is it a good thing to shield your children from alcohol?

[nageov3t]

so, I'm going to a friends house for dinner with his family later in the week... we're good friends, but I've never been over to his house before because his wife hates me but now I guess she doesn't anymore. naturally, I ask if I can bring anything, and his response is "anything except alcohol, we don't like the kid to be exposed to it." (the kid = their 2 year-old son)

kinda made me scratch my head... I wasn't planning on bringing liquor and it's their kid so it's none of my business, but still, it seems weird and counterintuitive to me. the people I've known with the biggest alcohol problems tended to be the ones who grew up in totally dry households, where alcohol was some kind of dangerous drug that was never spoken of. when they finally did get access to it, they went off the deep end.

I grew up in a household where drinking was the norm. I never saw my parents drunk much less smashed (except once, when I swear my mom called me drunk off her ass, but she was away for the weekend down the shore with some girlfriends), but some wine with meals or enjoying something on the rocks while sitting around after a dinner party was pretty much the status quo growing up.

edit: for what it's worth, I'm bringing chocolate peanut butter cookies... standard PB cookies with some melted high-quality chocolate mixed in and rolled into sugar balls.

 

[Ns1]

so, I'm going to a friends house for dinner with his family later in the week... we're good friends, but I've never been over to his house before because his wife hates me but now I guess she doesn't anymore. naturally, I ask if I can bring anything, and his response is "anything except alcohol, we don't like the kid to be exposed to it." (the kid = their 2 year-old son)

kinda made me scratch my head... I wasn't planning on bringing liquor and it's their kid so it's none of my business, but still, it seems weird and counterintuitive to me. the people I've known with the biggest alcohol problems tended to be the ones who grew up in totally dry households, where alcohol was some kind of dangerous drug that was never spoken of. when they finally did get access to it, they went off the deep end.

I grew up in a household where drinking was the norm. I never saw my parents drunk much less smashed (except once, when I swear my mom called me drunk off her ass, but she was away for the weekend down the shore with some girlfriends), but some wine with meals or enjoying something on the rocks while sitting around after a dinner party was pretty much the status quo growing up.

only if you want them to drink themselves to a stupor when they're 16

//edit

my first threadjack in a while.

 

[Crusty]

Go abstinence!!

 

[spidey07]

That's one way to have an alcoholic kid. It's one of the reasons other countries don't have such a big problem with alcohol abuse as the states, kids are exposed to it early, drink it early and understand moderation.

 

[surfsatwerk]

Originally posted by: loki8481
so, I'm going to a friends house for dinner with his family later in the week... we're good friends, but I've never been over to his house before because his wife hates me but now I guess she doesn't anymore. naturally, I ask if I can bring anything, and his response is "anything except alcohol, we don't like the kid to be exposed to it." (the kid = their 2 year-old son)

kinda made me scratch my head... I wasn't planning on bringing liquor and it's their kid so it's none of my business, but still, it seems weird and counterintuitive to me. the people I've known with the biggest alcohol problems tended to be the ones who grew up in totally dry households, where alcohol was some kind of dangerous drug that was never spoken of. when they finally did get access to it, they went off the deep end.

I grew up in a household where drinking was the norm. I never saw my parents drunk much less smashed (except once, when I swear my mom called me drunk off her ass, but she was away for the weekend down the shore with some girlfriends), but some wine with meals or enjoying something on the rocks while sitting around after a dinner party was pretty much the status quo growing up.

edit: for what it's worth, I'm bringing chocolate peanut butter cookies... standard PB cookies with some melted high-quality chocolate mixed in and rolled into sugar balls.

if you shield your children from booze then they won't know how to deal with it as adults.

"just say no" lollers.

 

[Kirby]

the best thing to do is wait until the kid is about 13, give em a bottle of aristocrat and make them drink until they puke.

negative reinforcement ftw!

 

[Insomniator]

As always it all depends on the person. Some can be shielded and fine, some can be shielded and turn into alcoholics.

IMO shielding is always the worst way to go however.

 

[HardcoreRobot]

i think its a bad idea. but there are also people out there that think you can stop violence by shielding people from guns, stop drug abuse by shielding people from drugs, and curing poverty by giving people money

so i guess its not that unusual

 

[rudder]

My dad is German so I have been around beer as long as I can remember. At first I thought I should hide it from my kids... but then thought about all the kids I knew growing up whose parents would not let them have sugar. They would come over and gorge themselves on a box of cookies.

No point in keeping it a mystery from the kids. Teach them responsibility and all will be good.

 

[polarmystery]

My mother is from Spain and growing up she always thought it was weird to prevent me from having a drink. She'd ask me if I ever wanted anything from the store and a few times I'd say yes (I was like 10 at the time). Growing up with alcohol was nothing for me and it made the nostalgia of drinking at 21 almost nothing. I never got in trouble with it, it was always controlled at our house and I never abused it. When I have kids I will do the same thing. She trusted me with it (hell I even had alcohol at bday party when I turned 13 but it was under control) and I didn't want to abuse that trust. Now I hardly drink it anyway.

