My sister is living on the streets of wilmington, delaware

[Gnurb]

edit: she's alright now, she called my mom to come pick her up, and she's going to go see a doctor.

My sister who turned 21 last month hadn't called or seen any of her friends and family for a week. She left without saying anything from my Mom's house leaving her purse and cellphone. She left with a guy who had been living with her, doing drugs with her, and went to his parents house and got arrested for disorderly conduct for rolling around on hte grass. I found out after hiring a private investigator to find her that she was using dxm, apprently that does that to you.

Anyway, after she got arrested, she asked to be dropped off at rodney square in Wilmington. Wilimington is a real ******, dangerous town. She met a new guy there and they're doing drugs, stealing things to do drugs with, and sleeping on the street. She called me from a homeless shelter after I hung up a lot of fliers all over wilmington. After I spent Saturday, Sunday and Monday trying to find her, I spent a few hours with her buying her food and clothes. She says she is in love with this guy and that her life is on track now. The guy got out of prison on june 19th for slashing some guy with a razorblade, and he's slashed his ex-girlfriend across the chest. I told her this. She refuses to come live with me in Boston, a cabin that is unaccopied owned by my grandparents, or out to california to live with my other sister.

What do i do, can I help her? I'm planning on flying bak this weekend and trying to locate her once again and talk to her with some of her old friends, urge her again to try and just make contact with me once in awhile (I gave her a local delaware number), but she hasn't.

 

[phatj]

dxm isnt that cough syrup?

not sure if there's anything you really can do (legally)...

good luck with the whole situation...

maybe take her home via brute force?

too bad she isn't 17 you could get custody or something...

sry brother

 

[Nebor]

Forced rehab if you can afford it. Drugs are a hard thing to kick. It's likely that she'll be stuck in that lifestyle until she either dies (which might not be long) or something so horrific happens that it makes her change her ways.

Like I said, rehab if you can afford it. Realize that because she's over 21, and would have to consent, you will be paying a LOT of money to have her taken and placed in a secluded rehab facility. She may also never forgive you, and might just go right back to drugs.

I feel for you buddy.

 

[MX2]

Pssshh...women. Oh wait....

Seriously though, I hope things get better for her

 

[potato28]

I think you need to get forced therpy for her, or next time(if theres a next time) she gets arrested make sure to tell the police to hold her and wait for your call or something...

 

[doze]

dxm is the active ingredient in some cough syrup and will mess you up pretty good, but if she's living on the street it's probably meth or crack also.

Ever see the movie trainspotting where the guy gets locked in a room to detox. You might have to basically kidnap her take her to a different environment and let her sweat it out for a few days before she realizes that she's screwing up her life if she continues.

 

[bennylong]

intervation

 

[ivol07]

Good luck, man. I know how hard it is to try and get a family member off of whatever substance they are abusing and get their life straight. Rehab is the best option but unless she wants to go....and stay, there really isn't anything you can do. If worse comes to worse you could try to have her locked up in a mental ward somewhere. Tell the cops that she's threatening suicide and they'll take her quick enough....at least for a few days.

Good luck, it's going to be a hard road but you're doing the right thing for someone you love. God bless.

 

[PHiuR]

coffee and cigarettes.

 

[KillyKillall]

Originally posted by: bennylong
intervation

agreed. i had to do this for my grandmother. an INTERVENTION that is.

 

[SampSon]

Wilmington didn't feel very ghetto when I visit there.

 

[her209]

Sounds like a pretty messed up situation. Good luck.

 

[aswedc]

Originally posted by: SampSon
Wilmington didn't feel very ghetto when I visit there.

Some parts are kind of shady. Police coverage can be lacking. But yeah, nothing like the bad areas of Philly...

 

[T9D]

That'd be rough. It just kills you inside to see someone you care about ruining their lives and not knowing if they will even survive. Best of luck to you.

I say you get a whole bunch of people together that care about her and have like an intervention thing.

Or maybe some day when she is passed out you can just put her in your car and take her away from there. Maybe the time she is gone she will come to her senses before she finds a way to get back.

