Lame pickup lines!!! Share yours!

[Keego]

I got these off TheSpark, Tell me yours!

"You must have horrible, painful blisters on your heels. Because you've been running through my dreams all night. In uncomfortable shoes."

"I must've died, changed religions, and spent 127 years in purgatory because I see an angel standing in front of me."

"You're so fine, I bet you'd slip through a colander."

"If I had to choose between being with you for one night and winning the lottery?I'd take the lottery. But it'd be close. Real close."

"You remind me of my fear of snakes."

"Once I knew two people who didn't fall in love. They both died horribly the following day. Makes you think."

 

[illusion88]

"Its not gonna suck itself"
"IF your X squared, I wanna be one third X cubed, the area under your curves"

hahahaha lol

 

[white]

nice shoes, let's fvck.

i may not be the best looking guy here, but i'm the only one talking to you.

do you work for ups? cause i thought i saw you checking out my package.

 

[N8Magic]

REPOST.

 

[Keego]

Originally posted by: N8Magic
REPOST.

2 days old!

 

[N8Magic]

Originally posted by: Keego

Originally posted by: N8Magic
REPOST.

2 days old!

Has it been that long?

 

[BeauJangles]

you: Did it hurt?
her: what?
you: when you fell from heaven?


Nice shoes, let's f%ck


Let's do some math. add the bed, subtract the clothes, divide the legs and multiply

 

[m2kewl]

Originally posted by: BlinderBomber
Let's do some math. add the bed, subtract the clothes, divide the legs and multiply

oh man! that's good! that's my sig for sure!

"how's my twins?"
"those two are weighting you down...here, let me help hold them up"

 

[anxi80]

guy: hi, you wanna dance?

girl: hah, no.

guy: i think you heard me wrong. i said you looked fat in those pants.

 

[anxi80]

*buMp* lets beat the other thread...

guy: want to come over to my place and have some pizza and f%$@ ?

girl: gross, no!

guy: what? you dont like pizza?

 

[her209]

Seriously, do you guys ever try these on women... you should, they work!

 

[ElFenix]

Originally posted by: anxi80
guy: hi, you wanna dance?

girl: hah, no.

guy: i think you heard me wrong. i said you looked fat in those pants.

hahahah

 

[anxi80]

Originally posted by: her209
Seriously, do you guys ever try these on women... you should, they work!

actually, im more of a "My McLaren is in the shop, so im driving this heap in the mean time..." guy myself...

 

[zsouthboy]

Hey baby lets play Army.. I'll lie down and you blow me away.

 

[lilFajita]

if your right leg was thanksgiving and your left leg was Christmas, I'd like to visit you between the holidays.

that shirt is very becoming on you. if I was on you, I'd be cumming too.

guy: got any (insert nationality here) in you?
girl: no....
guy: want some?

 

[Argo]

Your parents must be retarded, cuz baby, you're special.

 

[MainFramed]

can i call you cambells? cuz your um um good...

your so hot you made fire jealous

my love for you is like diarreah, i cannot hold it in

i know i am not fred flinstone but i'll bet i can sure make your bed rock

wanna play army? ill go lay down and you can blow me away

can i have you number? cause i lost mine

kiss me if im wrong but isint your name {not there name} LOL


you: is your dad in jail?
her: no... why would you think that?
you: cuz he must have stole the stars and put em your eyes



Enjoy

 

[OutHouse]

if you and I were two squirrles could I bust a nut in your hole?

 

[jyates]

" I think I'm in love, let me lick your leg and find out."

 

[guaraguao]

OK guys, here's mine. This sucker works, trust me:

Hello, eligible female. I happen to be a heterosexual male who is at his reproductive prime. Would you like to copulate?

This is originally from my entry for "heterosexual" in my mock dictionary.

 

[Tallgeese]

You must be jelly, cuz jam don't shake like dat!

 

[anxi80]

this thread is goin' to hell in a hand basket...

I LOVE IT!!

 

[Cyberian]

Originally posted by: here4amission
my love for you is like diarreah, i cannot hold it in

How could any girl resist that one??!!

 

[MarkW]

ok, heres one

if you were a mcdonald's sandwich, id call you mcbeautiful

 

[OutHouse]

Originally posted by: MarkW
ok, heres one

if you were a mcdonald's sandwich, id call you mcbeautiful

now that is lame!