I run my q9550 at 3.4 as well. I have an asus P5q-e and 2x2gb of corsair ddr2-1066
8.5x400
1066 ram 5-5-5-15 2t
1.25v vcore
1.82 vdimm
1.12 fsb term
1.12 northbridge
all other volts set manually to lowest
c1e off
eist off
spread spectrum off
coretemps 57c full load with prime95 (xigmatek s12383 dark knight and arctic silver 5)
I felt the q9550 ran too hot at STOCK with the stock intel cooler, but good luck
In answer to your questions...
1. find your vid with realtemp and try the default voltage for your cpu. Test with prime95
2. set your ram to its recommended voltage settings
3. keep ram at its default speed
4. fsb will be 1600 at 3.4. you can set ram speed seperate from this
5. lock pci-e for sure
6. try lowest voltages first for sb and nb, you can raise nb if needed (sb will not be necessary)
7. set your ram timings to what corsair recommends manually