Is it truely possible to be 'best friends' with a girl?

[giguana]

it's quite possible.

my THREE greatest friends are girls. They are the best friends I have. they make up my "female support group" whenever I have girl problems.

I, in turn, beat up whoever is giving them a hard time

Dude. you are my hero. i wish i had that kind of support.
have the support group for girl problems, and have an outlet for any pent up frustration you might have.

 

[AreaCode707]

Originally posted by: nd
My theory:

Conditions in which male and females can be GOOD platonic friends

[*]Neither attracted to one another
[*]At least one is attached in relationship
[*]The two are obviously not each other's type (they both acknowledge this)
[*]Outside factors (co-worker, relative, religion, etc.) which PREVENT romantic involvement


Otherwise, it's not practically possible.

*whew* I'm safe then.

 

[mchammer187]

i think its possible but very unlikely & i think it is even less likely that you can be best friends with a girl that u were never attracted too

i used to think i was in love with this girl, i never told her but we became good friends, i met other ppl and she has too. I consider us best friends and I do love her as a friend and find her physically attractive but not "in love" with her anymore, I have other love interests now

one of the few ppl i can just relax with or just sit and enjoy each other's company

i definitely wouldn't brush her off if she had feelings for me but i am not pursuing her and i dont think she would reject me if i did like her "that way"

so i guess this is a maybe

or yes but not likely

 

[keystroker]

f*ck that did you see the loser in the other thread that is having trouble with his best friend thats a girl?? It never works out! Friends are always there for you. I went through many many girls that were just friends but I always keep in touch with my male friends. Girls wont be there for you. I'm sure many of you have girls that are friends because you cant have them as GF's . Sorry.

 

[Nocturnal]

i'm best friends with my girlfriend.

 

[NikPreviousAcct]

My best friend's name is Chelsea. Viper GTS comes close, but I wouldn't call her a best friend.

nik

 

[CKDragon]

I have a question that is pretty well related to the topic which has potential to be long-winded, sorry...

My girlfriend and I were friends for 4 months before we became and item. We recently had our 6-month anniversary and I deeply care about her, so that's 10 months total we've been at least friends. There is no question that we are each other's best friends.

About a month ago I visited her on her campus and right as I was meeting her at the door of her dorm, this other guy comes out of no where and hugs her. The incredibly bad-timing of the incident still makes my jaw drop. I'm within ear-shot so I hear the guy ask why she's still on campus because he thought she was coming home to see me. She has seen me the entire time and then walks to me and hugs me. My girl gets very defensive pretty quickly because she knows that I've seen what went on and explains that he's a childhood friend since 2nd grade, I know they went to the same high school at least, so of course I believe her.

I trust her completely, I know her thoughts are entirely with me and that she would never cheat on me. It was natural for her to get defensive, I certainly would have too, even if it was innocent. And like I said, the guy knew about me and knew that normally she would come home to see me. What does irritate me is that on a college campus all year long this guy has been randomly initiating hugs with my girlfriend who she sees as a brother-like figure.

My question is just this, His intentions can't be entirely good, can they?

I have never hugged a girl randomly just for being a friend. Only to comfort them in bad situations, but not just run up to a friend and hug her...

The whole thing just bothers me. Thanks for those who took the time to read this.

CK

 

[mchammer187]

Originally posted by: CKDragon
I have a question that is pretty well related to the topic which has potential to be long-winded, sorry...

My girlfriend and I were friends for 4 months before we became and item. We recently had our 6-month anniversary and I deeply care about her, so that's 10 months total we've been at least friends. There is no question that we are each other's best friends.

About a month ago I visited her on her campus and right as I was meeting her at the door of her dorm, this other guy comes out of no where and hugs her. The incredibly bad-timing of the incident still makes my jaw drop. I'm within ear-shot so I hear the guy ask why she's still on campus because he thought she was coming home to see me. She has seen me the entire time and then walks to me and hugs me. My girl gets very defensive pretty quickly because she knows that I've seen what went on and explains that he's a childhood friend since 2nd grade, I know they went to the same high school at least, so of course I believe her.

I trust her completely, I know her thoughts are entirely with me and that she would never cheat on me. It was natural for her to get defensive, I certainly would have too, even if it was innocent. And like I said, the guy knew about me and knew that normally she would come home to see me. What does irritate me is that on a college campus all year long this guy has been randomly initiating hugs with my girlfriend who she sees as a brother-like figure.

My question is just this, His intentions can't be entirely good, can they?

I have never hugged a girl randomly just for being a friend. Only to comfort them in bad situations, but not just run up to a friend and hug her...

The whole thing just bothers me. Thanks for those who took the time to read this.

CK

i really wouldnt think anything of this. A few girls I know like to hug just to say hello. Even if I just hang out with them for like one night next time I see them = hug. I dont see anything weird about this.

 

[CKDragon]

Originally posted by: mchammer187

i really wouldnt think anything of this. A few girls I know like to hug just to say hello. Even if I just hang out with them for like one night next time I see them = hug. I dont see anything weird about this.

Thanks for the reassurance.

I guess this thread just brought it back up in my mind as something I was never really cool with. I feel pretty juvenile for letting something like this bother me, but it did so I'm not going to deny it for fear of coming across as insecure.

