What's the deal with white/Caucasian people putting their elderly in a nursing home?

[Dumac]

Asia in general places a higher emphasis on the family unit, as well as social cohesion, stemming from undercurrents of Confucian thought.

Western thought focuses on individualism.

 

[Ruptga]

I never really got it either, and then I met my Oma, my fiancee's totally insane grandmother. Living with her would literally be a full-time babysitting job, and that's not even feasible when both parents work full time. Fortunately Opa is still quite sane and functional, and Oma will probably die first.

Personally, I don't think I'd mind having an elderly parent live with me so long as they're sane enough to be functional. Physical limitations are so much easier to deal with than mental, especially if they're not all that physically limited; add in the fact that there's not much of a person left to care for and the costs begin to outweigh the benefits.

 

[JEDIYoda]

Bullshit. Judge others like most people here on ATOT? For example the black comments?

Just an FYI, Asians would rather adjust their work schedules or get a new job so their mothers or fathers or whomever were taken care of all the time.

Asian people are not all that great...you should have titled this thread.....
You americans suck when it cdomes to taking care of the elderly!!!

 

[Locut0s]

Mainly because our culture places such a great emphasis on personal space and privacy. Asian cultures and many European cultures place this same emphasis on the family unit. It's a cultural shift that seems cruel from an Asian perspective perhaps but the Asian culture is one that seems suffocating from a Western perspective. Instead of looking at it as "putting grandma" away in a home one needs to look at it more from the perspective of all parties wanting to keep their highly valued privacy and personal space. This can often only be achieved in ones old age by going into a care facility. Remember grandma and grandpa are part of that western culture too and want their own privacy and more often than not would not want to be looked after by family!

It's a paradigm shift that you have to make to understand both sides.

 

[bwoody2016]

Asia in general places a higher emphasis on the family unit, as well as social cohesion, stemming from undercurrents of Confucian thought.

Western thought focuses on individualism.

Best answer in this thread. Even though the title opened up pandora's box of racism.

 

[Zebo]

Because putting a bullet in their heads is illegal?

White = da debil everyone knows this.

 

[santz]

There are really really reaaaaaallly poor people all around the world, who cannot afford for a parent to live with them. but they will never ever consider sending them to a nursing home.

Culture here is very self oriented. "Its all about me & my american dream" kind.
You know....convertible, hot girl, money- thats all its come down to now

 

[TruePaige]

Bunch of racists in this thread, making fun of white people like they are all the same.

 

[guyver01]

You think putting them in a nursing home is bad? Try being an Inuit... they stick 'em on a raft and float 'em out to sea.

 

[JackOfHearts]

Nursing homes extend life no comment on quality but it does extend life... All the the push towards home health is a cost saving measure because people die faster at home.... Keeping Grandma at home with you when most people have no medical experience is a great way to kill them... Which is safer; staying in a controlled environment, with all your medicine safely managed and your condition monitored by professionals around the clock, or sleeping in a spare room with a check to see if your still breathing in the morning? Home health is a joke 1 nurse visit a week and an aide for 1 hour a day...
But you love grandma cause she is at home with you. You want her to live as long as possible put her in a good long term care facility, do you research pick a medicare 5 star place. Stop by after work stay in contact with staff it is safer then home... Anyways I have rambled on for a bit, but nursing homes are not the hell holes people think they are....

 

[StageLeft]

Because old people are crap.

Anyway, I've seen some commercials and honestly some old folks' homes (probably the pricier ones) look pretty decent to be honest. Like back to university dorm and if you've got viagara and don't mind screwing a 70 year old I hear some people get a lot of strange in these places.

 

[mmntech]

Cost and access to medical care are too big ones. Long term care offers on demand health by trained professionals. They know about the meds they need to take,etc. There's also a cultural aspect. Westerners, especially the older generations, put a much higher value on independent living than other cultures do. I know my grandma won't leave her house come hell or high water. My other grandma lives in a seniors community. These places allow them to maintain their own private space yet have access to professional care if needed. For that generation, a lot of them fear becoming a burden on ther families. It's not necessarily that ther familes are uncaring. I know a lot of white boomers that take care if their elderly parents.

Another thing to keep in mind is simple demographics. Boomers are getting older and don't have the energy to take care of them, especially if they need constant care. Their kids have families of their own that take all their time. With two working parents, it's hard to make time.

 

[nageov3t]

it's going to be interesting to see what happens with the elderly in Japan considering how quickly the country is graying.

 

[marvdmartian]

Well, duh! We do it so we have more time to be racist!!



My 82 year old mother went into a nursing home about 6 months ago. Do I hate it? Yes!

But since my oldest sister and Dad passed away already, my older sister works full time to make ends meet, and my brother and I (who also work full time) are clear across the country from Mom, it really was the only feasible solution.

Mom lost the ability to walk on her own, even with a walker, and is confined to a wheel chair. My sis and my mother shared an apartment until 6 months ago, but it's definitely not set up for someone in a wheel chair, and such a place (so far as I know) does not exist in that area (or, at least, is set up for seniors only, and my sister wouldn't be able to live there). Add to that the fact that Mom would need someone to be with her pretty much 24 hours a day, to help her out with everything, and a nursing home was really the only place that could offer that.

