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Wedding things - registry list, how to reduce costs, etc

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MagnusTheBrewer said:
No one ever looked back at a wedding and said, "I sure am glad we spent that extra $$$$"
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Depends on what you use that extra money for. If it's for flowers, then probably not. But if you use that extra 10k to turn your wedding into a fucking rager, then maybe.
 
Thing is, most people see wedding invite & automatically think the words "obligated" & "fund raiser" Heck a lot of folks hold destination weddings knowing that many won't be able to come but will send a check along with their regrets.

People need to remember that at a wedding, the comfort & consideration towards your guests is most important! My wedding was cheap but within my means & put the needs of our guests first. No cash bar, no charging admission tickets or doing money dances at the reception. We had good booze, plenty of beer, wine & soda. We had the Chinese dinner & all guests invited to the after party.

I see people inviting folks to big church weddings but not inviting them to the reception or worse, holding a sit down dinner reception for some guests, followed by a cocktails & snacks reception for others. Absolutely atrocious etiquette!

You have a guest list of over 100 people? Cut costs where you can, get married off season, see if you can marry in the rectory with just intimate family & throw the money on a reception but don't cheap out on the obligation to be great hosts. Remember, this day is actually the first time you & your wife will entertaining as a married couple. Don't cut corners on the comfort of your guests! A dry wedding? Not popular but doable, just beer, wine & a champagne toast? Totally acceptable. A morning wedding with breakfast, mimosas & champagne? Great! An early afternoon wedding with substantial apps & cake served instead of a sit down dinner? A marvelous idea. You guests must be fed, given something to drink, not left to sit outside in the scorching heat, not left fighting for chairs.

Think about your duties as host & plan with your guests in mind. It might well be that mother in law needs to be politely put in her place, cut the guest list off at 100, she gets 65, you two get your 35 friends. You already sound like you aren't looking forward to one of the biggest days of your life & that isn't right. Your wife to be must talk things over with you & agree to present a united front with her mother. If MIL isn't onboard, save your money & hold the wedding you can afford. If your wife to be caves & sides with her mom, you have a picture of exactly what your marriage is going to look like.
 
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A morning wedding with breakfast, mimosas & champagne? Great!
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This is how we cut costs - we did a morning wedding on a Sunday, followed by buffet brunch w/ unlimited mimosas. That's at least a 5k savings over a Saturday night wedding with dinner and alcohol.
 
Ns1 said:
Depends on what you use that extra money for. If it's for flowers, then probably not. But if you use that extra 10k to turn your wedding into a fucking rager, then maybe.
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We heard reports of epic hangovers after our wedding, a successful rager indeed. Everyone present was a close friend & it was so much fun! I had compliments on everything.
 
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Ns1 said:
This is how we cut costs - we did a morning wedding on a Sunday, followed by buffet brunch w/ unlimited mimosas. That's at least a 5k savings over a Saturday night wedding with dinner and alcohol.
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It sounds lovely & relaxed!
 
Geekbabe said:
Thing is, most people see wedding invite & automatically think the words "obligated" & "fund raiser" Heck a lot of folks hold destination weddings knowing that many won't be able to come but will send a check along with their regrets.
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Wife grew up under the rule of no attendance no gift. Personally, I always /shrug like I don't know the official rules.
 
We had ours on a Friday so the site fee was about 30% cheaper. I splurged on photography cause it is what I considered most important. Our flowers weren't too expensive since we had an outdoor wedding so we let the natural scenery speak for itself. Alcohol was based on consumption (open bar) and our guests did a lot less damage than we thought they would. Also, saved a couple hundred with my $10 Amazon tungsten band compared to buying in store.

Gotta say, if I was ever doing it again, it'd be city hall and a catered BBQ picnic after.
 
Could save money by not getting married. As Stanhope put it, would you invent marriage if it didn't exist? "Baby what we have is so good that we should get the govt involved"
 
We had a dry wedding on my wife's grandparents' farm. My MIL still managed to jack up the cost. We just wanted a potluck but she insisted on a caterer.
 
IronWing said:
We had a dry wedding on my wife's grandparents' farm. My MIL still managed to jack up the cost. We just wanted a potluck but she insisted on a caterer.
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That was a significant cost reduction for us too. The wife didn't want it and there was no way that we could afford to pay for 20 of my friends drink anyway. Damned sots.
 
also, saved a couple hundred with my $10 Amazon tungsten band compared to buying in store.
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amazing how many guys I see wearing the same amazon ring - me too buddy. I actually have 2 because I lost my first one the day after we got married and found it again a week later.
 
Meh, I spent $150 on the engagement ring and I told her there's no way we are spending more than $2-3k on a wedding. I'd rather spend the money on a good honeymoon. Being in love shouldn't matter how much you spend.
 
If I heard a wedding I was supposed to go to was a dry wedding, I would either not go or my gift budget would drop significantly.

And if it was a dry wedding, it would be someone that I am not close to really anyways because I am not close with any boring people who don't drink or wouldn't want their guests who do drink to not drink at their wedding. So it's not even a realistic scenario.
 
highland145 said:
lol no it doesn't. My wife/in-laws aren't drinkers. People don't have to show up or give gifts. I would hope that most people don't get married for the gifts anyway.
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I mean sure that's a general rule, if you and your friends don't drink then it's a moot point. But if your friends DO drink and you knowingly have a dry wedding, then yeah dry wedding = "fuck your guests".
 
Ns1 said:
I mean sure that's a general rule, if you and your friends don't drink then it's a moot point. But if your friends DO drink and you knowingly have a dry wedding, then yeah dry wedding = "fuck your guests".
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I agree that it's a dick move if you're doing it to save a few dollars. My friends do drink but I only had about 30 people there, including family. Some of them had already been paid in beer for "who's married 1st" bet. They knew up front that it was going to be dry and I wouldn't have been offended if they stayed home.
 
Ns1 said:
amazing how many guys I see wearing the same amazon ring - me too buddy. I actually have 2 because I lost my first one the day after we got married and found it again a week later.
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Haha, yea. I had to pick up a new one recently cause of some weight loss. Damn thing was $20 this time around! 😱
 
Reduce costs by not getting married. Women are way more trouble than they are worth. Just rent what you need and keep your shit.
 
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