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Random One Liners

G

Grasshopper27

Banned
Happiness can't buy money.

Hard work never killed anyone, but why chance it?

I have a grip on reality, just not this particular one.

I may not be right, but I'm NEVER wrong.

I used to be a schizophrenic, now I'm lonely.
 
Nobody goes there anymore, it's too crowded.

Oh, no, not another learning experience!

Personally, I don't believe in atheists.

So easy to use a child can do it. Child sold separately.

The computer revolution is over. They won.
 
Originally posted by: GoodToGo
What good is thousand mile journey if you begin the wrong direction?
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LOL! 🙂

Don't talk unless you can improve on the silence.

Everybody wants to go to heaven, but nobody wants to die.

Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional!!
 
Shin - Device for finding furniture in the dark.

Smile. It makes the world wonder what you're up to.

Software upgrade installed: press your luck to continue

Speed doesn't kill. Stopping very fast kills.
 
Originally posted by: Jittles
Why'd you post 4 separate times and not just once?
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to up his postcount. How else do you think he is getting 2000+ posts in a little over 2 months?
 
It's your God, they're your rules, you go to Hell!

If you can't solve a problem with force, you're just not using enough.

What you learn in college: Biology is Chemistry, Chemistry is Physics, Physics is Math, Math is Engineering. Engineering is never having to say, "would you like fries with that?"

Go to Heaven for the weather, Hell for the company.

Any time "everyone knows" such and such, then it isn't true, by a thousand to one.

Windows is the riced out Civic of the OS market. It may seem cool, it may sound powerful, it may look fast, but underneath it's still a cheap, slow, bottom of the line car. Choosing between Unix and Windows is like a car salesman telling you that you can either have the BMW for free, or pay for the riced out Civic.
 
Originally posted by: Rainsford


Windows is the riced out Civic of the OS market. It may seem cool, it may sound powerful, it may look fast, but underneath it's still a cheap, slow, bottom of the line car. Choosing between Unix and Windows is like a car salesman telling you that you can either have the BMW for free, or pay for the riced out Civic.
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not a one liner... /\


Try enjoying yourself. Everyone else has
When in doubt, fvck it. When not in doubt... get in doubt!
Sincerity is the key. If you can fake that, you've got it made
"Just say no" prevents teenage pregnancy the way 'Have a nice day' cures chronic depression
Sex is like air; it's not important unless you aren't getting any
If you drink don't park, accidents cause people.
 
Originally posted by: TheOmegaCode
I used to be a schizophrenic, now I'm lonely.
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that doesn't even make sense...

When my brother and I played Cowboys and Indians, I was always the Chinese railroad worker.
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It makes perfect sense. A schizophrenic thinks they have 2 personalities, so they can kinda talk to each other (the personalities). When your no longer a schizophrenic, you only have 1 mind so you don't have the other one to talk to.

I dream of living in the real world.
 
I'm not perverted....just creative. 😛

Behind your back is your front.

If I don't see you in the future, I'll see you in the pasture.
 
Hard Work Often Pays Off After Time, but Laziness Always Pays Off Now

There Are No Stupid Questions, But There Are A Lot Of Inquisitive Idiots

It Could Be that the Purpose of Your Life Is Only to Serve as a Warning to Others

When You Earnestly Believe You Can Compensate For A Lack Of Skill By Doubling Your Efforts, There's No End To What You Can't Do

 
Originally posted by: Nemesis77
Hard Work Often Pays Off After Time, but Laziness Always Pays Off Now

There Are No Stupid Questions, But There Are A Lot Of Inquisitive Idiots

It Could Be that the Purpose of Your Life Is Only to Serve as a Warning to Others

When You Earnestly Believe You Can Compensate For A Lack Of Skill By Doubling Your Efforts, There's No End To What You Can't Do
Click to expand...

Nice quotes from the demotivational posters. 😀
 
Originally posted by: Scarpozzi
Originally posted by: Nemesis77
Hard Work Often Pays Off After Time, but Laziness Always Pays Off Now

There Are No Stupid Questions, But There Are A Lot Of Inquisitive Idiots

It Could Be that the Purpose of Your Life Is Only to Serve as a Warning to Others

When You Earnestly Believe You Can Compensate For A Lack Of Skill By Doubling Your Efforts, There's No End To What You Can't Do
Click to expand...

Nice quotes from the demotivational posters. 😀
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my favorite: Every dark cloud has a silver lining, but lightening kills hundreds of people each year who are trying to find it

🙂

 
Originally posted by: Lonyo
Originally posted by: TheOmegaCode
I used to be a schizophrenic, now I'm lonely.
Click to expand...
that doesn't even make sense...

When my brother and I played Cowboys and Indians, I was always the Chinese railroad worker.
Click to expand...

It makes perfect sense. A schizophrenic thinks they have 2 personalities, so they can kinda talk to each other (the personalities). When your no longer a schizophrenic, you only have 1 mind so you don't have the other one to talk to.

I dream of living in the real world.
Click to expand...
No, it makes no sense, schizophrenics do not have multiple personalities. Maybe you're referring to dissociative personality disorder...
 
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