whats the most embarassing thing you have ever done at work?

[Fritzo]

Not embarrasing for me, but one of our service reps recorded this gem sometime back. I guess the guy couldn't hold it:

http://members.toast.net/dougz/callwhilepee.mp3

 

[kranky]

Client called to book the sound studio for a recording session. It was always in use so you had to call a couple months ahead of time. We agreed on a date about 3 months out and I wrote it on my calendar.

Unfortunately, my desk calendar was not the official reservation log. There was a separate wall calendar where studio bookings were kept, and I forgot to write it there.

So 3 months later on the fateful day, I go in, look at my desk calendar and see the note for the booking I made months ago. I wonder why I wrote a studio booking on my personal calendar. I go over to the "official" booking list for today and see a different group booked. This. Is. Very. Bad.

I run over to the manager and explain what happened. An empathetic sort, he told me that it was my problem and when the group I booked shows up, I needed to tell them I screwed up and they aren't going to be using the studio today or any other day for at least 2 months. And as a parting jab, he pointed out that it could hardly be worse since the client has almost certainly arranged to have studio musicians come in, and the client will have to pay them for the day no matter what. He figured the client will end up about $10K in the hole and we'll surely lose them as a client not to mention the bad word of mouth.

No doubt: 404 Continued employment not found.

So I try to call the client. Answering machine. I leave a short message asking him to call me ASAP.

At 8 AM the people that were "officially" booked arrive and set up in the studio. Nothing to do but wait for the crapstorm.

At 9:30 AM my client returns my call. I clear my throat and say, "Bob, about 3 months ago you called me to book our sound studio for today --"

Bob cuts me off and says, "DAMN, you're right. I forgot all about that. We cancelled that production and I forgot to call you. Just send me a bill for the studio fee. Hope there's no hard feelings." I said I would take care of it.

I tell the manager who says I'm the luckiest dude on the planet. He actually bills my client for half the fee and tells him he cut him a break for being such a good customer. The client is happy as can be.

So although it worked out, the 2 hours of sheer terror while I waited for my client and his entourage to show up, scream at me for an hour for costing them a fortune and delaying their production, and then get fired, was actually 90% as bad as if the worst had happened.

 

[Murloc]

Client calle[...]ir production, and then get fired, was actually 90% as bad as if the worst had happened.

this is a great story, I was entertained.

I've never worked in my life.
I haven't had sharting experiences or anything similar since I was a kid. I wouldn't find hearing someone pissing while on the phone embarassing but I still wouldn't do it myself just in case the listener minds.

 

[waggy]

Client called to book the sound studio for a recording session. It was always in use so you had to call a couple months ahead of time. We agreed on a date about 3 months out and I wrote it on my calendar.

Unfortunately, my desk calendar was not the official reservation log. There was a separate wall calendar where studio bookings were kept, and I forgot to write it there.

So 3 months later on the fateful day, I go in, look at my desk calendar and see the note for the booking I made months ago. I wonder why I wrote a studio booking on my personal calendar. I go over to the "official" booking list for today and see a different group booked. This. Is. Very. Bad.

I run over to the manager and explain what happened. An empathetic sort, he told me that it was my problem and when the group I booked shows up, I needed to tell them I screwed up and they aren't going to be using the studio today or any other day for at least 2 months. And as a parting jab, he pointed out that it could hardly be worse since the client has almost certainly arranged to have studio musicians come in, and the client will have to pay them for the day no matter what. He figured the client will end up about $10K in the hole and we'll surely lose them as a client not to mention the bad word of mouth.

No doubt: 404 Continued employment not found.

So I try to call the client. Answering machine. I leave a short message asking him to call me ASAP.

At 8 AM the people that were "officially" booked arrive and set up in the studio. Nothing to do but wait for the crapstorm.

At 9:30 AM my client returns my call. I clear my throat and say, "Bob, about 3 months ago you called me to book our sound studio for today --"

Bob cuts me off and says, "DAMN, you're right. I forgot all about that. We cancelled that production and I forgot to call you. Just send me a bill for the studio fee. Hope there's no hard feelings." I said I would take care of it.

I tell the manager who says I'm the luckiest dude on the planet. He actually bills my client for half the fee and tells him he cut him a break for being such a good customer. The client is happy as can be.

So although it worked out, the 2 hours of sheer terror while I waited for my client and his entourage to show up, scream at me for an hour for costing them a fortune and delaying their production, and then get fired, was actually 90% as bad as if the worst had happened.

lol wow.

 

[Possessed Freak]

Part of my job is as a pseudo sound engineer. While this has happened at several places of more notoriety, it also happened where I was. Normally, when there is a large conference, my ass is parked at the mixing board to head off any disasters. We had a speaker using a lavalier microphone. Everything was going very well. The first session ended and we broke for lunch. 99% of the time I disable the input on the board so the speaker is not broadcasting, but of course this time I forget.

