Social Progress!

[Chromagnus]

That's great, but your social circle is not representative of the experience of young Americans. The data that I've seen suggests that millenials are poorer, burdened by more debt, and have worse career prospects than their parents.

I don't disagree with you at all. We are definitely poorer and have more debt. I was just saying that the people I know are citing different reasons than finances for why they aren't getting married.

 

[Stokely]

I sure hope to hell that my kids--if they end up getting married--don't get one of these women who demand a crazy-ass-expensive wedding. Or worse, her mom demands it (I saw this with my brother). What a giant fucking waste of money. You can have a nice ceremony without spending more than a down payment on a nice house (which would be a FAR better way to spend that money).

 

[SMOGZINN]

What really makes me wonder is (long term) how is the human body going to adapt to this shit?

Humans were made to be fertile and start pumping out babies at 14-18 being the PRIME years. Now that we have people getting married and forcing kids through IVF/IUI in their 30's / 40's - That has definitely gotta screw with the basic human biology that we were originally built for. Interesting times no doubt -

However, as far as divorces I would take this with a grain of salt. I'm sure the average marriage for boomers lasted a certain numbers of years before the divorce kicks in, I'm betting that millennials haven't yet hit that anniversary where they give up and seek a divorce.

These sorts of trends change to fast to have any effect on biology. For this to change biology it would have to stick around for tens of thousands of years, this pattern will probably change again in 20 years.

But, if this pattern did stick around it would probably lead to later onset of menopause and perhaps a slightly longer lifespan as all that matters is who gets to reproduce. Those that can still reproduce later in life will have a slight advantage and so over long enough periods of time that would become more prevalent.

 

[Commodus]

Is my sarcasm meter broken or is this serious?

I believe the argument is that the first marriage is often the poorly thought-out one, the one driven by horniness, by societal pressures... or, let's be honest, by unintended pregnancies. You hook up with someone you're only kinda-sorta compatible with, and those conflicts that were small quibbles at first eventually become these massive obstacles that lead to a divorce.

The second marriage is when you find someone that genuinely syncs up, who's actually prepared to be with you for the rest of your life. It's not so much about compromise or settling as it is being a mature adult who's done fighting over whose turn it is to take out the trash.

 

[Josephus312]

What really makes me wonder is (long term) how is the human body going to adapt to this shit?

Humans were made to be fertile and start pumping out babies at 14-18 being the PRIME years. Now that we have people getting married and forcing kids through IVF/IUI in their 30's / 40's - That has definitely gotta screw with the basic human biology that we were originally built for. Interesting times no doubt -

However, as far as divorces I would take this with a grain of salt. I'm sure the average marriage for boomers lasted a certain numbers of years before the divorce kicks in, I'm betting that millennials haven't yet hit that anniversary where they give up and seek a divorce.

No species "adapt" to anything other than environmental changes (if possible). The adaptation going on in this case is in our society.

I don't think you understand any of what you are trying to imply here, human biology doesn't get screwed up with IVF/IUI, why would it?

 

[s0me0nesmind1]

No species "adapt" to anything other than environmental changes (if possible). The adaptation going on in this case is in our society.

I don't think you understand any of what you are trying to imply here, human biology doesn't get screwed up with IVF/IUI, why would it?

I don't think you understand. Humans aren't built to naturally reproduce in their 40s. Regardless of your bias' that is a fact. IVF and such circumvents that.

 

[Moonbeam]

We live in a competitive society and competition is hate. The mature of our society and how we destroy it is commensurate with how it is killing us. Hate creates division; love creates unity. Hate creates isolation; love creates community. Love and fear are incompatible mental states. I would say there is something to be said for a social safety net and progressive thinking, but the self hate that drives competition also finds self destruction via the destruction of our world very pleasing. It’s one way out of the pain.

 

[s0me0nesmind1]

We live in a competitive society and competition is hate. The mature of our society and how we destroy it is commensurate with how it is killing us. Hate creates division; love creates unity. Hate creates isolation; love creates community. Love and fear are incompatible mental states. I would say there is something to be said for a social safety net and progressive thinking, but the self hate that drives competition also finds self destruction via the destruction of our world very pleasing. It’s one way out of the pain.

