Need help with Essay

thecritic

Senior member
Sep 5, 2004
470
0
0
Got my in-class essay score back from the teacher. This was for an English 11 AP (Language and Composition) class. AP exam is coming up on May 1st.

I was given 40 mins to write the essay, but took about 20-25 min.

Here's the essay:

1
2

Rubric(s):
3
4
5

Again, the essay is graded on a scale of 1-9. I'm curious as to your thoughts on this essay, and what grade you'll give it if you were the reader. (I'll release the grade I received later) I'm looking for suggestions on improvement as well, as the exam is coming up.

Thanks.
 

everman

Lifer
Nov 5, 2002
11,288
1
0
My honest opinion, it's not very good. Look at your last paragraph, it starts with "In other words,[...]". Lots of other problems with composition as well.
The best thing you can do is practice, that's the only way to learn how to write well.
 

amol

Lifer
Jul 8, 2001
11,679
1
0
Didn't look at the rubrics, but I'd give it a 5.

I'm taking that test too, my English teacher hasn't prepared us though -__-
 

thecritic

Senior member
Sep 5, 2004
470
0
0
Thanks for the honest opinions. I too felt it needed a lot of improvement especially in terms of defending/challenging the prompt.

Though it was a favor of my teacher to give me an 8 on the essay, he did me a definite disfavor in terms of giving an honest opinion.
 

Kadarin

Lifer
Nov 23, 2001
44,296
16
81
You can really answer your own question effectively by reading the link you provided here: link
 

KillerCharlie

Diamond Member
Aug 21, 2005
3,691
68
91
I hated doing those things. We practiced like 1 per week the entire year. I usually did extremely well in class and the teacher gave me a lot of 5s (she didn't give them to very many people).

Then came the AP test.... ugh. I bombed it and got like 3s on them. It sucks writing those things during a test. Those were my least favorite (and lowest scoring) aspect of all AP courses. Good luck :)

Thankfully though there were 2-3 other ways to get out of the introductory English class in college.