Printer problem at the office just turned into a major predicament...

[Crusty]

Originally posted by: AreaCode707
I bet OT will pony up $100 for you if you grab something heavy and run screaming at the printer and start repeatedly bludgeoning it. Bonus if you find the missing paper in the smashing process.

[edit] Double bonus if you scream without any 'h' in your scream.

Shortest scream ever?

 

[Arcadio]

UPDATE:

This is turning out to be the weirdest day at my job ever. The tech support guy couldn't see where the paper was going since the printer refused to print when an access panel was open, so the guy found the switch that fools the printer into thinking that the access panels are closed. When a paper clip is inserted into the switch, the printer works even with the access panels open. It took a while to figure all this out, but now it was time to see exactly where the paper was going.

Everyone was pretty anxious to see the sheet of paper being fed, going through the rollers, and somehow getting lost inside. There were literally a dozen people staring into the open panel. When my good friend Johan sent a print job to the printer, everyone stood still waiting for the key moment, but when the blank sheet of paper started its journey through the printer, somehow every single one of us missed the moment when the paper disappeared... Everyone stood speechless. After a few seconds of silence, everyone's response was a variation of "I missed it, send the print job again." Even though we were staring at the mechanism that feeds the paper, we somehow missed it. After this occurred, a few more people left the office. I don't know where they went. Johan tried to sent a test page again, but still, nobody could tell where the paper was going...

 

[Crusty]

I have a feeling this is quickly going to turn into yet another Arcadio troll thread. YAATT FTL

 

[wwswimming]

Originally posted by: ArcadioI really didn't want to get involved, but I did tell a couple of my close co-workers that according to quantum physics, there is a non-zero probability that the paper is disappearing from the office and reappearing somewhere else in the Universe, but that the chances of that occurring are extremely small, especially when it's not just one sheet of paper, but dozens... They acknowleged my comment but didn't say anything.

in one of my thermosciences classes, one of the professors told us that it was theoretically possible for an ice cube to form in a pond on a hot summer day. something related to the laws of entropy. but also, a very low probability.

i thought you were going to say you fixed it right when the boss was watching.

 

[So]

Originally posted by: Arcadio
They acknowleged my comment but didn't say anything.

I suspect most of your coworkers interactions with you are primarily concerned with not making eye contact and thinking of an excuse to get away.

 

[JTsyo]

Why not just tie a string to the paper and see how far in the string goes?

 

[Steve]

We need video, stat.

 

[fulltilt39]

Originally posted by: Arcadio
UPDATE:

This is turning out to be the weirdest day at my job ever. The tech support guy couldn't see where the paper was going since the printer refused to print when an access panel was open, so the guy found the switch that fools the printer into thinking that the access panels are closed. When a paper clip is inserted into the switch, the printer works even with the access panels open. It took a while to figure all this out, but now it was time to see exactly where the paper was going.

Everyone was pretty anxious to see the sheet of paper being fed, going through the rollers, and somehow getting lost inside. There were literally a dozen people staring into the open panel. When my good friend Johan sent a print job to the printer, everyone stood still waiting for the key moment, but when the blank sheet of paper started its journey through the printer, somehow every single one of us missed the moment when the paper disappeared... Everyone stood speechless. After a few seconds of silence, everyone's response was a variation of "I missed it, send the print job again." Even though we were staring at the mechanism that feeds the paper, we somehow missed it. After this occurred, a few more people left the office. I don't know where they went. Johan tried to sent a test page again, but still, nobody could tell where the paper was going...

PLEASE tell me what company you work for.

I want to be sure to make a note never to do business with a place that employs such a flock of idiots.

 

[Arcadio]

Originally posted by: JTsyo
Why not just tie a string to the paper and see how far in the string goes?

Excellent.. I'll suggest the idea... Reps.


brb.

 

[AreaCode707]

Originally posted by: Arcadio
UPDATE:

This is turning out to be the weirdest day at my job ever. The tech support guy couldn't see where the paper was going since the printer refused to print when an access panel was open, so the guy found the switch that fools the printer into thinking that the access panels are closed. When a paper clip is inserted into the switch, the printer works even with the access panels open. It took a while to figure all this out, but now it was time to see exactly where the paper was going.

