This is gonna hurt me more than it hurts you..............

[compuwiz1]

.....and other stuff your parents used to say.

I never believed that one, 'specially since I was the one with the burnin butt. :Q

 

[kranky]

When crying over something trivial: "Stop crying or I'll give you something to cry about"
When laughing inappropriately: "Laugh it up, funny boy" (followed by the threat of the belt)
And the infamous "...and if Bobby jumped off a bridge, would you do it too?"

 

[Crysla]

"You are the worst kids in the entire world." Of course this was always said while my brother and I were doing our damndest to embarrass the parents in public. And of course my smartass reply was always, "Nuh uh, our friends are wayyyyy worse than us. Consider yourself lucky Mom." Never did seem to help. Still got punished.

Princess

 

I have the habit of saying to my little one what my parents use to say to me all the time.
Close the door!You think you live in a barn?

 

[Yeeny]

Children in Africa are starving, they would love to have your food. I got in so much trouble when I told her to send it to them. :Q

 

[Moonbeam]

The one I hated to hear was, "This is gonna hurt you alot more than it's gonna hurt me."

 

[Paul]

When in Elementary Skool:

"The rules are here to get you ready for middle school. They don't allow this kind of behavior is middle school you know!"


Children games:

"Step on a crack and break your mom's back" Never happened.


Kids are sooo gullible

 

[Russ]

If you fall out of that tree and break your leg, don't come running to me.

Reach accross the table again, and you'll pull back a bloody stump.

Russ, NCNE

 

[Yeeny]

Wow Russ, your parents were vicious!

How about "Do you kiss your mother with that mouth"?

 

[WombatWoman]

What really got to me was my Mama's endless repetitions of "Now, I'm not gonna tell you this again..."

I always wanted to smart off and say "Ya promise?" But I didn't.
If I had, I would probably walk kinda funny to this very day.

 

[Monel Funkawitz]

"Do you want to stand in the corner?"

~Hell no mom. Do you think I am dumb enough to say "yes"?~

 

[Brooks]

Russ

You must be kidding - the bloody stump one is hilarious

crysla and girlfriday

Sounds just like what kids would say

 

[yakko]

How about being told "It builds character" when doing a particularly bad task.Like cleaning up where the cat decided to make its own litter box.

 

[compuwiz1]

"Don't do that! You could put an eye out".

 

[Russ]

Brooks,

I didn't think it was funny when I was a kid. As a grownup, it's funny, though.

Russ, NCNE

 

[compuwiz1]

And then there was the infamous, "you make a better door than a window", when standing in front of the tv.

One way to guarantee I was gonna get in trouble, was to tell me not to do something. I just had a knack for always breaking the rules.

 

[Moonbeam]

You can't put an old head on young sholders. Can't put one on old sholders either, seems like.

 

[compuwiz1]

Patience is a virtue. Yeah, like I really wanted to wait for anything.
Are we there yet?

 

[reitz]

"Why?"
"Because I said so!"

That one still pisses me off...

 

[Brooks]

Reitz

Me too, I think that one is awful, it totally takes away the teaching to a kid about why something has to be like it is "because I said so" made me very mad.

Brooks

 

[RU482]

When I was in my late teens, my dad would say
keep yer peter in yer britches and yer car between the ditches

 

[PCAddict]

I used to attempt to hide when I was a kid and I was going to be getting a whoopin' from one/both of my parents. They used to say that if I came out on my own they'd go easy on me. I learned really fast that they were lying.

 

[compuwiz1]

And then there was this, the really dreaded one :

Just wait until your father gets home!

 

[Sluggo]

Compuwiz just took the words "wait till your father gets home" right out of my mouth. Reminds me of Summertime long long ago, when every day we dreaded when Dad would get home. We were always screwing with someone or something in the neighborhood. Actually "Malcolm in the middle" reminds me a lot of my brothers and I.

Sluggo

 

[Dorn]

My biggest problem as a kid - I was too much of a smart*ss. When my parents said things like these to me, I was too stupid to keep my mouth shut. This led to situtions like the following:

Like GirlFriday, I also offered to send my supper to the "poor starving kids in Africa."

"It's all fun and games 'til someone loses an eye!"
"Yeah, then it's just funny!"

"I've just about had enough of you!"
"Well can you tell me when you have had enough? No point stopping before then."

"This is going to hurt me more than you."
"Hey! If that's so, why don't we trade places? I'm the one who needs punishing - let me beat the tar out of you for a change!"

Needless to say, I think I still have a scar across my bum for that last one..