so really...if I can get paid to sit on my couch for 99 weeks....

[ussfletcher]

You cant collect if you are fired, or if you leave your job.

 

[spidey07]

btw, you need to get laid off not fired i think.

Not so. Learn the wisdom.

Peter Gibbons: Well see, they wrote all this bank software, and, uh, to save space, they used two digits for the date instead of four. So, like, 98 instead of 1998? Uh, so I go through these thousands of lines of code and, uh... it doesn't really matter. I uh, I don't like my job, and, uh, I don't think I'm gonna go anymore.
Joanna: You're just not gonna go?
Peter Gibbons: Yeah.
Joanna: Won't you get fired?
Peter Gibbons: I don't know, but I really don't like it, and, uh, I'm not gonna go.
Joanna: So you're gonna quit?
Peter Gibbons: Nuh-uh. Not really. Uh, I'm just gonna stop going.
Joanna: When did you decide all that?
Peter Gibbons: About an hour ago.
Joanna: Oh, really? About an hour ago... so you're gonna get another job?
Peter Gibbons: I don't think I'd like another job.
Joanna: Well, what are you going to do about money and bills and...
Peter Gibbons: You know, I've never really liked paying bills. I don't think I'm gonna do that, either.
Joanna: Well, so what do you wanna do?
Peter Gibbons: I wanna take you out to dinner, and then I wanna go back to my apartment and watch Kung Fu. Do you ever watch Kung Fu?

 

[spidey07]

You cant collect if you are fired, or if you leave your job.

Define "leave". What state you're in would help as well.

 

[zinfamous]

Define "leave". What state you're in would help as well.

leave = quit.

My understanding is that you have to be laid off and not willingly choose to stop earning money. That's the point of unemployment.

gee, spidey, you sure sound like a marxist lazy ass librul in this thread and nothing like We The People.

:hmm:

 

[spidey07]

leave = quit.

My understanding is that you have to be laid off and not willingly choose to stop earning money. That's the point of unemployment.

gee, spidey, you sure sound like a marxist lazy ass librul in this thread and nothing like We The People.

:hmm:

Sorry I didn't show up for work the last few weeks. I suffer from chronic fatigue syndrome (CFS). I called in every day, have a doctor's note, filed my paperwork. Are you firing me for medical reasons? If so then gimme my unemployment compensation or get sued. We'll make this real easy, you sign this that says you're firing me without cause (drafted by my attorney), will not contest unemployment and I won't sue you. Just sign it and we're done.

 

[WHAMPOM]

why not just get fired and ride the gravy train?

Would the government give me a house too?

No one would miss you. Please do it.

 

[x-alki]

You cant collect if you are fired, or if you leave your job.

Not entirely true. I fired a guy because he didnt show up for work and had a lousy work record when he was there. He got unemployment but it didnt come easy.

 

[Brainonska511]

I've honestly thought about running the numbers, getting divorced and just living together (we could live fine on one salary) and then taking advantage of all that free money, food stamps, welfare, healthcare, etc and just work on my golf game daily.

Then my dignity stops me. But don't think I'm kidding about pondering it.

I'd set up a different residence in the projects as my mailing address. If "poor people" and illegals can game the system, so can I.

Quoted for the record for the day you lose your reservations and decide to commit welfare fraud.

 

[zinfamous]

Sorry I didn't show up for work the last few weeks. I suffer from chronic fatigue syndrome (CFS). I called in every day, have a doctor's note, filed my paperwork. Are you firing me for medical reasons? If so then gimme my unemployment compensation or get sued. We'll make this real easy, you sign this that says you're firing me without cause (drafted by my attorney), will not contest unemployment and I won't sue you. Just sign it and we're done.

no, but you'd be put on disability instead. I'm pretty sure they'd offer disability before letting you sue them or collect unemployment through them.

 

[ussfletcher]

Define "leave". What state you're in would help as well.

I'm in Michigan, here you can also fire an employee for any reason.

