Tales from the retail world...

[jdub1107]

Originally posted by: DingDingDao

Originally posted by: virtueixi
Manager made me walk this crackhead out of the pharmacy, I had to touch her arm and everything. She could barely walk straight. I was 17 at the time, now I would have told him to f off. I was only getting paid $6 an hour.

Uh, exactly what kind of disease do you think you'd get from touching someone's arm?

Uh, friend gave money to a bum and the bum tried to shake his hand. He did, since it was dark at the bus station and he didn't want to be rude to the guy either. Fast forward a couple days later, and he contracted some kind of wart looknig growth that itched, and he had to get prescription for it.

 

[rh71]

Originally posted by: akubireally? only 5% of the ppl here never worked in retail? i feel like an outcast

I must've had about 20 jobs during my teenage years and through college... (I drive around town now with my wife and I point out all the places I've worked at - it even amazes me)... anyway lots of temp positions and all that (was never around long enough because of school)... data entry, some database work, clerical... but never retail. It wasn't a conscious thing to stay away... just never really wanted to do anything like cashier, stock, sales, etc.

 

[murphy55d]

I worked overnight in a Wal-Mart Supercenter for 3 and a half years, one time, a large woman in one of the electric Mart-Carts decided to relieve herself in front of the milk cooler doors. Didn't get up, just kept on going in the scooter, leaving a nice little trail behind her.

 

[cain]

now i am seriously thinking about retail ahaha. i work from 8:30-5:30, and there is a compUSA nearby where I live. hmmm...

 

[Insomniak]

Had a lady come into my employer one time looking for speakers. I take her to our selection, note that the Logitech models are the best we carry (we don't have a huge selection) and that they're comparably priced with everyone else. I recommended them because they sounded far better than the other stuff we had.

So she says "Well, do they have a blue light on them? I want them to have a blue light on them, because her [PC] tower does, and we want the speakers to match the tower."

So I show her the only pair we have with a blue LED, but note that they sound BAD...not good at all. Tell her she's basically throwing her money away.

She bought them anyway.

 

[Coquito]

Customer: Where's the beer?
Me: We don't sell beer.
Customer: Oh... got any cigs?
Me: Nope.
Customer: Ehh...
Me: Vodka?
Customer: Cool.

There was something else about a Romanian guy talking down to me when I was sent over to talk about his countries' $4 wines. I wasn't experienced enough to see the obvious quality it seems.

 

[BriGy86]

Originally posted by: cain
now i am seriously thinking about retail ahaha. i work from 8:30-5:30, and there is a compUSA nearby where I live. hmmm...

i wouldn't suggest working in retail if you don't have to

 

[MaverickBP]

Originally posted by: Keyvan
there are just way too many to think of off the top of my head...
..the only salvation to retail jobs is if you have good co-workers, because you can bet managers and customers are a PITA to deal with.

eh i was the manager so didnt have to deal with no one..and even before i became the manager...the manager liked my take no sh!t attitude, so gave me free reign

 

[Insomniak]

Originally posted by: murphy55d
I worked overnight in a Wal-Mart Supercenter for 3 and a half years, one time, a large woman in one of the electric Mart-Carts decided to relieve herself in front of the milk cooler doors. Didn't get up, just kept on going in the scooter, leaving a nice little trail behind her.

Best.

 

[BriGy86]

Originally posted by: Insomniak

Originally posted by: murphy55d
I worked overnight in a Wal-Mart Supercenter for 3 and a half years, one time, a large woman in one of the electric Mart-Carts decided to relieve herself in front of the milk cooler doors. Didn't get up, just kept on going in the scooter, leaving a nice little trail behind her.

Best.

i've also heard stories of people smearing sh!t on bathroom walls

i'd like to shoot people like that

 

[RegularK]

Originally posted by: virtueixi
Manager made me walk this crackhead out of the pharmacy, I had to touch her arm and everything. She could barely walk straight. I was 17 at the time, now I would have told him to f off. I was only getting paid $6 an hour.

