What's up with people who buy Hummers?

Icepick

Diamond Member
Nov 1, 2004
3,663
4
81
On my daily walk through the parking lot where I work I noticed that there's a brown H2 parked there nearly every day. It got me to thinking that Hummers really are the perfect vehicle for a##holes. If the vehicle you drive says anything about you it clearly shows that owners of H2's are a##holes.

Performed a quick search of the 'net and found this gem of a website.
http://www.fuh2.com/

If this is a repost then please forgive me as I humbly repent.
 
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Slew Foot

Lifer
Sep 22, 2005
12,379
96
86
In the mid 2000s every random assclown had a H2 that they 5th mortgaged their house for. Now you rarely see them on the road.
 

Icepick

Diamond Member
Nov 1, 2004
3,663
4
81
One of the funniest things I've seen happened a few years ago as I was waiting in the parking lot of a restaurant one Sunday morning. An older fellow (estimated 50's-ish) and his wife hopped into what must have been his "new" hummer to drive away. The only problem is that he underestimated the size of the parking lot as he attempted to back up and maneuver his vehicle out of the lot. I stood there watching in amazement as this guy proceeded to pull forward, backup, turn the wheel, pull forward, back up, turn the wheel, rinse, repeat for 15 minutes before he finally freed himself. I'm only disappointed that I didn't have a video camera at the time.
 

HeXen

Diamond Member
Dec 13, 2009
7,835
37
91
i don't think anything of a vehicle. its the drivers behavior behind the wheel that matters.
 

ShawnD1

Lifer
May 24, 2003
15,987
2
81
Hummers are super rare up here. I remember seeing one "parked" on top of a snow bank facing the wrong way with the hazard lights flashing (he must have crossed lanes and smashed into the side)
It made me lol
 

glenn1

Lifer
Sep 6, 2000
25,383
1,013
126
On my daily walk through the parking lot where I work I noticed that there's a brown H2 parked there nearly every day. It got me to thinking that Hummers really are the perfect vehicle for a##holes. If the vehicle you drive says anything about you it clearly shows that owners of H2's are a##holes.

Performed a quick search of the 'net and found this gem of a website.
http://www.fuh2.com/

If this is a repost then please forgive me as I humbly repent.

Maybe they just attract drivers who want to annoy smug little pricks like you who can't help making judgments about what people drive as if you're some sort of trend setter. Honestly, drive whatever the fvck car you want to, it's not like your choice of vehicle provides you with some kind of moral authority that those who drive SUVs don't have.
 

kranky

Elite Member
Oct 9, 1999
21,019
156
106
Loved this from the site linked in the OP. I removed the repetitive lines that were in each verse.

Your wallet’s fat, your car is rank
Each burst of speed costs half a tank
At each stop sign and traffic light
Regardless if it’s day or night
They’ll mutter “asshole” and they’re right

You can’t drive mud, you can’t clear rocks
With Chevy Tahoe frame and shocks
What illness do you suffer from?
Are your aesthetic senses numb?
How does it feel to be so dumb?

If I gave you what you deserve
I’d cut you off and make you swerve
I’d follow you across the land
I’d top your gas tank off with sand
And flip the bird with my free hand

It’s true you are the Tax-break winner
You spent it on ‘roo-bars and Spinners
Full fifty-grand you can omit,
But what remains to show for it?
A four-point-three-ton pile of shit.

Despite my venomous complaint
I’ve got an atom of restraint
I hope this point you haven’t missed
Your car selection makes me pissed
In spite of that I can resist

For 3 or more: the carpool lane
But what if you have half a brain?
You solo drive each day to work
That’s why your friends all joke and smirk
Come Humm on THIS, you fucking jerk!
 

davmat787

Diamond Member
Nov 30, 2010
5,512
24
76
Bitching about people driving Hummers is sooooo 2005. Now that Obama is in office, it isn't an issue. Everyone knows this. :rolleyes:
 

QueBert

Lifer
Jan 6, 2002
22,940
1,134
126
To OP, assholes drive every kind of car. The biggest asshole I've ever met drove a Camry. Meanwhile the coolest guy I've ever met drove an Excursion, which I'm sure would rank uber high on your "cars that assholes drive" list.
 

ponyo

Lifer
Feb 14, 2002
19,688
2,811
126
I wished I bought one back in '07-'08 when gas price was over $4 gallon and used mint H2 were going for $15k.
 

