my Yahoo Personal ads

[ultimatebob]

Originally posted by: bennylong

Originally posted by: ultimatebob
I'm calling shens on this one. No one can be this socially inept, even ATOT members

I'm not socially inept. I tell people at work that I have never been with a woman and they call me a liar because I'm very outgoing and socialable at work. I'm actually the life of every departments that I have worked in. They can't understand why I can't get a woman.

I'm just having a very hard time finding any woman that will go out on a date with me. I'm desperate!

Ok, maybe you just have really BAD judgement then. Read that profile again, and then ask yourself... Would any women that I know want to date a person like this? I doubt it, since you're practically telling women to buzz off with all the weird stuff in your profile.

 

[PingSpike]

Women hate desperation. And your ad stinks of it. Sorry, I'm being brutally honest here. So you're short and you're a virgin? Big deal. Don't let those traits define you. Write what is good about you in the ad, and leave out the stuff that isn't. You don't have to lie, but you don't want yourself excluded immediately...you want an opportunity to get your foot in the door and get a date with some women.

Adding two inches to your height was a worthwhile embellishment IMO though. Just make sure you stand up really straight when you meet them.

 

[Kyanzes]

The virgin part sucks big time. Leave it out. Also, try not to tell the woman on the first date that you are a virgin. "There's something I have to tell you right away: I'm a virgin...and I have a small dick... and sometimes my underwear gets rusty..." and stuff like that, cause that would just suck. As if you would be looking for some mentor/help/tool to get rid of your virginity. Dunno. It's in no way as romantic as it sounds at first.

 

[torpid]

It's yahoo personals, you could put up a photo of brad pitt and still would only find strange people. Try a less fringe/loserly site like match or, even better, do some speed dating. Something. Anything but yahoo personals.

 

[Scarpozzi]

Trust me, most women don't look for mates on those sites anyhow. They just post their profiles for fun. You'd have more luck trying to hookup with coworkers, at church, or even find a singles club....if you want to take a chance. Better yet, enroll in some 100 level college courses somewhere. You can probably audit them so they won't count for anything....and you'll have an excuse to be on campus...then just start hitting on every girl there and tell the college kids how much money you make. Have a ring ready and BAM you'll be set for marraige.

 

[ultimatebob]

Ya know, church might be a good idea for this guy. It's one of the few places where being a virgin over the age of 25 could be attractive to someone

 

[bennylong]

but what if I don't believe in anything? Do I tell them I can be converted? Those church people can probably see through me

 

[maximus maximus]

Originally posted by: bennylong
33 years young
[ edit intro ]
About Me
[ edit about me ]
First Name:Bang long (under review)
Gender:Man seeking a Woman
Age: 33
Location:Los Angeles, CA
Marital Status:Single - never married
Body Type:Slim
Height:5' 4"
Eyes:Brown
Hair:Black
Ethnicity:Asian
Sense of Humorry / Sarcastic
Social Setting:Comic Relief
TV Watching:News Junkie
Smokingoesn't smoke
Drinkingrinks Socially
Living Situation:Alone
Have Kids:No
Want (more) kids:Yes
Education:College Grad
Employment Status:Full-time
Occupation:Banking / Financial Services / Real Estate
Income:$50,000 to $74,999
Religion:None/Agnostic
Attend Services:Never
Political Views:Middle of the road
Astrology:Taurus
Languages:English
Interests:Watching Sports
In my own words
[ edit description ]

Damn.. you need to learn some creative wirting man. Add some humor, sarcasm etc

I am a 33 years old virgin that have never been with a woman. <-- Drop this part.. Also, never say that you are a virgin, who has never been with a woman. A virigin means that you have never been with a woman....unless you have been ass raped by some guy.

My clock is ticking and I would like to find someone to marry and start a family
Say that you are looking for some company and if it works out, you are prepared for long term commitment.
, preferable a woman. <-- WTF?

No drug addicts need apply <-- Apply? This is not a job dude.. Say respond

Edits and comments above.

You need to write about what you are looking for in a woman. From reading your profile, it appears that you are ready to bang any woman you meet. Sounds kinda ... desperate.

 

[krunchykrome]

If your name is really Bang Long, you might have a shot.

 

[daveymark]

Originally posted by: doze
Bang long

ironic name for a virgin?

