Redneck pick up lines for VALENTINES DAY

[Brutuskend]

1) Did you fart?
cuz you blew me away.

2) Are yer parents retarded?
cuz ya sure are special.

3) My Love fer you is like diarrhea
I can't hold it in.

4) Do you have a library card?
cuz I'd like to sign you out.

5) Is there a mirror in yer pants?
cuz I can see myself in em.

6) If you in I were Squirrels,
I'd store my nuts in yer hole.

7) You might not be the best lookin girl here,
but beauty's only a light switch away.

8) Man - "Fat Penguin!"
Woman - "WHAT?"
Man - "I just wanted to say something that would break the ice."

9) I know I'm not no Fred Flintstone,
but I bet I can make yer bed-rock.

10) I can't find my puppy, can you help me find him?
I think he went inta this cheap motel room.

11) Yer eyes are as blue as window cleaner.

12) If yer gunna regret this in the mornin,
we kin sleep til afternoon.

and.... the best for last!

13) Yer face reminds me of a wrench,
every time I think of it my nuts tighten up.

 

[MrDudeMan]

lol @ 13

 

[maximus maximus]

i lol'ed.

 

[j00fek]

:laugh:

 

[lobbyone]

lol

 

[imported_Cameron]

lol, I liked 13

 

[DaShen]

NICE!!!

 

[bamacre]

Hey, I have used a few of those!!

 

[Steve]

"Nice ass, get in the truck."

 

[AreaCode707]

Originally posted by: Brutuskend
8) Man - "Fat Penguin!"
Woman - "WHAT?"
Man - "I just wanted to say something that would break the ice."

LOL!!! I love that one!

 

[blurredvision]

Didn't you post these about a month ago? I remember because I got the same email, and was going to post them myself, but I saw someone else had already posted them hours before I got here.

Funny nonetheless :thumbsup:.

 

[SonnyDaze]

Originally posted by: sm8000
"Nice ass, get in the truck."

"...and I'll show ya why it's called a bed."

 

[TXHokie]

Your trailer or mine?

 

[illusion88]

Originally posted by: HotChic

Originally posted by: Brutuskend
8) Man - "Fat Penguin!"
Woman - "WHAT?"
Man - "I just wanted to say something that would break the ice."

LOL!!! I love that one!

:thumbsup:

 

[Quasmo]

Man with beard- "You ever kissed a man with a beard?"
Woman - no/yes
Man with beard- "Well I haven't, my name is..."

 

[munisgtm]

Awesome!:thumbsup:

 

[maximus maximus]

Originally posted by: Quasmo
Man with beard- "You ever kissed a man with a beard?"
Woman - no/yes
Man with beard- "Well I haven't, my name is..."

Quasmo... do you use that line?

 

[clamum]

Silly rednecks.

 

[Journer]

good ones...your southern dialect sucks though

 

[imported_nerve]

Are those space pants yer wearin'?

Cuz yer ass is outta this world

 

[DaShen]

"Baby, you are like the sun... because my whole world revolves around you."
"Baby, you are like the sun... because you light up my life."
"If you were an enzyme, I wish you would be helicase, because then you could unzip my genes."
"I wish I was your derivative, because then I could be tangent to your curve."
"I like ya... I like you a-lot." (snaps fingers and points)...

 

[DaShen]

If you were a booger, I'd pick you first.

 

[yosuke188]

Are you black? Because you just stole my heart.

 

[Jeff7]

4) Do you have a library card?
cuz I'd like to sign you out.
Oh wait, ah caynt read.


7) You might not be the best lookin girl here,
but beauty's only a light switch away.
Oops, no lectricitay neither.


11) Yer eyes are as blue as window cleaner.
11.1) Yer eyes are bluer than the water in the 7-11 urinals.

Originally posted by: yosuke188
Are you black? Because you just stole my heart.

Response: Oh, you're white? Hm, too bad. Better luck next time, Tiny.

 

[Perknose]

Nice tooth!