 

[BoomerD]

BUT, getting "fired" doesn't automatically disqualify an employee from collecting UI benefits. In many states, there would be a formal hearing as to the cause of the dismissal, while other states merely make a few phone calls. Being fired "for cause" may prevent the employee from collecting...or may not, depending on the reason...and any documentation.

Rudie...if you think collecting is such a cake walk...do your own calculations:

UIA staff calculates how much you receive in unemployment benefits by
multiplying the highest amount of wages paid to you in any base period quarter by 4.1%. The UIA adds $6 for each
dependent you claim, up to five dependents. The weekly benefit amount is capped at $362.
To determine how many weeks of benefits you may receive, UIA multiplies your total base period wages by 43%, and
then divides that answer by your weekly benefit amount. The claim, however, cannot be less than 14 weeks or more than
26.

 

[2Xtreme21]

So just to recap of how "easy" it is to collect $400 a week unemployment per spidey:

Step 1) Stop coming to work for x amount of weeks so your work somehow doesn't put you on disability for your chronic fake condition and instead eliminates your position (thereby committing an egregious fault in the eyes of the government).

Step 2) Divorce your wife

Step 3) Set up a "fake address in the projects"

Step 4) Somehow convince your recently divorced wife to be the sole bread-winner, give her sole ownership of your house, change everything about it to her name, and expect her to be happy with her lazy, fat ass husband "working on his golf game." You also might need to convince your wife to get knocked up and birth a child while being the sole breadwinner so you can collect more unemployment, but if her one job somehow makes more than the threshold for unemployment, she'll have to quit that one job and find one that makes less.

Step 5) Wait in line at the unemployment office and explain steps 1 through 4.

Step 6) PROFIT!!! CHA-CHING!!

It's so easy guys!

 

[Schfifty Five]

In TX, u can be fired for things like performance issues and still qualify for unemployment.

 

[AgaBoogaBoo]

yeah, a lot are going John Galt

Who is John Galt?

 

[rudeguy]

I'm in Michigan, here you can also fire an employee for any reason.

correction

you can fire an employee for no reason

 

[rudeguy]

In TX, u can be fired for things like performance issues and still qualify for unemployment.

same here

If we get fired for attendance or something like fraud, then no unenjoyment. Poor performance=unenjoyment for sure.

 

[shortylickens]

Yea I'm not sure how they can be happy about it rudeguy. Once you get used to a certain lifestyle, it is hard to make $400/wk.

It is fun for the first two weeks, then you drive yourself crazy sitting at home during the day. I was on that boat 3 years ago, and I was going to blow my brains out if I saw one more car insurance or ITT Tech commercial.


Seems like they are trying to mentally cope with the fact that they are getting fired.

I've been out of work for well over two years now. I cope by using my GI Bill to go to school.
Of course school is more stressful than sitting around, so I cope with that at the gun range and just recently, the archery range.

Also, I apparently enjoy tranny pron.
:\

 

[Engineer]

Those "so called" conservatives in this thread who cry like babies about big government and wanting lower taxes and personal responsibility who would even think of gaming the system are hypocrites. Of course, it's never about personal responsibility...it's about greed...and it always has been.

Let's see if they get flamed by their fellow conservatives, some of whom flamed me for talking about severance and unemployment when I lost my job last year, flame these guys as well. Doubtful...

 

[spidey07]

So just to recap of how "easy" it is to collect $400 a week unemployment per spidey:

Step 1) Stop coming to work for x amount of weeks so your work somehow doesn't put you on disability for your chronic fake condition and instead eliminates your position (thereby committing an egregious fault in the eyes of the government).

Step 2) Divorce your wife

Step 3) Set up a "fake address in the projects"

Step 4) Somehow convince your recently divorced wife to be the sole bread-winner, give her sole ownership of your house, change everything about it to her name, and expect her to be happy with her lazy, fat ass husband "working on his golf game." You also might need to convince your wife to get knocked up and birth a child while being the sole breadwinner so you can collect more unemployment, but if her one job somehow makes more than the threshold for unemployment, she'll have to quit that one job and find one that makes less.

