• We’re currently investigating an issue related to the forum theme and styling that is impacting page layout and visual formatting. The problem has been identified, and we are actively working on a resolution. There is no impact to user data or functionality, this is strictly a front-end display issue. We’ll post an update once the fix has been deployed. Thanks for your patience while we get this sorted.

Is homosexuality by choice or by birth?

Page 17 - Seeking answers? Join the AnandTech community: where nearly half-a-million members share solutions and discuss the latest tech.
GeekDrew you may be surprised about people after thier "defense mechanisms" chill.

One thing I was really surprised about was my parents reaction to my oldest brother who is gay. My parents are hard core church goers but when they found out (course they probably already knew since signs are telling, like, 40 never married may have been a clue) my dad, a hardcore MCarthyist said "oh well, every family has one, we love you anyway" 😎 As usual, with reasonable and caring people, it's the content of thier charachter not thier lifstyle which makes people like you or dislike you. Anyway, cool that you make no appologies here, don't in real life either. I don't for being a a-hole lifes too short😀
 
Originally posted by: boredtodeath
Topic Title: Is homosexuality by choice or by birth?

It doesn't matter.

Other people have no business worrying about the sexuality of others other than themself.

That is the primary problem with having the Government and/or the Church peering into and behind closed bedroom doors.
 
Sure, let's cure "The Gay." Why don't you cure the "Darkies" while you're at it, Grand Dragon?

Your response is not reasonable and it would appear that you're just trying to stir things up.

Without making futher childish rebuttals and stooping to name calling, why not tell me what, in your opinion, is wrong with trying to find a cause and a cure? I think we've all heard from time to time (unless someone has NO gay friends or aquaintances) homosexuals make remarks like:

"If I had a choice do you think I'd choose to be gay."

or

"I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy."

or

"If I could just decide to be straight I would, but I can't.



All of those statements appear to indicate that in at least some cases, homosexuals would prefer that they weren't homosexual. Since homosexuality isn't the norm and could quite possibly be prevented (I never said "cured", you did) why would we not spend the money to try? If in a hundred years all the people who would have been gay are instead born with normal heterosexual attractions and marry, raise families and live a happy life, would you consider that a BAD thing?

How about other abnormalities? Are you against finding a cause and preventing things like Down's Syndrome? How about autism? People with those abnormalities are people and have a right to live and be happy, but that doesn't mean that we shouldn't look for ways to prevent future people from having to suffer the same fate. Would you also call me a "Grand Dragon" for wanting to learn ways that retardation could be prevented?

Again, YOU are the one who is making the inflammatory assertions (like equating homosexuality with being black), so please back off and have a reasonable and logic conversation.

Joe
 
Joe they make those statements because bigots in society make thier life hell. I'm sure most blacks would rather been white in the past too for the same reasons.
 
Originally posted by: dmcowen674
Originally posted by: boredtodeath
Topic Title: Is homosexuality by choice or by birth?

It doesn't matter.

Other people have no business worrying about the sexuality of others other than themself.

That is the primary problem with having the Government and/or the Church peering into and behind closed bedroom doors.

I totally agree. But unfortunately people who are into deviant sexual lifestyles want those lifestyles to NOT remain "behind bedroom doors", but instead want to display it in public and demand that everyone else accept it as ok.

Joe
 
Originally posted by: Netopia
So let's say that it IS in fact a fact at birth. If it's a genetic or developmental defect, why is there no money being put towards finding out the cause and CORRECTING it? Pro-Homosexual groups will spend ALL SORTS of money to promote their behavior and yet they don't spend a dime trying to help future people from the same fate. No one in politics is going to suggest it because they'd be labelled a "homophobe" or "bigot" because it's not PC to not openly and happily accept homosexuality as an equal and equivolent lifestyle.

Joe

There's nothing to correct.
The way we help future people from the same fate is by not treating them as outcasts.
 
Originally posted by: Zebo
Joe they make those statements because bigots in society make thier life hell. I'm sure most blacks would rather been white in the past too for the same reasons.

