Poll: Waiting to kiss until you are married!

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chambersc

Diamond Member
Feb 11, 2005
6,247
0
0
Originally posted by: DaShen
Originally posted by: chambersc
Originally posted by: LongCoolMother
:roll: for a community who criticizes christians for being intolerant, you guys sure are tolerant!

I'll admit that I have no tolerance towards christians' beliefs.

It really depends on what you view as "christian" beliefs though. I will agree some "Christians" and their "un-Christian" beliefs really piss me off too.

Just look at my sig. :)

I define Christian beliefs as anything in the Bible. Since it all came directly from "God" and must be obeyed unquestionably, anyone who believes it is who I don't have tolerance for.
 

DaShen

Lifer
Dec 1, 2000
10,710
1
0
Originally posted by: chambersc
Originally posted by: DaShen
Originally posted by: chambersc
Originally posted by: LongCoolMother
:roll: for a community who criticizes christians for being intolerant, you guys sure are tolerant!

I'll admit that I have no tolerance towards christians' beliefs.

It really depends on what you view as "christian" beliefs though. I will agree some "Christians" and their "un-Christian" beliefs really piss me off too.

Just look at my sig. :)

I define Christian beliefs as anything in the Bible. Since it all came directly from "God" and must be obeyed unquestionably, anyone who believes it is who I don't have tolerance for.

;) that is a very ignorant thing to believe. :( Have you actually ever read through the actual teachings of the Bible?

There was a time when I spent time reading through what other people's beliefs were about. BOM, Koran (English translation <sorry if I offended any Muslims, but I can't read Arabic> ), Bhuddist teachings, Bagavat Gita (Hindu), Taoism, Marxism, Nietzsche, Plato... I didn't read through the whole thing for many of them, but I made sure I understood the core/principle beliefs before making any judgements of my own, and I have found that most, not all, religions at their core have pretty similar philosophies on life. I will say that I have found the core beliefs of Christianity to be extremely good comparatively to the rest, but I will say that fundamentally the other religions are good at teaching good behavior (standards/laws to live by).

Oh well, to each his own. I will say, you should at least figure out what Christianity is all about before you really knock it.
 

Kadarin

Lifer
Nov 23, 2001
44,296
16
81
Originally posted by: chambersc
Originally posted by: DaShen
Originally posted by: chambersc
Originally posted by: LongCoolMother
:roll: for a community who criticizes christians for being intolerant, you guys sure are tolerant!

I'll admit that I have no tolerance towards christians' beliefs.

It really depends on what you view as "christian" beliefs though. I will agree some "Christians" and their "un-Christian" beliefs really piss me off too.

Just look at my sig. :)

I define Christian beliefs as anything in the Bible. Since it all came directly from "God" and must be obeyed unquestionably, anyone who believes it is who I don't have tolerance for.

According to this site, that makes you a heretic. Bible worship != Christianity.

<a target=_blank class=ftalternatingbarlinklarge href="http://72.14.253.104/search?q=cache<img src=---i/expressions/face-icon-small-blush.gif--- border=---0--->1h47rNXoZwJ:www.newreformation.org/heresy3.htm+bible+worship+her
sy&hl=en&gl=us&ct=clnk&cd=1&client=firefox-a">Google cache</a>, since site appears to be down.
 

FDF12389

Diamond Member
Sep 8, 2005
5,234
7
76
My older brother and his fiance are waiting till they are married to kiss, I dont have a problem with that, but its not for me, Ive already been kissed countless times and I dont feel any guilt. To each his own.
 

JulesMaximus

No Lifer
Jul 3, 2003
74,599
1,001
126
Originally posted by: reverend boltron
Originally posted by: JulesMaximus
Originally posted by: LongCoolMother
:roll: for a community who criticizes christians for being intolerant, you guys sure are tolerant!

