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So I think I have a roommate problem. I've 'adopted' a third 'housemate'.
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zerocool84
Lifer
This concept seems to be gone from people but then we wouldn't have threads like this. Kind of like if people read their owners manuals and followed what they said, we'd have no threads in the Garage.
SooperDave
Senior member
gorcorps
aka Brandon
Let me get this straight... you were the one who moved in, and he was already living there correct? You also have only been there 7 months, yet he's been seeing this girl for 3 years correct? This is all stuff you said in your OP so I'm assuming it's right. That being the case, it sounds like YOU'RE the new one in this little triad which makes YOU the problem. You can't waltz in being the new guy and then start whining about stuff, especially to them. They were in their situation long before you got there.
If you had the nads to complain about such a thing to my face your shit would be on the curb.
GET
THE
FUCK
OVER
IT
If you had the nads to complain about such a thing to my face your shit would be on the curb.
GET
THE
FUCK
OVER
IT
Honestly, I'd say it's a dick move for the guy to look for another roommate if he has his girlfriend over that much without at least letting the potential new roommate know about the SO situation. If they're splitting utilities 50/50 but she's over there enough to realistically be considered a third roommate, then she needs to at least be paying her portion of rent + bills. With rent being split in half, I'd expect to be living in a situation with one other person the majority of the time, not two.
Talk to him/them about it. If they aren't willing to divvy the bills up appropriately, just move out and leave them with 100% of the expenses.
gorcorps
aka Brandon
Sounds like she's always with the roommate, so what energy is she using that he wouldn't be using by himself? Maybe some water. I'd understand the issue if she was over a lot without the roommate being there, but if she's always there with him it's not much difference.
NetWareHead
THAT guy
In my room mate days, one of them had a gf that started to spend a little too much time there. Here are some of the situations I came across:
1. When she would come over, they would cook together and then not clean the kitchen. My room mate doesnt cook, so he hardly uses the kitchen. But when she was over, the kitchen would get trashed and then not get cleaned. They would go nap or go out after using the kitchen. I asked him to keep the kitchen area clean but my words went on deaf ears. So when I would come home from work and see the kitchen dirty, it would mean that they had just cooked. I needed to cook myself dinner, but I shouldn't have to clean their mess first. So I just went into the fridge and helped myself to their food. Even if it was the last of what they had cooked, I would still finish it. I would clean my dishes and put them in the dishwasher and leave their mess alone. Later when my room mate would go looking for the food they made, I'd tell him I ate it and explain that the kitchen was unusable until it is cleaned. And since I won't cook in a filthy kitchen, any food is fair game.
2. I also stayed in my room alot when they occupied the living room and eventually I started too resent this. I shouldn't have to feel trapped or uncomfortable in my own place. So I started walking around in my boxers. I would cook, clean, eat in just boxers. She would see me and get uncomfortable and eventually my room mate asked me to put on clothes. I countered by saying that what Im wearing is no different that if we were at the beach and this is what I always did prior to her visiting. Eventually, they started to spend much more time in his room with the door shut.
3. This room mate had the annoying tendency that when his gf was over, he would ignore cleaning so to spend more time with her. One time he left this huge skid mark inside the toilet, I guess from flushing a giant turd. Which is the reason we have a toilet brush, to erase the skid mark after you flush. So I went to him and asked him if he saw the huge skid mark in the toilet that his gf left? ;-) I knew it was him but needed to find a way to embarrass him into cleaning it. I also asked him about it in a tone of voice where his gf would hear it and know she got blamed. Later on I heard her giving him crap that she got blamed for his stain. Well after that, he doesn't do that anymore and eventually started cleaning up.
I could tell many stories like this but this is all I can remember now... You just have to be on top of things from the beginning.
1. When she would come over, they would cook together and then not clean the kitchen. My room mate doesnt cook, so he hardly uses the kitchen. But when she was over, the kitchen would get trashed and then not get cleaned. They would go nap or go out after using the kitchen. I asked him to keep the kitchen area clean but my words went on deaf ears. So when I would come home from work and see the kitchen dirty, it would mean that they had just cooked. I needed to cook myself dinner, but I shouldn't have to clean their mess first. So I just went into the fridge and helped myself to their food. Even if it was the last of what they had cooked, I would still finish it. I would clean my dishes and put them in the dishwasher and leave their mess alone. Later when my room mate would go looking for the food they made, I'd tell him I ate it and explain that the kitchen was unusable until it is cleaned. And since I won't cook in a filthy kitchen, any food is fair game.
2. I also stayed in my room alot when they occupied the living room and eventually I started too resent this. I shouldn't have to feel trapped or uncomfortable in my own place. So I started walking around in my boxers. I would cook, clean, eat in just boxers. She would see me and get uncomfortable and eventually my room mate asked me to put on clothes. I countered by saying that what Im wearing is no different that if we were at the beach and this is what I always did prior to her visiting. Eventually, they started to spend much more time in his room with the door shut.