That reminds me of this one time when a crackwhore tried to shoplift from our store. She was a literal CRACK WHORE--while we were interrogating her in the office, the manager found a crackpipe in her bag and she asked if anything would happen to her for existing warrants for her arrest (for prostitution).

I work in a retail pharmacy and as much as I dislike my job, I do have a good story or two. A long time ago, some guy dropped off a prescription for a water pill (Hydrochlorathiazide) that was crossed out and written over it was Hydrocodone. We told the guy we were going to call the cops and he acted all innocent--"What? They're not the same thing? I didn't know I couldn't change it." What a loser. *I probably have a million pain medication/forgery stories*

We had this lady go crazy on us. It was for her husband's pain medication and it was too soon to fill. She starts yelling and cussing, and the man behind her has a young child with him. He politely tells her that there are children in her presence and for her to calm down and she just blurts out, "FVCK YOU AND YOUR KID!" --Not sure if that was before or after she clawed one of our assistant managers...Needless to say, we have a restraining order against her and she can only get prescriptions through our Drive Thru.

Back when I used to work at a retail clothing store, people would leave dirty diapers in the fitting rooms all the time. In addition to dirty diapers, people would feel the need to go to the bathroom in our fitting rooms...number 1 or number 2...take your pick. And the worst part is that they'd try to cover it up with the clothes they had tried on. Freaking disgusting.

 

[murphy55d]

Originally posted by: BriGy86

Originally posted by: Insomniak

Originally posted by: murphy55d
I worked overnight in a Wal-Mart Supercenter for 3 and a half years, one time, a large woman in one of the electric Mart-Carts decided to relieve herself in front of the milk cooler doors. Didn't get up, just kept on going in the scooter, leaving a nice little trail behind her.

Best.

i've also heard stories of people smearing sh!t on bathroom walls

i'd like to shoot people like that

Yep, that has happened too. Never saw it myself as I was not maintenance, but I also heard stories of another...uhm.. bodily substance being smeared in the womens bathroom. Not going to get too descriptive, but let's just say had I been the one to clean it up, i'd have been seeing red.

 

[MaverickBP]

Originally posted by: Insomniak
Had a lady come into my employer one time looking for speakers. I take her to our selection, note that the Logitech models are the best we carry (we don't have a huge selection) and that they're comparably priced with everyone else. I recommended them because they sounded far better than the other stuff we had.

So she says "Well, do they have a blue light on them? I want them to have a blue light on them, because her [PC] tower does, and we want the speakers to match the tower."

So I show her the only pair we have with a blue LED, but note that they sound BAD...not good at all. Tell her she's basically throwing her money away.

She bought them anyway.

why did u edit out ur "head explodes comment"? it fit so well

 

[BriGy86]

Originally posted by: murphy55d

Originally posted by: BriGy86

Originally posted by: Insomniak

Originally posted by: murphy55d
I worked overnight in a Wal-Mart Supercenter for 3 and a half years, one time, a large woman in one of the electric Mart-Carts decided to relieve herself in front of the milk cooler doors. Didn't get up, just kept on going in the scooter, leaving a nice little trail behind her.

Best.

i've also heard stories of people smearing sh!t on bathroom walls

i'd like to shoot people like that

Yep, that has happened too. Never saw it myself as I was not maintenance, but I also heard stories of another...uhm.. bodily substance being smeared in the womens bathroom. Not going to get too descriptive, but let's just say had I been the one to clean it up, i'd have been seeing red.

may god have mercy on society if i were ever able to take care of people like that as i see fit

i would take pleasure in dragging them into the street and unloading a shot gun into their face

 

[RegularK]

Originally posted by: BobDaMenkey
I work at an old school game store. Board Games, card games, and a few electronic stand alone devices.

One such stand alone is terribly popular because it inflicts pain on the loser. It's called Lighting Reaction. The last person to hit the button on their handle gets a shock after the light turns green.