Yeah, some jackass calling me an idiot for living with my wife before marriage. That's religious tolerance at it's finest. :thumbsup:

On a side note, did you know that the probability is statistically higher for people who lived together prior to marriage to get divorced? They think the reasoning behind it is because once you have lived together, the marriage isn't really that much of a change, so the divorce seems trivial.

Another side note, the divorce rate for Christians is higher than for athiests. :confused:

Yes, I am aware of that. I am also aware that in order to make a marriage work you have to put effort into it.

Also, I don't care what the statistics say, it's a completely moot point anyway...what am I going to do? Regret it? Feel guilty about it? Worry about it? BWAHAHAHA!!! Not bloody likely!!!

If I worried at all about statistics I probably would never leave my house.
 

Doboji

Diamond Member
May 18, 2001
7,912
0
76
Originally posted by: HotChic
I know some folks that did, and they're perfectly happy going on their seventh year of marriage. Whatever works for you.

I find it really funny that there's a large societal push not to pass judgment on extreme promiscuity, but it's fine to pass judgment on extreme monogamy. Not that anyone in this thread has been judgmental so far, but it's only a matter of time.

Thats just ridiculous... someone who waits until they are married to KISS is just stupid.
 

FDF12389

Diamond Member
Sep 8, 2005
5,234
7
76
Originally posted by: Doboji
Originally posted by: HotChic
I know some folks that did, and they're perfectly happy going on their seventh year of marriage. Whatever works for you.

I find it really funny that there's a large societal push not to pass judgment on extreme promiscuity, but it's fine to pass judgment on extreme monogamy. Not that anyone in this thread has been judgmental so far, but it's only a matter of time.

Thats just ridiculous... someone who waits until they are married to KISS is just stupid.

People who drive these are just plain stupid. Its a matter of opinion.

 

Bill Brasky

Diamond Member
May 18, 2006
4,324
1
0
I read the first page of posts from that link, then I got dizzy and wanted to vomit. Its a conglomeration of all the holier-than-thou's in the world.
 

yhelothar

Lifer
Dec 11, 2002
18,409
39
91
Originally posted by: LolaWiz
That seems pretty... wow. If that is what they want.
Sorry if i am sounding close minded but thats how i feel.

Nah, being closed minded to closed mindedness is anything but closed minded.
;)
 

2deuce2

Junior Member
Sep 28, 2006
16
0
0
I'm still laughing. I just love the little badges and stuff they get for their avatar, how come we dont get little badges here?

R
 

2deuce2

Junior Member
Sep 28, 2006
16
0
0
Just an update: still laughing, but you all can continue to wax philosophical on your views about sin, sex, and religion. I'll just keep laughing...

R
 

newParadigm

Diamond Member
Jul 30, 2003
3,667
1
0
Originally posted by: 91TTZ
Originally posted by: HotChic
I know some folks that did, and they're perfectly happy going on their seventh year of marriage. Whatever works for you.

I find it really funny that there's a large societal push not to pass judgment on extreme promiscuity, but it's fine to pass judgment on extreme monogamy. Not that anyone in this thread has been judgmental so far, but it's only a matter of time.


I pass judgement on extreme promiscuity. They're scumbags, who have an extremely high chance of catching STDs.

For those not committed to God and to follow his commands, I see nothing wrong with them taking all they can get in this world. From my perspective, if you're not going to attain salvation in God's kingdom in the next life, why waste this one? (I plan on being there, so Ima wait till I seal the deal, or at least till we're engaged).
 

newParadigm

Diamond Member
Jul 30, 2003
3,667
1
0

newParadigm

Diamond Member
Jul 30, 2003
3,667
1
0
Originally posted by: clamum
Originally posted by: postmortemIA
Darn they are quick in banning. I managed to make only 8 posts.

All atheists! Go and make chaos there!

lol

I am a devout christian, and endevour to believe the absolute truth of the bible, and even I am pretty much disgusted by the forum, and find it almost comical.

