Law Question

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DrPizza

Administrator Elite Member Goat Whisperer
Mar 5, 2001
49,601
167
111
www.slatebrookfarm.com
Originally posted by: Fingolfin269
Have any of you guys ever been to a bar and asked a girl for a number or a date? How is this any different?

Defend yourself man. If that is sexual harassment then this country's court system freaking sucks. And so do any of the pansies who would support such a claim.

This is different because he created an intimidating situation. The situation matters.
Tell a female on the street that you'll give her $100 for sex, and it's solicitation.
Tell a female coworker, for whom you're the supervisor that you'll pay her a $100 bonus for sex, and it's sexual harassment.
 

Fingolfin269

Lifer
Feb 28, 2003
17,948
34
91
Originally posted by: DrPizza
Originally posted by: Fingolfin269
Have any of you guys ever been to a bar and asked a girl for a number or a date? How is this any different?

Defend yourself man. If that is sexual harassment then this country's court system freaking sucks. And so do any of the pansies who would support such a claim.

This is different because he created an intimidating situation. The situation matters.
Tell a female on the street that you'll give her $100 for sex, and it's solicitation.
Tell a female coworker, for whom you're the supervisor that you'll pay her a $100 bonus for sex, and it's sexual harassment.

That girl was not sexually harassed. She just wanted to get even with him for embarassing her. You guys all know it's true and yet you tell him he's at fault.

This world kind of sucks sometimes because of politically correct crap like this. We aren't talking pubes on a coke can or long dong silver! :p
 

Jzero

Lifer
Oct 10, 1999
18,834
1
0
Originally posted by: Fingolfin269
That girl was not sexually harassed. She just wanted to get even with him for embarassing her. You guys all know it's true and yet you tell him he's at fault.
The rules are the rules. You don't have to like them or agree with them, but you better know what they are and play by them or they are going to bite you in the ass.

In this day and age, you keep your trap shut if you know what's good for you.
 

Orsorum

Lifer
Dec 26, 2001
27,631
5
81
Originally posted by: Jzero
Originally posted by: Fingolfin269
That girl was not sexually harassed. She just wanted to get even with him for embarassing her. You guys all know it's true and yet you tell him he's at fault.
The rules are the rules. You don't have to like them or agree with them, but you better know what they are and play by them or they are going to bite you in the ass.

In this day and age, you keep your trap shut if you know what's good for you.

Sounds about right. I agree with DrPizza, if he created an intimidating situation that's what matters, and in the manner in which he replied to a university official, it could very well be taken as harassment. I'm still curious as to why she didn't call the PD right away, though.
 

Fingolfin269

Lifer
Feb 28, 2003
17,948
34
91
Originally posted by: Jzero
Originally posted by: Fingolfin269
That girl was not sexually harassed. She just wanted to get even with him for embarassing her. You guys all know it's true and yet you tell him he's at fault.
The rules are the rules. You don't have to like them or agree with them, but you better know what they are and play by them or they are going to bite you in the ass.

In this day and age, you keep your trap shut if you know what's good for you.

Well yah, I wouldn't have said it. But this stuff has got to stop. It's like we're afraid of having the conversation because we're branded as X if we say certain things. If I want to discuss Bill Cosby's comments I may be branded a racist just for wanting to have the conversation. If I ask a girl for her phone number, even though I obviously don't want it, I'm accused of sexual harassment? Give me a break.
 

DaiShan

Diamond Member
Jul 5, 2001
9,617
1
0
Originally posted by: laxplayer39
To anybody who knows the law I have a problem. I had a problem with an RA. She was being very rude to me when I was hanging out with my friends. She said "get out you cant be here" when we werent doing anything wrong and in fact I have people that will agree. So I made a few jokes and everyone started laughing (im like jeez shes on a powertrip, stuff like that).

