Things We Can Do To The Moon

[rocketPack]

Originally posted by: MetalStorm
I like the idea of covering it in tin foil personally, in fact, it would be possible to make it in to a huge mirror ball so everyone can put on some music and dance!

ahahahahaahaha. yes.

 

[sao123]

we should use nukes to carve the moon into a giant penis floating across the sky.

 

[WoodenPupa]

"Drugs're bad, m'kay?"

So is a telephone pole up the arse.

"First why do you want to nuke the moon into oblivion?"

That's between me and the Moon.

Second, if you do that, how will you cover it in tinfoil?

Well, I never dictated a strict order as to what should be done first. Obviously, we cover it in tinfoil first, then blast it all to hell.

"Also, the same side of the moon always faces Earth so you only have to cover 1 side of it in tinfoil. Not the whole thing."

Now *this* is a good point. However I do feel morally obliged to cover the whole thing, as that would be part of the advertising campaign. I wouldn't want to lie to people. Plus it would just give me that abstract satiety that artists universally strive for.


"As for the smiley face, I'd suggest just programming the automated vaccuuming robots to do that task while they're at it."


Well, I'm talking to Hoover and some other American companies. They tell me the difficulties are formidable; I keep telling them to stop thinking like sissies.

I have to stress the fact once more that the purpose of the list was to elucidate the technical issues. We haven't ironed everything out yet. First we had to figure out whether all of it was even possible; I think we've done that. Now we're determining which methods will be best.

 

[WoodenPupa]

Originally posted by: ribbon13
A Tesla Oscillator about the size of a Honda Civic could effectively crack the moon in half.

Details, man, DETAILS!

 

[Jeff7]

Seriously though, I believe in the nuke idea. If anything, it would be a great way of getting rid of the world's nuclear stockpile. And what a show it would be! Telescope sales would be WAY up. And no, I don't work for any of the major telescope companies

Of course, one problem with this is a way of getting the nukes to the kind of velocity needed to reach the moon. If you're going to exert that much energy, you might as well do it right and send the things into the sun and not have to worry about them ever again, rather than irradiate a nearby natural satellite.

 

[twharry]

The moon could easily be overclocked to at least 10gHz with just a stock fan.

 

[imported_Hamzter]

Originally posted by: twharry
The moon could easily be overclocked to at least 10gHz with just a stock fan.

There's a problem though, there's no air on the moon so the fan wouldn't work! Perhaps water cooling...

 

[alius]

Vacuums can't work in a vacuum can they? I mean...there is no way to lower the pressure in space so you can't really coax the dust to move in a direction without direct manipulation. Right?

alius

 

[DrPizza]

Originally posted by: WoodenPupa
MetalStorm, I had thought the France cheesmarket thing was disproven, but I'll recheck my data.

Everyone else, thanks for the highly technical info. I learned a lot.

I must say I'm disappointed that our nuclear stockpile can't penetrate to the moon's core. The optimist in me can't accept that. For that reason I'm going to encourage Korea's development in the hopes that one day the world can join together and pound the crap out of our heavenly satellite.

So the moon thinks it's tough just because we can't pound it out with our current stockpile? I'm not giving up.

As far as ideas from the movie Armageddon, well, that was Hollywood. I'm talking about reality here.

Once again, thanks to everyone.

Like hell you are.

Surface area = 4Pi r^2
radius of the moon = 1737.4 kilometers
That's 1,737,400 meters.
The surface area is 3.79 times 10^13 square meters.
37932300000000 square meters.

Let's assume you have a method to cover it at 100 square meters per second...
That's a little over 12 THOUSAND years to cover the whole thing.
(of course, your wisdom implies that you're smart enough to only cover the side towards earth... but some of us might want the Aliens to see the giant ball-o-foil and realize:
"there's no intelligent life there... what kind of fvcktard covers a moon in aluminum foil"
Anyway, covering just half of the moon is 6000 years. (6014, actually)

Now, how are you getting that aluminum foil up there?
Let's assume you're using some pretty thin stuff... .03mm thick.
that's 3 hundreds of a thousandth of a meter thick. 3 x 10^-5 meters thick...
The volume of all the aluminum foil is 379*10^13 times 3 * 10 ^-5
= 1137970000 cubic meters of aluminum foil.
Or, roughly 1 cubic kilometer
1 kilometer wide by 1 kilometer high, by 1 kilometer thick.

Incidentally, if my calculations are correct, the entire human population of the earth could be squeezed into 1 cubic kilometer. Since the density of a human is less than the density of aluminum, it would be far cheaper to simply transport the entire population of humans to the moon, drop them from a sufficient altitude such that even with the moon's weak gravity, they'll splat upon impact, and paint the moon red from our blood. Then again, You're going to come up far far short on the amount of blood required to paint the moon red.

