So, what do you and your SO argue about the most?

[y2kc]

Originally posted by: welst10

Originally posted by: y2kc

Originally posted by: Kenazo

Originally posted by: y2kc
my spouse (soon to be ex) argued mostly about our religious differences. she came into the marriage without any affiliations but became "born again" 4 years in. everything that was out of whack in our relationship was my fault because i wasn't a christian... oh well.

I'm curious, is it an issue to her or to you? If it's her issue, she's not following her bible too closely:

1 Corinthians 7:12:
To the rest I say this (I, not the Lord): If any brother has a wife who is not a believer and she is willing to live with him, he must not divorce her.

it's an issue to her. she asked me to leave. i'd long ago decided to respect her "walk", the titheing (sp), the church visits 4 and 5 times a week (at times), her devotion to the church over her family, etc. I'm glad it's over, she had more respect for her pastor than me or our family. For instance: she gets up early every saturday to help clean the church but rarely took the time to get it done with the same regularity at home.

she knows that scripture but told me that it didn't apply to us as "our marriage wasn't ordained by a "man of God" (her pastor).


Edit: Good riddance, if she's an example of Christian womanhood, the church has problems.

if you really love her, you should convert.

Convert to what???!!! a church that;

1. told it's members to let the utility company turn the gas off in the winter because the pastor needed the money

2. forces you to call the pastor "Dad"

3. spanks the children in front of the entire denomination

4. convinced it's members to invest in a known pyramid scheme (after the pastor joined of course so he gets a piece of their action)

I could go on and on but i'd rather not. know the facts before you open your yap.

 

[TwinkleToes77]

Originally posted by: mavs55
me working too much

his working too much.. he even works when hes home.

Oh, and the things he wants to spend money on are important but when I want to spend money on something its a 'waste'

 

[Gravity]

Sex, religiou, roles of the husband and wife, age appropriate kid chores, my computer time (just negotiated that yesterday) and money.

Gee, what's left?

 

[Ogg]

Originally posted by: Lola

Originally posted by: welst10

Originally posted by: Lola
right now its about stuff for our wedding. I never realized how stressful planning a wedding could be. And, in turn that stress is taken out on each other.
We "make up" and that usually makes it better!

i have trouble understanding what's the deal with wedding. Spending thousands of $ and months of time for that glamorous thing. Then half of them end up in divorce.

weddings, for most females, are a very important part of their lives. You are correct that half end in divorce, however, i am not a pesamist and i truly think that this is THE only time in both of our lives that we will host such a great party.

Plus, its a little bit different, we are not just getting married in our hometown, we are going away, so its a bit harder to plan something when you are 4k + miles away.
But, i truly enjoy planning it so its not a big deal.

Hey do we all get to go?

 

[Electric Amish]

my computer time (just negotiated that yesterday)

God! Did you marry your mother??

 

[Kenazo]

Originally posted by: y2kc

Originally posted by: welst10

Originally posted by: y2kc

Originally posted by: Kenazo

Originally posted by: y2kc
my spouse (soon to be ex) argued mostly about our religious differences. she came into the marriage without any affiliations but became "born again" 4 years in. everything that was out of whack in our relationship was my fault because i wasn't a christian... oh well.

I'm curious, is it an issue to her or to you? If it's her issue, she's not following her bible too closely:

1 Corinthians 7:12:
To the rest I say this (I, not the Lord): If any brother has a wife who is not a believer and she is willing to live with him, he must not divorce her.

it's an issue to her. she asked me to leave. i'd long ago decided to respect her "walk", the titheing (sp), the church visits 4 and 5 times a week (at times), her devotion to the church over her family, etc. I'm glad it's over, she had more respect for her pastor than me or our family. For instance: she gets up early every saturday to help clean the church but rarely took the time to get it done with the same regularity at home.

she knows that scripture but told me that it didn't apply to us as "our marriage wasn't ordained by a "man of God" (her pastor).


Edit: Good riddance, if she's an example of Christian womanhood, the church has problems.

if you really love her, you should convert.

