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Tales from the retail world...

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We're required to ID people for stupid stuff like cough medicine, lighters and rubber cement because we can't sell it to kids. We have to scan the code on the back because the company doesn't trust us.
I overheard an angry guy in another checkout lane shout "Just sell me the damn lighter, I'm not letting you scan my ID, thats IDENTITY THEFT!
 
Hmm, some of the pizza place ones took me back...

Worked at a pizza place where we had this customer that the delivery drivers could never find her house, she'd go ballistic when it couldn't be delivered, and then offer to come pick it up (for free.) Mind you this was in a middle/upper class neighborhood. Finally one time when she pulled this stunt I was just getting off work so I decided to wait around and follow her to see where this house was that was so hard to find... turns out she had been giving a non-existent address the whole time. She was PISSED the next time she called in and was busted on it.

That place had a policy of refunding money + giving a coupon for next time if you were "unhappy" with your order and it was sure odd how the same people that were unhappy every single time kept ordering from there...
 
Used to be a Student Manager at a Mexican place run by the Concessions dept at my Uni. Sold a lady an Enchilada platter that consisted of two Enchiladas covered with cheese and sauce, rice, beans, salad, and some pickled red onions.

She also order Chips and Queso...basically, she was eating good.

About 45 minutes pass and one of my students calls me to the front to help him. The lady was there holding an empty plate with a long, brown strand of hair lying across it.

She demanded her money back for the food. I asked her what the problem was, she told me she found the hair in the food. I said, "okay, where is the food?".."I ate it"..."When did you discover the hair?"..."After I was finished".. SHE CLEANED THE PLATE, not a speck of food left..just smears of color.

I stood there for a minute looking at the hair and back at her. I then said "see, mam...its hard to believe that this hair was in your food when we gave it to you. First, its longer than the plate (it wasnt bent, it was straight and was clean of food) and second none of us have that hair color or length and we all wear hair nets and hats." Instead of giving her a refund, I just gave her a coupon for a free small chips or small beans and rice. $2 value...but it was cheap inventory items that we toss at the end of the night, so I didn't care.

The platter was about 1lb of food for $8... I don't know why she ate ALL the food and then planted her own hair on the plate to try and get a refund.
 
SheHateMe said:
Used to be a Student Manager at a Mexican place run by the Concessions dept at my Uni. Sold a lady an Enchilada platter that consisted of two Enchiladas covered with cheese and sauce, rice, beans, salad, and some pickled red onions.

She also order Chips and Queso...basically, she was eating good.

About 45 minutes pass and one of my students calls me to the front to help him. The lady was there holding an empty plate with a long, brown strand of hair lying across it.

She demanded her money back for the food. I asked her what the problem was, she told me she found the hair in the food. I said, "okay, where is the food?".."I ate it"..."When did you discover the hair?"..."After I was finished".. SHE CLEANED THE PLATE, not a speck of food left..just smears of color.

I stood there for a minute looking at the hair and back at her. I then said "see, mam...its hard to believe that this hair was in your food when we gave it to you. First, its longer than the plate (it wasnt bent, it was straight and was clean of food) and second none of us have that hair color or length and we all wear hair nets and hats." Instead of giving her a refund, I just gave her a coupon for a free small chips or small beans and rice. $2 value...but it was cheap inventory items that we toss at the end of the night, so I didn't care.

The platter was about 1lb of food for $8... I don't know why she ate ALL the food and then planted her own hair on the plate to try and get a refund.
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8 bucks is 8 bucks!
 
SheHateMe said:
Used to be a Student Manager at a Mexican place run by the Concessions dept at my Uni. Sold a lady an Enchilada platter that consisted of two Enchiladas covered with cheese and sauce, rice, beans, salad, and some pickled red onions.

She also order Chips and Queso...basically, she was eating good.

About 45 minutes pass and one of my students calls me to the front to help him. The lady was there holding an empty plate with a long, brown strand of hair lying across it.

She demanded her money back for the food. I asked her what the problem was, she told me she found the hair in the food. I said, "okay, where is the food?".."I ate it"..."When did you discover the hair?"..."After I was finished".. SHE CLEANED THE PLATE, not a speck of food left..just smears of color.