Someone in my store sold it to this lady. The lady came back the next day furious that we sold her a game that could hurt her son, and wanted to return it. I then explained to her our return policy.

We accept NO returns on ANY electronic game. Any return MUST BE in RESALEABLE condition (NO RIPS ect to the packaging). The game was functioning perfectly, and half of the packaging inside the clear plastic box was missing. I told her we couldn't take it back, and next time she should read the large warning lable on the front of the box.

An hour and a half later, her husband came into the store. He was screaming and yelling at us about how we were breaking the law ect and other stupid crap. He wanted us to take it back and give them their money back. We said no can do. I got the regional manager on the phone (This is on a sunday) to explain to him why. He wouldn't listen, and was slamming his hand on our glass counter top. We told him to take off. He said he was going to call the local news station about how our company was horrible and wouldn't let customers return games and how we sold dangerous games to little kids.

Needless to say it's been one of the funnier topics at my store for a good while. If he had carried on much longer security would have been called so we could laugh even more, as the little old man tried to get this pissed off guy out of the store.

I hate people like that, and the thing that sucks the most is they usually end up getting what they want AND MORE. If I was in charge, I'd say "NO SOUP FOR YOU!"

 

[BriGy86]

Originally posted by: RegularK

Originally posted by: BobDaMenkey
I work at an old school game store. Board Games, card games, and a few electronic stand alone devices.

One such stand alone is terribly popular because it inflicts pain on the loser. It's called Lighting Reaction. The last person to hit the button on their handle gets a shock after the light turns green.

Someone in my store sold it to this lady. The lady came back the next day furious that we sold her a game that could hurt her son, and wanted to return it. I then explained to her our return policy.

We accept NO returns on ANY electronic game. Any return MUST BE in RESALEABLE condition (NO RIPS ect to the packaging). The game was functioning perfectly, and half of the packaging inside the clear plastic box was missing. I told her we couldn't take it back, and next time she should read the large warning lable on the front of the box.

An hour and a half later, her husband came into the store. He was screaming and yelling at us about how we were breaking the law ect and other stupid crap. He wanted us to take it back and give them their money back. We said no can do. I got the regional manager on the phone (This is on a sunday) to explain to him why. He wouldn't listen, and was slamming his hand on our glass counter top. We told him to take off. He said he was going to call the local news station about how our company was horrible and wouldn't let customers return games and how we sold dangerous games to little kids.

Needless to say it's been one of the funnier topics at my store for a good while. If he had carried on much longer security would have been called so we could laugh even more, as the little old man tried to get this pissed off guy out of the store.

I hate people like that, and the thing that sucks the most is they usually end up getting what they want AND MORE. If I was in charge, I'd say "NO SOUP FOR YOU!"

thats one thing bad about capitalism

everything is ruled by the almighty dollar, and if you even want to do the RIGHT thing your business fails

or you get sued, or fined

 

[Queasy]

Originally posted by: BobDaMenkey
He said he was going to call the local news station about how our company was horrible and wouldn't let customers return games and how we sold dangerous games to little kids.

Needless to say it's been one of the funnier topics at my store for a good while. If he had carried on much longer security would have been called so we could laugh even more, as the little old man tried to get this pissed off guy out of the store.

So did you ever hear from the local news station?

 

[BriGy86]

when i worked at a scuba shop a lady was trying to figure out if the yellow on the snorkel matched the yellow on the fins

the thing is we only have 1 kind of yellow for each and they're both neon, so even if it didn't match its not like there is another yellow to pick

besides everyone looks stupid in snorkel gear anyways... and the fish don't care

 

[DrPizza]