now she went and filed a report with the UP (university police) and they banned me from her building stating that i sexully harrassed her!! now ive taken classes, and had training and i did NOT harrass her but since she works for the school they AUTOMATTICALLY took her side and never gave me a formal hearing. so now they sent a letter to my parents (isnt that also a breach of the law because isnt there laws saying that this is private b/w the student and school. i dont care that my parents know but i remember that there was a lawsuit a while back when some school sent a kids grades home to his parents and they said that since the child was over 18 they werent legally allowed to)

now before even hearing my side they made all these accusations. they being the office of residential life. im in cali and my school is in NY. their whole system seems flawed. instead of the us civil law which is 'innocent until proven guilty' it is 'guilty until proven innocent'. this is rediculous and i wonder should i hire a lawyer or what. i want to fight not only the charges but also i want to fight the system and the way they are handling this.

thanks

I don't know about the legal aspect of it, but I've dealt with housing a LOT. the first thing you want to do is take a statement from all of the people that were there, if everyone is on the same page but her its like hmmm who do we believe. Next you go to the University Ombudsman, he/she is there to settle disputes between the student and the school, although normally they don't interfere in housing matters like noise violations, I think this is serious enough that they will get involved. Bring the statemens and if you can witnesses with you. You will also want to send copies to the residential life coordinator for your area and the head of housing to let them know whats up. Also do you go to a public or private school? Because that matters if they can send stuff to your parents. My school is public and in Florida, they can't send MOST stuff to your parents, but they have a policy after 3 alcohol violations they can send something to your parents. You will also want to get a copy of the police report that she filed. It sucks you are in a situation like this, some RA's/hall directors are on serious power trips. there was this one RA on my building that wrote me up for surfing down the stairs on a card board box when my friend told her to her face it was him and that I wasn't even there, then she came to my room with her boyfriend and he walked in the door way and told me to show his girl some respect , which was about the best thing that could have happened to me, because 1. he is not a university official and as such should not have been there, and 2. he was in my residence without my permission, so I flipped out while my friend was taping (we normally tape all encounters with housing from past experiences it helps) I told him to get the f#$%^ out before I beat him to death, which made him mad cause it was in front of his girl and you could see him hesitate before telling me to f-off. in the end this all helped when I went to the head of housing, not only did I get dismissed from this charge, but also another charge that I had to see him about the same day. the RA was also reprimanded and had to write a letter of appology. Some RA's are real jerks, but a lot (like mine on my floor) are really cool and just want to do their job. Basically in most situations if you don't make their lives difficult they won't make your life difficult.
 

Orsorum

Lifer
Dec 26, 2001
27,631
5
81
Originally posted by: DaiShan
Originally posted by: laxplayer39
To anybody who knows the law I have a problem. I had a problem with an RA. She was being very rude to me when I was hanging out with my friends. She said "get out you cant be here" when we werent doing anything wrong and in fact I have people that will agree. So I made a few jokes and everyone started laughing (im like jeez shes on a powertrip, stuff like that).

now she went and filed a report with the UP (university police) and they banned me from her building stating that i sexully harrassed her!! now ive taken classes, and had training and i did NOT harrass her but since she works for the school they AUTOMATTICALLY took her side and never gave me a formal hearing. so now they sent a letter to my parents (isnt that also a breach of the law because isnt there laws saying that this is private b/w the student and school. i dont care that my parents know but i remember that there was a lawsuit a while back when some school sent a kids grades home to his parents and they said that since the child was over 18 they werent legally allowed to)

now before even hearing my side they made all these accusations. they being the office of residential life. im in cali and my school is in NY. their whole system seems flawed. instead of the us civil law which is 'innocent until proven guilty' it is 'guilty until proven innocent'. this is rediculous and i wonder should i hire a lawyer or what. i want to fight not only the charges but also i want to fight the system and the way they are handling this.