Step 5) Wait in line at the unemployment office and explain steps 1 through 4.

Step 6) PROFIT!!! CHA-CHING!!

It's so easy guys!

I took unemployment for 3 weeks until I found another job once in my 18 year professional career. No waiting in line, just do it online, got my check of about 430/week, that's a lot of golf there. Current laws say I can collect this 430/week for the next two years.

Then gimme food stamps, we could eat pretty well on that.

Then I qualify for reduced gas/electric/water prices.

Then gimme "free" medicaid so I don't burden my "domestic partner I don't live with" benefits.

Oh and my project housing is section 8, subsidized, me no pay no money. I'll stay one night a week there.

It actually IS THAT EASY, but I can't and won't do it.

 

[rudeguy]

Those "so called" conservatives in this thread who cry like babies about big government and wanting lower taxes and personal responsibility who would even think of gaming the system are hypocrites. Of course, it's never about personal responsibility...it's about greed...and it always has been.

Let's see if they get flamed by their fellow conservatives, some of whom flamed me for talking about severance and unemployment when I lost my job last year, flame these guys as well. Doubtful...

who flamed you? I wish I had seen that, I would love to bash on those idiots.

Unemployment happens. What concerns me is people being on it for so long. I realize that the job market sucks and it could possibly take a couple years to land a decent job. I just don't understand how people could possibly not want to work and contribute to society.

That being said...if my company offered me 6 months severance to quit tomorrow, I'd do it.

 

[2Xtreme21]

I took unemployment for 3 weeks until I found another job once in my 18 year professional career. No waiting in line, just do it online, got my check of about 430/week, that's a lot of golf there. Current laws say I can collect this 430/week for the next two years.

Then gimme food stamps, we could eat pretty well on that.

Then I qualify for reduced gas/electric/water prices.

Then gimme "free" medicaid so I don't burden my "domestic partner I don't live with" benefits.

Oh and my project housing is section 8, subsidized, me no pay no money. I'll stay one night a week there.

It actually IS THAT EASY, but I can't and won't do it.

I mean, do you want a cookie or something? Engineer said it exactly right. It's not about being personally responsible to you. It's about the fact that someone is getting something you're not entitled to. It amazes me that you hacks sit and defend corporate CEOs of health insurance and oil companies that make millions screwing over the average joes of the US, but you get your little pink panties in a bunch over some poor people getting something for nothing.

So fucking what. My taxes went down this year. The strain on you, spidey07, for random "unemployed person #1345" is about 1/300,000,000 of your unemployment compensation tax. And that almost negligible amount went to someone who could very well use it.

 

[RocksteadyDotNet]

Damn, this UI stuff is complex.

Here Unemployment Benefits == Welfare.

Anyone not working just gets the Dole. It's the same amount for everyone, whether you just got laid off, or if you've never worked a day in your life.

 

[OCGuy]

Damn, this UI stuff is complex.

Here Unemployment Benefits == Welfare.

Anyone not working just gets the Dole. It's the same amount for everyone, whether you just got laid off, or if you've never worked a day in your life.

Which is why our country has a $14.7 trillion GDP, and your country has a *insert number here* GDP.

We try and reward production, achievement, and hard work. Although to be fair, we do have a setion of society that is leeching off of the working man.

(I am not speaking about people who are actually using UI/welfare as a temporary means to get by between jobs).

 

[RocksteadyDotNet]

Which is why our country has a $14.7 trillion GDP, and your country has a *insert number here* GDP.

We try and reward production, achievement, and hard work. Although to be fair, we do have a setion of society that is leeching off of the working man.

(I am not speaking about people who are actually using UI/welfare as a temporary means to get by between jobs).

Wat.

 

[OCGuy]

Wat.

Zoomed right over you, huh?