-
We’re currently investigating an issue related to the forum theme and styling that is impacting page layout and visual formatting. The problem has been identified, and we are actively working on a resolution. There is no impact to user data or functionality, this is strictly a front-end display issue. We’ll post an update once the fix has been deployed. Thanks for your patience while we get this sorted.
Reasons why anyone should get married
Page 3 - Seeking answers? Join the AnandTech community: where nearly half-a-million members share solutions and discuss the latest tech.
darkxshade
Lifer
Mosh should add a poll: "If it were up to you and your SO would be perfectly ok with your decision, would you want a marriage?"
meltdown75
Lifer
probably *shrug*
i've just been talking to friends and family. i'm @ work right now. i have a lot of friends here but they're all busy and i don't like bothering them about my problems.
i need an unbiased person to speak with, a counselor maybe.
my opinion on marriage is basically that if the two people know what they are getting into, that's fine. unfortunately my wife had no clue. she might have planned the whole wedding and reception and a million other details but emotionally she was fucking clueless as to what she was signing up for. clueless little girl with big dreams, marrying a project husband that she direly and desperately wanted to change from day one.
DisgruntledVirus
Lifer
And how many of those contracts are broken?
As noble as this is, people change. Things change. Unfortunately that is the case. Marriage is meant to say "okay I understand people change, but I want to be with you to change with you. As great as that is, there are many times people change and not for the better.
So, I have to get married to make that commitment?
I don't know about anybody else, but I'm going to make sure I'm financially stable without anybody else to ensure my future.
Looking at the divorce rate, does marriage give stability to the relationship? In so far as the different guy/girl every night/week/month/few months, then yes. In so far as "forever", no it doesn't ensure that. This applies to family stability as well.
Marriage is not required for that. See above answer as well.
That's a great, noble idea and premise. Unfortunately, they can be destroyed.
Yeah, they will never walk out on you or leave you. Right.
Lets ask all the divorced people how well that worked out....
meltdown75
Lifer
Did you read the rest of my post, you fucking twit? Are you really going to try to debate with me the reasons that I thought marriage was a good idea? Now I'm living and feeling that all those reasons were wrong. But you want to debate me and school me even more? I'm hoping it's just because you're on the internet that you are doing this.
I got fucking walked out on you prick. Marriage can lick my fucking balls. Don't try to debate with me all this bullshit when I'm going through this and have actual real-life experience that makes me despise marriage. Asshole. Read SonnyDaze's post, he won the thread. You can PM me if you wish to continue this discussion, I'm sure I'll get a vacation anyway for personal attacks so that's what I'll be limited to. Check your head you fucking douchebag. frick
PricklyPete
Lifer
I couldn't be happier being married. My wife is a godsend. Being able to spend your life with someone you really care about is very special.
I got married because:
1. I love my wife more than anything else besides my two daughters.
2. We wanted to formalize our committment to one another.
3. We wanted to have structure for our then future-children.
4. We want to be together forever.
Does this mean it can't end? No. Does it mean that it will always be this way? I hope so, but I'm not naive. Does this mean we don't have periods where we're unsure, and contemplate other avenues? No, but we have been able to work through whatever issues we've had so far, and I'm hopeful for the future.
I didn't want to have kids without being married, and I really wanted to have children, as did my wife. Now that I have two of the most beautiful girls on the planet to go along wtih the deal, I can't imagine anything else.
It is hard to see friends who are going through painful divorces, friends who I know had some of the same ideas about marriage that I do. I don't think that the actual marriage contract would make a huge differenct in terms of the hurt ... if they were in a long-term committed relationship without the piece of paper it would be just as hard.
1. I love my wife more than anything else besides my two daughters.
2. We wanted to formalize our committment to one another.
3. We wanted to have structure for our then future-children.
4. We want to be together forever.
Does this mean it can't end? No. Does it mean that it will always be this way? I hope so, but I'm not naive. Does this mean we don't have periods where we're unsure, and contemplate other avenues? No, but we have been able to work through whatever issues we've had so far, and I'm hopeful for the future.