Everyone was pretty anxious to see the sheet of paper being fed, going through the rollers, and somehow getting lost inside. There were literally a dozen people staring into the open panel. When my good friend Johan sent a print job to the printer, everyone stood still waiting for the key moment, but when the blank sheet of paper started its journey through the printer, somehow every single one of us missed the moment when the paper disappeared... Everyone stood speechless. After a few seconds of silence, everyone's response was a variation of "I missed it, send the print job again." Even though we were staring at the mechanism that feeds the paper, we somehow missed it. After this occurred, a few more people left the office. I don't know where they went. Johan tried to sent a test page again, but still, nobody could tell where the paper was going...

We need video.

 

[Newbian]

Originally posted by: Arcadio

Originally posted by: JTsyo
Why not just tie a string to the paper and see how far in the string goes?

Excellent.. I'll suggest the idea... Reps.


brb.

Make sure you attach the string to your finger and tie it really tight so it won't fall off.

 

[Insomniator]

So 12 people and 2 tech guys have been trying to fix a printer with a paper jam all day?

Is this a government job by chance?

 

[Miramonti]

Sounds like people at the office are aroused by a printer that swallows paper instead of spitting it out.

 

[GodlessAstronomer]

Ya'll Negroes posting in a troll thread.

 

[Arcadio]

Originally posted by: Insomniator
So 12 people and 2 tech guys have been trying to fix a printer with a paper jam all day?

Is this a government job by chance?

There is no "paper jam." The paper supposedly comes out the output tray, but it doesn't. We've printed more than 50 pages since the problem started and they all vanished. They're not inside the printer. Any average office worker would've discovered a bunch of crumpled paper inside a printer without much effort.

 

[AreaCode707]

Originally posted by: Arcadio

Originally posted by: Insomniator
So 12 people and 2 tech guys have been trying to fix a printer with a paper jam all day?

Is this a government job by chance?

There is no "paper jam." The paper supposedly comes out the output tray, but it doesn't. We've printed more than 50 pages since the problem started and they all vanished. They're not inside the printer. Any average office worker would've discovered a bunch of crumpled paper inside a printer without much effort.

Who wants to bet they're under / at the bottom of the printer?

 

[venkman]

Originally posted by: AreaCode707

Originally posted by: Arcadio

Originally posted by: Insomniator
So 12 people and 2 tech guys have been trying to fix a printer with a paper jam all day?

Is this a government job by chance?

There is no "paper jam." The paper supposedly comes out the output tray, but it doesn't. We've printed more than 50 pages since the problem started and they all vanished. They're not inside the printer. Any average office worker would've discovered a bunch of crumpled paper inside a printer without much effort.

Who wants to bet they're under / at the bottom of the printer?

my guess is parallel universe and Arcadio is the nexus. Some dude in another dimension is wonder where the hell all of his retarded, troll forum posts vanished too.

 

[PottedMeat]

Anyone else hoping that this ends in some sort of industrial accident like a degloving?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Degloving

 

[HardcoreRobot]

yes, clearly the only explanation is that the paper is vanishing

 

[Newbian]

Just because it's a fun thread to post in GodlessAstronomer it's no need to start posting racist remarks.

 

[So]

Originally posted by: Arcadio

Originally posted by: Insomniator
So 12 people and 2 tech guys have been trying to fix a printer with a paper jam all day?

Is this a government job by chance?

There is no "paper jam." The paper supposedly comes out the output tray, but it doesn't. We've printed more than 50 pages since the problem started and they all vanished. They're not inside the printer. Any average office worker would've discovered a bunch of crumpled paper inside a printer without much effort.

Signs point to the whole lot of you being comfortably below the average...

 

[bobross419]

Your tech support blows. Bitchass needs to rip into and get production going again... time is money and your lame ass help desk monkey needs to grow some balls.

 

[venkman]

Originally posted by: So

Originally posted by: Arcadio

Originally posted by: Insomniator
So 12 people and 2 tech guys have been trying to fix a printer with a paper jam all day?

Is this a government job by chance?

There is no "paper jam." The paper supposedly comes out the output tray, but it doesn't. We've printed more than 50 pages since the problem started and they all vanished. They're not inside the printer. Any average office worker would've discovered a bunch of crumpled paper inside a printer without much effort.

Signs point to the whole lot of you being comfortably below the average...

someone has to populate the left side of the bell curve.

 

[meltdown75]

i'd just send my print jobs to another printer....

b/c i'd know that all the lifeless dweebs would be crowded around the Arcadio printer.

whenever i think my life is boring, i'm going to come back to this thread.

thanks Arc. reps

 

[bobross419]

I've got a feeling that Arcadio actually exists in a parallel universe where Sitcom situations actually happen....