Convert to what???!!! a church that;

1. told it's members to let the utility company turn the gas off in the winter because the pastor needed the money

2. forces you to call the pastor "Dad"

3. spanks the children in front of the entire denomination

4. convinced it's members to invest in a known pyramid scheme (after the pastor joined of course so he gets a piece of their action)

I could go on and on but i'd rather not. know the facts before you open your yap.

Yup, sounds like a cult. That isn't christianity (or at least not what I would call christianity).

 

[MacBaine]

We've never had an argument. Then again, we've only been going out for about a month.

 

[welst10]

Originally posted by: TwinkleToes77

Originally posted by: mavs55
me working too much

his working too much.. he even works when hes home.

did you make remarks like "it's be nice if you make more money"?

 

[dquan97]

Yup, sounds like a cult. That isn't christianity (or at least not what I would call christianity).

I'd agree...a pseudo-christianity.

 

[Lola]

Originally posted by: Ogg

Originally posted by: Lola

Originally posted by: welst10

Originally posted by: Lola
right now its about stuff for our wedding. I never realized how stressful planning a wedding could be. And, in turn that stress is taken out on each other.
We "make up" and that usually makes it better!

i have trouble understanding what's the deal with wedding. Spending thousands of $ and months of time for that glamorous thing. Then half of them end up in divorce.

weddings, for most females, are a very important part of their lives. You are correct that half end in divorce, however, i am not a pesamist and i truly think that this is THE only time in both of our lives that we will host such a great party.

Plus, its a little bit different, we are not just getting married in our hometown, we are going away, so its a bit harder to plan something when you are 4k + miles away.
But, i truly enjoy planning it so its not a big deal.

Hey do we all get to go?

LOL! we were thinking of "broadcasting" it over the web, but i dont think it would work!

 

[Baltazar325]

My SO and I dont argue. When she opens her mouth, I beat her.

 

[crab]

Originally posted by: MacBaine
We've never had an argument. Then again, we've only been going out for about a month.

 

[Jzero]

Originally posted by: welst10

Originally posted by: Lola
right now its about stuff for our wedding. I never realized how stressful planning a wedding could be. And, in turn that stress is taken out on each other.
We "make up" and that usually makes it better!

i have trouble understanding what's the deal with wedding. Spending thousands of $ and months of time for that glamorous thing. Then half of them end up in divorce.

Because there are so few opportunities in life to celebrate and so many opportunities to mourn or grouse. You should celebrate everything that is celebrable. Why not? Who cares if it ends in divorce? The party is about celebrating the wedding.

We celebrate births, yet every life is doomed to end in death. Why should the future be an excuse not to enjoy the present?

Of course we ought to celebrate death just as we celebrate birth, but that is a different post for a different thread.

My fiancee and I are kicking around the concept of having a wedding-like celebration every year because....why not? You can have a party in a reception hall fairly inexpensively and it's a great excuse to bring family and friends together just to have fun for a change.

To answer the original question, we hardly fight about much of anything....but then, we have only been togther <18 months

 

[TwinkleToes77]

Originally posted by: welst10

Originally posted by: TwinkleToes77

Originally posted by: mavs55
me working too much

his working too much.. he even works when hes home.

did you make remarks like "it's be nice if you make more money"?

i make remarks like he needs a new job.. but that was after a check bounced.. and hes salaried.

 

[Gravity]

Originally posted by: Kenazo
WTF!! what kind of stupid denomenation was she involved with? I find it sad when christians try to justify liberalism with legalism and their christiainity.

Or feminism.

 

[Kenazo]

Originally posted by: Lola

Originally posted by: Ogg

Originally posted by: Lola

Originally posted by: welst10

Originally posted by: Lola
right now its about stuff for our wedding. I never realized how stressful planning a wedding could be. And, in turn that stress is taken out on each other.
We "make up" and that usually makes it better!

i have trouble understanding what's the deal with wedding. Spending thousands of $ and months of time for that glamorous thing. Then half of them end up in divorce.

weddings, for most females, are a very important part of their lives. You are correct that half end in divorce, however, i am not a pesamist and i truly think that this is THE only time in both of our lives that we will host such a great party.

