Stupid things your significant other says/does while sleeping?

[Maleficus]

I sometimes do tae kwon do in my sleep, actually its only happened once some friends were staying over and i fell asleep and they continue to watch the movie well they all freaked out cause all of a sudden i started screaming and punching and kicking doing forms in my sleep heh. pretty funny.

 

[SarcasticDwarf]

as for my parents:

A couple years ago my mom had a dream and was really pissed off at my dad in it.

(a bit of background: My parents NEVER swear - even the word butt is considered swearing).

My mom woke up in the morning, looked at my dad, and said "you ass"

 

[MichaelD]

Originally posted by: Maleficus
I sometimes do tae kwon do in my sleep, actually its only happened once some friends were staying over and i fell asleep and they continue to watch the movie well they all freaked out cause all of a sudden i started screaming and punching and kicking doing forms in my sleep heh. pretty funny.

Ahahahahahahaha! Oh, that's rich! Best laugh I've had all damn day.

 

[nativesunshine]

He likes to smack his lips together....kinda like he's eating something yummy. And recently he's started to snore...LOUD. Yep.

 

[Spoooon]

Originally posted by: freesia39
my first year in college, i had a roommate that would often mumble in spanish in her sleep... my second year my roommate mumbled in mandarin, and my third year she mumbled in cantonese.

i only understood what was said my third year. hehe

My roommate's native language is spanish. One night he jumped out of bed because of some loud noise. I got out of bed and met him in the hallway. He started asking me questions in spanish. I said "what?" Then he said it again in spanish, then he started yelling at me in spanish because I couldn't understand what he was saying. He finally woke up enough to realize what was going on.

 

[BD231]

I've cought my brother talking in his sleep MANY times, the oddest one I remember was him singing the theme song to the Peter Pan cartoon. "I can fly I can fly I can fly I can fly I can flyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy". He also kicks the wall next to his bed all the time, I think he's trying to run or something .

 

[slydecix]

my roommate last year told me that his pillows were broken

 

[Grasshopper27]

Thumper does not to the best of my knowledge talk, kick, or do anything in her sleep. She just lays there like a sack of potatos.

*I* on the other hand, do talk, kick, and otherwise make a ruckass of myself in bed, or so she tells me.

The worst was the two times I actually flat kicked her right out of bed, while we were asleep. Naturally she woke up when she hit the floor, and was less than pleased about it. The second time she actually let me keep sleeping, but she did move to the couch. The first time she woke me up and yelled at me.

*shrug*

I'm one of those fidgety sleepers, I don't stay still, I make a lot of noise, etc.

: ) Hopper

 

[dquan97]

Originally posted by: Hayabusarider
I once had a girlfriend and I forgot to put the seat down. She sleepwalked into the bathroom and sat down. I was asleep until I heard the blood curdling shreik. Seems the water was a bit cold and woke her up. Not pretty, especially since she was stuck and I had to pull her out.

hehehe...good thing she didnt drop the kids off...

 

[Raiden256]

My wife's a resident physician, and typically goes to bed relatively early. Many, many times she has come out after an hour or so and our conversation ends up like this:

Her: "Have you checked Mr. Smith's potassium level?"
Me: [Startled, as she's walked up behind me] "Wha?"
Her: "Is Mr. Smith's potassium level too low?"
Me: "Honey, I think you're asleep"

[long pause while her brain slowly figures out what's happening]

Her: "Good night."
Me: "'Night!"

It can get really entertaining sometimes. She'll actually argue with me... ( "No! Just check his level!")

 

[CrackRabbit]

my gf often twitches in her sleep, the first couple of times it really freaked me out thought she was having a seizure or something. ended up waking her up to make sure she was ok. she also often steals all the bed (by slowly scooting over towards me) and eventualy boots me off the bed. I usualy have to get up and go sleep on the other side.

 

[Aves]

I won't even go there.

 

[ElFenix]

my cat will somehow take up half the bed

and then she'll leave

and then she'll come back and want back in bed so she'll wake me up until i pick her up

and then she'll slap me in the face with her tail

damn cat

 

[SuepaFly]

My guy always apologizes or says "excuse me" when he turns. But thats about it.

When I was overseas I had to share a room with 5 othergirls and as I was walking by one of the girls she yells out my name and says "I am SOOOOO cool. Alright, alright, I gotta go, you are such a dork, I have to go..." Like it was a phone conversation.

 

[Storm]

This is a really funny thread... We have nachos, martial arts, blood pressure checks.

I sleep like a rock, no soring, no kicking, no scooting.

 

[mangoluvr]

2 weeks ago my baby nephew was sleeping with me and out of the blue headbud me smack dab in the middle nose full force. couldn't sleep for an hour. stupid little twinkie

 

[mangoluvr]

and you wanna know why asians have flat noses

 

[EvilYoda]

LOL, great thread! First I thought it couldn't get better than "NACHOS!"...but then the TKD forms while asleep...

My last SO didn't do anything in her sleep, as far as I know...but heh, after the first year and a half, I guess I stopped sleeping only after she slept...I just became so comfortable around her that I'd fall asleep instantly. She didn't like that too much, actually.

My friend from HS used to speak Korean in his sleep...at band camp, with no other Korean's around, he was talking/yelling, and nobody had a clue what he was saying.

 

[Walleye]

so far as i know, i do/say absolutely nothing. i've never fell off a bed, i've never woke up somewhere else in the house. and i sleep alone, so noone tells me i do anything. so, im okay. you all are freaks

 

[Swag1138]

The funniest I ever heard was a friend of mine was sleeping, and his wife got up to go to the bathroom, and when she opened the door, it woke him up and he jumped up out of the bed screaming "HOLY HELL, ASSASSINS!!!!"

 

[Mill]

My old roommate spoke Spanish in his sleep. He would also sometimes grab me by the arm and say "damn dude I was thinking in spanish again." The only Spanish I ever learned from him was swear words.

 

[ElFenix]

Originally posted by: Millennium
My old roommate spoke Spanish in his sleep. He would also sometimes grab me by the arm and say "damn dude I was thinking in spanish again." The only Spanish I ever learned from him was swear words.

puta!

 

[eakers]

hehe a friend of a friend of mine sat up mid sleep and goes "i wonder what the difference between 3 and 5 are...besides the obvious numerical values"
then layed back down and went sleep

HAHAHa

 

[Jittles]

Not my SO, but me. One morning I woke up and went to roll out of bed and there was a book on the edge of the bed. I was like "wtf?" I pull back the covers and everything, books, kleenex box, clothes. Apparently in the middle of the night I got up and put everything in bed and crawled back in. I then recalled something strange. I woke up in the middle of the night because I was ON A FREAKIN BOOK, so I move MYSELF over instead of throwing the book out. I have no clue why I did that, or what was going on, but it was worth a really good laugh in the morning

 

[Mill]

Originally posted by: ElFenix

Originally posted by: Millennium
My old roommate spoke Spanish in his sleep. He would also sometimes grab me by the arm and say "damn dude I was thinking in spanish again." The only Spanish I ever learned from him was swear words.

puta!

Chupe muy huevos bendeho.

Now that is supposed to say lick my balls fvc*ker but I am not sure if I have the correct spelling or words. That was the main phrase I learned.