Need advice regarding parentals... would like advice from some older adults in the house...

[Ornery]

"Its completly practical, and Ive got it all planned out so that it will work (gotta save up some gas money though). But the only problem is my parents standing in the way. So the question is, do I do it against their will? Should I just get up and go during the night like I said I was going to? Ive never disobeyd my parents about something of this magnitude, but I feel its something I need to do. "

A 3,000 mile trip for a dog is practical?

I'm not a pet lover, but I have a 17 year old son. Thank God he has a much better attitude than you. Or, maybe he's learned that I mean what I say, and wouldn't ask twice. Same thing I guess.

I'm curious who's stuck with the dog right now? Maybe it's already been put down or something...

 

[Cuda1447]

Originally posted by: Ornery
"Its completly practical, and Ive got it all planned out so that it will work (gotta save up some gas money though). But the only problem is my parents standing in the way. So the question is, do I do it against their will? Should I just get up and go during the night like I said I was going to? Ive never disobeyd my parents about something of this magnitude, but I feel its something I need to do. "

A 3,000 mile trip for a dog is practical?

I'm not a pet lover, but I have a 17 year old son. Thank God he has a much better attitude than you. Or, maybe he's learned that I mean what I say, and wouldn't ask twice. Same thing I guess.

I'm curious who's stuck with the dog right now? Maybe it's already been put down or something...

My grandpa has the dog. Its not put down. Im glad you think I have a bad attitutude. Considering Ive never disobeyed my parents in a major way in my life before. Pretty bold statement to make. Oh well I appreciate your point of view...


It is practical though.
I would be going home to see my friends... I would retrieve my dog, and I would have a vacation. Whats not practical about it? Besides, I'd be paying for it all myself.

 

[Ornery]

Should I just get up and go during the night like I said I was going to?

THAT, is a bad attitude. Like I said, in this house no means no. Your dad already said what he meant. What's to discuss? If you're ready to move out, go ahead...

 

[Xionide]

Originally posted by: Ornery
Should I just get up and go during the night like I said I was going to?

THAT, is a bad attitude. Like I said, in this house no means no. Your dad already said what he meant. What's to discuss? If you're ready to move out, go ahead...

There is no grey area with you is there?

-Xionide

 

[Ornery]

There is discussion, then there is a decision. Once that's done, it's over, so no.

 

[lizardboy]

Originally posted by: Ornery
"Its completly practical, and Ive got it all planned out so that it will work (gotta save up some gas money though). But the only problem is my parents standing in the way. So the question is, do I do it against their will? Should I just get up and go during the night like I said I was going to? Ive never disobeyd my parents about something of this magnitude, but I feel its something I need to do. "

A 3,000 mile trip for a dog is practical?

I'm not a pet lover, but I have a 17 year old son. Thank God he has a much better attitude than you. Or, maybe he's learned that I mean what I say, and wouldn't ask twice. Same thing I guess.

I'm curious who's stuck with the dog right now? Maybe it's already been put down or something...

Prepare for your son to rebel against a hard-ass like yourself, when he gets away at college he's going to do everything he couldn't do with you being so overprotective. No one to blame but yourself.

 

[Xionide]

Originally posted by: Ornery
There is discussion, then there is a decision. Once that's done, it's over, so no.

Yes but it seems like you didnt even look at the situation your like "dad says no so its no" before you even thought about the whole situation. Your like a god damn lemming. If your dad told you to jump off a cliff would you?

-Xionide

 

[Kadarin]

It's all about the cost/benefit ratio. Work that out, decide whether it's worth it to you, then make the decision and do what you have to. That's what being an adult is all about.

 

[rgwalt]

Well, you are an adult, so consider that when making your decision. You don't want to let your parents OWN you, but on the other hand you do live with them, so you should respect their wishes. Maybe they don't want the dog anymore... In any case, as long as you live with them, they have the right to throw you out of the house.

If I were you, I would continue to try and formulate a diplomatic solution to the problem. GL!

Ryan

 

[olds]

45 year old dad here.
You live in your parents home, you live by their rules. If you don't like it, move out. That is what I would tell my 18 year old or older child. But I believe I make reasonable rules appropriate for the situation.
But I'd let my daughter make the trip. But I know her history. For some reason your parents don't trust you to make the trip. Have you had traffic accidents or tickets? Do they approve of your girlfriend and or of the two of you staying in a hotel?
Have them post their side of the issue here. We are only getting one.

 

[Jokeram]

I would not do it.. considering you are 18 and you probably do not have too much experience driving in bad conditions.

The weather can change rapidly and when you have been driving long you tend to get complacent.. you do not fail to realize you are tired. This is even with experienced drivers. I put on about 30-40000 miles a year when I was 19-20 but even with that experience there were times when I would catch myself pushing myself beyond my limits.

Given the time of the year, I would not suggest it at all. If you get caught in a lake effect snow dump, and go/spin off the road.. good luck to you.

If you really want to drive up then wait till the summer and do it then, you will atleast be able to enjoy the countryside on your way up.

Gas + Motels/Hotels + Food, you might as well as fly up to MI and back... don't know too much about shipping animals but it can't be exhorbidant.. so if you saved up you could maybe fly up now and then have the dog sent later.

If your dad was going to get the dog shipped anyway, why don't talk to frieght people get the costs and all that and give your dad the details. Do the leg work, give him options and he can choose the carrier and pay for it

 

[sandorski]

So, the dog is just wandering around in Michigan?

