what does it mean if a guy is quiet (reserved?)

[Dear Summer]

Locked at OP's request


esquared
Anandtech Senior Moderator

 

[Shawn]

?

 

[keird]

What's the context? Is he reading a book or a a greeter at WalMart?

 

[Drakkon]

Clearly he must be plotting something

 

[keird]

I should have quoted the OP. Damn.

 

[marvdmartian]

It might mean he's doing everything in his power to NOT say what's on his mind!!

 

[Dear Summer]

Originally posted by: keird
What's the context? Is he reading a book or a a greeter at WalMart?

in social settings

 

[effowe]

I usually tend to think they are weird or something is wrong with them, but I have had friends like this so sometimes all it takes is for you to get to know them before they open up.

 

[keird]

Maybe he's expecting you to entertain him. Do you look like a clown?

 

[Xstatic1]

OP - r u asking because u know u're quiet and reserved? or did someone comment that u're quet and reserved and wondering what they meant?

 

[Dear Summer]

Originally posted by: Xstatic1
OP - r u asking because u know u're quiet and reserved? or did someone comment that u're quet and reserved and wondering what they meant?

kind of both

what is your perception of quiet guys from a female's perspective?

 

[PieIsAwesome]

It means they are quiet/reserved.

 

[sandorski]

Thinking of best ways of killing everyone. If you hear him say, "Eureka!"(or a close approximation), get out of there.

 

[Newbian]

Thinking how the hot women nearby would look with her dress next to the bed.

 

[Modular]

Originally posted by: Dear Summer

Originally posted by: Xstatic1
OP - r u asking because u know u're quiet and reserved? or did someone comment that u're quet and reserved and wondering what they meant?

kind of both

what is your perception of quiet guys from a female's perspective?

I don't know as I'm a male. Is this person someone that you're dating?

There are a myriad of reasons that a guy might be quiet. It could be that he is thinking about work, drinking, sex, food, video games; it could be that you're not entertaining. It could be that there's something heavy on his mind ie. family member sick, job sucks etc.

All the above can contribute to quietness. If it's that he's quiet all the time then it could just be that you need to get to know him before he opens up or that he has social anxiety and just doesn't want to/know how to be himself.

 

[xSauronx]

Originally posted by: sandorski
Thinking of best ways of killing everyone. If you hear him say, "Eureka!"(or a close approximation), get out of there.

bingo. "he was such a quiet guy, never bothered everyone, i didnt see it coming"

 

[waffleironhead]

As a quiet person myself, let me chime in.
Most social conversations are not worth joining in. They move fast and are fairly shallow. When you take the time to listen more than you talk, you actually learn something(not always of course, but sometimes you hit gold). There is always a surplus of people who think their opinion needs to be shared. There are fewer people who are content to let the conversations go round and round without chiming in. Being quiet and reserved is usually a sign of someone who is observant. It does not mean they do not have an opinion, quite the opposite actually, they just do not feel the need to share it with the world.

 

[waffleironhead]

Originally posted by: xSauronx

Originally posted by: sandorski
Thinking of best ways of killing everyone. If you hear him say, "Eureka!"(or a close approximation), get out of there.

bingo. "he was such a quiet guy, never bothered everyone, i didnt see it coming"

The killer has a different view.
"They were a quiet family, so unsuspecting."

 

[Zeeky Boogy Doog]

I definitely fall under the quiet/reserved category, but it's usually because I find the people I'm with boring and I'm about a thousand miles away in my mind at a place far more interesting. Of course once you get a few drinks in me, I tend to be unable to make that thousand mile trip and become much more talkative.

 

[Flipped Gazelle]

Originally posted by: xSauronx

Originally posted by: sandorski
Thinking of best ways of killing everyone. If you hear him say, "Eureka!"(or a close approximation), get out of there.

bingo. "he was such a quiet guy, never bothered everyone, i didnt see it coming"

Jeffrey Dahmer?

 

[Dear Summer]

Originally posted by: Modular

Originally posted by: Dear Summer

Originally posted by: Xstatic1
OP - r u asking because u know u're quiet and reserved? or did someone comment that u're quet and reserved and wondering what they meant?

kind of both

what is your perception of quiet guys from a female's perspective?

I don't know as I'm a male. Is this person someone that you're dating?

There are a myriad of reasons that a guy might be quiet. It could be that he is thinking about work, drinking, sex, food, video games; it could be that you're not entertaining. It could be that there's something heavy on his mind ie. family member sick, job sucks etc.

All the above can contribute to quietness. If it's that he's quiet all the time then it could just be that you need to get to know him before he opens up or that he has social anxiety and just doesn't want to/know how to be himself.

more towards the latter
any way to learn how to be himself?

 

[Dear Summer]

I kind of see it as a social skills deficiency so I'm wondering if this view is shared

 

[PrinceofWands]

Originally posted by: Dear Summer

Originally posted by: Modular

Originally posted by: Dear Summer

Originally posted by: Xstatic1
OP - r u asking because u know u're quiet and reserved? or did someone comment that u're quet and reserved and wondering what they meant?

kind of both

what is your perception of quiet guys from a female's perspective?

I don't know as I'm a male. Is this person someone that you're dating?

There are a myriad of reasons that a guy might be quiet. It could be that he is thinking about work, drinking, sex, food, video games; it could be that you're not entertaining. It could be that there's something heavy on his mind ie. family member sick, job sucks etc.

All the above can contribute to quietness. If it's that he's quiet all the time then it could just be that you need to get to know him before he opens up or that he has social anxiety and just doesn't want to/know how to be himself.

more towards the latter
any way to learn how to be himself?

Understand that some people are simply that way. Introverts, and various other personality factors contribute to some people just being that way. There's nothing wrong with it, it isn't a dysfunction, and it doesn't need 'fixing'...it's who they truly are. Don't know in this specific case of course, but it's something to understand and accept in general.

 

[PrinceofWands]

Originally posted by: Dear Summer
I kind of see it as a social skills deficiency so I'm wondering if this view is shared

Nope, not from a psychological standpoint. There's nothing 'right' or 'healthy' about outgoing, extroverted, talkative people. Nothing wrong with them either, it's just who/what they are.

 

[Xstatic1]

Originally posted by: Dear Summer

Originally posted by: Xstatic1
OP - r u asking because u know u're quiet and reserved? or did someone comment that u're quet and reserved and wondering what they meant?

kind of both

what is your perception of quiet guys from a female's perspective?

u already pegged it:

Originally posted by: Dear Summer
I kind of see it as a social skills deficiency so I'm wondering if this view is shared