Need help with Essay

[thecritic]

Got my in-class essay score back from the teacher. This was for an English 11 AP (Language and Composition) class. AP exam is coming up on May 1st.

I was given 40 mins to write the essay, but took about 20-25 min.

Here's the essay:

1
2

Rubric(s):
3
4
5

Again, the essay is graded on a scale of 1-9. I'm curious as to your thoughts on this essay, and what grade you'll give it if you were the reader. (I'll release the grade I received later) I'm looking for suggestions on improvement as well, as the exam is coming up.

Thanks.

 

[OdiN]

This is for AP? I'd give it a C maybe.

 

[thecritic]

Yeah

 

[everman]

My honest opinion, it's not very good. Look at your last paragraph, it starts with "In other words,[...]". Lots of other problems with composition as well.
The best thing you can do is practice, that's the only way to learn how to write well.

 

[amol]

Didn't look at the rubrics, but I'd give it a 5.

I'm taking that test too, my English teacher hasn't prepared us though -__-

 

[thecritic]

Thanks for the honest opinions. I too felt it needed a lot of improvement especially in terms of defending/challenging the prompt.

Though it was a favor of my teacher to give me an 8 on the essay, he did me a definite disfavor in terms of giving an honest opinion.

 

[Kadarin]

You can really answer your own question effectively by reading the link you provided here: link

 

[thecritic]

bump?

 

[shoRunner]

F--

 

[KillerCharlie]

I hated doing those things. We practiced like 1 per week the entire year. I usually did extremely well in class and the teacher gave me a lot of 5s (she didn't give them to very many people).

Then came the AP test.... ugh. I bombed it and got like 3s on them. It sucks writing those things during a test. Those were my least favorite (and lowest scoring) aspect of all AP courses. Good luck 🙂

Thankfully though there were 2-3 other ways to get out of the introductory English class in college.