Why don't you get whoever is looking after the dog to send the dog to you, by plane or something? This way you can get your dog, maybe save money(?), and not tick off your parental units.

 

[Cuda1447]

Ya Ive decided not to do it, weather reasons only though.


Im not so concerned with the length of the drive, Ive made that drive before when I moved down here... and I know it can be hard, but I am capable of it. The conditions can also be very rough in the winter, but Ive driven in Michigan snow for 2 years prior to this, so I am somewhat experienced.


I won't do it though because it is a risk. I was more going for a vacation and the dog, then just the dog though. (People seemed to miss that, or maybe I forgot to say it ) Thanks for everyones advice though.

 

[badmouse]

Dude, if you want the vacation, all you do now is say, Dad, you're right, that was way too much driving - so bye, I'm going someplace closer. Thank him profusely for his care and concern. Say this RIGHT BEFORE you walk out the door and don't tell him where you're going.

And then, call every day and check in.

Have fun. And get that doggie shipped to you.

(edit for spelling)

 

[jeremy806]

Well, you mentioned that you still live with your parents.

So that means that you intend to put the dog in your dad's house.

His house, up to him if the dog can be there.

If you want to be independent, move out and support yourself. After that, get as many dogs as you want.

jeremy806

 

[StageLeft]

I would not recommend that because your parents will have a fit. Needless to say you'll not have insurance paid for you in the future and it will be a big source of strife. I'd simply tell them that they better hurry up and get the dog.

 

[EagleKeeper]

Depending on where in Fla and Mich, you will be dead tired on arrival and also lose a day in just resting up. Now you are down to visiting for only 2 days before you will leave and go back.

The dog can wait for you (it does not sound like it is getting abused).
Figure $100/day for gas/food/lodging excluding any emergencies on the road.

You have not indicated what your Dad's objections are, so it is difficult to provide advise.

 

[allisolm]

I was more going for a vacation and the dog, then just the dog though.

If so, then you might want to reread the following:

allisolm said "use the money you would have spent to have the dog shipped to you."
Maetryx said "Instead of saving gas money, save for dog freight money."
sandorski said "Why don't you get whoever is looking after the dog to send the dog to you, by plane or something?"
badmouse said "And get that doggie shipped to you. "

and Jokeram said "don't know too much about shipping animals but it can't be exhorbidant.. so if you saved up you could maybe fly up now and then have the dog sent later. ... why don't talk to frieght people get the costs...and give your dad the details. Do the leg work, give him options and he can choose the carrier and pay for it."

End results - you get dog, parental units are not ticked off, you get to plan ahead to lobby more persuasively for the same trip at a later date.

 

[Mill]

Why can't you fly? If you start searching for tickets now you can find very reasonable fares. Get a friend to pick you up at the airport, enjoy a vacation, and then fly back home with the dog.

 

[FlashG]

Originally posted by: allisolm
I was more going for a vacation and the dog, then just the dog though.

If so, then you might want to reread the following:

allisolm said "use the money you would have spent to have the dog shipped to you."
Maetryx said "Instead of saving gas money, save for dog freight money."
sandorski said "Why don't you get whoever is looking after the dog to send the dog to you, by plane or something?"
badmouse said "And get that doggie shipped to you. "

and Jokeram said "don't know too much about shipping animals but it can't be exhorbidant.. so if you saved up you could maybe fly up now and then have the dog sent later. ... why don't talk to frieght people get the costs...and give your dad the details. Do the leg work, give him options and he can choose the carrier and pay for it."

End results - you get dog, parental units are not ticked off, you get to plan ahead to lobby more persuasively for the same trip at a later date.

I raised 2 boys (35 & 22) and the above is what I would suggest. Remember your dad is YOUR dad. He may not be perfect but he loves you and is looking out for you.

If you were my 18 yr old and went ahead and did your own thing, in spite of my objection, you would be in hot water. Remember your parents are still supporting you and it is your duty to support them. Believe me it's a tough road to responsibly raise kids today. Don't mess up a good family relationship over this.

BTW, is there a reason why your parents might not want the dog back? Think about it.

 

[Cuda1447]

Regardless of whether or not they want the dog, I do. If they didnt want the dog they should have told me they had no intentions of getting it when we were moving. Instead they said they would get him in a few weeks, then it was they were gonna have him shipped, then it was at Thanksgiving, then X-mas, who knows what next. They just keep delaying it. If they had no plans to get him then they should have told me.


Doesn't matter now, Im not going to go unless I have permission. Which I won't get. In the meantime Im working on getting a 3rd job and scholarships to a university so I don't have to be dependent on my parents in the least anymore. (Even if I still will be, I don't want to be forced to be.)

 

[FlashG]

Originally posted by: Cuda1447
Regardless of whether or not they want the dog, I do. If they didnt want the dog they should have told me they had no intentions of getting it when we were moving. Instead they said they would get him in a few weeks, then it was they were gonna have him shipped, then it was at Thanksgiving, then X-mas, who knows what next. They just keep delaying it. If they had no plans to get him then they should have told me.


Doesn't matter now, Im not going to go unless I have permission. Which I won't get. In the meantime Im working on getting a 3rd job and scholarships to a university so I don't have to be dependent on my parents in the least anymore. (Even if I still will be, I don't want to be forced to be.)

Good, sounds like your on the right track. Independentance is another way of saying that you are becoming an adult.

WELCOME, You are transforming from puberty to poverty.