Originally posted by: Fraggable
I am a very firm believer in no sex before marriage but kissing - I see no problem with that.

I tend to believe that the level of intimacy should be appropriate for the level of commitment. Personally I would not kiss someone before I was engaged.

But I know plenty of Christians who believe that kissing before marriage is the only way to go. I respect their beliefs and understand their reasoning (what redgtxdi said) but that's just not the way I interpret God's laws on relationships.

I sort of agree with you. Though I don't think one should need to be engaged, or even shure that this one is the 'one' before kissing. I think this is why the bases were invented...

 

newParadigm

Diamond Member
Jul 30, 2003
3,667
1
0
Originally posted by: reverend boltron
Originally posted by: DaShen
Originally posted by: timosyy
Originally posted by: reverend boltron
I'm a hardcore Christian too, and I voted yes. I'm also surprised that there are so many that voted yes. Though I wonder how many of the people just did it to be silly.

I can tell you, from the perspective of someone who was definitely not "raised in the church" and spent a lot of time in the world, that waiting to kiss until your married is not normal for the average Christian couple. I voted yes, because of my personal convictions, because I'm pretty darn sure it doesn't say that you can't kiss in the bible.

The reason I made that decision is because I didn't even want to open up that door. I had been down that road too many times before I was a Christian, and even a few times after I claimed to be a Christian too. Having sex and all that stuff, holding the image of being something that I wasn't, thus fulfilling the hypocritical stereotype. I had been burned by sex too many times, and it really just made me feel empty and convicted. I didn't want to carry that around anymore. So I wisened up and stopped doing what was making me feel empty, which was sinning, manifest in the form of having sex. But I still would put myself in those situations and end up kissing girls and doing a lot of the things except I wouldn't have sex.. but it was basically the same. So I realized that I couldn't trust myself in those situations. I didn't want to put myself in that position. Ephesians 4:27 says, "and do not give the devil an opportunity." For me, specifically for me, that was the opportunity. For someone else, it might not be the opportunity, and they could be completely fine in that situation. That's totally cool. I don't throw my convictions on other people, and I don't judge other people for doing what I don't, or not doing what I do. That isn't my place. There is only one Judge.

:thumbsup:

Remember, that the law is dead though. Once you make it absolutely a "sin" to kiss before marriage (which it isn't IMO), it become legalistic in its ways. There is a better way to look at behaviors than that. I would rather see good behaviors as things that are better for me and for others (more edifying if you will). I just believe that it may be better for a long term commited relationship possilby to not kiss before marriage (but I am not making it an absolute rule). If it is edifying to do, I will. :)

I never said it was a sin to kiss before marriage. I said that it was my own personal conviction and that it is something that I am doing because I don't want to open that door again. Jesus said that if you look lustfully toward a woman you are an adulterer, and if you hate your brother then you are a murderer. You should read what I wrote next time before you begin to say that I am being legalistic.

Galations chapter 2 says that the law is supposed to be a tutor to us. The fact that Christians are under a new covenant, with grace from God and the blood of Jesus covering our sins doesn't mean that we can go out and sin like crazy because grace abounds, it means, we learn the law, and begin to understand it and what it means. That way we won't continue to live by mans traditions and forsake God's commandments.

Jesus says that if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off. If your right eye causes you to stumble, pluck it out. If you like to speed and you drive a fast car, get rid of it. If you struggle with sex, then don't put yourself in that situation.

I understand where you are coming from when you say not to make it a rule and fall under the legalism of things, because once that happens, you are missing the point, no longer dependent on God, but upon yourself. The bible says to be holy as He is holy. If kissing is going to be a "gateway" for me to wander away from God, then I will do whatever it is that I have to do to stop that. I understand the forgiveness, and mercy and grace that we have through the blood, but at the same time, I know from experience that it never pays to stray (that isn't saying that I won't go and hang out with non-Christians, or that I won't talk to peopel who don't know God. Or that I will only hang out with myself, because that's missing the point too. It is saying that if I know that something causes me to struggle, I will cut it off).