I stood there for a minute looking at the hair and back at her. I then said "see, mam...its hard to believe that this hair was in your food when we gave it to you. First, its longer than the plate (it wasnt bent, it was straight and was clean of food) and second none of us have that hair color or length and we all wear hair nets and hats." Instead of giving her a refund, I just gave her a coupon for a free small chips or small beans and rice. $2 value...but it was cheap inventory items that we toss at the end of the night, so I didn't care.

The platter was about 1lb of food for $8... I don't know why she ate ALL the food and then planted her own hair on the plate to try and get a refund.
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There are groups of people that does that regularly :whiste: according to my friends that works in the food industry.
 
midnight growler said:
We're required to ID people for stupid stuff like cough medicine, lighters and rubber cement because we can't sell it to kids. We have to scan the code on the back because the company doesn't trust us.
I overheard an angry guy in another checkout lane shout "Just sell me the damn lighter, I'm not letting you scan my ID, thats IDENTITY THEFT!
Click to expand...

You don't have to check ID as long as long the Cx is obviously older than 35.
 
"Do you sell party trays of pizza?"
"Yes we do. It's our specialty, in fact, it's the only way we make pizza."
"How many slices are in a tray?"
"We cut our trays into 28 slices."
"Hmmmm... <looks disappointed> That's too many slices."
Smartass: "Well, if you want, we could cut the tray into 12 big slices."
Eyes light up: "You could?! That would be perfect!"
 
DrPizza said:
"Do you sell party trays of pizza?"
"Yes we do. It's our specialty, in fact, it's the only way we make pizza."
"How many slices are in a tray?"
"We cut our trays into 28 slices."
"Hmmmm... <looks disappointed> That's too many slices."
Smartass: "Well, if you want, we could cut the tray into 12 big slices."
Eyes light up: "You could?! That would be perfect!"
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"Gasoline in liters instead of gallons? It will be so much more expensive then!"
 
Oh, the memories. I worked at a car rental branch for three years. As far as retail goes, it's an especially hellish environment. Most customers coming in automatically assume you're trying to screw them over.

One of my favourites were the forgetful customers. This exact same scene played out on many occasions. It's end of the month, moving day, and we're booked solid for trucks. Customer without a reservation walks. There's usually already a line of people with reservations waiting.
"Do you have any moving trucks available?"
"I'm sorry sir, they're booked solid, every truck on the lot has a confirmed reservation. It's end of the month you know."
"There are no trucks anywhere?"
"Let me check [checks computer, every other store is booked solid too] nope, sorry. Every store is out. You really gotta book them at least a week in advance. They go fast. They'll be one available first thing tomorrow though."
Customer puts hands on hips and in an aggressive manner says...
"We'll, what am I supposed to do. I'm moving, my stuff's outside my apartment"
Well asshat, you could have booked the truck in advance like everyone else did. We usually made the U-Haul's problem at this point.

Another fun set were the colour coordinators. It was Good Friday and I somehow got stuck working at the busiest store in the territory. A truly nightmarish place. Once again we're booked solid. Only car we have left is a burnt orange KIA Soul. I go to pick up the lady who booked it. Spoiled looking Desi princess in her 20s. She says nothing about the car the whole ride back. When we go to give it to her, she kicks up a stink about the colour. There's already a line up out the door at this point (people renting SUVs). She angrily demands we get her a silver car. It's not a bloody dealership hon. When you book you're told only class is guaranteed, not colour, make, or model. It's a logistical nightmare to do that bordering on impossibility. We eventually coaxed her into the orange car when she found out every other rental outlet was booked solid.