Zebo, you make a good point and I'm sure that in some instances it's just what you say. OTOH, I've known people (and even done some counselling) who were "gay" and didn't want to be. People who thought that their proclivities were simply abnormal and wrong and who wanted to break the cycle. The problem with this whole subject is that there simply isn't a definitive answer, every person is different.

I knew a girl in High School who was used and hurt by a number of guys (emotionally). She wasn't the best looking woman, but she had a sweet nature and was generally a nice person. She continued to get hurt in college; guys being nice just to get sex but then wanting nothing to do with her. At one point, after she'd been hurt again, another girl in college befriended her and started hanging out with her all the time. Girl #2 was a lesbian. Within six months girl #1 was calling herself one too and was dating only women. Do I think that she was born that way? Nope... I think it was a defense mechanism and part of a desire to be loved and wanted. So here's a case where I believe that someone, at some level, "chose" to be gay... but that doesn't mean everyone does.

Joe
 
Just because I cant resist putting in my $0.02. I think that homosexuality is a defense system. So that people that are defective in some way shape or form, don?t reproduce. Sort of natures own gene pool maintenance.
 
There's nothing to correct.
The way we help future people from the same fate is by not treating them as outcasts.

We should treat people well anyway, but if it is a genetic flaw or defect in the womb, why not fix it before birth? I've yet to hear any arguement as to why we should burden someone with a mixed up physical/sexual identity if we can help them instead.

I don't know how many of you are parents, but if you (if you're a woman) or your wife were pregnant and the doctor could tell you "this child is going to be attracted to the same sex but we can easily straighten out the homemone levels and correct it", would you say "no, leave the hormones at wacky levels and he/she will comeout whatever way" or would you say "yes, please bring the hormone levels to normal for my baby"?

Joe
 
Originally posted by: Netopia
There's nothing to correct.
The way we help future people from the same fate is by not treating them as outcasts.

We should treat people well anyway, but if it is a genetic flaw or defect in the womb, why not fix it before birth? I've yet to hear any arguement as to why we should burden someone with a mixed up physical/sexual identity if we can help them instead.

I don't know how many of you are parents, but if you (if you're a woman) or your wife were pregnant and the doctor could tell you "this child is going to be attracted to the same sex but we can easily straighten out the homemone levels and correct it", would you say "no, leave the hormones at wacky levels and he/she will comeout whatever way" or would you say "yes, please bring the hormone levels to normal for my baby"?

Joe

It's not a flaw or a defect to be fixed or corrected. You're not listening.
 
It's not a flaw or a defect to be fixed or corrected. You're not listening.

I'm not going to be back until tomorrow (busy evening), but let's say I'm trying to listen. Explain your point of view so as to help me to understand. Why is it not a flaw or defect? If all were born with this trait it would be the end of the species, so it's rather hard for me to see it as something that is to be viewed as "the norm" or "normal". I'm truly NOT trying to be obtuse here... infact I am trying to (as much as possible) simply factual and not start spouting religious beliefs and the like, but just look at it from a physiological and medical perspective.

Help me to understand your stance.

Joe
 
Originally posted by: zodder
A bigot? No. I have absolutely no problems with peoples' choices and I certainly hold no ill will towards those who don't choose the same path that I do. That doesn't make me intollerent or bigotted. I'm just answering the OP question with my honest opinion.

Ah. In that case, sorry for jumping to conclusions. You are aware that most people are going to tag you as such though. 😛

- M4H
 
Originally posted by: Netopia
Your response is not reasonable and it would appear that you're just trying to stir things up.

Without making futher childish rebuttals and stooping to name calling

Not going to happen.

why not tell me what, in your opinion, is wrong with trying to find a cause and a cure?

Because, as difficult as this might be for you to grasp, even though you've been told many times by many different members, homosexuality is not a disease.