 

[DrPizza]

Originally posted by: WoodenPupa

I have to stress the fact once more that the purpose of the list was to elucidate the technical issues. We haven't ironed everything out yet. First we had to figure out whether all of it was even possible; I think we've done that. Now we're determining which methods will be best.

Don't even get me started on the volume of the dust!

 

[ahurtt]

Originally posted by: alius
Vacuums can't work in a vacuum can they? I mean...there is no way to lower the pressure in space so you can't really coax the dust to move in a direction without direct manipulation. Right?

alius

Hmmm, good point. Get the Swiffers!

 

[ahurtt]

Originally posted by: DrPizza

Like hell you are.

Surface area = 4Pi r^2
radius of the moon = 1737.4 kilometers
That's 1,737,400 meters.
The surface area is 3.79 times 10^13 square meters.
37932300000000 square meters.

Let's assume you have a method to cover it at 100 square meters per second...
That's a little over 12 THOUSAND years to cover the whole thing.
(of course, your wisdom implies that you're smart enough to only cover the side towards earth... but some of us might want the Aliens to see the giant ball-o-foil and realize:
"there's no intelligent life there... what kind of fvcktard covers a moon in aluminum foil"
Anyway, covering just half of the moon is 6000 years. (6014, actually)

To the contrary, I think it'd show that we were quite advanced and genius if we could in fact figure out a way to cover the moon in foil. Maybe the aliens would just assume we were idiot savants. Imagine the conversation between two alien buddies peering out of their spaceship porthole:

Larry: Marvin, Look at this! A giant foil covered moon!
Marvin: Wow! What the Flurk!? That is amazing. . .
Larry: Yah, wonder how they did that?
Marvin: I dunno but it couldn't have been easy. Must be some really advanced lifeforms down there.
Larry: Why do you suppose they did that?
Marvin: What if it's a weapon like in that "Space Wars" movie they made?
Larry: It's "Star Wars."
Marvin: Yeah, whatever. Star Wars, Space Wars. . .same difference.
Larry: Hmm, maybe they are more advanced than we thought. Lets not attack their planet and take them over. We might be getting more than we bargained for.
Marvin: Yeah, you're right. We are dealing with forces here we cannot possibly comprehend. Let's go home.

Now, how are you getting that aluminum foil up there?
Let's assume you're using some pretty thin stuff... .03mm thick.
that's 3 hundreds of a thousandth of a meter thick. 3 x 10^-5 meters thick...
The volume of all the aluminum foil is 379*10^13 times 3 * 10 ^-5
= 1137970000 cubic meters of aluminum foil.
Or, roughly 1 cubic kilometer
1 kilometer wide by 1 kilometer high, by 1 kilometer thick.

Well, why do you need to take the foil up there? And why does it have to be aluminum. Surely there must be metallic ores in the moons crust suitable for mining and making into "moon foil" of some kind. We just need to get the manufacturing equipment up there. It could be just about any kind of metal that is capable of being made into foil since the moon has no atmosphere or water and thus, no corrosion or rust would occur.

Incidentally, if my calculations are correct, the entire human population of the earth could be squeezed into 1 cubic kilometer. Since the density of a human is less than the density of aluminum, it would be far cheaper to simply transport the entire population of humans to the moon, drop them from a sufficient altitude such that even with the moon's weak gravity, they'll splat upon impact, and paint the moon red from our blood. Then again, You're going to come up far far short on the amount of blood required to paint the moon red.

What method is cheaper than another becomes irrelevant if you destroy the whole human population of the earth. To whom would you pay the money?

 

[Rock Hydra]

I'm sure that it would make the moon so reflective that it would be bright during the night-time.

 

[TitanDiddly]

Advertising space.

 

[Yossarian451]

Originally posted by: DrPizza
Incidentally, if my calculations are correct, the entire human population of the earth could be squeezed into 1 cubic kilometer. Since the density of a human is less than the density of aluminum, it would be far cheaper to simply transport the entire population of humans to the moon, drop them from a sufficient altitude such that even with the moon's weak gravity, they'll splat upon impact, and paint the moon red from our blood. Then again, You're going to come up far far short on the amount of blood required to paint the moon red.

Where did you get you calulation from?

Lets say average human is 5'6" = 1.6764 meters witha depth of (making this up) 6" =.15 and a width of 1'=.3 meters,
so the average human would be about .075 cubic meters.

The estiated population is 6,423,692,361. That give us a volume of 481 776 927 cubic meters. This is 0.481776927 cubic kilometers.

 

[flyboy84]

I like #2 and #3...but combine them. Make the moon into a face, put a tin foil hat on it so They can't steal its thoughts.

 

[miketheidiot]

Originally posted by: WoodenPupa
MetalStorm, I had thought the France cheesmarket thing was disproven, but I'll recheck my data.

Everyone else, thanks for the highly technical info. I learned a lot.

I must say I'm disappointed that our nuclear stockpile can't penetrate to the moon's core. The optimist in me can't accept that. For that reason I'm going to encourage Korea's development in the hopes that one day the world can join together and pound the crap out of our heavenly satellite.

