This is gonna hurt me more than it hurts you..............

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Ulfwald

Moderator Emeritus<br>Elite Member
May 27, 2000
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#26
My dad always used to say &quot;You had better straighten up or I'll knock you into next week!&quot;

My biggest mistake was when I was 16 and thought I wasto big to get my but beat.......WRONG ANSWER>.....He said that to me one time and I smarted off right back at him....&quot;Good! &quot;Cause this week sucks anyway&quot; needless to say, I didn't land until Sunday, and it was only monday.
 

compuwiz1

Admin Emeritus Elite Member
Oct 9, 1999
26,459
159
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#27
Now you've done it, you're grounded for life!!

That only lasted until about 7:pm the closest saturday night. :D
 

Redwingsguy

Diamond Member
Jan 6, 2000
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#28
The one I heard too often was &quot;If you masturbate too often you will go blind!!&quot; :D
 

Format C:

Elite Member
Oct 9, 1999
1,662
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#30
I'm surprised nobody has posted the number one answer...

&quot;As long as you live under my roof...&quot;
 

compuwiz1

Admin Emeritus Elite Member
Oct 9, 1999
26,459
159
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#31
About 10:05 pm, I could here my mother yelling, Steeeeeevvvvvvveeeeee!!!!! Get your A$$ home!!!
That must have followed the T.V. campagn about &quot;It's 10:00, do you know where your children are?&quot; :)
 

Outfits

Senior member
Oct 12, 1999
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#32
If I've told you once I've told you a million times... I know there are others but this is the only that comes to mind right now.
 

unxpurg8d

Golden Member
Apr 7, 2000
1,373
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#33
My mom and Russ's mom must've gone to the same parenting classes. Mom was always saying &quot;you touch that one more time and I'll rip your arm off and beat you over the head with it!&quot;. Of course we knew she wouldn't - at least not in public. :D
 

SUOrangeman

Diamond Member
Oct 12, 1999
8,361
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#34
I really hate to play into ethnic/racial stereotypes, but I can tell that almost none of you watched/remember the Cosby Show religiously. And even if there was a Black household in the country that never saw an episode, I can almost gaurantee that the following phrase has been uttered at least once in ever one of those households:

&quot;I brought you into this world, and I can take you out!&quot;

Thankfully, I first heard this on the Cosby Show and only jokingly ever since.

-SUO
 
Feb 2, 2000
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#35
How about &quot;Don't pick at it, it will scar&quot; or my fathers favorite, &quot;If I have to pull this car over, I'm knocking heads!&quot; Of course he never would, but he liked to threaten it! :D
 
Oct 9, 1999
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#36
yeah, the ones in the car are always great. there are several variations on the &quot;if i have to stop this car&quot; or &quot;i'll turn this car around&quot; spiel.
 

unxpurg8d

Golden Member
Apr 7, 2000
1,373
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#37
SUOrangeman, you mean telling my kids &quot;I think abortion should be made retroactive&quot; is a BAD thing? :p~~~~~~ (There goes that &quot;Mother of the Year&quot; award. Drats.)
 

dennilfloss

Past Lifer 1957-2014 In Memoriam
Oct 21, 1999
30,550
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dennilfloss.blogspot.com
#38
Turn down the f..king base! God I hate Zeppelin! :D (My folks hated Whole Lotta Love)

Are you sure that strange smell coming from your room is only incense and patchouli? I'd swear something is burning in there! (There was indeed) <Pffffffffffffffft!!! Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!>

Why do you only bring girls to your room? Don't you have any male friends? Why is it always dark in there? You need more that a black light to see what you're doing! (No, I didn't) ;)

When will you cut your damn hair? It's down below your butt now. (Hey! My idol is Ian Gillan!)

I swear I'm gonna burn that jean jacket.

LMAO

Smoke On The Water (Deep Purple)




 

compuwiz1

Admin Emeritus Elite Member
Oct 9, 1999
26,459
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#39
Earache, my eye!! :)
 
Feb 2, 2000
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#40
Oh, that reminds me of another one. My mom used to tell me &quot;I don't care if you are sh*tting out your eyes, or your head falls off, you are still going to school in the morning.&quot; Ah, the memories. :D
 
May 31, 2000
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#41
i have the fun memory of da...

&quot;Do that again and you will be picking yourself up out of the wall&quot;
 
Jun 13, 2000
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#42
&quot;Just wait until we get home&quot;, and &quot;Go cut a switch&quot; That was always the ultimate. Having to choose which stick for dad to beat us with. My brother and I hated that as little kids - especially me. He always knew which ones to get so they would break in the middle of getting switched.
 

WombatWoman

Diamond Member
Feb 19, 2000
5,439
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#43
One of the most frequent refrains of my teen years: &quot;If you think you are going out in public dressed like THAT, you have another think coming.&quot; So, of course, I covered the cleavage, pulled the skirt hem down as far as possible, left the house, rearranged everything as soon as I got out the front door, and left with a secret smile on my face.

Now wipe that smile off your face, young lady...
 

JPT

Senior member
Jan 23, 2000
419
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#44
Any sons of doctors around recognise these?

-&quot;Dad, it hurts when I do this&quot; - &quot;Don't do it...&quot;

-&quot;Can I take an *(any random medicin)*?&quot; - &quot;No&quot; - &quot;Why? Is it bad for my stomach or something?&quot; - &quot;No... It's expensive...&quot;
or even: -&quot;Just go to bed and it will be better tomorrow&quot;

 
Oct 14, 1999
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#45
i am actually smarter than my parents, and know more about certain things...

unfortunately, this also means i don't listen a lick to what they say.

i realized this fact when i was pretty young, my parents were not educated. meaning the highest level of education either got was JHS, in china.

i am a good little boy, so, um, those things were never actually said to me.
 
Feb 24, 2000
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#46
My parents always said, &quot;don't get smart.&quot;


Whenever I heard that i would get up, continually walk into walls, and say duh.
 

compuwiz1

Admin Emeritus Elite Member
Oct 9, 1999
26,459
159
126
#47
Go to your room! :p
 

Slacker

Diamond Member
Oct 9, 1999
8,621
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#48
Didnt read the whole thing but I bet no one had this one

I'm so mad that if I hit you right now I'd probably kill you

Dont know what made him (Dad) like that way back then (25yrs ago) but he is a different person now, I have never spanked/hit my son, never will, I can get through to him with words just fine.
 

Ulfwald

Moderator Emeritus<br>Elite Member
May 27, 2000
8,646
0
71
#49
Whenever I got hurt, my dad always said: &quot;Get up and dust yourself off, you'll never know it a year from now.&quot;
 

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