I think we've all heard from time to time (unless someone has NO gay friends or aquaintances) homosexuals make remarks like:

"If I had a choice do you think I'd choose to be gay."
or
"I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy."
or
"If I could just decide to be straight I would, but I can't.



All of those statements appear to indicate that in at least some cases, homosexuals would prefer that they weren't homosexual.

No, they'd prefer to be treated with equal respect as the "normal" heterosexual couples. The only reason I've ever heard my gay friends make these statements is under the context of being harassed. Shocking idea here - maybe if people quit being such jackasses to anyone who's gay, we might stop hearing those phrases?

Since homosexuality isn't the norm and could quite possibly be prevented (I never said "cured", you did) why would we not spend the money to try?

Netopia @ 09/29/2004 04:15 PM: "why is there no money being put towards finding out the cause and CORRECTING it?"

Want some mustard to go with your foot?

If in a hundred years all the people who would have been gay are instead born with normal heterosexual attractions and marry, raise families and live a happy life, would you consider that a BAD thing?

Yes, simply because I certainly wouldn't consider it a good thing. What do I or any other heterosexual member of the human race have to gain from your scenario - other than more competition for mates? 😛

How about other abnormalities? Are you against finding a cause and preventing things like Down's Syndrome? How about autism?

Unlike "The Gay", those are known mental conditions. The degree to which they can be cured or prevented is pretty much zero, unless you're talking about aborting fetuses that show the symptoms while in utero. In that case, let's skip the hogwash and jump into genetic engineering with both feet. I want my son to be 6'0" tall, with a twelve-inch dong, fullback physique, and Einstien IQ.

People with those abnormalities are people and have a right to live and be happy, but that doesn't mean that we shouldn't look for ways to prevent future people from having to suffer the same fate. Would you also call me a "Grand Dragon" for wanting to learn ways that retardation could be prevented?

Have you ever actually had the chance to work with someone who's autistic or retarded? Not retarded in the sense of the kiddies on this forum, but truly mentally challenged? I've seen more happy faces in wheelchairs than at "Normal" parties.

"Normal" kids cry because Daddy didn't buy them that new BMW for graduation - they had to get a Focus.
A kid with MS is delighted that he made it through the afternoon without collapsing.
Who's happier?

Again, YOU are the one who is making the inflammatory assertions (like equating homosexuality with being black), so please back off and have a reasonable and logic conversation.

Joe

You call homosexuality a "disease" or "genetic defect" and you want a logical conversation? Good luck with that.

If all were born with this trait it would be the end of the species, so it's rather hard for me to see it as something that is to be viewed as "the norm" or "normal".

Just because it is not the majority does not make it wrong.

I'll make sure to requote this when/if you return to this thread.

- M4H
 
Originally posted by: fisher
it's quite obviously a choice. haven't you seen the will and grace where um, wait.

anyway, a choice. duh.

I do hope my sarcasm meter is broken, but you aren't seriously relying on TV for that decision, are you?
 
Netopia @ 09/29/2004 04:15 PM: "why is there no money being put towards finding out the cause and CORRECTING it?"

Want some mustard to go with your foot?

No thanks, but might I suggest you at least attempt to learn how grammar works and how one word relates to another? Allow me to dumb it down for you "..finding out the cause and CORRECTING it?" Now since there is only ONE noun (the cause) directly preceding the pronoun (it), anyone with elementary reading skills would see that the correction is directed at the CAUSE of the situation. I've never said "round up the gays and FIX THEM..." which is what you seem to be inferring. What I said, taken IN CONTEXT was regarding a PRE-BIRTH situation. Find what's wrong and fix it BEFORE there is a person who needs to be (in YOUR words) cured.



Yes, simply because I certainly wouldn't consider it a good thing. What do I or any other heterosexual member of the human race have to gain from your scenario - other than more competition for mates?

Well, if you are married then it SHOULDN'T be competition for a mate. However, I would think that we would all want our children to have every advantage in life, including the ability to marry and procreate in a normal manner. Perhaps that holds no value to you, which is why you hold your stance.