In the general chaos that is hundreds of people shuffling around, nobody could hear the microphone anyway. So the speaker leaves for a "personal break". Sure enough the sound dies down as people are in the lines for lunch. I am no longer in the sound booth and milling around. Suddenly I hear a loud flush over the sound system. I rush to the board just in time to cut off the feed as the person is going "ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh". Much hilarity ensues. Luckily for me, the speaker took full responsibility for the issue and said something along the lines of "Well, I have been doing presentations all my life, you would think I would know to check the darn transmitter is off."

 

[PingSpike]

Once I drank way to much coffee and wouldn't shut up in a UI design meeting.

 

[lokiju]

1st week at a new job, dumped a full extra large Dunkin Donuts on my lap on the way into work.

Diverted to a nearby Target and bought some cheap pants and was only slightly late but damn that sucked.

 

[Phokus]

There was that ATOTer, forgot his name, who accidentally peed on a vice president of his company (one he used to work for) and I think he even got moved under him again as a result, that was a funny thread!

 

[amdhunter]

Pee drop on my pants from leakage after not shaking well. Went to someones desk and she pointed it out.

I promptly said, if that was a pee stain, it'd be by my knees. :awe:

She was pretty too, and cool people. Anyone else, I'd have apologized or something. Still embarrassing.

 

[IndyColtsFan]

1st week at new job, dumped a full extra large Dunkin Donuts on my lap on the way into work.

Diverted to a nearby Target and bought some cheap pants and was only slightly late but damn that sucked.

I work in the sports industry and after the completion of a major sporting event, the team and I were driving home in a rented bus. We stopped to pick up lunch and trying to be good, I opted for a taco salad (aka naked burrito) at Qdoba. On the way home, we hit a bump and it flung the taco salad up and into my chest. Everyone on the bus was rolling in laughter.

 

[SphinxnihpS]

Work

 

[Harrod]

Sharting, and then walking down to a floor that was mostly occupied by woman to that bathroom to throw my underwear in the trash.

 

[Fritzo]

LOL- I've been following this thread, and just this morning I notice I wore two different shoes to work.

 

[Atomic Playboy]

I was working at a private school for the children of wealthy families; the median income was north of $250,000, with a healthy dose of CEOs and Presidents from local businesses represented. I came into work feeling a bit under the weather; no big deal, I figured it would break off after a couple hours. Unfortunately, it just got worse, and I developed a rapid fever. It was bad enough that I was almost passing out. My boss ordered me home (which was sensible), and I begrudgingly complied.

I get in my car, check my mirrors, throw the car into reverse, turn the wheel to the left and hear the sickening crunch of metal slamming into metal. Turns out that there is a brand new minivan sitting next to me that I somehow managed to overlook in my flu-induced hallucinations. I walk back into the office to grab some paper, leave a note and a number for the owner, and drive home (which, at that point, I probably was in no shape to do).

Turns out the van belonged to one of the trustees. Whoops. Fortunately she was very nice about the whole thing (probably because insurance footed the entire bill). But she'd occasionally come into our office and I'd have to duck my head in shame. Not only was it embarrassing, but it jacked my insurance rates for the next couple years. Double deuce.

There was also a time in college I was working paint crew in the summer months. A buddy and I had hoisted a 5 gallon bucket of 5770 (your typical eggshell white classroom color) onto the back of a golf cart and driven off to join the other student workers. Well, we didn't secure the paint, and the jolt from acceleration tipped the bucket over, where the paint proceeded to trickle out and leave a nice eggshell streak 100 yards long across the parking lot. Our bosses made us clean it up with wire brushes while everyone else was standing around drinking soda and laughing at us (we got through about 30 yards of it before they decided they'd let us blast it with a hose and call it good).

 

[clamum]

I never knew sharting was such a (relatively) common occurrence. :awe:

 

[amish]

had a BBQ at work. I was responsible for bringing the grills. things went off without a hitch. food was served and laughs were had. fast forward to the end of the day. I pack up my grills and clean up. I check my old coals and one grill had completely burned down while the other still had brickquettes in it that looked to either be fully consumed or out. So I check the coals by putting my hand on top of them...nothing. No heat and now my hand was covered in ash.

So I go about with dumping the old coals in a dumpster near by and drive home. About 1 hour later I get a text from a co-worker with a picture of a firetruck next to the dumpster...fuck. sure enough one coal was still hot and caught some refuse on fire. so I thought I was going to get canned for being such a dumbass or would have to pay the bill for the Fire Department for coming out. Luckily none of that happened, but the head partner didn't really talk to me going forward and I was never able to live it down while at that job.

 

[darom]

1. I had a co-worker who would always transfer the projects of editing/changing email servers settings onto his best friend. He never wanted to be blamed for screwing up.

One day during the lunch break, I vented my true feelings about his sorry ass to another admin. On the way out of the office, I realized that guy was sitting all along at his desk and heard my monologue. He had a puzzled look on his face with a jaw half-dropped. I felt really bad emotionally and apologized to him.

Funny, since then he still had never changed.

