It wasn't meant to be some uber-actionified movie though. It was just about cool CGI, giant robots fighting shit, and Megan Fox's tight little body. That mixed with adults' nostalgia and kids love for toys and getting a semi-chub hearing Optimus say "Autobots, roll out!" was the entire point of the movie.
Atomic Playboy
Lifer
- Feb 6, 2007
- 16,432
- 1
- 81
Where to start...
First, as Foxery pointed out, and I can't believe it took until the fourth page for anyone to do so, Transformers originated as a cartoon designed to sell toys to children. It was a classic 1980s gambit, where rather than come up with an entertaining cartoon (a la Hanna Barbera), you design a toy and then construct a cartoon around it. They did it with GI Joe, they did it with Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, and yes, they did it with Transformers. So the whole concept of Transformers is a story that is tacked on to an existing toy product as a means to sell more toys; it was never a great plot to begind with. For further examples of trying to adapt these plots to live action film, go back and watch the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movies; those are some quality films right there.
Once you realize that Transformers, like the rest of the prime 1980s half-hour glorified toy commercials, was never intended as high drama, you can look at it for what it's really worth; it's mindless entertainment, pure and simple. If you went into a movie adaptation of any advertisement, you wouldn't really expect too much (except maybe that M. Night Shyamalan Visa commercial from a couple years ago). Why should this be any different?
Taking that into account, your next argument is ludicrous; specifically, "So you make a feature length movoe based on the same plot and sell it to adults?" Obviously something worked; worldwide, it's done over $700 million in ticket sales. I know, it's difficult to fathom why people spend their money the way they do; I'm having a hell of a time figuring out why the hell Paris Hilton is so famous. But it's hard to argue that whatever the producers did, they made tons of money off it. Clearly, they knew what they were doing. I'm not arguing that ticket sales equate to quality, but the whole reason Transformers exists has always been purely commercial, so to that end, it was a smashing success.
Finally your argument disintegrates into a line of ad hominem attacks: "Your brain was supposed to evolve," "the nerd population of this forum," "grow the fuck up," and "I am talking to a bunch that still jacks off to asian cartoon movies" specifically. These do nothing to help your argument. If anything, they function with a suitable amount of irony to make you, the one who is claiming that your brain evolves as you become an adult, look like the immature one in this "debate." If your brain is incapable of grasping that a major reason people go to films is to escape having to think, I can't help you. It also may help you to look at when Transformers was released: July, 2007. What else was released in that period? Live Free or Die Hard, License to Wed, Evan Almighty and Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer. These are not the most cerebral of films. It's summer, for God's sake... anyone expecting Oscar-quality films is delusional.
I'd write more, but this Hentai isn't going to jack off to itself.
Movie sucked, not because of the plot, but because of the awful acting, especially by the Aussie chick.
First of all, Papa Smurf didn't create Smurfette. Gargamel did. She was sent in as Gargamel's evil spy with the intention of destroying the Smurf village, but the overwhelming goodness of the Smurf way of life transformed her. And as for the whole gang-bang scenario, it just couldn't happen. Smurfs are asexual. They don't even have... reproductive organs under those little, white pants. It's just so illogical, you know, about being a Smurf. You know, what's the point of living... if you don't have a dick?
0roo0roo
No Lifer
- Sep 21, 2002
- 64,795
- 84
- 91
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Smurfette
papa smurf made her hot
they maybe asexual, but they seemed to get a hard on over smurfette
0roo0roo
No Lifer
- Sep 21, 2002
- 64,795
- 84
- 91
BROOKE GLADSTONE: After Smurfette nearly destroys the Smurf village, Papa Smurf takes her into his cottage, which doubles as a lab, and makes some alternations. Along with eradicating her dark side, he makes her a blonde and magically supplies a prettier dress and high-heeled shoes. In short, Smurfette becomes an upstanding member of Smurf Village when she becomes Barbie.
THIERRY CULLIFORD: Yeah, exactly. It was a cliché ? you know, the poor little girl with the black hair and nobody wants to look at her, and she felt pretty alone. And then Papa Smurf decide to transform her into a bimbo.
BROOKE GLADSTONE: Heather Hendershot.
HEATHER HENDERSHOT: In some myths, the creation of woman is deeply sort of sexist and in other, more maternally-centered cultures, is less sexist. And that clearly sounds like a sexist [LAUGHS] creation, that there is just nothing really positive you can get out of that, right?
http://www.onthemedia.org/transcripts/2008/02/29/07
THIERRY CULLIFORD: Yeah, exactly. It was a cliché ? you know, the poor little girl with the black hair and nobody wants to look at her, and she felt pretty alone. And then Papa Smurf decide to transform her into a bimbo.
BROOKE GLADSTONE: Heather Hendershot.
HEATHER HENDERSHOT: In some myths, the creation of woman is deeply sort of sexist and in other, more maternally-centered cultures, is less sexist. And that clearly sounds like a sexist [LAUGHS] creation, that there is just nothing really positive you can get out of that, right?
http://www.onthemedia.org/transcripts/2008/02/29/07
MmmSkyscraper
Diamond Member
- Jul 6, 2004
- 9,472
- 1
- 76
Yeah, this is up there with the corportate [sic] whistleblowing and the harrowing bus journey threads.
Heh. I grew up watching it. I also watch the original series every now and then. That movie blows. Rather watch the original movie from 86 any day of the week.
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