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-update- I am back "home", sort of... still seeking advice

I

IDoNotKnow

Junior Member
I eventually went home alter that day to see if I could talk to them as I said I was going to do. However, as I started "First, don't lay a finger on me now or ever again...", mom interupts me and says "Oh, so you're bringing that up again. Good for you. You come back here thinking you're right still..." Well I knew then this was pointless. Not to mention the fact I believe they didn't bother looking for me or trying to find out I was. They saw me outside and just smuggly waited till I rang the doorbell.

So I left. WTF else was I supposed to do? I had nowhere to go though. So I called the cops as people suggested. I asked if I could get taken to the police station or at least some type of shelter. Theyre response? "Theres tons of homeless people out there. Go find some cardboard."

...

I then decide to head to the local church as suggested but no one was there adn it was closed. Not good. So I wandered aroudn aimlessly at night. I probably walked over 6 miles barefoot... My foot is sore and bleeding, and it was getting really really cold. Eventually I was too tired to move anymore, so I tried to settle down by the back of some building and fall asleep. Yeah, well it was too cold, I was shivering so I tried to find better shelter. I eventually wandered to an elevator for a newly contructed building, so I just stayed in there the entire night. I coudln't sleep still... way too cold.

So here I am, morning. I walk all the way back "home", thinking I'll get my stuff when they leave for work. Keep in mind, I have no idea of the time or anything and I look messed up and still freezing cold. Just my luck, they see me outside when they are about to leave. They tell me "come here," but I say "No, not until you listen to what I have to say." So she laughs and leaves for work.

I invade the house (house key in the back), take a hot shower (i feel sick), and change clothes and get some shoes now that they are gone. But what should I do now?

Obviously nothing has changed or will change. But I really really want to finish school, that has been my #1 priority in life. So that I can get an education, get a job, and then leave them and never see them again. It's basically a gamble w/ my current life for my future life. What do you guys think?



(Mods, I created another account because I wish to remain anonymous to the people who know me real life in these boards. Please excuse.)

I don't know what to do. Should I just die? WTF can i do?
What am I supposed to do?

I just ran away from home. I am at my friends place who knows some of what goes on.

I can't take it anymore. I hate my parents. I can't live with them. I don't want to see them ever again. I don't want them to die, I don't want to wish them ill... I just don't want them ever involved with me again.

But what am I supposed to do?

I have no money. No keys. No car. Whatever.
I just ran away, I had no times to get shoes. My toe is bleeding from running barefoot.

I blew up over something small. I know I've been at fault numerous times. But this was just the last straw for me. I can't handle it, we're just not compatible.

I've been hit since I was young. Got books, pencils, cups, water, shoes, wood, whatever is nearby thrown at me. I've never hit back and never would because that would bring me to their level. I am better than them. I've been chased wiht a chair, a bat, and what not. I remember when I was young I got pissed and I just walked off. When they told me to come back, I said they woudl hit me. They promise dhtey would not... I got beat. THey f*ckin lie always. I hate them.

I have never had anyone to protect me. My parents always side together, I am always wrong. I've never once recieved an apology from them in my entire life. I have no attachment to them emotionally, never talk about that stuff. I appreciate the food and shelter, monetary wise they have always been wiling to support me. I plan on paying every cent back to them (even now still), but emotionally I hate them and despise them.

I've seen a psychologist once anonymously without my parents knowing. I wondered if this was all my fault. I mean, they are only human. She was nice but honestly, it doesnt change the situation I am in so nothing she can do can help. Nobody can help.

What am I going to do? I can't stay with my friends forever. I can't support myself. Should I just die? Live out on the street till I starve to death or something. Suicide? I won't do that, I don't have the will power to.

What can I do. I don't want my parents arrested. I don't want anything bad to happen to them. I hate them, but they're just stupid and don't know right... can't help it if they think the way they do. I tried. I asked for an apology.. she woudln't give it.. then my dad got pissed off for me demanding one and threatened my life. I ran. What else am I supposed to do? Hes not going to kill me, but I dont want to get hit.

I can't go back home. I've ran away before and came back. But nothings ever changed. I'm always at fault. My parents are catholic, but where does it say they can beat their child?

I'm so scared. I'm crying. I dont know what to do.

Do NOT do anything to my parents. Do NOT do anything to me. I will kill myself if any of that were to happen. I hate life, but I wish to live... but not if I cause trouble for others like my parents. I'm sorry.





 
I have a nice, warm place for you to sleep. 😀

Seriously though, you need to get help. Call churches, "rescue" missions, etc...
 
If this is real, go to a police station and tell them the story. They can take you to family services in the morning and they will place you into foster care.
 
how old are you? if 18+, get a job at a factory and chill at a friend's place until you have enough for a security deposit on an uber-cheap apartment.
 
Holy sh!t.... I seriously don't know what to do in your situation... 🙁
I really would try to find someone to talk to.. I know you don't want anything to happen to your parents, but based on what you said, something seriously needs to happen to them. I'm not sure if this is a good idea, but I would try talking to the police or some helpline about this.

Good luck man :beer:🙁
 
If you're < 18 than I suggest you go home. If you're 18 or older, get a job, go to school, and move out.