 

[polarmystery]

Originally posted by: rudder
My dad is German so I have been around beer as long as I can remember. At first I thought I should hide it from my kids... but then thought about all the kids I knew growing up whose parents would not let them have sugar. They would come over and gorge themselves on a box of cookies.

No point in keeping it a mystery from the kids. Teach them responsibility and all will be good.

beat me to it. (pretty much the same story)

 

[Chryso]

Bring rum cake.

 

[Pheran]

That's silly, we drink wine around my daughter (nearly 4) all the time, she understands that it is a "grown up drink." When she gets (much) older I will let her try it and explain responsible alcohol use.

 

[TallBill]

Anything that you "shield" a person from will ultimately be discovered, enjoyed, and abused.

 

[Joemonkey]

I really don't see the point, it would be like "shielding them" from violence, sexuality, fatty foods, homsexuality, religion, etc.

Having alcohol "around" vs letting them drink is different too

i rubbed whisky on my daughter's gums when she was teething and she gets a small drink of beer or wine now and then and she's 4yo.

 

[Crusty]

Originally posted by: rudder
My dad is German so I have been around beer as long as I can remember. At first I thought I should hide it from my kids... but then thought about all the kids I knew growing up whose parents would not let them have sugar. They would come over and gorge themselves on a box of cookies.

No point in keeping it a mystery from the kids. Teach them responsibility and all will be good.

:thumbsup:

My parents let me have my first 'drink' when I was in 5th grade. They gave me a small glass of champagne on Christmas during a vacation to Hawaii. Aside from that they never went out of their way to hide drinking, but they also didn't get smashed all the time either. After that I didn't really start to drink with my friends until the end of my senior year in HS.

 

[MrChad]

My 2 year old son calls my beer bottle "daddy's juice"

 

[thegimp03]

Yeah, kind of weird. Kid won't be able to remember anything from when he is 2 anyways. I think my parents used my 1st and 2nd birthdays as an opportunity to invite all their friends and neighbors over and throw giant parties (of course, with alcohol at them). I have to agree with others in the thread that the kids who weren't around it when they were young were the ones who became drunks, some starting when they hit 15 and 16 years old.

 

[SunSamurai]

Shielding kids from things like that only serves to give them a huge disadvantage when they inevitably do have to deal with it. Moderation and guidance. Dont be a dipshit.

 

[nageov3t]

Originally posted by: rudder
My dad is German so I have been around beer as long as I can remember. At first I thought I should hide it from my kids... but then thought about all the kids I knew growing up whose parents would not let them have sugar. They would come over and gorge themselves on a box of cookies.

No point in keeping it a mystery from the kids. Teach them responsibility and all will be good.

:thumbsup:

growing up, food in my house was like what I guess drugs/alcohol were in my friends' houses. I'd probably have gotten in more trouble for bringing home a half-empty bottle of coke in my backpack than coming home drunk off my ass. it all let to me being 400+ pounds in my mid 20's.

I've become such an ocd eater since I've been losing weight that I'm like perpetually worried about screwing with my kids heads if I have kids someday.

 

[MichaelD]

Yes, absolutely it is. Because when the alcohol rains down from the sky the only thing keeping your children from burning alive is the fact that you're holding the alcohol shield over them. Good on you, Dad!!!

That said, you will be a guest in someone else's home and they set the rules in their home. If they say no alcohol, then I would not bring any, regardless of how fucking lame their reason is. Their home=their rules, end of story.

However, if it WAS ME....I would stop hanging out with them b/c they are obviously Jesus Freaks who think that anyone who drinks The Liquid Devil is a warmongering, 13-year old girl buggering, Satan-worshipping Democrat.

Either that or his wife has his balls in her pocket (most probable excuse based on what you've told us). Bring your brownies, pretend to have a good time and then erase his Contact entry from your Outlook at work and your celly.

 

[l0cke]

I've got a friend who is going to college this month and it will be his first time away from his parents. They try to shield him from everything. They don't let him drive even though he has his liscense and he has to come home by 10pm on weekends.

Can you imagine what he will do when he gets to college?

 

[amdhunter]

Originally posted by: MrChad
My 2 year old son calls my beer bottle "daddy's juice"

Is that anything like "Jesus juice?" Am I gonna have to call the authorities?

 

[40Hands]

They're shielding a 2 year old from booze?

 

[Glitchny]

I'm not a fan of shielding kids from it either, teaches them how alcohol can be enjoyed responsibly if they see their parents drinking and not getting wasted. Hell when I was a baby teething my dad would dip his finger in his bourbon and rub it on my gums, numbed me up and stopped crying. And I very seldom get drunk, I do hate bourbon though... hmmmm.