Sigh.
Some people are fortunate enough to marry their 'soul mate' if such a thing exists, but most of us forge partnerships based on more practical things, like shared goals and values.
I have been foolish in my youth and twice 'married in haste and repented at leisure' only the difference is with the Mister, I have learned that sometimes the struggles between you are what make you better people.
There is someone in my heart who will stay there for the rest of my life, whether I want him to or not. The Mister knows about this as it is part of our history together. The love I carry for him is not wasted... it reminds me that my own flaws--- impulsiveness and impatience--- cost me what might have been with him. At the same time, I wonder if he is out there remembering me... and realizing that his indecision and inability to commit cost him dearly as well. I forgive him and I hope he's forgiven me... I sincerely hope that wherever he is, he is happy.
Above all, the shared commitment the Mister and I have to supporting each other and our children is what I value most. There was a time when the Mister and I did not have what we have now, but time has forged a stronger bond between us than I thought was possible. Really... imagine a marriage between Russ and Isla... there you have the Mister and me. (Russ, don't take offense, as I mean it most respectfully)It's not what either of us expected but yet we have created something better together than we could have separately. Even my neighbor commented on it... she said she would never have picked us out as a couple if she didn't know we were married... yet we make it work.
So, to make a long story short... love is never 'wrong'. If you go by the definition of love in Corinthians, love has the power to heal. Being irresponsible and dishonest is wrong, but love--by the definition I use-- is always a blessing.