Do you have grandparents? Do you have relatives that would let you live there? Find other options. I know for a fact without a job, you cannot depend on your friends' houses. They'll eventually get pissed off at you for leeching and get really irritated and more than likely kick you out.

Good luck my friend.
 
how old are you? you have no shoes on? You went without taking shoes? Are you in the US or Pakistan?

KK
 
I do not want my parents arrested or anything bad to happen to them. I can't go to the police, that would cause trouble. I dont want to harm them.

I have tried talking to someone. I tried talking to a psychologist, but I jsut left eventually... nothing she can do to help me.

I RAN out of the hosue! THere was no time for shoes. He was chasing me.

I am over 18, but I have nothing with me. No wallet, no money, no car, nothing. No time for any of that. I have no personal possesion, my parents have always been invading my life, I never had privacy.
 
Originally posted by: DainBramaged
I have a nice, warm place for you to sleep. 😀

Seriously though, you need to get help. Call churches, "rescue" missions, etc...
Click to expand...

Originally posted by: ScottyB
If this is real, go to a police station and tell them the story. They can take you to family services in the morning and they will place you into foster care.
Click to expand...


what they said
 
Have you considered joining the armed forces?

-Three meals a day (generally)
-shelter (generally)
-a purpose
-a paycheck
-a community

I say generally because in the field you may or may not get food and someplace nice ("nice" being defined by being dry/warm) to sleep. But, if you are a pacifist, or dont want to risk your @ss in Iraq, its probably not for you.
 
Originally posted by: IDoNotKnow
I do not want my parents arrested or anything bad to happen to them. I can't go to the police, that would cause trouble. I dont want to harm them.

I have tried talking to someone. I tried talking to a psychologist, but I jsut left eventually... nothing she can do to help me.
Click to expand...

why would that harm them? they doing something illegal.... or bad to u? put it this way... there isn't an easy answer to this. someone is going to get hurt.
 
I respect your choice to not do your parents harm, but seriously, if what you said was true, they really need a lesson.

Well, then the next thing is that you need to find somewhere to stay. I don't know who to talk to about find foster homes or something, but keep looking around.

 
I will tell you one thing, until you stick up to your parents, they will always do this to you. I have first hand knowledge.
 
Originally posted by: ScottyB
If this is real, go to a police station and tell them the story. They can take you to family services in the morning and they will place you into foster care.
Click to expand...

Originally posted by: Mookow
Have you considered joining the armed forces?

-Three meals a day (generally)
-shelter (generally)
-a purpose
-a paycheck
-a community

I say generally because in the field you may or may not get food and someplace nice ("nice" being defined by being dry/warm) to sleep. But, if you are a pacifist, or dont want to risk your @ss in Iraq, its probably not for you.
Click to expand...

^
 
You're over 18, did you just graduate last year, what are you doing now, job, college, smoking dope?

KK

Edit: I can't spell
 
Let me take a guess. By any chance you are Asian?

With that aside, I can somewhat understand your dilemma. Sometimes you hate your parents so much for what they do but you're still tied to them by blood so you wish them no harm regardless of what they ever did to you. If you're under the age of 18, there isn't much you CAN do but I highly suggest you try to stay away from home if it has gotten to this point. Your only viable option is to depend on someone else who you can trust and is 18+ years old. Your first option should be to try to contact an older sibling or relative if possible. See if they can take you in for a bit until things settle down and get sorted. Your last option of course is to depend on a friend but that'll be difficult depending on how caring and accepting your friends' parents are. If they are willing to take you in for awhile, accept their generosity but realize it is only a short term solution.

Now if you're 18+ years old, you have a lot more options financially. Ask your friend if you can stay for awhile and during that time, find a part time job (since you are probably going to school). You are also old enough to take out a small loan to help you get started on moving out. Of course you may also have older friends who have their own place to let you stay over for awhile.

That's pretty much all I can think of for now. Just take it easy and realize it WILL get better no matter how doomed the situation may be. Goodluck.
 
The suggestion about the armed forces is a good one. Contact a local church (or a few, it might take a few) and tell them your situation, ask them if there's anyone in their congregation who would be willing to take you in in return for help around the house and such (often older people could use a hand and have a spare bedroom) and then get yourself a job, even if it's at McDonald's for a while.

Sorry that life hurts so much sometimes. 🙁

*hug*
 
Originally posted by: IDoNotKnow
I do not want my parents arrested or anything bad to happen to them. I can't go to the police, that would cause trouble. I dont want to harm them.

I have tried talking to someone. I tried talking to a psychologist, but I jsut left eventually... nothing she can do to help me.

I RAN out of the hosue! THere was no time for shoes. He was chasing me.

I am over 18, but I have nothing with me. No wallet, no money, no car, nothing. No time for any of that. I have no personal possesion, my parents have always been invading my life, I never had privacy.
Click to expand...

Why if someone is so terrible would you care if they're arrested? They need to be held responsible for their actions just like everyone else.

Anyway you're 18 and they're horrible so why are you still living there?

Why isn't college possible? Work and loans and you can do it.

My advice would be to get a police escort to the house tomorrow to collect your belongings and crash at friends for a week or so while you either join the armed forces, get schooling straightened out, or get a job and get your own place.
 
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