Need Advice

Bolvangar

Golden Member
May 20, 2001
1,347
0
71
This will probably be a lot to read....... you've been warned.

Some background info - in college right now, got out of a 3 year relationship a little over 6 months ago. First love, broke my heart, all that stuff, you know the story.

About 2 months ago I started hanging out with a new group of friends, everyone's pretty cool and all that. To make a long story short I started to like one of the girls in our group, problem is her boyfriend is also in our "group" of friends. We all usually hang out 2-3 nights a week and have a good time. This girl is really the first girl I've been the least bit interested in since my breakup with ex girlfriend. Her boyfriend is a pretty cool guy, no problems with him or anything.

Here's my dilema - Whenever I hang out with the group, I tend to feel like an ass and uncomfortable. I really like this girl a lot, and her boyfriend is a pretty cool guy. But if I got the chance I'd go after his girl in a second. They act very strange around eachother, they act more like brother and sister than gf/bf. I've never really seen anykind of affection between the two of them, and I've maybe seen them touch eachother twice in the past 2 months. I've got a few suttle hints over the past 2 months that she may be interested in me, nothing big though. Oh and they've been going out for about 1 and a 1/2 years.

So, do I go for it and tell her how I feel and risk not being able to hang out with everyone (even though I allready feel really uncomfortable when I'm around them)
Or, do I not say anything at all and always have the question in the back of my head about what if I had said something? Would something have happened between us?

I'm sure some of you will think I'm an ass for even thinking of saying anything to her considering she's allready in a relationship, but I've had it done to me and I really dont feel like being "the nice guy" anymore. If she says no, no harm done, if she says yes then it wasn't meant to be with her current relationship.


 

Don't tell her how you feel. It'll ruin the group dynamic you've got going and it'll make things harder for everyone. Just act normally around the girl and don't let on that you've got feelings for her. IF (and this is a big IF) they break up, then go for it. But until then, just be a friend.
 

sixone

Lifer
May 3, 2004
25,030
5
61
Originally posted by: jumpr
Don't tell her how you feel. It'll ruin the group dynamic you've got going and it'll make things harder for everyone. Just act normally around the girl and don't let on that you've got feelings for her. IF (and this is a big IF) they break up, then go for it. But until then, just be a friend.


Agreed. If it's meant to be, it'll wait.

 

sniperruff

Lifer
Apr 17, 2002
11,644
2
0
you are free to think about it, but i certainly won't do it. i know it'll be hard but try and move on. you guys can always remain friends.