 

[Gnurb]

Originally posted by: Nebor
Forced rehab if you can afford it. Drugs are a hard thing to kick. It's likely that she'll be stuck in that lifestyle until she either dies (which might not be long) or something so horrific happens that it makes her change her ways.

Like I said, rehab if you can afford it. Realize that because she's over 21, and would have to consent, you will be paying a LOT of money to have her taken and placed in a secluded rehab facility. She may also never forgive you, and might just go right back to drugs.

I feel for you buddy.

Do you have any more information on this? I called a mental hospital in delaware and they said the most I could do would be kidnap her, take her there, and then she would be able to sign herself out in a couple of hours.

 

[dainthomas]

:camera:?

 

[DaWhim]

don't bother. she is not asking you for help.

 

[ubercaffeinated]

If you love her, grab her, force her into rehab. Do all you can for her before she does more things that she will regret. After all that, if she still goes back to that ******, then atleast you can have the peace of mind that you did your duty as your brother. I hope for the best.

 

[tweakmm]

I do really hope that your sister gets some help.

On another note, I really hate to hi-jack a thread like this, but seriously, is it really legal to kidnap someone? Even if only for a few hours?

 

[Gnurb]

Here is a picture
pic

Another thing is that I just got a job offer at a pretty cool startup in honolulu. I can go there and work for a couple of months as a contractor, or as a full-time employee, but it would be pretty unrealistic to fly back to philadelphia to help my sister.

 

[Nebor]

Originally posted by: Gnurb

Originally posted by: Nebor
Forced rehab if you can afford it. Drugs are a hard thing to kick. It's likely that she'll be stuck in that lifestyle until she either dies (which might not be long) or something so horrific happens that it makes her change her ways.

Like I said, rehab if you can afford it. Realize that because she's over 21, and would have to consent, you will be paying a LOT of money to have her taken and placed in a secluded rehab facility. She may also never forgive you, and might just go right back to drugs.

I feel for you buddy.

Do you have any more information on this? I called a mental hospital in delaware and they said the most I could do would be kidnap her, take her there, and then she would be able to sign herself out in a couple of hours.

I'm afraid I don't have any specific information, but there are secluded facilities that will NOT allow someone to check themselves out. They are technically illegal, but overlooked by the law.

I grew up in a very wealthy area, and people's children would fall into problems with drugs, and they'd have to have them nabbed and locked up.

Realize we're talking about at least $10,000 worth of services here. If you can nab her yourself, and have a place to keep her contained, that's probably your best bet. Plus you know she's under YOUR supervision, not some shady strangers'.

 

[Nebor]

Originally posted by: Gnurb
Here is a picture
pic

Another thing is that I just got a job offer at a pretty cool startup in honolulu. I can go there and work for a couple of months as a contractor, or as a full-time employee, but it would be pretty unrealistic to fly back to philadelphia to help my sister.

That's a heartbreaking decision to have to make. It may sound callous, but how close are you to your sister?

 

[FallenHero]

Originally posted by: potato28
I think you need to get forced therpy for her, or next time(if theres a next time) she gets arrested make sure to tell the police to hold her and wait for your call or something...

legally they can't do that.

 

[Nebor]

Originally posted by: FallenHero

Originally posted by: potato28
I think you need to get forced therpy for her, or next time(if theres a next time) she gets arrested make sure to tell the police to hold her and wait for your call or something...

legally they can't do that.

That's true. But it happens every day. You think the police are going to bust an "illegal" rehab clinic? No. They're allowed to operate under the radar.

 

[WildHorse]

"what do i do?"

You H E L P her. You might be her only lifeline. We've all gotta help each other in this life.
Only you can work out what form your help can take . . . put her into a care facility as ward of the state, take her into your home, whatever, but you HELP her, don't heartlessly let her languish & die of neglect.

Even though we all know she is the one responsible, she probably is at the bottom of Maslow's heirarchy of needs, raw survifal, so probaly not someone you can just rationally discuss with. To me that implies need for specialized intervention of some kind, probably beyond what you're equiped to provide.