Unlike "The Gay", those are known mental conditions. The degree to which they can be cured or prevented is pretty much zero, unless you're talking about aborting fetuses that show the symptoms while in utero. In that case, let's skip the hogwash and jump into genetic engineering with both feet. I want my son to be 6'0" tall, with a twelve-inch dong, fullback physique, and Einstien IQ.

You do like to jump to the extreme don't you? How about a scenario where an expectant mother is discovered to have a homonal imbalance that is going to drastically effect the child and feed it way too much or way too little of specific hormones? Something that could EASILY be corrected and probably SHOULD be corrected even for the Mother's sake. You don't have to go to the extreme to see that there can be conditions in the womb that get people all screwed up. What about hermaphodites? Would you also (since it's not a mental disorder) not try to help correct things in the womb that lead to these people having to live lives that are often miserable and confusing? Oh... wait... that's right, it's all society's fault these people wish they were different... yeah, I remember seeing a big KKK ralley in the paper about anti-hermaphrodite issues: NOT!

Yeah, I've been around mentally challenged kids... not many, but a few. I even read an incredibly interesting article in the NY Time Science section about a grown severely autistic man who learned to read and write even though he can't speak... and so for the first time ever, scientists can truly communicate with a severely autistic person. Sometimes his life is HELL... touch is pain, hearing is pain, sight is excruciating pain... so your point is that if we could prevent autism that we should just let it be? And BTW, MS isn't a mental disease it's a horrible neurological one... would you do nothing to prevent people from developing that either?

You call homosexuality a "disease" or "genetic defect" and you want a logical conversation? Good luck with that.

Why? Serious, why? There is NO definitive evidense one way or the other. For every "study" that says one thing about homosexuality there's another that says the opposite. So how do you DEFINITIVELY prove your position? You know what? You can't... and neither can I. The difference between us, I think, is that you've been programmed by society to see things a certain way and won't even consider the possibility of anything else. Note I didn't say "believe" anything else... you won't even CONSIDER other possibilities. That being the case, since you reject as impossible what I'm saying is a possibility, what is your FACT about the cause of homosexuality? SOMETHING has to cause it, so what is it?

Just because it is not the majority does not make it wrong.

I agree with you on that. The truth of the world is MIGHT MAKES RIGHT, but I hope that any society I live in tries hard not to follow that manner of authority. And you know what? I'm a minority... I'm left handed. I am a member of about 10% of the population whose life expectancy is shorter. People don't keep "left handed" things aroung and I have to adapt and sometimes do things which are uncomfortable. If I could suddenly be right handed, have a longer life expectancy and an easier life... I WOULD! If someone could go back and change it so that I was right handed to start with, that would be even better. I'm not asking the world to change or have everything equal access for me or supply everything to me in a left handed model... that would be wrong, I'm the one with the issue at hand, so I should change, not ask the other 90% to change to accomadate me.

Joe
 
netopia's making an arguement for eugenics apparently😛 inconvenient people should be wiped out. people who are handicapped only due to the ignorance and bigotry of society are directly comparable to people who are handicapped physically and mentally to a degree they have severe trouble even functioning on a basic level😛 give me a break.

like it or not the evidence is stacking up against your position, and all religious groups fall upon are descredited studies at best, and at worst and most commonly worthless anecdotal evidence.

and comparing whom you love to handedness just shows how desperate you are. left handed people today are not persecuted, not cast as evil sinnerswho will go to hell if not saved😛 and comparing having to build different models to simply expanding an institution is incorrect. the level of inconvenience is not the same. tax payers would be subsidizing a left handed user to build more expensive specialized models. there is nothing speciallized about expanding the institution of marriage for all. its like saying that giving women the vote is just f*cking selfish and inconvenient. heck, giving blacks and minorities rights and the right to vote is infringing on the convenience of the majority by your pitiful reasoning.
 
Mental disorder.