Thanks for the input,

CK

 

[AreaCode707]

Hugging is a routine way for me to say hi to my friends, both guy and girl. I'd say that you should think nothing of it.

 

[joohang]

Is it truely possible to be 'best friends' with a girl?

No.

 

[Nefrodite]

well chris rocks eloquent take on it

Rock's understanding of platonic relationships amounts to men and women they haven't slept with . . . yet.

"Somewhere the man took a wrong turn and ended up in the friend zone. He just has to figure a way out," commented Rock. Meanwhile, he seemed to think that women keep platonic friends because "You never know." To women, male friends are "a dick in a glass case: break open in case of emergency."

 

[coolVariable]

No!
I don't think so!
Even if neither of them is interested in the other in THAT way.
Been there (she wasn't that good looking and had a friend => both of us were not interested in the other).

 

[Spagina]

Originally posted by: HotChic
So does that mean that my close guy friends are bound to 'like' me sooner or later? I won't buy that, I know them, I frequently know who they're interested in, and I don't think any of them see me as being someone they could ever date.

Ah, how naive. Trust me, most guys that become friends with girls... are ATTRACTED to that girl and would have a relationship with her at the drop of the dime. Don't delude yourself, that's how it is, they wouldn't be associating with you if they didn't find you attractive. Now, if they already have girlfriends and hang out with you, then it may be less of an issue, but if they are single, there is some level going on there.

 

[KahunaHube]

Quote

Originally posted by: Spagina
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Originally posted by: HotChic
So does that mean that my close guy friends are bound to 'like' me sooner or later? I won't buy that, I know them, I frequently know who they're interested in, and I don't think any of them see me as being someone they could ever date.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Ah, how naive. Trust me, most guys that become friends with girls... are ATTRACTED to that girl and would have a relationship with her at the drop of the dime. Don't delude yourself, that's how it is, they wouldn't be associating with you if they didn't find you attractive. Now, if they already have girlfriends and hang out with you, then it may be less of an issue, but if they are single, there is some level going on there.

so true, why do you females think guys approached them to begin with? Surely not to say, hey that girl looks like shed be a good friend 99% of the time after this guys are friends with the girl because they couldn't get with her and are just hanging around hoping for a chance. Of course there are still isolated incidents of this not being true, but not most of the time

 

[gopunk]

if you ever have any doubts, watch "when harry met sally".

you may think that you will never be in that situation, but trust me, it happens time and time again. i was friends with this chick for a good 3 years with NO such feelings, and guess what, i started to like her (though i'm over that now )

disbelieve if you want, but you will see the light when it's 3AM and you're in a comatose state of depression because she got a bf and she keeps on telling you about how great things are between them. you won't even see it coming... things will be going fine... but then one day one of you gets dumped. and starts to get a little lonely... then magically notices how you two get along so well...

 

[tops2]

um..i don't think so
there's always some kinda chemistry between real good guy and girl friends...

 

[dude]

Originally posted by: UberDave
I've been wondering about this because it seems like the girls i've been close with that are friends- I kinda want to get with. Even my best friends and their so called 'best friend that is a girl' i KNOW they would be with them in a blink of an eye if the girl decided that she wanted to. Is there anyone out there that has a best friend that is a girl and.... Are NOT attracted to them "like that"? Is it possible???

Yes, it's possible. When I was with my eX. She always was with these two other girls. Damn, they were cute!
Anyways, she would cut off my pecker if I tried anything with them so....... I had to remove those selfish, yummy, tasty, delicious, young girls from my mind.

 

[Hammer]

Two of my best friends are girls, and neither one is my girlfriend. Am I attracted to them? No, I think of them as sisters. Are they attractive? Yes, they are. It all depends on how you view your friend. Now, you're probably saying its BS that I'm not attracted to them when they're hot. Its not, I just don't think of them in that way.

 

[Cyco]

I was "best friends" with a girl throughout my high school years. Her mother wanted us to hook up which was kind of weird, but we were content with just being friends. After a while, it seemed almost incestuous to want to be something other than friends. We eventually went our seperate ways after graduating, but it was great while it lasted.

 

[SpecialEd]

geezz... morons... Of course you can be best friends with a girl!! and you dont' have to be in a relationship either!

now sexual tension and attraction... thats impossible to avoid... but its normal!!!

some of my bestest friends in the world are girls... and sometimes I do hookup with them! (if we happen to both be single at the time that is...) but that doesn't have to ruin a friendship... some people here need to learn how to control their hormones.

 

[StageLeft]

Only if you're a couple or you are gay.

 

[DaiShan]

Originally posted by: minendo
Yes it is possible. My girlfriend is my best friend. Only one of those statuses will change with time.

I don't know if it is possible to be best friends with a girl and not be attracted to them due to the reason above.

LOL @ Minendo, anyways, one of my best friends is a girl, we tried the dating thing for a while a year or so ago, nothing came out of it, and we are just really great friends now. IMO she is more valuable to me as a friend.

 

[Zigaronious]

i don't think it's possible to be friends with a girl without liking her first. i think every girl that i am friends with, i liked at one point in time. after i got over that, i am able to be good friends with them.

 

[shiner]

My best friend is a girl, has been for quite some time. Would never think about "getting with her" because she's like a sister to me.