thanks

I don't know about the legal aspect of it, but I've dealt with housing a LOT. the first thing you want to do is take a statement from all of the people that were there, if everyone is on the same page but her its like hmmm who do we believe. Next you go to the University Ombudsman, he/she is there to settle disputes between the student and the school, although normally they don't interfere in housing matters like noise violations, I think this is serious enough that they will get involved. Bring the statemens and if you can witnesses with you. You will also want to send copies to the residential life coordinator for your area and the head of housing to let them know whats up. Also do you go to a public or private school? Because that matters if they can send stuff to your parents. My school is public and in Florida, they can't send MOST stuff to your parents, but they have a policy after 3 alcohol violations they can send something to your parents. You will also want to get a copy of the police report that she filed. It sucks you are in a situation like this, some RA's/hall directors are on serious power trips. there was this one RA on my building that wrote me up for surfing down the stairs on a card board box when my friend told her to her face it was him and that I wasn't even there, then she came to my room with her boyfriend and he walked in the door way and told me to show his girl some respect , which was about the best thing that could have happened to me, because 1. he is not a university official and as such should not have been there, and 2. he was in my residence without my permission, so I flipped out while my friend was taping (we normally tape all encounters with housing from past experiences it helps) I told him to get the f#$%^ out before I beat him to death, which made him mad cause it was in front of his girl and you could see him hesitate before telling me to f-off. in the end this all helped when I went to the head of housing, not only did I get dismissed from this charge, but also another charge that I had to see him about the same day. the RA was also reprimanded and had to write a letter of appology. Some RA's are real jerks, but a lot (like mine on my floor) are really cool and just want to do their job. Basically in most situations if you don't make their lives difficult they won't make your life difficult.

At the UW they can contact the parents, but there are stipulations as to when and how; they can't do it on minor violations. However, if it's written into the conduct code or housing contract you're SOL. Same if you go to a private school.

I would lean away from this being a genuine issue with housing ( no offense!) because most housing depts. at universities I've spoken with have been absolutely paranoid about liability - it's very easy for a person to lose their job in housing. We had a guy lose his job (assistant director or project manager or something relatively high up) this last week because of an email with some inappropriate jokes he sent to friends in the department.

It's usually not so easy for residents to get kicked out or seriously reprimanded. I am still wondering why you didn't get a meeting with an RD... I'm not questioning your motives, but is it possible you met with the RD and just forgot to put it in the post?
 

slag

Lifer
Dec 14, 2000
10,473
81
101
Originally posted by: mugs
Haha... "i want to fight not only the charges but also i want to fight the system and the way they are handling this." Quit being so melodramatic and grow up.

"b/c im just a student that im AUTOMATICALLY GUILTY!!! that is ridiculous!! ... cmon...that has to be agaisnt the law in some way"

You ARE guilty.


100% wrong here. He is guilty of being a d|ck, yes, but sexual harassment, no, definitely not.
 

Orsorum

Lifer
Dec 26, 2001
27,631
5
81
Originally posted by: slag
Originally posted by: mugs
Haha... "i want to fight not only the charges but also i want to fight the system and the way they are handling this." Quit being so melodramatic and grow up.

"b/c im just a student that im AUTOMATICALLY GUILTY!!! that is ridiculous!! ... cmon...that has to be agaisnt the law in some way"

You ARE guilty.


100% wrong here. He is guilty of being a d|ck, yes, but sexual harassment, no, definitely not.

In the context, I would say it's far more debateable. At the UW it comes down to something as simple as "creating a hostile environment", and in the situation presented it sounds like he did. His comments were inappropriate, at best, and should have gotten him sent to the Vice President for Student Affairs (or their equivalent) at worst. I'm still waiting to hear what school he goes to.
 

DaiShan

Diamond Member
Jul 5, 2001
9,617
1
0
At the UW they can contact the parents, but there are stipulations as to when and how; they can't do it on minor violations. However, if it's written into the conduct code or housing contract you're SOL. Same if you go to a private school.

I would lean away from this being a genuine issue with housing ( no offense!) because most housing depts. at universities I've spoken with have been absolutely paranoid about liability - it's very easy for a person to lose their job in housing. We had a guy lose his job (assistant director or project manager or something relatively high up) this last week because of an email with some inappropriate jokes he sent to friends in the department.