Pardus

Diamond Member
Jun 29, 2000
8,197
21
81
2013 for fusion hybrid will be getting 48 mpg. will take that over a hummer any day.
 

PieIsAwesome

Diamond Member
Feb 11, 2007
4,054
1
0
All those reasons for hating that car are stupid and the haters are probably douchebags. If people want to drive a hummer, let them, I don't give a damn.
 

thegimp03

Diamond Member
Jul 5, 2004
7,420
2
81
I don't see nearly as many H2's around here as I did 5-6 years ago. Back then they were *the* soccer mom mobile.
 

JulesMaximus

No Lifer
Jul 3, 2003
74,553
942
126
My neighbor has a Chevy Tahoe (same platform as the H2 basically) and he can't even park it in his driveway because it leaks oil all over the place. Quality vehicle there.

He's a nice guy though.

Smart money is on the smaller hybrids or cars that get decent mileage. I can't imagine anyone who drives more than 20 miles a day would buy one of these vehicles with gas hovering around $4/gallon again.
 

moshquerade

No Lifer
Nov 1, 2001
61,504
12
56
then what about a hummer in a hummer while humming and eating hummus.
what's up people who do that?
 
Apr 17, 2003
37,622
0
76
On my daily walk through the parking lot where I work I noticed that there's a brown H2 parked there nearly every day. It got me to thinking that Hummers really are the perfect vehicle for a##holes. If the vehicle you drive says anything about you it clearly shows that owners of H2's are a##holes.

Performed a quick search of the 'net and found this gem of a website.
http://www.fuh2.com/

If this is a repost then please forgive me as I humbly repent.

Other than the tax loophole thing, the same reasons for hating a H2 in your link applies a vast array of vehicles (range rover, tahoe, etc.).
 

CPA

Elite Member
Nov 19, 2001
30,322
4
0
Yes, because not liking something automatically means you're jealous of it. :rolleyes:

I really don't see a good reason to have a Hummer over other SUVs.

Not liking it is one thing, making assumptions about the owners is another. Who the fuck cares if someone owns a Hummer? Well apparently the OP, because all Hummer owners are assholes in his eyes.
 

Raduque

Lifer
Aug 22, 2004
13,140
138
106
Hey QBert, nice tits.


I personally don't like the way H2s and H3s look. They're ugly, bulky and have exaggerated lines that make me think of a something a 12 year old boy would design, only it's missing missile launchers, flame throwers and spiky wheels.

I wouldn't drive or own one, but it DOES seem that quite a few owners of these vehicles are douchebags who swerve in and out of traffic, tailgate, merge without looking and otherwise attempt to be "bullys of the road".
 

ponyo

Lifer
Feb 14, 2002
19,688
2,811
126
My neighbor has a Chevy Tahoe (same platform as the H2 basically) and he can't even park it in his driveway because it leaks oil all over the place. Quality vehicle there.

He's a nice guy though.

Smart money is on the smaller hybrids or cars that get decent mileage. I can't imagine anyone who drives more than 20 miles a day would buy one of these vehicles with gas hovering around $4/gallon again.

My sister owns a Tahoe. She had a Yukon before. She loves it and it's a great vehicle. My cousin owns a Yukon Denali. It's his second one. He bought another one after he sold the first after ~250k miles. He loves it. He puts about 40k miles a year on his Yukon. He couldn't care less about gas prices. He just wants comfortable ride.