different subjects. $50 * 4 kids * 5 days/wk = $1000/wk in tutoring = $4k / month. Some people are easily willing to pay a lot.

Now, if he has special knowledge (say, organic chem), and he's willing to tutor in groups of ~5, he can make bank tutoring college kids all year long, especially if he is in a big city with many universities.

He lead with he makes $2000 for a full day and $1k for a half day. He said he works everyday.

Pay attention.
 

sze5003

Lifer
Aug 18, 2012
14,320
683
126
I make more than my peers in the same field that I studied with. The IT field pays alright and it pays well if you are a developer. You just have to be at the right companies. I imagine my other buddies make more than me because they don't work for a large corporation, hence it's easier to move up, ask for more money.

I always say not enough because I'm paying off student loans so I don't have much money left at the end of the month. And it takes time to buy what I want or if I want to spend on something I do it carefully. Also depends where you live and if you get extra taxes taken out like city wage tax, god I hate it lol.
 

Imp

Lifer
Feb 8, 2000
18,828
184
106
While $80k isn't a poor man by any means, it isn't some glorious lifestyle. All it does is buy a bigger savings account. And I imagine in some areas, $80k doesn't get you much at all.

Here, it is plenty to live off of, save, vacation, etc. But ultimately it isn't all too different than $50k when things are that cheap.

The other thing is, when you get to higher salaries, those $3-$5k increases don't mean anything immediately. Eventually you need $10-$20k changes to even make it worth while, and even then your lifestyle doesn't really change.

I just recently helped my wife get a $17k change in salary, and on top of that, she is now compensated for OT. You know what changed financially/materialistically? How much I save a month (also she gets paid once a week now instead of bi-weekly, which is nice). Whooptie do. The real benefit is they don't want to work her OT ;).

Funny. I applied and got interviewed (and failed) for a job recently that I didn't want. The pay increase would have been about 15% more, which was essentially pocket change: not enough to change my lifestyle, just enough to save a few more bucks towards god knows what.

I would need a 50% increase right now to make a major lifestyle change; that is, move to a better place while maintaining my current spending and savings level.

The city I live in is the most or second most expensive in the country. If I were to move to a smaller town further away, one that wouldn't qualify as a bedroom community for my current city, I'd live like a king on my current salary.