TWO WEEKS on the counter (vs. the fridge?) Are you mental?
Here are 10 easy steps on how to really 'tear' yourself up:
1. Grab a handful of shredded cheese out of the fridge.
2. Place cheese on counter.
3. Grab pepperoni out of fridge.
4. Place on counter.
5. Grab a slice of bread.
6. Place on counter.
7. Smear some sauce on the counter for the heck of it.
8. Cover mess with a piece of cardboard. (Any cardboard box will do)
9. Leave for two weeks.
10. At the end of two weeks, lick the mess up.
Bonus step #11: Make sure you have a toilet and a trash can handy.