I didn't want to have kids without being married, and I really wanted to have children, as did my wife. Now that I have two of the most beautiful girls on the planet to go along wtih the deal, I can't imagine anything else.
It is hard to see friends who are going through painful divorces, friends who I know had some of the same ideas about marriage that I do. I don't think that the actual marriage contract would make a huge differenct in terms of the hurt ... if they were in a long-term committed relationship without the piece of paper it would be just as hard.
DisgruntledVirus
Lifer
My current gf has said that to me.
When in reality it's simply, "If there are no benefits for me, but there is the huge risk to me of losing 1/2 my stuff and income and risking my future why should I get married?" I have yet to hear a single reason that will mitigate that risk for me. It's not that I *expect* to get divorced. I will only marry once in my lifetime (if at all), and if that doesn't work then that's it for me and marriage. Being a logical human being, I look at it through the eyes of a 3rd party going, "knowing what the current divorce rate is (about 1/3 of first time marriages get divorced from what I have seen/read), knowing what I stand to lose, and knowing that people change what are the benefits for me?" I don't see any personally right now.
DisgruntledVirus
Lifer
If you don't know what the common-law marriage laws are in your state, and that happens to you then it's your own fault.
In my state (Ohio), there is no common law marriage currently. I don't believe common law marriage should be a law. Also, I believe Mosh is asking about marriages where the decision to get married is made and it's not due to common law.
DisgruntledVirus
Lifer
Sorry if I came across as "attacking you" or something. I just was debating those points you made. I saw she walked out on you, and I'm sorry if I came accross as trying to "school you" on this because I wasn't.
I have heard all those reasons from many other people, and I was commenting on those reasons not trying to say "meltdown75 you're an idiot" or something like that. Your situation is exactly why I don't see a point to marriage.
JTsyo
Lifer
You guys missed, if the girl has a real crappy name. Marriage gives a good excuse to change it.
Also, it's a cultural event in most societies. It must have worked well since most of the current ones have some sort of marriage tradition. Now though it seems things have changed enough that people are not finding it as an useful institution. In the far past, marriage wasn't just between the two people but also a way to link two clans/tribes/families. Also it provided a stable environment to raise a family, now I don't think that's the first priority for all people. That might just be nature's way to keep us in check since we're so heavily overpopulated, though it doesn't make sense that the countries that do well has less growth than the poor ones.
Also, it's a cultural event in most societies. It must have worked well since most of the current ones have some sort of marriage tradition. Now though it seems things have changed enough that people are not finding it as an useful institution. In the far past, marriage wasn't just between the two people but also a way to link two clans/tribes/families. Also it provided a stable environment to raise a family, now I don't think that's the first priority for all people. That might just be nature's way to keep us in check since we're so heavily overpopulated, though it doesn't make sense that the countries that do well has less growth than the poor ones.
DisgruntledVirus
Lifer
Is saying "I'll be with you forever" the same level of commitment as signing a legal document?[/quote]
So by signing a legal document it shows "I'll be with you forever", but just saying it does not?
JeffreyLebowski
Lifer
All those points are only 50% accurate since the divorce rate is about 50%.
Marraige is pointless endevour. People want to get married to "prove their love" If you have to prove your love, there is something wrong going on that is making you prove it.
My GF of 7 years knows my stance on marraige and was told very early that if she brought the subject up it would be the one and only time.
Marraige is like a tornado. It starts off with a lot of sucking and blowing but in the end you'll loose your house.
DisgruntledVirus
Lifer
Many married couples have more than 2 children (i.e. to replace the parents when they die # wise). Hell, we even get reality TV shows about them (Jon and Kate+8).
TRENDING THREADS
-
Discussion Zen 5 Speculation (EPYC Turin and Strix Point/Granite Ridge - Ryzen 9000)- Started by DisEnchantment
- Replies: 25K
-
Discussion Intel Meteor, Arrow, Lunar & Panther Lakes + WCL Discussion Threads
- Started by Tigerick
- Replies: 25K
-
-
-