Then there was the Watchtower. The headquarters for the Jahova's Witnesses in Canada. They'd rent from us occasionally. Accusations of them being a cult is most certainly justified in my mind after dealing with them for so long. They'd always want a ride and they'd always use that as an excuse to try and convert you.
One day we rent a car to this Mexican fellow from Watchtower. He had been coming in on and off. He returns the car overnight. When you do that, the car still remains your responsibility until we open the store the next morning. When we did, the car had a massive dent in it.
So, then comes the dreadful phone call. Anytime someone damages a vehicle, it's a colossal headache. There's a lot of paperwork, phone calls, and people screaming. So we let him know. First he accuses me of missing the damage on the outgoing inspection. Pretty hard to miss. Dent was softball sized right on the rear driver's door. Some of the pillar was damaged too. He gets called out on that so he changes his story to say it happened in our parking lot overnight. We let him know that since it happened before we opened, it's still his responsibility if it were a hit and run. Then he claims he returned it at 5:45pm, 15min before we closed, and the place was already dark and locked up. I wasn't working that day but I know the guy who was pretty well. He always left and 6 bang on. Not a minute sooner, not a minute later.
So we went to get the damage appraised, $1000 to fix it, at a bodyshop neutral to us so that was the street price. He was pissed, said he'd sue. So we did some digging. Guy working said he left 15min late that day because he had to drive one of our regulars home that returned at 6pm on the nose. Checked his time sheet and it showed he had indeed left at 6:15pm. It's all electronic done via a remote server so it's impossible to tamper with the clock. Caught in a lie, he forked over the $1000 and we never had to deal with Watchtower again. We were greatly relieved.
 
Sephire said:
There are groups of people that does that regularly :whiste: according to my friends that works in the food industry.
Click to expand...

Yup,

I was working at an Italian place during college and had a couple of customers try something similar.

They'd get a chicken Caesar salad, eat the whole thing except for one piece of chicken and then say they wanted their money back because the chicken was under cooked.

So first, I was paranoid about serving under cooked chicken and would check each breast before sending it out.

And second, who the fuck eats uncooked chicken breast?

The manger still caved each time and gave them their money back.
 
Not really retail, but when I was 18/19 I worked at a Subway. Started dating the new girl there (smoking hot body. About a seven in the face, long brown hair, blue eyes). Anyway, we broke up after six months or so. We'd both moved on and dated other people.

At first, the ex and I didn't want to work together. More so her than me. I just didn't care. But somehow we ended up working a night shift together, alone.

We flirted, talked about "the good times", etc.. I didn't really think much of it. Then out of nowhere she says, "I'll lock the front door and fuck your brains out in the back.". After the initial shock passed, I replied, "No you won't.".

She walked up, calmly as you please, locked the door, turned off the open sign, took me in the back, fulfilled her promise (on the food prep table...don't worry, she cleaned it afterwards!), then we went back up front and finished out our shift.

Neither of us ever spoke of it again. She moved to another state a few weeks later.
 
Little Ceasars in Shaker Heights Ohio - a woman came in to pick up a pizza and saw we had a deal with pizza + spaghetti and wanted the spaghetti. I told her that her order was for something different, but I could change it so she got spaghetti, but it would be a different size pizza (smaller). Ten minutes of ranting, then she jumps over the counter, grabs a tub of spaghetti, and tries to run (while of course I have her name/phone number from the order).
 
Once a month we have a free breakfast buffet for club members. One of our regulars, who has never had anything nice to say in the last five years, comes in 5 minutes before we close and asked for a to go container because he's running late...

I stare at him while the gears grind in my head because my first instinct is to try and put myself in his shoes. Nothing remotely reasonable comes to surface so, I tell him no, the buffet is for members to eat here. He gets pissed and says he's going to cancel his membership. So now, I'm annoyed and tell him "please do."

Next day he's back for lunch. WTF? Maybe he'd like us to deliver his free food to his office whenever he's running late?
 
MisterJackson said:
Dear PenthouseNot really retail, but when I was 18/19 I worked at a Subway. Started dating the new girl there (smoking hot body. About a seven in the face, long brown hair, blue eyes). Anyway, we broke up after six months or so. We'd both moved on and dated other people.

At first, the ex and I didn't want to work together. More so her than me. I just didn't care. But somehow we ended up working a night shift together, alone.

We flirted, talked about "the good times", etc.. I didn't really think much of it. Then out of nowhere she says, "I'll lock the front door and fuck your brains out in the back.". After the initial shock passed, I replied, "No you won't.".