Pizza shop... years ago, lots of people were always trying to scam us. (AFAIK, some of them still succeed with one of the managers)
Guy came in, was furious because his son was sick all weekend and had to go to the doctor. He doesn't have insurance and wanted us to pay for the doctor bill. Claimed it was food poisoning. "How do you know it was from our food?" "It was from a sub he got here. After he started getting sick, I took a taste of it and it tasted funny. <looks up at menu> I smelled it and the bacon had gone bad. " "Bacon?" "Yeah, it was bad bacon. I think he might have gotten trichinosis or something from it. " "What kind of sub was it?" "It was a turkey club" "And, the bacon in it was rotten?" "Yeah" "You're sure it was bacon?" "Yeah"<thinking he was making progress, starting to smile> "I see. However, our turkey club sub is made with turkey and ham, not bacon." "The guy must have made it wrong, because it was bacon." "Are you sure it was from our restaurant?" "Yeah" "You're sure your son didn't get the sub from someplace else?" "I picked it up myself." "You are the biggest *&(%^# to walk in here today. We don't have bacon here. We've NEVER had bacon here. And there's no way in hell your son's sub had bacon on it from us. We simply don't use bacon, ever. I ought to call the police and report you're trying to extort money from us." <customer's face is beat red as he walks out the door.>

Busting scammers is usually amusing... people who wanted a free pizza because the one they got was burnt. "What size did you get?" "I got the 16 inch one." "Round?" "Yeah." "Sorry, moron, all our pizza is made on rectangular sheets. We don't have round pizza. Go try to scam someone else."

Had an order that sat on the oven for about 15 minutes... (not unusual.) Customer called back. "where's my food?" "On top of the oven. Done. You can pick it up any time." "I wanted that delivered.<starting to sound beligerant> "Sorry, I didn't realize. 95% of our business is take-out, not delivery." "Well, deliver it to... Oh, and add a 2-liter of pepsi and 2-liter of mountain dew to that." Great... a delivery to the projects.. Since the customer seemed irate on the phone, I just delivered it myself. Got to the door, "39.90 please." "WHAT?!" "Your order came to $39.90" showed him the receipt. "The pop was supposed to be free" "Why would it be free?" "The manager on the phone said he'd add 2 bottles of pop to the order for free." "The manager didn't say that on the phone <I was the manager working that night, and it was ME on the phone he talked to.> "YOU CALLING ME A LIAR?" "No, you're just mistaken. I'm the manager and it was me on the phone." "Well, I better get those bottles of pop for free, because the delivery was late" <yelling quite loudly at me now.> "sorry, can't do that.> 2 more minutes of yelling at me, swearing, telling me how he's going to write a letter to the editor, how he's going to call his lawyer... Finally, "Look, I don't give 2 shits if you want this order or not. If you want the food, it's 35 even. If you want the pop, it's 39.90. If you want me to take it all back, I've got no problem with that, I'll be able to sell it within 5 minutes. " Guy pays for food, but not drinks, no tip (of course) I leave with the 2-liters. Not really funny at this point, but on my way home, I stopped at another pizza place (friends) and relate the story. Guy looked at me, started laughing, and said "we used to have a customer like that, but Dave started refusing to deliver to him this week. Let me guess, " and he told me the guys address.

 

[HomeBrewerDude]

During college I managed a putt-putt The place had a snack bar with a big 60 inch tv with cable. One day this dipshit comes in and orders a drink and changes the channel to MTV. Well, MTV wasn't a station we allowed during day hours, and so I told the guy as I change it back. Then he changed it again.
I patiently changed it back again and looked at him told him to leave the TV alone or I would kick him out or call the cops.

He asked me if I would say that if I knew he had a gun.

I was pissed a this point, and asked him if he did have a gun. He said not "with him" and starts to explain how he was a paying customer and had a right to watch his TV station. I explained to him that he would be arrested if he was still around when the cops showed up. He said we would see about that.

10 minutes later, the cops were taking him out to the car in cuffs.