So the moon thinks it's tough just because we can't pound it out with our current stockpile? I'm not giving up.

As far as ideas from the movie Armageddon, well, that was Hollywood. I'm talking about reality here.

Once again, thanks to everyone.

if you did the armegedeon "drill hole drop nuke run rinse and repeat" thing a few thousand times eventually you might drill to the center of the moon. Of course if you did the centeral whole would have to support the entire weight of the moon, as it's gravity would pull it into the middle.

To be honest though i don't see a point to any of these plans.

 

[villageidiot111]

Originally posted by: Gibsons

1) Now, the moon is a big rock. Can we destroy the thing? Yes, it would have disastrous consequences without a plan in mind, but nevermind that for the moment. Do we have enough nuclear power to pound it into oblivion? To blast it to bits? I would have to guess no, but what would happen if we concentrated all the nukes at the same spot, one after the other? wouldn't that create craters within craters, until the core was reached?

we might be able to shatter it, but it would take something like a few million times the worlds current nuclear arsenal. (cite - random guesswork)

All it would take is one nuke, plus Bruce Willis and a tricked out drillmobile.

 

[DrPizza]

Originally posted by: Yossarian451

Originally posted by: DrPizza
Incidentally, if my calculations are correct, the entire human population of the earth could be squeezed into 1 cubic kilometer. Since the density of a human is less than the density of aluminum, it would be far cheaper to simply transport the entire population of humans to the moon, drop them from a sufficient altitude such that even with the moon's weak gravity, they'll splat upon impact, and paint the moon red from our blood. Then again, You're going to come up far far short on the amount of blood required to paint the moon red.

Where did you get you calulation from?

Lets say average human is 5'6" = 1.6764 meters witha depth of (making this up) 6" =.15 and a width of 1'=.3 meters,
so the average human would be about .075 cubic meters.

The estiated population is 6,423,692,361. That give us a volume of 481 776 927 cubic meters. This is 0.481776927 cubic kilometers.

So, you agree that the entire population could fit inside one cubic kilometer. Thanks.

The source of my calculation: rather than guess at the volume, I calculated the volume of a human from the average weight and density. Shot in the dark: 50 to 75 kilograms per average human. Density right around 1 gram/cc (1 kilogram/liter). About the same estimate that you have. I should have said "easily be squeezed," except it wouldn't be easy to convince anyone to go along with the plan. Plus, I assumed the people at the bottom would be packed in pretty tightly with very little air space, but the people toward the top would leave some gaps (unless we puree them first, but then it'd be even harder to convince them to climb into the cubic kilometer.)

 

[DrPizza]

Originally posted by: miketheidiot

Originally posted by: WoodenPupa
MetalStorm, I had thought the France cheesmarket thing was disproven, but I'll recheck my data.

Everyone else, thanks for the highly technical info. I learned a lot.

I must say I'm disappointed that our nuclear stockpile can't penetrate to the moon's core. The optimist in me can't accept that. For that reason I'm going to encourage Korea's development in the hopes that one day the world can join together and pound the crap out of our heavenly satellite.

So the moon thinks it's tough just because we can't pound it out with our current stockpile? I'm not giving up.

As far as ideas from the movie Armageddon, well, that was Hollywood. I'm talking about reality here.

Once again, thanks to everyone.

if you did the armegedeon "drill hole drop nuke run rinse and repeat" thing a few thousand times eventually you might drill to the center of the moon. Of course if you did the centeral whole would have to support the entire weight of the moon, as it's gravity would pull it into the middle.

To be honest though i don't see a point to any of these plans.

But, if you drill a hole all the way to the center, all the gravity will leak out!!
:Q

 

[MetalStorm]

Originally posted by: DrPizza
But, if you drill a hole all the way to the center, all the gravity will leak out!!:Q

That's a very good point! I hadn't taken that in to account! I still think using space mice to eat their way though the moon is still viable though.

 

[The Boston Dangler]

Gibsons, you get mad props for the Tick reference. Maybe we could give The Man in the Moon some cosmetic surgery. Like make him a Jack O Lantern for Halloween? Or maybe Osama bin Laden whenever the government wants to scare the crap out of us.

Seriously though, it's only a few years before we have space based advertising visible to the naked eye. Picture a net 100's of miles wide with LEDs. You won't be able to walk outside ANYWHERE without seeing "Pepsi". Or the GoDaddy.com chick. I guess it's not all bad.

 

[The Boston Dangler]

Hey, we could give the keys to the moon to an uninsured immigrant, and watch them drive around a rotary all day waiting for a Mercedes to fail to yield right of way. It's a Massachusetts thing.

 

[misterj]

LOL. anywho, i resent the space program when we have so much to do here on Earth. i would rather we explore the sea.

 

[SirAllen]

The future of man is in space, not the sea. Why waste money on the sea?