It's usually not so easy for residents to get kicked out or seriously reprimanded. I am still wondering why you didn't get a meeting with an RD... I'm not questioning your motives, but is it possible you met with the RD and just forgot to put it in the post?

Yeah I know its probably not like this at all universities, and even at UF it is almost imposible to be removed from housing unless you are selling drugs or something. The thing is though, at least at UF every time you get a reprimand or up it goes on your record, so even if you are wrong it is in your best interest to try to fight it, because even if it is only noise you don't want to have to apply to graduate school and have 10 noise violations, it doesn't look that bad, but also not that great. The other thing housing can do here is conduct probation, which is basically suspension for a term and if you don't act right next term you get kicked out, my friend got that for drinking, he lied and said he wasn't drinking, and no one could prove he was, so they let him off, then his ROOMMATE brings a video tape of the night in question the housing and screwed him over. What is an RD? Basically how it works here is an RA write you up you go to a hall director to have a meeting, he can issue you a reprimand if you accept responsibility or you can have a formal meeting with a judicial official or judiciary board if you like. The first time I went for noise I was just like this one isn't worth fighting because I had 3 other violations pending and I want to look like I took responsibility for my actions. After that any time I had a violation I just went straight to the head of housing as he was the only one that had the power to clear things up. He's a nice guy and he's not on a powertrip like some of these RA's are, in the end I was written up 16 times for 36 violations was issued that one reprimand and had that expunged at the end of the year, not too bad :D (not trying to brag or anything, I was an idiot and very lucky with all the crap I did, but trying to help the OP a little bit because I have a lot of experience with housing, albeit not at his school.) Oh btw OP read the residential life rules, it would be beneficial even if you aren't in this situation because sometimes they have some really weird ones. In order to fight for your rights you must first know your rights heh. At my school for example you could not remove the window screens from your window, and couldn't have more than 2 people in your room. So if you are having a little get together with 5 or 6 people the screen is out and they come up for noise you are now dealing with 3 violations instead of 1.
 

laxplayer39

Golden Member
Nov 11, 2000
1,523
0
0
listen then she should take me to court then if she honestly thinks that she can get me for sexual harassment. because this is not a light charge and i do not only want this not on my permanent record but i also do not want this on my school record. schools can send this out .

as far as the school i go to its a small school in ny. its part of the SUNY system. (dont really want to be too specific right now).

your right i was a jerk but that was because i felt she was on a powertrip. what irks me is that the director of housing never met with me before banning me from her building ... they sent a letter home saying i was banned from her building until 2005.

MY rhc (resident hall coordinator) told me just take this and ill reduce the ban for just the rest of this past semester. im like no because i never got heard properly and why would i say im guilty of something i didnt do

if it was indeed sexual harassment i should have been in jail with a PA or private lawyer on my side, my dad is going to call the head of res life today and i want to know what he says

this is also a little harder b/c im in CA and my school is in NY. i have an internship in NYC in a few weeks so i will look into getting a lawyer from ny then if need be...

what does the law speicifically state and how bendable is it? meaning in anyway can what i said be construed as sex. harassment??
 

Orsorum

Lifer
Dec 26, 2001
27,631
5
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Originally posted by: laxplayer39
listen then she should take me to court then if she honestly thinks that she can get me for sexual harassment. because this is not a light charge and i do not only want this not on my permanent record but i also do not want this on my school record. schools can send this out .

as far as the school i go to its a small school in ny. its part of the SUNY system. (dont really want to be too specific right now).

your right i was a jerk but that was because i felt she was on a powertrip. what irks me is that the director of housing never met with me before banning me from her building ... they sent a letter home saying i was banned from her building until 2005.

MY rhc (resident hall coordinator) told me just take this and ill reduce the ban for just the rest of this past semester. im like no because i never got heard properly and why would i say im guilty of something i didnt do

if it was indeed sexual harassment i should have been in jail with a PA or private lawyer on my side, my dad is going to call the head of res life today and i want to know what he says

this is also a little harder b/c im in CA and my school is in NY. i have an internship in NYC in a few weeks so i will look into getting a lawyer from ny then if need be...

what does the law speicifically state and how bendable is it? meaning in anyway can what i said be construed as sex. harassment??