When I read your post all I think of is hipster listening to John Lennon Imagine and Love dreaming of some utopia.

 

[ecogen]

When I read your post all I think of is hipster listening to John Lennon Imagine and Love dreaming of some utopia.

When the rest of us read your posts all we think is "oh, an idiot".

 

[Thump553]

Probably true, but in my family (including inlaws) the opposite is true. Of the baby boomers there are only two divorces (and one of those is 30+ years into the second marriage) while among the kids the divorce rate is probably 25%.

I think tangentially the article hit among the main point-many kids just aren't getting married. There used to be enormous social pressure to get married when children were involved, today much less. Personally I view marriage is a social and legal mechanism and not a religious one. I think the trend towards having kids and not getting married is a bad one, but the legal system is capable of adapting to it over time.

 

[Moonbeam]

When I read your post all I think of is hipster listening to John Lennon Imagine and Love dreaming of some utopia.

Good, now read my sig and ask yourself if you've ever been experienced:

If you can just get your mind together
Then come on across to me
We'll hold hands and then we'll watch the sunrise
From the bottom of the sea

But first, are you experienced?
Have you ever been experienced?
Well, I have

I know, I know you probably scream and cry
That your little world won't let you go
But who in your measly little world
Are you trying to prove that
You're made out of gold and, eh, can't be sold

So, are you experienced?
Have you ever been experienced?
Well, I have

Let me prove you...

Trumpets and violins I can hear in distance
I think they're calling our names
Maybe now you can't hear them, but you will
If you just take hold of my hand

Oh, but are you experienced?
Have you ever been experienced?
Not necessarily stoned, but beautiful...

 

[Perknose]

When I read your post all I think of is hipster listening to John Lennon Imagine and Love dreaming of some utopia.

Well, it's a promising start for you, anyway.

 

[Moonbeam]

“Perknose likes this.” Was done with you in mind.

 

[child of wonder]

Basically millennials want big, expensive weddings, can't afford them, don't get married, and complain that weddings are too expensive?

My wife and I got married in a banquet hall with a Justice of the Peace while I was a full time college student who worked part time and she worked as a full time bank teller. We fed 100+ guests turkey and mashed potatoes and had a DJ all to the tune of $5,000, including our wedding rings, wife's wedding dress, and my tux.

But clearly I was only able to do this and millennials cannot due to "inequality."

 

[Chromagnus]

Basically millennials want big, expensive weddings, can't afford them, don't get married, and complain that weddings are too expensive?

My wife and I got married in a banquet hall with a Justice of the Peace while I was a full time college student who worked part time and she worked as a full time bank teller. We fed 100+ guests turkey and mashed potatoes and had a DJ all to the tune of $5,000, including our wedding rings, wife's wedding dress, and my tux.

But clearly I was only able to do this and millennials cannot due to "inequality."

I'm really glad we could find a way to $hit on millenials in a thread about how they have lower divorce rates than prior generations. I also hear they are ruining the world by getting rid of straws and putting bad chain restaurants out of business. Oh the horror.

 

[Gryz]

Poor people can't afford healthcare.
Poor people can't afford a proper education.
Now poor people can't afford to get married.

Way to go US !
Almost there.

 

[dasherHampton]

I believe the argument is that the first marriage is often the poorly thought-out one, the one driven by horniness, by societal pressures... or, let's be honest, by unintended pregnancies. You hook up with someone you're only kinda-sorta compatible with, and those conflicts that were small quibbles at first eventually become these massive obstacles that lead to a divorce.

The second marriage is when you find someone that genuinely syncs up, who's actually prepared to be with you for the rest of your life. It's not so much about compromise or settling as it is being a mature adult who's done fighting over whose turn it is to take out the trash.

This articulates what I meant fairly well.

I saw far too many young people in the the town I grew up in get married too soon. They were young, and it was just "something you do".

A guy I know is STILL in a f^&ked up first marriage, after all of these years. They kept on having kids as if that would solve their problems. Now they fracking hate each other and are trapped on that inevitable dead end path: he makes like $40,000 a year, she works part time, they have no money, and there is no escape.

He's f%^ked.

She's f^&ked.