 

[maximus maximus]

Originally posted by: krunchykrome
If your name is really Bang Long, you might have a shot.

ROFL..
Even better, change your name to BANG LONG HARD DEEP

 

[krunchykrome]

Originally posted by: maximus maximus

Originally posted by: krunchykrome
If your name is really Bang Long, you might have a shot.

ROFL..
Even better, change your name to BANG LONG HARD DEEP

Bang Long Lo Mein

 

[JS80]

you'll get all the horny repressed christian girls who want to pop kids right away


dude change your name...

 

[JulesMaximus]

Originally posted by: bennylong

I am a 33 years old virgin that have never been with a woman. My clock is ticking and I would like to find someone to marry and start a family, preferable a woman.

No drug addicts need apply

This is redundant. By definition a virgin is someone who has never had sex. Is there any other kind of virgin?

How does a guy live 33 years and not ever have sex with a woman??? Without being gay of course.

BTW-You sound desperate.

 

[Ranger X]

Maybe you come off as being too desperate.

 

[krunchykrome]

Originally posted by: JulesMaximus

Originally posted by: bennylong

I am a 33 years old virgin that have never been with a woman. My clock is ticking and I would like to find someone to marry and start a family, preferable a woman.

No drug addicts need apply

This is redundant. By definition a virgin is someone who has never had sex. Is there any other kind of virgin?

How does a guy live 33 years and not ever have sex with a woman??? Without being gay of course.

BTW-You sound desperate.

Desperate yes, but in a funny way.


And to the OP, you shoud watch the video "yellow fever" on google video.

 

[iwearnosox]

Originally posted by: Scarpozzi
Trust me, most women don't look for mates on those sites anyhow. They just post their profiles for fun. You'd have more luck trying to hookup with coworkers, at church, or even find a singles club....if you want to take a chance. Better yet, enroll in some 100 level college courses somewhere. You can probably audit them so they won't count for anything....and you'll have an excuse to be on campus...then just start hitting on every girl there and tell the college kids how much money you make. Have a ring ready and BAM you'll be set for marraige.

I've shagged/dated/whatever at least a couple dozen women from online sites. They're crazier than the garden variety "meet them at the supermarket type" but it's still a good place to hook up.

 

[randomlinh]

Originally posted by: iwearnosox
I've shagged/dated/whatever at least a couple dozen women from online sites. They're crazier than the garden variety "meet them at the supermarket type" but it's still a good place to hook up.

i should create a profile and see what responses i get

 

[andylawcc]

Originally posted by: Ranger X
Maybe you come off as being too desperate.

ya....


and I think you should take out the "Bang Long" and "Income" part....

 

[Fritzo]

Originally posted by: doze
Bang long

That name and he's a virgin....I think that qualifies as irony.

 

[iwearnosox]

Originally posted by: Fritzo

Originally posted by: doze
Bang long

That name and he's a virgin....I think that qualifies as irony.

Until you realize his middle name is hand.

 

[yhelothar]

Originally posted by: JulesMaximus

Originally posted by: bennylong

I am a 33 years old virgin that have never been with a woman. My clock is ticking and I would like to find someone to marry and start a family, preferable a woman.

No drug addicts need apply

This is redundant. By definition a virgin is someone who has never had sex. Is there any other kind of virgin?

How does a guy live 33 years and not ever have sex with a woman??? Without being gay of course.

BTW-You sound desperate.

Well you could have had a girlfriend without getting to homebase.

 

[bennylong]

Originally posted by: andylawcc

Originally posted by: Ranger X
Maybe you come off as being too desperate.

ya....


and I think you should take out the "Bang Long" and "Income" part....

I have no choice as they rejected my profile!

Profile Status: Your profile is Searchable [ edit searchable status ]

* Your first name was not accepted because it contains personal contact information.
* Please review our profile guidelines, and make changes below for approval.

 

[Baked]

How can you be a virgin w/ a earning like that? Bitches will flock to you like white people on black friday when they find out how much you make.

 

[PanzerIV]

Benny, another vote for leaving off the virgin status. That serves no purpose other than to drive potential candidates away who might have otherwise gotten to know you for the person you are and not your sexual experience.

I also agree your profile is a bit on the desperate side. Lighten it up, be honest but not THAT honest. Nobody wants to know everything about you before they even meet you. Have some mystery about yourself, man!