Below is the section from Galations, and its actually in chapter 3.

Ga 3:24 Wherefore the law was our schoolmaster to bring us unto Christ, that we might be justified by faith.
Ga 3:25 But after that faith is come, we are no longer under a schoolmaster.

The law was a tutor, UNTIL christ came, but is no longer our code of living.
 

newParadigm

Diamond Member
Jul 30, 2003
3,667
1
0
Originally posted by: DaShen
I would rather not have this digress into a pissing match on who knows more scripture, but I would like to share this.

Matthew 22:36-38 "Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?" Jesus replied: " 'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.' This is the first and greatest commandment.

If you look at 1 John 1-2, it say that no one who claims to know G-d, yet does not follow his commandments, does not actually know G-d. I paraphrase because I would rather not throw scriptures at people. 1 John 4, tells us how we are to accomplish this. Loving each other.

If you read Romans again, the law is dead (meaning we are not tied to the law anymore). Should we go on sinning? By no means. But how does Sanctification come into play?

You read the Sermon on the Mount (BTW Ghandi thought that this was the most riveting philosophy on life he had ever read, too bad "Christians" mucked it up for him), as well as Jesus talking to the Pharisees (who made up "laws" specifically for the same reasons you stated above), you find that the "heart" or intent of the person is just as important, but also that we cannot follow the "law" (i.e. - we fail). That is why we depend on Grace, and then submitting our will to G-d, then being filled with the Holy Spirit (very metaphysical and hokey, I understand, that is why I was trying to stay away from stating this on a public forum). In this way, we are not tied to the "law", but rather tied to our relationship with G-d. I don't need to follow the "law" to consider my actions and how they will show love to others. Yes, we shouldn't sin, and sin is directly tied to law, but we can't accomplish this by making more restrictions on ourselves (that is what the Pharisees did). We accomplish this by relying on Grace and pursuing a relationship with G-d (do this and it is righteousness by faith <i.e. - G-d provides the power to not sin, not by your own doing "being lead..."> ). In this way we are Sanctified, but we still know that it is not by our own doing that we have a "righteousness by faith". Because of this, no self pride comes, because we know it is all from G-d.

I could go on and on, quote Geisler, G.K. Chesterton, C.S. Lewis, Yancey, St. Thomas Aquinas.... even scripture, but this is just an idea of what the "meat" theology IMO, that Paul was takling about. In Phil. 4, he even says he isn't there yet, because it is a process that G-d works in him to sanctify him. That he takes no pride in his accomplishments, but considers them "rubbish" (equivalent to a 4 letter word in today's standands). Anyways, I digress, there is too much that I could say, but it would be pointless. Especially on ATOT. ;) :p Any more talk of this stuff, at least on my side would end up in a pissing match about who knew more, and I don't want that.

For us, living after Christ, his commands define what is right and wrong for those of us who aspire to live faithful to God. Christ worked on the sabbath, if the law defines sin, than it wouldn't have been possible for him to be the perfect sacrafice based on your logic.
 

DaShen

Lifer
Dec 1, 2000
10,710
1
0
Originally posted by: newParadigm
For us, living after Christ, his commands define what is right and wrong for those of us who aspire to live faithful to God. Christ worked on the sabbath, if the law defines sin, than it wouldn't have been possible for him to be the perfect sacrafice based on your logic.

Jesus healed on the Sabbath. This was a "law" established by the Saducees and Pharisees at the time, not a Levitical law. I forgot the exact number of added rules that the Pharisees did, because it has been over 4 years since I really read anything on this. If you get a chance, read Norman Geisler (famous modern theologian). The Levitical law requires that you do not work on the day of the Sabbath, meaning plow the field... Was what Jesus did "work"?

If you get a chance, read through Romans 3-8, and let me know what you think. :) BTW, I included some passges, WARNING: so this post is long and somewhat verbose. Don't read it if you don't want to. No proselytizing here.