Your school should have a policy on sexual harassment, and (most likely) you can be given sanctions by the university without any PD involvement; you do realize that sexual harassment doesn't necessarily involve jail time?

The director of housing didn't meet with you - did the hall director?
 

mugs

Lifer
Apr 29, 2003
48,920
46
91
You're mad that the school notified your parents about it, but you're willing to have your dad go to bat for you. :confused:

I really don't think this girl singled you out randomly, you apparantly gave her some reason to want you to leave. You could have left and taken it up with her supervisor, but you chose to stay and make offensive comments (of a sexual nature no less) to her. At best you're very immature.

You say "why would i say im guilty of something i didnt do," but you admit to what you said. I'm sure she told them exactly what you said, so why do you think that hearing it from your mouth will make things any different? Your motivation (her powertrip) makes no difference.
 

Orsorum

Lifer
Dec 26, 2001
27,631
5
81
Originally posted by: DaiShan
Yeah I know its probably not like this at all universities, and even at UF it is almost imposible to be removed from housing unless you are selling drugs or something. The thing is though, at least at UF every time you get a reprimand or up it goes on your record, so even if you are wrong it is in your best interest to try to fight it, because even if it is only noise you don't want to have to apply to graduate school and have 10 noise violations, it doesn't look that bad, but also not that great. The other thing housing can do here is conduct probation, which is basically suspension for a term and if you don't act right next term you get kicked out, my friend got that for drinking, he lied and said he wasn't drinking, and no one could prove he was, so they let him off, then his ROOMMATE brings a video tape of the night in question the housing and screwed him over. What is an RD? Basically how it works here is an RA write you up you go to a hall director to have a meeting, he can issue you a reprimand if you accept responsibility or you can have a formal meeting with a judicial official or judiciary board if you like. The first time I went for noise I was just like this one isn't worth fighting because I had 3 other violations pending and I want to look like I took responsibility for my actions. After that any time I had a violation I just went straight to the head of housing as he was the only one that had the power to clear things up. He's a nice guy and he's not on a powertrip like some of these RA's are, in the end I was written up 16 times for 36 violations was issued that one reprimand and had that expunged at the end of the year, not too bad :D (not trying to brag or anything, I was an idiot and very lucky with all the crap I did, but trying to help the OP a little bit because I have a lot of experience with housing, albeit not at his school.) Oh btw OP read the residential life rules, it would be beneficial even if you aren't in this situation because sometimes they have some really weird ones. In order to fight for your rights you must first know your rights heh. At my school for example you could not remove the window screens from your window, and couldn't have more than 2 people in your room. So if you are having a little get together with 5 or 6 people the screen is out and they come up for noise you are now dealing with 3 violations instead of 1.

Which record does it go on? I know at my school it doesn't go on your academic record and it won't be released with your transcript unless it's something that gets escalated to a university conduct code issue (as opposed to a housing issue). An RD is a Resident Director, like a Hall Director at other universities. And at my school there is also a judicial board, though they usually handle issues like drinking, not sexual harassment - in fact, if I recall correctly (doesn't come up too often here!), that would be something that's handled either by the vice president's office for student affairs or the PD.

It is an unfortunate fact of the RA role that a good quarter of the population is comprised of people on power trips - I wish it wasn't, but it is. I've learned to be skeptical of an account of a situation until I can hear both sides; however, I tend to take the RAs side unless there is solid evidence the RA acted inappropriately (and saying "yes, I was a jerk but she deserved it" does not win my respect, nor do I think it earns anyone else's).

And I agree, the OP needs to read his housing contract and his university policy on conduct towards a university official and sexual harassment. I've been involved in a few cases where a person's gotten into trouble for disobeying a reasonable request by a university official, that is, an RA. Keep that in mind when you're talking with an RA; although they might be on a power trip, they are a university official and can wield quite a bit of power; if they're acting inappropriately get witnesses and other evidence and make a case.