 

[RegularK]

Originally posted by: DrPizza
Pizza shop... years ago, lots of people were always trying to scam us. (AFAIK, some of them still succeed with one of the managers)
Guy came in, was furious because his son was sick all weekend and had to go to the doctor. He doesn't have insurance and wanted us to pay for the doctor bill. Claimed it was food poisoning. "How do you know it was from our food?" "It was from a sub he got here. After he started getting sick, I took a taste of it and it tasted funny. <looks up at menu> I smelled it and the bacon had gone bad. " "Bacon?" "Yeah, it was bad bacon. I think he might have gotten trichinosis or something from it. " "What kind of sub was it?" "It was a turkey club" "And, the bacon in it was rotten?" "Yeah" "You're sure it was bacon?" "Yeah"<thinking he was making progress, starting to smile> "I see. However, our turkey club sub is made with turkey and ham, not bacon." "The guy must have made it wrong, because it was bacon." "Are you sure it was from our restaurant?" "Yeah" "You're sure your son didn't get the sub from someplace else?" "I picked it up myself." "You are the biggest *&(%^# to walk in here today. We don't have bacon here. We've NEVER had bacon here. And there's no way in hell your son's sub had bacon on it from us. We simply don't use bacon, ever. I ought to call the police and report you're trying to extort money from us." <customer's face is beat red as he walks out the door.>

Busting scammers is usually amusing... people who wanted a free pizza because the one they got was burnt. "What size did you get?" "I got the 16 inch one." "Round?" "Yeah." "Sorry, moron, all our pizza is made on rectangular sheets. We don't have round pizza. Go try to scam someone else."

Had an order that sat on the oven for about 15 minutes... (not unusual.) Customer called back. "where's my food?" "On top of the oven. Done. You can pick it up any time." "I wanted that delivered.<starting to sound beligerant> "Sorry, I didn't realize. 95% of our business is take-out, not delivery." "Well, deliver it to... Oh, and add a 2-liter of pepsi and 2-liter of mountain dew to that." Great... a delivery to the projects.. Since the customer seemed irate on the phone, I just delivered it myself. Got to the door, "39.90 please." "WHAT?!" "Your order came to $39.90" showed him the receipt. "The pop was supposed to be free" "Why would it be free?" "The manager on the phone said he'd add 2 bottles of pop to the order for free." "The manager didn't say that on the phone <I was the manager working that night, and it was ME on the phone he talked to.> "YOU CALLING ME A LIAR?" "No, you're just mistaken. I'm the manager and it was me on the phone." "Well, I better get those bottles of pop for free, because the delivery was late" <yelling quite loudly at me now.> "sorry, can't do that.> 2 more minutes of yelling at me, swearing, telling me how he's going to write a letter to the editor, how he's going to call his lawyer... Finally, "Look, I don't give 2 shits if you want this order or not. If you want the food, it's 35 even. If you want the pop, it's 39.90. If you want me to take it all back, I've got no problem with that, I'll be able to sell it within 5 minutes. " Guy pays for food, but not drinks, no tip (of course) I leave with the 2-liters. Not really funny at this point, but on my way home, I stopped at another pizza place (friends) and relate the story. Guy looked at me, started laughing, and said "we used to have a customer like that, but Dave started refusing to deliver to him this week. Let me guess, " and he told me the guys address.

During college I managed a putt-putt The place had a snack bar with a big 60 inch tv with cable. One day this dipshit comes in and orders a drink and changes the channel to MTV. Well, MTV wasn't a station we allowed during day hours, and so I told the guy as I change it back. Then he changed it again.

He asked me if I would say that if I knew he had a gun.

I was pissed a this point, and asked him if he did have a gun. He said not "with him" and starts to explain how he was a paying customer and had a right to watch his TV station. I explained to him that he would be arrested if he was still around when the cops showed up. He said we would see about that.

10 minutes later, the cops were taking him out to the car in cuffs.

You guys are awesome.

THIS also reminds me of the time we had someone refuse to leave the drive thru in the pharmacy. So we called the tow truck and they came and towed her car (if i'm not mistaken, while she was still in it)

 

[MmmSkyscraper]

I used to work at Safeway. One day I got a call to go to the security office. The store manager and security guard were in there with an old guy who'd nicked some cough sweets. They were waiting for the police to turn up and decided I could guard him cos I had nothing better to do? As the security guard walks out, he turns to me and says quietly "Oh yeah, it might get a bit whiffy in here cos the old boy wet himself when I collared him". Yeah thanks The guy ended up falling asleep so my ninja skills weren't required.