Medicare doesn't offer 24 hour nursing for more than a couple months. They also don't pay for nursing homes (which is inane.....it's set up for seniors! hello??). There's no way we could afford 24 hour nursing, and none of us is married, so there's no spouses or adult grandkids to take care of Mom (my oldest sister's kids also live far away). Mom literally needs someone there to accomplish any physical movement, and can pretty much only lay in bed or sit in a chair (thank God she still has her mental facilities and is able to take care of herself otherwise!!).

As it is, Mom had to go on Medicaid in order to pay for this nursing home, after paying for the first 4 months on her own.......over $45,000!! Now she's taken care of, has someone to help her out with that stuff she can't do on her own, and is working on trying to build up her leg strength again with physical therapy (though the best she'll probably hope for is short walks with a walker).

I HATE the fact that I can't do more for my mother, and if anything feasible was possible, I'd do it. But the fact of the matter is that I'm 1500 miles away, and there's no way I could move closer to her without cutting my paycheck in half (or less)......so really wouldn't be doing anyone any good doing that. I take a little comfort in knowing that she's in one of the best places she can be, with people who care and are taking care of her. I also come home every 3-4 months and visit for a week, which is the best I can do under the circumstances. Mom is better taken care of where she is than I could ever do for her, and is adjusting to the situation.

So please.......don't lump people into a stereotype. It makes you just as racist as you claim we are. :thumbsdown:

 

[JackOfHearts]

If you think Japan is gonna be a mess think China with the one baby per family rule... Also add in the cultural desire for a male child and 2020 35 million plus men with no chance at a women to marry... They are gonna be a mess trying to handle their graying population. like 20 grays for each worker for a while, but they have to where with all to just kill off the elderly there....

 

[Hayabusa Rider]

The reason is fairly obvious. You have 23 asians living in a home so the middle generation can work 80 hours a week so the youngest can have gold chains and pimped out M3's.

The seniors? They send them out on old bicycles with big plastic bags to rummage through the trash for recyclables.

It's a perfect system.

 

[StageLeft]

The reason is fairly obvious. You have 23 asians living in a home so the middle generation can work 80 hours a week so the youngest can have gold chains and pimped out M3's.

The seniors? They send them out on old bicycles with big plastic bags to rummage through the trash for recyclables.

It's a perfect system.

haha

 

[Hayabusa Rider]

haha

The best thing about it is that it's literally true.

I used to live in Quincy, MA which probably has an asian majority by now. In all seriousness they were nice enough, but to no one's surprise they kept to their own ethnic group. Natural enough and I'm not bitching about it.

Around 2002 real estate prices had increased fivefold and we started to see groups of two dozen or so buy these homes and this is EXACTLY what happened. We would have to wait until we heard the garbage trucks come along before we put out the trash because the old people rode around all day on rusty bikes that someone must have thrown out with huge bags full hundreds of plastic bottles and aluminum cans. We never saw the parents because they were out working constantly.

The kids? They had a couple thousand dollars of gold chains and tried to look as ghetto as possible, complete with spinner rims and eleventy billion watt amps pumping out the worst rap ever.

If you ever say "Napoleon Dynamite", remember what Skip looked like towards the end of the movie.

That's just how it was, and it was repeated on every block.

Amazing.

 

[waffleironhead]

Nice racist thread.

 

[bignateyk]

Nice racist thread.

How is it racist? It's a sociological trend. I'm white, and it's pretty obvious that this is the truth. My parents are pretty loaded, so I don't think i'll have to worry about making this decision. My guess is they will just hire a full-time nurse when the time comes.

 

[MJinZ]

The best thing about it is that it's literally true.

I used to live in Quincy, MA which probably has an asian majority by now. In all seriousness they were nice enough, but to no one's surprise they kept to their own ethnic group. Natural enough and I'm not bitching about it.

Around 2002 real estate prices had increased fivefold and we started to see groups of two dozen or so buy these homes and this is EXACTLY what happened. We would have to wait until we heard the garbage trucks come along before we put out the trash because the old people rode around all day on rusty bikes that someone must have thrown out with huge bags full hundreds of plastic bottles and aluminum cans. We never saw the parents because they were out working constantly.

The kids? They had a couple thousand dollars of gold chains and tried to look as ghetto as possible, complete with spinner rims and eleventy billion watt amps pumping out the worst rap ever.

If you ever say "Napoleon Dynamite", remember what Skip looked like towards the end of the movie.

That's just how it was, and it was repeated on every block.

Amazing.

Quincy is Boston's China City. 15% Asian in 2000, maybe 25-30% now.

 

[waffleironhead]

How is it racist? It's a sociological trend. I'm white, and it's pretty obvious that this is the truth. My parents are pretty loaded, so I don't think i'll have to worry about making this decision. My guess is they will just hire a full-time nurse when the time comes.

Ive been to multiple nursing facilities and the residents span the rainbow of races. Pointing this out to be a solely Caucasian thing is racist or merely ignorant.