As for the separate infractions - it's your responsibility to know the terms of the housing contract you signed, and you won't get justice or sympathy by claiming you "didn't know the terms". Not saying you're that way, but I've dealt with people who've signed an apartment lease (!!) without reading the terms or even knowing their rights. It's sick.

Cheers!
Nate
 

Ness

Diamond Member
Jul 10, 2002
5,407
2
0
What school do you go to. Link us to an online copy of their rules/guidelines/whatever

Oftentimes the dorms are considered a school's private property, and they can do damn near anything they want to the residents, so long as it doesn't break the housing contract.

Also, were you issued any form of citation or just the letter and being banned from the building?

You need to figure out exactly what it is that you want... because so far it just seems like you are pissed off that you got owned.

What was the reason she confronted you in the first place? It seems like the only reason you may have to get this reversed is that she was harrassing you to begin with, and if she had a legitimate reason to be doing her job, then you just need to shut the hell up and move on.

You aren't being entirely open and honest with us, like you have something to hide. We can't help if you don't answer our questions.
 

Orsorum

Lifer
Dec 26, 2001
27,631
5
81
Originally posted by: Ness
What school do you go to. Link us to an online copy of their rules/guidelines/whatever

Oftentimes the dorms are considered a school's private property, and they can do damn near anything they want to the residents, so long as it doesn't break the housing contract.

Also, were you issued any form of citation or just the letter and being banned from the building?

You need to figure out exactly what it is that you want... because so far it just seems like you are pissed off that you got owned.

What was the reason she confronted you in the first place? It seems like the only reason you may have to get this reversed is that she was harrassing you to begin with, and if she had a legitimate reason to be doing her job, then you just need to shut the hell up and move on.

You aren't being entirely open and honest with us, like you have something to hide. We can't help if you don't answer our questions.

Sounds about right, I've asked multiple times for more details. If you actually want advice, man, you have to tell us everything!
 

Orsorum

Lifer
Dec 26, 2001
27,631
5
81
Originally posted by: Gurck
Originally posted by: Shooters
Originally posted by: laxplayer39
'can i get your number?' with a big grin on my face
'can we go out on a date'?

In this day and age, that could qualify as sexual harassment.

Unfortunate but true. Generally two types of people that are RAs, those who really need the free room and/or other benefits, and those cop types who lust for power and control over others. Those can be a real nightmare in dorms and other walks of life :( I had an RA like that my third semester, ended up putting a full garbage can (overturned) on his car's roof :evil:

Well that's mature.
 

DrPizza

Administrator Elite Member Goat Whisperer
Mar 5, 2001
49,601
167
111
www.slatebrookfarm.com
Well, you said small SUNY school, so I picked SUNY Brockport to grab their sexual harassment policy.

excerpts:

"It may include:

sexually oriented verbal kidding or abuse, including derogatory or dehumanizing gender references, such as whistling, catcalls, or sexual remarks or jokes

Such conduct has the purpose or effect of unreasonably interfering with an individual's academic or work performance creating an intimidating, hostile, or offensive College environment"

I tend to think it fits. Barely, but it fits.

p.s. You're in college and you think people go to jail for sexual harassment? Maybe the reason you don't believe you did anything wrong is because you think sexual harassment means grabbing someone's boobs or directly stating something like "give me a bj, b!tch."

All you ahve to do is create an offensive environment! And, whether it's offensive or not is up to the victim!!! Since communication isn't limited to words only, the way you said it, laughed, etc. plays a large role.

Egads... I can't think of a single SUNY school that someone would travel across the country for, yet be admitted into if they can't spell "ridiculous" correctly. Other than the school of Ceramic Engineering, I'd think anything else could be found in California, and I thought they were more competitive than that.
 

DrPizza

Administrator Elite Member Goat Whisperer
Mar 5, 2001
49,601
167
111
www.slatebrookfarm.com
Originally posted by: mugs
Originally posted by: Orsorum

Sounds about right, I've asked multiple times for more details. If you actually want advice, man, you have to tell us everything!