She walked up, calmly as you please, locked the door, turned off the open sign, took me in the back, fulfilled her promise (on the food prep table...don't worry, she cleaned it afterwards!), then we went back up front and finished out our shift.

Neither of us ever spoke of it again. She moved to another state a few weeks later.
Click to expand...
FTFY:whiste:
 
I finally finished this epic thread after a few days. My stories are just a few that I have thought of while reading this.

In HS I worked at KFC. The owner was really cheap and when I asked for a .25 raise he made me change the enite menu pricing by .25 to cover my raise.

We used to mess around with the c02 bottles by putting tape on the nozzle so we could shoot plastic bottles off of it. We got really good with our aim and many guys took a shot to the nuts.

There was a very old lady who worked there who should have been in a nursing home. One day has she was making a plate for somebody, she poured gravy on top of the mashed taters. Well a green bean had fallen in the gravy and ended up on top of said taters. As she turned to give the plate to the customer she picked the green bean off the top of the taters and ate it. The poor dude just stood there in disgust and me also. I made him a new plate and gave him a free drink.

At our store, drinks did not come with the meal and cost $1 extra. A lot of people would get mad and talk trash about it and tell me off like its my fault or something. The ones who didnt usually got one for free from me. Its proof that if you are a dick you will be treated like one but if you are cool about things people are more apt to help you out.

After I quit there I went to work at Discount Tires in a very rich area. I miss that job so much, not so much the pay but the people and work.

I cant count how many times people would ask us to check their brakes while we had the wheel off. They would then really super mad when we told them that all we do is tires and not brakes but they could go across the street to have their brakes checked at Brake Masters.

Really old guy brings his '57 chevy in to have new tires put on. He went on how he wants the best tech there to do it since the rims had the orginal lead based paint that could not be purchased anymore. I get boned out and had to do it. This guy is telling me how to do my job and wont let me use the lift because he doest trust it. So after jacking it up one tire at a time and an hour later I am done. He says that he doesnt like the way it looks and wants his old stuff put back on. By this time the store manager has come by since he is putting on a scene. He tells the guy that we will do that but later due to us getting backed up since his car took one of our bays for over an hour. Guy gets mad and demands it to be done now. Again he is told that we would do it later but we need to push out some of our other orders. He gets pissed off and leaves. The kicker is that the tires I put on were the exact same as what he had on just new.

The worst thing that happened there was when this old guy came in to get his tire pressure checked. When he got out he wearing a tanktop and like daisy dukes. I was just about done on the rear passanger tire when the old guy asked "hows it look back there". As I look up, this old bastard is bent over at the waist with his balls sticking out the bottem of his shorts, just grinning at me. Before I looked up I began to anwser him by saying "everything looks good" and when I said good we locked eyes with his balls just hanging out. While I tried to walk away he handed me a 20. This guy never came back again and I know I was given the 20 to look at his balls.


I got to see a lot of cool cars come in. I also got to work on Jenna Jamesons lambo!
 
In High school, I worked at a small grocery store, one time at night we had the loading doors opened on the back dock, and filled a very large bag up with helium and released it. A few days later we were told not to do that, apparently the police station across the street didn't approve of our shenanigans.

I also unloaded trucks at Wal-mart while in college. I remember one night this guy picking up an old pallet and it slipped and a piece of wood about the size of a tent stake went though his hand. I said, looks like you should go to the ER to get that out of there. But the guy said he was fine, and later told me that he wouldn't pass the drug test.

A few years later the store moved and the converted the store to a supercenter. One time I was up near the front of the store, and there was basically a trail of diarrhea that went most of the way though the store. I was asked to clean it up, I did reluctantly, even though the floor crew should have done it. Anyways, I bring the mop back to the compactor in the back and threw the whole thing in, the manager wanted the mop head taken off but wasn't willing to crawl down there and do it himself.

I also did a few months in the toy department, one day this kid kept riding a bike and knocking stuff over, I told him to stop. He said that he didn't have to listen to me. I then told him that I was about to drag him outside. He said that he was going to tell the manager. I then told him that he was just a little kid and no one would believe him. The kid got off of the bike and left after that.

