PSA: Don't put rocks inside your private parts

[WelshBloke]

Gynecologists felt obliged to tell women not to put rocks in their vaginas,

Seriously though don't do it.

Its bad for you.

You can end up breaking a toe!

 

[Printer Bandit]

 

[IronWing]

Petrified wood is the perfect gift for Valentine's Day!

 

[John Connor]

HAHAHA

 

[Carson Dyle]

Besides... there's a device and an app for that. Somehow I'm reminded of those carnival games where you ring the bell with a giant sledge hammer.

 

[IronWing]

Between this story and Operation Jade Helm, I just came up with a great idea for a hat.

 

[Sho'Nuff]

He's feeling jaded.

She got sick of being taken for granite.

 

[Fardringle]

I feel that for as long as this thread is allowed to continue, there will be no shortage of rock puns from your end.

I thought the discussion was about rocks IN your end..

 

[NesuD]

I feel that for as long as this thread is allowed to continue, there will be no shortage of rock puns from your end.

Dosh garnet! you just had to go there!

 

[renz20003]

"Is that a rock in your vagina or are you just happy to see me?"

 

[IronWing]

Sometimes tuff love is just what is needed.

 

[IronWing]

Which is better, mite or tite?

 

[IronWing]

Yeah, the article points out that those rocks can't be cleaned easily. Definitely go with golf balls instead. Wait, aren't gerbils self-cleaning?

You should always start with a clean slate.

 

[IronWing]

Gwyneth Paltrow is a nut job and anyone who follows her ''health" tips has rocks in their head.

Sounds like she metagneiss partner.

 

[allisolm]

Sounds like she metagneiss partner.

?

 

[Meghan54]

Uhhh, no, not urban legend. Have seen it...when the poor bloke came to my ER with a vague complaint of abdominal pain.

Still don't know what's worse, tho.....gerbil or curtain rod that gets stuck on a hemorrhoid. Honestly, that was sorta funny watching that gent get wheeled to the OR with this odd tent in the sheet that covered him, right over his butt.

Urban legend. No documented case of this actually exists.

However, a documented case of someone sticking a live eel up an ass does exist. And no, an eel in the ass is not okay.

http://shanghaiist.com/2010/05/01/man_in_sichuan_dies_after_friends_i.php

A man has died after an eel that was inserted into his rectum gnawed away at his bowels, causing agonising injuries which were eventually fatal.

 

[SKORPI0]

https://shop.goop.com/shop/products/jade-egg

Yoni eggs, once the strictly guarded secret of Chinese concubines and royalty in antiquity, harness the power of energy work, crystal healing, and a Kegel-like physical practice. Jade eggs’ power to cleanse and clear make them ideal for detox, too. “This particular jade, nephrite jade, has incredible clearing, cleansing powers,” says Shiva Rose; “It’s a dark, deep green and heavy—it’s a great stone for taking away negativity—and it’s definitely the one to start with.” (Read the whole story—plus a Q&A with Shiva Rose herself—here.) Fans say regular use increases chi, orgasms, vaginal muscle tone, hormonal balance, and feminine energy in general. Shiva Rose has been practicing with them for about seven years, and raves about the results; we tried them, too, and were so convinced we put them into the goop shop.

I think these are better, they've been around for a while. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ben_Wa_balls

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H8cKH9VBe2Q (V*gina weightlifting).

 

[Eug]

Uhhh, no, not urban legend. Have seen it...when the poor bloke came to my ER with a vague complaint of abdominal pain.

Still don't know what's worse, tho.....gerbil or curtain rod that gets stuck on a hemorrhoid. Honestly, that was sorta funny watching that gent get wheeled to the OR with this odd tent in the sheet that covered him, right over his butt.

Did you publish it? Because if not, you should. It would be a valid case report.

 

[IronWing]

At least we know how opal got its name.

 

[zinfamous]

?

she met-a[g]-neiss partner

 

[WelshBloke]

Uhhh, no, not urban legend. Have seen it...when the poor bloke came to my ER with a vague complaint of abdominal pain.

Indeed. We were being polite in the description!

 

[GagHalfrunt]

As a corollary to that simple rule, it should also be made clear that you need to refrain from putting your private parts inside rocks. No matter how enticing a geode may look, it won't end well.

 

[sdifox]

Maybe she was talking about granite dildo?

 

[Eug]

Indeed. We were being polite in the description!

There are lots of reports of that sort of stuff. I have never seen an official report of gerbling though. Feel free to link one.

 

[bob4432]

As a corollary to that simple rule, it should also be made clear that you need to refrain from putting your private parts inside rocks. No matter how enticing a geode may look, it won't end well.

That just paints a nasty bloody woody pic...