The kids are f^&ked (the oldest kid, a daughter, is already married at 20)

They're all f%^ked.

If they had just stayed girlfriend and boyfriend and let the relationship run it's course (or at least gotten divorced before the damage was irreversible) their lives could have taken turns for the better. Now there's no hope that I can see.

If people are wising up and skipping that idiotic first marriage it really is progress.

 

[s0me0nesmind1]

I'm really glad we could find a way to $hit on millenials in a thread about how they have lower divorce rates than prior generations. I also hear they are ruining the world by getting rid of straws and putting bad chain restaurants out of business. Oh the horror.

Again, lack of divorce can be attributed to the fact that they marry much later to begin with. Majority of marriages have a certain range of time before shit falls apart. In addition it also seems to correlate with how the economy is doing... so wait until the next recession that should be around the corner.

What I'm saying is... give it time Millenials will make themselves out to be just like previous generations as far as divorce, telling people to get off their lawns, voting republican, etc...

 

[s0me0nesmind1]

Basically millennials want big, expensive weddings, can't afford them, don't get married, and complain that weddings are too expensive?

My wife and I got married in a banquet hall with a Justice of the Peace while I was a full time college student who worked part time and she worked as a full time bank teller. We fed 100+ guests turkey and mashed potatoes and had a DJ all to the tune of $5,000, including our wedding rings, wife's wedding dress, and my tux.

But clearly I was only able to do this and millennials cannot due to "inequality."

I think ours totalled ~$17k - but that was for EVERYTHING.

Rented a lakehouse with a DJ. Bought food from a local restaurant. Hired a catering company to serve it and pour people drinks. Flowers, Rings, Dress, Tux AND that also includes honeymoon (flight+hotels - significant chunk of it)

It's easy to do a wedding if you just put in the work and learn that you can do shit yourself such as make the wedding invites, make the decorations, etc.. etc..

 

[nickqt]

Again, lack of divorce can be attributed to the fact that they marry much later to begin with. Majority of marriages have a certain range of time before shit falls apart. In addition it also seems to correlate with how the economy is doing... so wait until the next recession that should be around the corner.

What I'm saying is... give it time Millenials will make themselves out to be just like previous generations as far as divorce, telling people to get off their lawns, voting republican, etc...

Nope.

Millenials are less lead-poisoned than the Gen-Xers and especially the Baby boomers. Lower crime, lower substance abuse, lower teen pregnancy, etc.

More functional hardware, paired with increasingly better software, minus the requisite hiccups inherent in our political system.

 

[Perknose]

Again, lack of divorce can be attributed to the fact that they marry much later to begin with. Majority of marriages have a certain range of time before shit falls apart.

Dude, you completely miss the point that they marry later when they know themselves and what they want and who they want to a far greater degree. Marrying becomes less stupidly hormone driven and more of a conscious, more fully informed choice. How can you not know that?

 

[s0me0nesmind1]

Dude, you completely miss the point that they marry later when they know themselves and what they want and who they want to a far greater degree. Marrying becomes less stupidly hormone driven and more of a conscious, more fully informed choice. How can you not know that?

Broceritops, Brochacho, Brolociraptor, you completely miss the point that as of right now millennials are between the ages of 22 - 36. If you MARRY LATER IN LIFE what do you think that ALSO pushes down?

(Hint: It means the DIVORCE OCCURS LATER IN LIFE as well you incompetent fool. Instead you're too busy convincing yourself of drivel that because they married later that equates to being "smarter" in how they select their marriage partner. Keep dreaming fool. Age has nothing to do with the divorce rate, as seen by folks that marry/divorce 3+ times all the way through their 50s+)

Watch the next recession hit (within the next 2 years) and see that divorce rate sky-rocket. I mean for fucks sake, it's already been proven that generations generally repeat previous generations - as they age, they make the same trends as previous ones. But you keep thinking Millenials are your special little snowflakes.

 

[Moonbeam]

“Perknose likes this.” Was done with you in mind.

I realized I should maybe make it clear that you and beautiful was what I had in mind.

 

[SMOGZINN]

Nope.

Millenials are less lead-poisoned than the Gen-Xers and especially the Baby boomers.

Don't be so sure. Boomers removed the lead from the paint but put it in the water.