I somehow managed to stay at that job for 5 years and was given a 5 year award, during the team meeting they called me to the front of the group and presented the award to me. I then gave the following acceptance speech which landed me in the managers office the next day:
Wow, this is really great, first I would like to thank all of the little people that I had to step over to get to where I am today in this company, I would also like to thank my co-workers for helping to keep me safe here as well. I would also like to thank this entire row to my right, I don't know what you do here, but keep up the good work.
Two weeks later I transferred out of that store since I had just finished up my computer science degree.
 
Sixguns said:
As I look up, this old bastard is bent over at the waist with his balls sticking out the bottem of his shorts, just grinning at me. Before I looked up I began to anwser him by saying "everything looks good" and when I said good we locked eyes with his balls just hanging out. While I tried to walk away he handed me a 20. This guy never came back again and I know I was given the 20 to look at his balls.
Click to expand...

Story of the year.
 
Not sure if this qualifies to be here but here's my story:

My Boss and I had been working out of town in an ocean side town in Oregon. We had to stay the night at a Motel until the work was done. We would work at a chain of Nursing homes and travel to where they needed us.

We'd install new flooring. As you can imagine some of the floors were pretty nasty. And it always smelled like urine in those places. And some other funky smells I don't know what they were.

A lot of these old people were totally senile with Alzheimer's. They would wander around in a daze. We had to try hard to keep them from getting into our stuff or getting hurt (little did we know we were the ones who would have to keep from getting hurt). I feel bad for them. But it can be very frustrating having to work and keep an eye on them too. The staff does the best they can but there are just to many of them walking around.

So one day this ancient old fragile woman seemed to take a liking to my boss. She managed to sneak up on him. Or maybe he was just not keeping his guard up enough. I don't know. But she gets close enough to him and suddenly reaches out and GRABS HIS BALLS!

He tries to pull away but she has this death grip on his nuts. He can't get loose! He's trying to turn away and shield himself from her but also not hurt the old lady. But she keeps this iron grip on his nuts. He's almost dragging her trying to get away but he can't go far because I'm sure he's worried she might fall and end up in the Hospital.

God I wish I could remember what she was saying. It was something funny. She kept yelling it.

It seemed like ages before the staff finally runs over to help. He's squirming around and a bunch of people are trying to unlatch her grip. It was like something from a bad comedy movie. If someone had videotaped it you'd never think it was real.

They finally pry her off his crotch. Not sure how much damage she did. But this is my Boss who only had one nut left to make kids because years before his other nut had swollen up to the size of a grapefruit and he had to go to the ER.

Overall it was usually a nice trip though. I liked working out in the beach towns, getting paid for staying the night, eating at nice restaurants that overlook the beach, and having all my meals paid for. Don't know if I'd say the same thing though if my Balls got put in a vice grip.
 
T9D said:
So one day this ancient old fragile woman seemed to take a liking to my boss. She managed to sneak up on him. Or maybe he was just not keeping his guard up enough. I don't know. But she gets close enough to him and suddenly reaches out and GRABS HIS BALLS!

He tries to pull away but she has this death grip on his nuts. He can't get loose! He's trying to turn away and shield himself from her but also not hurt the old lady. But she keeps this iron grip on his nuts. He's almost dragging her trying to get away but he can't go far because I'm sure he's worried she might fall and end up in the Hospital.

God I wish I could remember what she was saying. It was something funny. She kept yelling it.

It seemed like ages before the staff finally runs over to help. He's squirming around and a bunch of people are trying to unlatch her grip. It was like something from a bad comedy movie. If someone had videotaped it you'd never think it was real.

They finally pry her off his crotch. Not sure how much damage she did. But this is my Boss who only had one nut left to make kids because years before his other nut had swollen up to the size of a grapefruit and he had to go to the ER.

Overall it was usually a nice trip though. I liked working out in the beach towns, getting paid for staying the night, eating at nice restaurants that overlook the beach, and having all my meals paid for. Don't know if I'd say the same thing though if my Balls got put in a vice grip.
Click to expand...

That one made me LOL
 
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