Originally posted by: dmcowen674
That is the primary problem with having the Government and/or the Church peering into and behind closed bedroom doors.

The problem is, it doesn't stay behind bedroom doors. I don't have any problem with homosexuals that don't shove it in people's faces at every opprtunity, trying to get them to 'accept them for who they are' or one of 1,000 other genaric whine-ass attention-whore statements.
 
I think it's funny that a bunch of straight people are discussing this.

I'm gay, I think you may be genetically predisposed to it, but when it comes down to it, it's a choice. Do you want a chicken sandwich or a steak for dinner? Do you want a girl or a guy?

I just don't see why it's such a big deal. Who cares if it's a choice or not? What's it matter? I just live my life the way I want to, and if anyone has a problem with it, too bad. If they want to make a point out of it, I'll kick their ass.

So, straight people, enough of this silly thread. You're not getting anywhere anyways.
 
Originally posted by: Nebor
I think it's funny that a bunch of straight people are discussing this.

I'm gay, I think you may be genetically predisposed to it, but when it comes down to it, it's a choice. Do you want a chicken sandwich or a steak for dinner? Do you want a girl or a guy?

I just don't see why it's such a big deal. Who cares if it's a choice or not? What's it matter? I just live my life the way I want to, and if anyone has a problem with it, too bad. If they want to make a point out of it, I'll kick their ass.

So, straight people, enough of this silly thread. You're not getting anywhere anyways.

It's good to have you add your thoughts. Thanks for sharing. Do you think you could become straight?
 
Originally posted by: TuxDave
Originally posted by: Nebor
I think it's funny that a bunch of straight people are discussing this.

I'm gay, I think you may be genetically predisposed to it, but when it comes down to it, it's a choice. Do you want a chicken sandwich or a steak for dinner? Do you want a girl or a guy?

I just don't see why it's such a big deal. Who cares if it's a choice or not? What's it matter? I just live my life the way I want to, and if anyone has a problem with it, too bad. If they want to make a point out of it, I'll kick their ass.

So, straight people, enough of this silly thread. You're not getting anywhere anyways.

It's good to have you add your thoughts. Thanks for sharing. Do you think you could become straight?

I think I could. I could stop eating meat, or stop browsing ATOT if I really wanted to. But those are things I enjoy, so why would I stop?
 
Originally posted by: Nebor
Originally posted by: TuxDave
Originally posted by: Nebor
I think it's funny that a bunch of straight people are discussing this.

I'm gay, I think you may be genetically predisposed to it, but when it comes down to it, it's a choice. Do you want a chicken sandwich or a steak for dinner? Do you want a girl or a guy?

I just don't see why it's such a big deal. Who cares if it's a choice or not? What's it matter? I just live my life the way I want to, and if anyone has a problem with it, too bad. If they want to make a point out of it, I'll kick their ass.

So, straight people, enough of this silly thread. You're not getting anywhere anyways.

It's good to have you add your thoughts. Thanks for sharing. Do you think you could become straight?

I think I could. I could stop eating meat, or stop browsing ATOT if I really wanted to. But those are things I enjoy, so why would I stop?

I guess that's true. I guess the deep underlying debate is not whether or not a man can turn straight or gay but should a guy be punished for being gay. If he was gay by birth, then it would be unfair to punish him for it because it is not a harmful choice, it's just the way a person is. If it is a choice, then comes the really ugly debate of whether or not it's a harmful choice. I personally want to avoid that debate since it evolves into religious mud-slinging in the end.
 
Originally posted by: TuxDave
I guess that's true. I guess the deep underlying debate is not whether or not a man can turn straight or gay but should a guy be punished for being gay. If he was gay by birth, then it would be unfair to punish him for it because it is not a harmful choice, it's just the way a person is. If it is a choice, then comes the really ugly debate of whether or not it's a harmful choice. I personally want to avoid that debate since it evolves into religious mud-slinging in the end.

I don't see how religion should have anything to do with laws, or how people are treated in the United States of America.
 
Back
Top