He goes to Alfred State College

No f'in way. Alfred State College?! WTF for? He travelled from Cali to NY to go to Alfred??!
There aren't any community colleges in California?!
 

laxplayer39

Golden Member
Nov 11, 2000
1,523
0
0
why i went there isnt even an issue...but it was to play sports. i will be going to cornell in the fall or alfred u i dont really know which yet and thats one of the main reasons i dont want this on my record.

ok they faxed me everythign that she alleged against me ... she said i made comments but never specificed as to what the ocmments were except that i asked for her number which i said i did... but that isnt sexual harassment

basically now it goes down to her word against mine but the fact that she works for the school makes them more likely to believe her as oppsoed to me...but i a buddy who gave me a name of a real good lawyer...i now need to write a letter why she is wrong but they already put it ON my record and now i have to FIGHT to get it off...thats like putting someone in jail before having a hearing ...

i had no hearing or anything and thye put it on my record..thats the main reason why im upset...
 

DaiShan

Diamond Member
Jul 5, 2001
9,617
1
0
Which record does it go on? I know at my school it doesn't go on your academic record and it won't be released with your transcript unless it's something that gets escalated to a university conduct code issue (as opposed to a housing issue). An RD is a Resident Director, like a Hall Director at other universities. And at my school there is also a judicial board, though they usually handle issues like drinking, not sexual harassment - in fact, if I recall correctly (doesn't come up too often here!), that would be something that's handled either by the vice president's office for student affairs or the PD.

It is an unfortunate fact of the RA role that a good quarter of the population is comprised of people on power trips - I wish it wasn't, but it is. I've learned to be skeptical of an account of a situation until I can hear both sides; however, I tend to take the RAs side unless there is solid evidence the RA acted inappropriately (and saying "yes, I was a jerk but she deserved it" does not win my respect, nor do I think it earns anyone else's).

And I agree, the OP needs to read his housing contract and his university policy on conduct towards a university official and sexual harassment. I've been involved in a few cases where a person's gotten into trouble for disobeying a reasonable request by a university official, that is, an RA. Keep that in mind when you're talking with an RA; although they might be on a power trip, they are a university official and can wield quite a bit of power; if they're acting inappropriately get witnesses and other evidence and make a case.

As for the separate infractions - it's your responsibility to know the terms of the housing contract you signed, and you won't get justice or sympathy by claiming you "didn't know the terms". Not saying you're that way, but I've dealt with people who've signed an apartment lease (!!) without reading the terms or even knowing their rights. It's sick.

Cheers!
Nate

it goes on your transcript here for 6 years (reduced from 9 by the state legislature) And yes, its the same here about obeying a university official its called non-compliance and is a separate offense, its often tacked on to cases here by RA's if you make them mad, and a HD will usually uphold it, but the head of housing doesnt' stand for that crap. For instance I was issued a non-compliance for not allowing them to search my room. It was the same female RA that wrote me up for "surfing down the stairs" and there was no way I was letting her rifle through my things after she was already reprimanded for inappropriate behavior. Basically OP, I know you wanted to look hard in front of your friends, but you have to realize its better to just comply and not have to deal with this BS then to start a fight. Now if you really didn't say anything sexual in nature then follow the advice I and others have given you.
 

DrPizza

Administrator Elite Member Goat Whisperer
Mar 5, 2001
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Originally posted by: mugs
Originally posted by: laxplayer39
why i went there isnt even an issue...but it was to play sports.

I wonder why that was my first guess.

You're kidding me! I live 45 minutes away from Alfred State.
I went to school at Alfred University! (across the street)

I didn't even know they HAD sports teams!!!
I thought the games they played against the local community college (graduating class of around 200) were just intramurals.
 

laxplayer39

Golden Member
Nov 11, 2000
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yah we played your alfred u lax team and they beat us by 1...

we were 12-3 and the team that got the at large bid to the toruney was a team that we lost to by 1 goal