2. It had been one month at my new job. I scheduled ahead of time a router code upgrade, notified all the users via email and did a dozen of routers at the same time. I tested everything and felt really good when all circuits were up and running. When people came to work and hit their PCs, the whole campus network came to a slow halt. Some people connected to Internet and local servers just fine, some couldn't login at all. Very sporadic with no clue of what was going on.

My name was on that notification email, so I became a celebrity in an instant with all users calling me. Two hours into troubleshooting protocols, microwave connections etc., I found ONE damn duplex speed mismatch on a core router and a switch with over a million collisions! I think I lost a few pounds that day.

 

[IndyColtsFan]

I never knew sharting was such a (relatively) common occurrence. :awe:

I've never done it, but at my last job, a couple of my coworkers enjoyed going into each other's cubes and farting. Yes, you guessed it -- one guy chose poorly and as a result, shit himself and had to waddle to the bathroom to get cleaned up.

 

[ViviTheMage]

I worked at an Arboretum doing IT stuff ... and was called to one of the rented out conference rooms, did some work, had to go to the bathroom really bad, numero deuce, and sat down ... to realize that I was in the womans bathroom. I have never taken such a quiet shit in my life. Went through my head on how the hell I ended up in there, and sat there for a good hour or so, waiting for a break in traffic. Figured it was a good time, darted out as fast I could, only to have a women waiting outside the door of the bathroomw stare at me as I run by her ... she just laughs.

I realized what happened, that side of the building, they flipped the bathroom locations, usually it is men's womens coming out of an auditorium, but over there it was womens then mens. oy!

Ripped my pants at 8AM at the start of work, right down the ass ... cheap pants, sat there all day, and waited for everyone to leave so I could go last and not be seen, haha.

I can't say I have ever sharted at work ...

 

[lokiju]

Thought of another one.

Started a different job. Fist month working there and its around the holidays. The big boss takes us all out to dinner on his own dime.

We're sitting at this big round table and I'm eating some grilled shrimp and steak.

I bit into the shrimp and squeeze the tail to get that little bit of shell off that's always left on and somehow the perfect combination of events happened that caused the shrimp tail to pop clean off and shoot out like a rocket from between my fingers and directly across the table, hitting my co-worker right in his chest.

He said "what the fuck are you doing?" literally.

Was pretty embarrassed but everyone just laughed and moved on.

 

[Pulsar]

I have irritable bowel syndrome. It sucks. I ALWAYS have to be careful before I let one rip.

Once, at work, I was sitting in my cube with no one around and let one rip.

Completely liquid. The shart of all sharts.

I ran to the bathroom, which was two flights below me. Luckily I had black pants.

I grabbed a paper towl roll as I went by.

My underwear was ruined. That came off and got wrapped in a paper towel. Pants were not clean either - that was wiped with paper towel prodigously. I managed to get the pants clean with several sprints to the sink for water and soap. The underwear got thrown in the garbage.

I went commando for the rest of the day.

 

[SunnyD]

Back in college I had a job at a convenience store on graveyard shift. At about 2pm, the other person takes off for the night, leaving me alone till 6am, since it's usually ridiculously slow.

One night, I'm just not feeling it so I head back to the office and sit down for a minute. Next thing I know I'm being tapped on the shoulder by a CUSTOMER... uh, fuck? Yup, I dozed off for I don't know how long in the office with nobody behind the counter. Oops?

 

[IndyColtsFan]

Ripped my pants at 8AM at the start of work, right down the ass ... cheap pants, sat there all day, and waited for everyone to leave so I could go last and not be seen, haha.

Oh good lord, I forgot about that story! In 1998 or so, I went to a customer site in the Washington DC area. I ripped out my Dockers (yes, in the crotch). I didn't know WTF to do, so I grabbed a stapler and some tape off some guy's desk, went into the bathroom, and stapled and taped my pants shut and then clinched together as best I could the rest of the day. I don't think anyone caught on.

 

[Fritzo]

I have irritable bowel syndrome. It sucks. I ALWAYS have to be careful before I let one rip.

Once, at work, I was sitting in my cube with no one around and let one rip.

Completely liquid. The shart of all sharts.

I ran to the bathroom, which was two flights below me. Luckily I had black pants.

I grabbed a paper towl roll as I went by.

My underwear was ruined. That came off and got wrapped in a paper towel. Pants were not clean either - that was wiped with paper towel prodigously. I managed to get the pants clean with several sprints to the sink for water and soap. The underwear got thrown in the garbage.

I went commando for the rest of the day.

I had no idea Al Roker is a member here! Awesome!

 

[ViviTheMage]

Oh good lord, I forgot about that story! In 1998 or so, I went to a customer site in the Washington DC area. I ripped out my Dockers (yes, in the crotch). I didn't know WTF to do, so I grabbed a stapler and some tape off some guy's desk, went into the bathroom, and stapled and taped my pants shut and then clinched together as best I could the rest of the day. I don't think anyone caught on.

hahaha, awesome. Luckily I just sat down the entire day until it was time to head home ... it was a bd rip, crotch to top of back ass. Those pants were so cheap (target brand), haven't had that issue with my dockers.