Romans 3:27-28 - Where, then, is boasting? It is excluded. On what principle? On that of observing the law? No, but on that of faith. For we maintain that a man is justified by faith apart from observing the law.

Romans 5:20 - The law was added so that the trespass might increase. But where sin increased, grace increased all the more...

Romans 6:1-2 - What shall we say, then? Shall we go on sinning so that grace may increase? By no means! We died to sin; how can we live in it any longer?

Romans 6:13-14 - Do not offer the parts of your body to sin, as instruments of wickedness, but rather offer yourselves to God, as those who have been brought from death to life; and offer the parts of your body to him as instruments of righteousness. For sin shall not be your master, because you are not under law, but under grace.

**If we submit our lives to God, he is our Master and sin will not reign in us, but sin is dead. But if we live under the law, the law is what will guide our righteousness (but ultimately we will fail), that is why it is righteousness through faith because otherwise we fail (Romans 2, 3:23)**

Romans 7:7-25
What shall we say, then? Is the law sin? Certainly not! Indeed I would not have known what sin was except through the law. For I would not have known what coveting really was if the law had not said, "Do not covet." But sin, seizing the opportunity afforded by the commandment, produced in me every kind of covetous desire. For apart from law, sin is dead. Once I was alive apart from law; but when the commandment came, sin sprang to life and I died. I found that the very commandment that was intended to bring life actually brought death.

For sin, seizing the opportunity afforded by the commandment, deceived me, and through the commandment put me to death. So then, the law is holy, and the commandment is holy, righteous and good. Did that which is good, then, become death to me? By no means! But in order that sin might be recognized as sin, it produced death in me through what was good, so that through the commandment sin might become utterly sinful.

We know that the law is spiritual; but I am unspiritual, sold as a slave to sin. I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do. And if I do what I do not want to do, I agree that the law is good. As it is, it is no longer I myself who do it, but it is sin living in me. I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature. For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out. For what I do is not the good I want to do; no, the evil I do not want to do?this I keep on doing. Now if I do what I do not want to do, it is no longer I who do it, but it is sin living in me that does it.

So I find this law at work: When I want to do good, evil is right there with me. For in my inner being I delight in God's law; but I see another law at work in the members of my body, waging war against the law of my mind and making me a prisoner of the law of sin at work within my members. What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body of death? Thanks be to God?through Jesus Christ our Lord!
So then, I myself in my mind am a slave to God's law, but in the sinful nature a slave to the law of sin.

**The law is not sin. The law is holy, but it is what defines what sin is.**

Romans 8:1-4
Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit of life set me free from the law of sin and death. For what the law was powerless to do in that it was weakened by the sinful nature, God did by sending his own Son in the likeness of sinful man to be a sin offering. And so he condemned sin in sinful man,in order that the righteous requirements of the law might be fully met in us, who do not live according to the sinful nature but according to the Spirit.

**Because the law and sin doesn't govern us then, how do we live a life without sin? By living according the the Holy Spirit and pursuing a relationship with G-d**
 

SolMiester

Diamond Member
Dec 19, 2004
5,330
17
76
So if you believe in GOD, but kiss or have sex before marrigae, he's gonna kick you out of heaven because you are a sinner, even though you accept and love Jesus Christ as your saviour.

Thats a tough parent!
 

TravisT

Golden Member
Sep 6, 2002
1,427
0
0
I'm a Christian, wish I would have waited to have sex until marriage. But I can only imagine how weird it is (or at least was for me) to not only have sex for the first time, but kiss for the first time.
 

DaShen

Lifer
Dec 1, 2000
10,710
1
0
Originally posted by: SolMiester
So if you believe in GOD, but kiss or have sex before marrigae, he's gonna kick you out of heaven because you are a sinner, even though you accept and love Jesus Christ as your saviour.

Thats a tough parent!

Where did this come from?