New scam, 300 dollar magic wands.

[Jeff7]

I'm not in favor of the death penalty, but if even one granny falls for this scam, the owners of that site should be rounded up and shot.

edit: okay, that was a bit of hyperbole.

But, any advertising that makes claims during the ad such as: " They have powerful healing qualities" but then puts in the weasel statement at the end: " Amega Global products are not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease and no inference should be made in that regard about any of the information contained herein."
BULLSHIT. You made such a claim in the advertisement. You said the product had powerful healing qualities. Please, legislators, fix this so that these bullshit marketers are fined.

Why hyperbole? Shouldn't their magic wand and Shieldite be able to protect them?

https://iyashisource.com/ShiedliteCareAndGroundingGuideV1.0.pdf

Holy crap. Check out the instruction manual.
Pretty elaborate steps for grounding.

They sell a special grounding plug if you can't get anything better than 2 millivolts according to the fluke multimeter.

I love how the black probe isn't visible in any of the images.

SONofaBITCH!! Every time I use my cell phone protector, my call gets dropped!

It'd be nice if it did work though, mainly for the dumb shits in public places on their cellphones, who never heard of the concepts of basic courtesy, or controlling the volume of their voice.
I now know more about this idiot's sister than I really care to.

 

[gorcorps]

Forrest Gump was right.

Right about what? Having an illegitimate kid with a disgusting drug ridden skank?

 

[alzan]

I was hoping it wasn't a scam; now I'll just have to replace the wand I lost in battle with He Who Must Not Be Named the old-fashioned way.

 

[Agent11]

I liked the mail order time machine from Napoleon Dynamite much better.

 

[pmv]

Shocking that anyone can buy one of these things without any background checks.
How long before someone goes on a rampage, turning dozens of innocent people into frogs?

 

[OlafSicky]

Come on how can a scam like this operate. I don't like gov but someone should step in. This is quite clearly a scam that millions of people will fall for.

 

[gorcorps]

Come on how can a scam like this operate. I don't like gov but someone should step in. This is quite clearly a scam that millions of people will fall for.

It would be quite the double standard for the government to stop somebody ELSE from taking money from the less informed

 

[Red Squirrel]

lmao these things are hilarious.

At that price it better max out my mana regen.

 

[Hugo Drax]

The buyers of these things probably get some kind of Psychological effect. Similar to the Story of Dumbo and the "Magic feather"

hey if it makes them feel more confident or lowers their neurotic behavior through the power of persuasion, then it might not be so bad.

 

[bradley]

Can't tell if it's a scam without knowing the contents of the device.

 

[HeXen]

This reminds me of the time travel device they used to sell for $300. There are also crystal balls you can buy and all sorts of things like that.
BTW what is zero-point energy?

Press and rotate at least 3 times on all finger and toe tips to unblock energy blockages

bah, you have to unblock it first, screw that.

 

[Jeff7]

The buyers of these things probably get some kind of Psychological effect. Similar to the Story of Dumbo and the "Magic feather"

hey if it makes them feel more confident or lowers their neurotic behavior through the power of persuasion, then it might not be so bad.

That sort of person is also the kind of who would listen to the voices in his head that are telling him to start chopping off people's heads so that he can vanquish some alien ghosts back to their realm.

This reminds me of the time travel device they used to sell for $300. There are also crystal balls you can buy and all sorts of things like that.
BTW what is zero-point energy?

bah, you have to unblock it first, screw that.

Something that was useful in Stargate SG-1 and Atlantis, in their Zero Point Modules: A universe in a bottle, used as a really really good battery.
For something closer to reality, start here.

Scammers also like to throw around terms like "zero point energy" and "quantum mechanics" because they're sciencey-sounding, and they use the letters q and z.

 

[videogames101]

i was thinking of a different magic wand

 

[JoLLyRoGer]

..the AMWand naturally harmonize and energize our gross and subtle bodies

...but it's not for the timid.

 

[Gunbuster]

"Energize body fluids"

 

[GagHalfrunt]

"Energize body fluids"

I can no longer sit back and allow Communist infiltration, Communist indoctrination, Communist subversion, and the international Communist conspiracy to sap and impurify all of our precious bodily fluids.

 

[Squisher]

So, where do I have to put the wand to maintain full body contact?

 

[WilliamM2]

Can't tell if it's a scam without knowing the contents of the device.

I can.

 

[Jeff7]

..the AMWand naturally harmonize and energize our gross and subtle bodies

...but it's not for the timid.

:biggrin:

 

[The Boston Dangler]

I'm not in favor of the death penalty, but if even one granny falls for this scam, the owners of that site should be rounded up and shot.

edit: okay, that was a bit of hyperbole.

But, any advertising that makes claims during the ad such as: " They have powerful healing qualities" but then puts in the weasel statement at the end: " Amega Global products are not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease and no inference should be made in that regard about any of the information contained herein."
BULLSHIT. You made such a claim in the advertisement. You said the product had powerful healing qualities. Please, legislators, fix this so that these bullshit marketers are fined.

hey hey hey, get your government out of my business. let the market decide, deregulation, close several branches of government, etc etc.

 

[The Boston Dangler]

I can no longer sit back and allow Communist infiltration, Communist indoctrination, Communist subversion, and the international Communist conspiracy to sap and impurify all of our precious bodily fluids.

i do not avoid women, mandrake. but i do deny them my essence.

 

[Ancalagon44]

Right about what? Having an illegitimate kid with a disgusting drug ridden skank?

I always think she actually died of AIDS she contracted while sleeping around, and probably infected poor Forrest.

Anyway, on topic - I hate people like this. This is a scam, pure and simple. The creators do not believe this thing actually works.

 

[Kadarin]

The only magic wand worth a damn:

 

[WelshBloke]

I'm not in favor of the death penalty, but if even one granny falls for this scam, the owners of that site should be rounded up and shot.

edit: okay, that was a bit of hyperbole.

But, any advertising that makes claims during the ad such as: " They have powerful healing qualities" but then puts in the weasel statement at the end: " Amega Global products are not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease and no inference should be made in that regard about any of the information contained herein."
BULLSHIT. You made such a claim in the advertisement. You said the product had powerful healing qualities. Please, legislators, fix this so that these bullshit marketers are fined.

Given that they claim that it protects against toxins in your food I say that we mix up a botulism milkshake, let them stir it with their wand then make them chug it down.

 

[mikeymikec]

maybe nsfw

Spoiler

this magic wand seems to work
:sneaky:

That's what I thought of when clicking on the thread title

"Energize body fluids"

I'm reminded of that scene from Mallrats regarding the effects of Superman's enhanced Kryptonian sperm on Lois