3. This room mate had the annoying tendency that when his gf was over, he would ignore cleaning so to spend more time with her. One time he left this huge skid mark inside the toilet, I guess from flushing a giant turd. Which is the reason we have a toilet brush, to erase the skid mark after you flush. So I went to him and asked him if he saw the huge skid mark in the toilet that his gf left? ;-) I knew it was him but needed to find a way to embarrass him into cleaning it. I also asked him about it in a tone of voice where his gf would hear it and know she got blamed. Later on I heard her giving him crap that she got blamed for his stain. Well after that, he doesn't do that anymore and eventually started cleaning up.
I could tell many stories like this but this is all I can remember now... You just have to be on top of things from the beginning.
darkewaffle
Diamond Member
Have sex with your roommate.
Also #3 above is awesome.
Also #3 above is awesome.
erikistired
Diamond Member
the problem here is obviously you. it's your home, not hers. if she has a problem with you walking around in your boxers, it's HER PROBLEM. she can always leave. if she complains to your roommate, set his ass straight.
also, the bitching about the shower part is stupid. i've always showered at other people's houses. nobody complains. if they just got done screwing she probably wants to feel fresh.
Last edited:
man, fuck you. if I was at a friend's place and my friend's room mate insisted I go home and shower when I really needed to shower then I would definitely flip out and pour tobasco sauce in your eyes
NetWareHead
THAT guy
I dont think its a problem to shower at someone else's place, just clean up after yourself. I have gotten pissed off and spoken up when the gf hogged the bathroom for hours to do her hair or decided to take a shower before I had to leave for work which screwed up my morning schedule. Now she asks when she wants to use the bathroom and waits until I leave for work before showering.
you're being a little unreasonable... I mean, the shower thing? really?
if I sleep over somewhere, whether it's a friend's house or my boyfriend's house, chances are good that I'm going to shower the next morning, unless I'm rushing out the door and don't have time.
she's his girlfriend, they've been dating for 3 years, and you're the one who moved in with him. it should be accepted that she's going to be spending time over there.
that said, if it's an excessive amount of time, just talk to your roommate about it and see if you can work out a compromise.
or just move into your own place.
if I sleep over somewhere, whether it's a friend's house or my boyfriend's house, chances are good that I'm going to shower the next morning, unless I'm rushing out the door and don't have time.
she's his girlfriend, they've been dating for 3 years, and you're the one who moved in with him. it should be accepted that she's going to be spending time over there.
that said, if it's an excessive amount of time, just talk to your roommate about it and see if you can work out a compromise.
or just move into your own place.
BurnItDwn
Lifer
Dude, sounds like your issue is that you're too uncomfortable around your roomate's GF. Just act normal and do your normal business around her. Treat her like a normal person. If she doesn't want to see you in your boxers than she can close her eyes. Also, if the time she takes a shower is a problem, talk to her and tell her you always shower at X time, and ask that she please consider showering before or after that time when she's visiting...
Patranus
Diamond Member
And if you stopped acting so weird maybe you could enjoy her company and meet some of the friends.
dabuddha
Lifer
skyking
Lifer
Much like "good"<hurl, spew chunks> Reality TV, Life and these posts would be boring without the DRAMA!
simonizor
Golden Member
Get over yourself. It's his gf, he's paying his half of the rent, he can have whoever the fuck over he wants, he can give a copy of his key to whoever the fuck he wants, he can have whoever the fuck he wants stay over night, he can have whoever the fuck he wants use the shower, he can have whoever the fuck he wants do pretty much anything other than touch your stuff.
Got a problem with it? Move out or get the fuck over it. There's nothing you can do, legally or morally. It's YOU who is the problem here.
Got a problem with it? Move out or get the fuck over it. There's nothing you can do, legally or morally. It's YOU who is the problem here.
Um, no... Roommates have to respect one another. You should go out of your way to make sure you are not stepping on someones toes. His roommate should be asking: Is it cool with you if my girl spends the night a few times a week? Is it ok if I give the key out to one of my buddies?
When I lived with someone, I had guns, computers, etc in my room. My roommate and owner of the house decided to rent out to a known drug addict and thief. He should have asked me if it was ok. It was not. I would never live with a known thief and drug addict, especially when I had guns in my room. Not ok in my book.
I moved out because of it. A month later he calls me asking me to move back because the guy never paid him rent. I'm like "No shit, why did you have him move in to begin with? You alienated your paying customer with a dirt bag, and got left with nothing but trouble."
Granted OP can leave if he doesn't like it... And probably should, but to say that it's ok for this guy to do whatever, it is not... I don't care if he owns the house or not... There is just things you have to respect when you have living arrangements. The first, is making sure everybody is ok with a change in the situation (having this girl over every night). Sure, its ok to have your girlfriend over, but not move in unofficially.
M0oG0oGaiPan
Diamond Member
move out
Barfo
Lifer
pics?
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