Another is with me as a customer at a different supermarket. Was just about to leave the checkout when a big guy started running for the doors. Some kid who was a bit too brave given his size got pushed out of the way and the guy keeps running. With that, it seems like every guy who works there is running for the door. By the time I made it into the car park there were 10 of them giving chase. One eventually caught up, went for his legs and he went down like a sack of spuds. Needless to say he got a nice beating before the police arrived

 

[MaverickBP]

I remember one christmas season..electronics section was slammed with people wanting items... Now we can only do so much and everyone gets their turn..but you gotta be patient. one lady didnt seem to understand that.

it was this ladies turn and i put my key in the lock to get her a video game...and she decided to speak..."about damn time..i thought i was gonna have to get on the table and start stripping to get any attention around here.." i locked the cage back up and said that sounded like a great idea..and walked away lol. shes like "i need a game damnt"...i pointed and said walmarts right down the street..and continued with the next guest

 

[labgeek]

A few stories...

High School working all night as a cashier/stock person for grocery store - guy comes in for change. I ask what "any particular combination?" He answer "whatever it takes..." He's obviously staggeringly drunk, not too unusual for Fri. night with the apt. complex behind the store. I gave him 4 quarters for a dollar. He comes back 5 minutes later and says "it won't work". After several minutes of prompting, I find out he's trying to put the change into the keyslot for his car to start it. I called one of the regular sherrif's deputies, and he get's a ride home...

Also at the grocery store, one guy acting strange late at night... Keeps opening bottles on the aisle with all the household cleaners. I'm watching the cameras, and see it a couple of times. Before I can get there... He opens one bottle takes a huge whif, and falls out cold. Turns out he can't read, and was trying to figure what to buy from the smell.

At a toy store during college, one "lady" drops off her monster ever Saturday morning so we can babysit while she shops. We put up with it for a while, even though it was kind of irritating. But one morning, I turn the corner and there's little Jimmy shoving a GI Joe down his pants... I haul him off to the back room, and call mall security. Call up to the front to tell the cashier to call me when she shows up. Over an hour later she does, (little Jimmy is bawling the whole time, and about to wet himself). She comes to the back, and I explain the situation and ask that she never drop him off again and pay for the toy he opened. Told her that he is now required to be escorted by an adult when in the store. She takes this attitude that "Little Jimmy would never do that", "she's not paying for anything" and (the part I loved) "I'll drop him off anytime I see fit". I restated that I caught him red handed, and no she wouldn't. She insisted she would. Well security was still there. They took her and him, charged him with shoplifting, and barred both of them from mall permanently. They were summoned to court, and if they went back to the mall it would be criminal tresspass. Why can't people take a reasonable deal when caught?

Used to get fun phone calls there too... 1 number off from a chinese food place. They'd call right back when we'd tell them they have the wrong number, and even give them the right one. We'd just take the order at that point.

1 call in particular though... Another similar sounding store name opened right before Christmas. Because of the similar names, directory assistance would often given our number instead of theirs. We get a call, she asks for the "swingset department" I explain we don't have one we're too small. "We're a small store in a mall, we have no room for them" (The other is a mega store - the one with the giraffe). She insists we do. I explain it again. She tells me "you don't know what you're talking about... I've seen them there. Put someone on the phone right now that knows your products". I quietly explain that 1) I'm the manager, 2) that I do the ordering and a good bit of the stocking and 3) there is no room for room... She goes balistic... Rants and raves up and down about how she's going to come down and show them to me. I finally just hang up. I wonder if she ever showed up asking for the manager??

 

[Nevada]

i used to work at staples many moons ago. there was a customer that was pretty irrate with one of my co-workers. the guy began following my co-worker around the department and then purposely rammed his shopping cart into my co-worker.