Plus, its a little bit different, we are not just getting married in our hometown, we are going away, so its a bit harder to plan something when you are 4k + miles away.
But, i truly enjoy planning it so its not a big deal.

Hey do we all get to go?

LOL! we were thinking of "broadcasting" it over the web, but i dont think it would work!

Sure it would. Get something like a D-Link DCS-1000. It is basically its own webserver. All you need then is an internet connection, and it can stream to its heart's content, no other computer needed.

 

[vi edit]

Originally posted by: mavs55
me working too much

Ditto.

I'm a work-a-holic. And responsible for a huge amount of stuff. I've got critical servers running over half the country and if one of them goes down it's my ass that has to get it fixed. She wants me to leave the job at home, but it's tough when you have so much stuff resting on your shoulders that need to be up and running 18 hours a day. Some days I just come home blasted and frustrated and just want to chill out but she wants to do stuff and I don't have the energy. So she gets mad at my work.

But I can't leave my job because we're a single income family until she graduates in a year.

So it's a catch 22. Need the job because it pays the bills. Hate's the job because it emotionally...and some days physically drains me.

 

[Gravity]

Originally posted by: Electric Amish

my computer time (just negotiated that yesterday)

God! Did you marry your mother??

LMAO, sorta. That's why we're in counseling.

 

[imported_vr6]

Me wanting to have sex more then she does, its gotten to the point where its by will or by force:Q

other then that, where to go when we go out.

 

[Kenazo]

Originally posted by: Kwan1
Me wanting to have sex more then she does, its gotten to the point where its by will or by force:Q

other then that, where to go when we go out.

you can still be charged w/ raping your GF/Wife. Don't be too forceful, she might end up resenting you for it.

 

[Lola]

Originally posted by: Jzero

Originally posted by: welst10

Originally posted by: Lola
right now its about stuff for our wedding. I never realized how stressful planning a wedding could be. And, in turn that stress is taken out on each other.
We "make up" and that usually makes it better!

i have trouble understanding what's the deal with wedding. Spending thousands of $ and months of time for that glamorous thing. Then half of them end up in divorce.

Because there are so few opportunities in life to celebrate and so many opportunities to mourn or grouse. You should celebrate everything that is celebrable. Why not? Who cares if it ends in divorce? The party is about celebrating the wedding.

We celebrate births, yet every life is doomed to end in death. Why should the future be an excuse not to enjoy the present?

Of course we ought to celebrate death just as we celebrate birth, but that is a different post for a different thread.

My fiancee and I are kicking around the concept of having a wedding-like celebration every year because....why not? You can have a party in a reception hall fairly inexpensively and it's a great excuse to bring family and friends together just to have fun for a change.

To answer the original question, we hardly fight about much of anything....but then, we have only been togther <18 months

WOW! you said what i was feeling!
Good for you, that is completely and utterly true. People either relish life and live it to the fullest or dread each day and regret missed oppertunities

 

[Isla]

His mother and his sister. They are poisonous, and mean to our kids! But honestly, we don't argue to much anymore. Ever since I learned to help him keep his wallet full and his balls empty, he's quite easy to get along with. :laugh:

 

[Isla]

Originally posted by: y2kc
my spouse (soon to be ex) argued mostly about our religious differences. she came into the marriage without any affiliations but became "born again" 4 years in. everything that was out of whack in our relationship was my fault because i wasn't a christian... oh well.

I can relate. I had to become a born again to marry my husband (being Catholic wasn't good enough.). But then I found out that I was ALWAYS going to be a second class citizen in his family of origin. They aren't very nice people. They weren't very nice to him either... his mom abused him growing up, and is still very rejecting.

So, he says he tried to save me but I ended up saving him.

 

[isasir]

Originally posted by: Isla
Ever since I learned to help him keep his wallet full and his balls empty, he's quite easy to get along with. :laugh:

:thumbsup: That's sig material right there.

 

[Ogg]

Originally posted by: Isla
His mother and his sister. They are poisonous, and mean to our kids! But honestly, we don't argue to much anymore. Ever since I learned to help him keep his wallet full and his balls empty, he's quite easy to get along with. :laugh:

:shocked:
:thumbsup:
Im falling for you more and more with each post