I think I may have to dump my fiance

Page 4 - Seeking answers? Join the AnandTech community: where nearly half-a-million members share solutions and discuss the latest tech.

stag3

Diamond Member
Feb 7, 2005
3,623
0
76
i work 72 hour weeks right now, 45 a week is nothing, that's like a vacation to me rofl
 

TheGameIs21

Golden Member
Apr 23, 2001
1,329
0
0
Originally posted by: lilcam
She's been busting her butt working like 90+ hours every 2 weeks. I asked why she's killing herself and her answer is that we need money. That is true, but I dont want her working 90+ hours during her pay period! Well, I went to transfer some money into our savings account and noticed she took out $120. I have no problems with her spending money on meaningful things, but for her to pull it and give it to her mom to send to our native country is another thing!

She says she owes it to her grandmother to help pay for certain things. If you ask me, it's ALL BS. I realize we're better off but we have to worry about ourselves before we worry about someone else. She (her grandma) has other ppl to help out, why do they come asking my fiance for money. Mind you we have like $1800 in bills a month and you dont see other ppl offering to help, not that I want them to.

Anyways, I'm tired of this. We could use that extra money to help pay the car off. Mind you winter is around the corner and gas bill is going to be in the mid hundreds, not to mention gas for our car is ridiculous!!!!!!!!!! Belive me, I spoke with her regarding this many times but it doesnt work. I can't say anything since it's her family but she has to draw the line somewhere. Am I the one who's wrong?

[edit]Never mind. I'll just say the following:

What you should do is write up a new budget allowing for her to send $120 - $150 "home" and just plan on doing that. Once you are married to her, her family will become yours and you'll end up helping them anyway... why not budget for it. Get over your testosterone driven need to control her like that. She's helping her family, not buying a purse. You two could use that to pay towards the car but her grandmother is probably using it to buy medication or food or rent. [/edit]
 

bonkers325

Lifer
Mar 9, 2000
13,076
1
0
she works, doesn't she? that means its HER money... so what's the problem?

and you are a jerk. "my fiance cares for her family, i dont think she's the right one for me"

in short, yes you are wrong.
 

GhettoPeanut

Senior member
Feb 9, 2005
696
0
0
yeah dude, um 45 hours a week is really not that much, what country you from? some place in europe? france maybe? only place i know of that might consider 45 hours a long work week since they have the whole 35 hours a week thing going, which i'm sooo jelous about.
 

JEDI

Lifer
Sep 25, 2001
29,391
2,738
126
Originally posted by: lilcam
She's been busting her butt working like 90+ hours every 2 weeks. I asked why she's killing herself and her answer is that we need money. That is true, but I dont want her working 90+ hours during her pay period! Well, I went to transfer some money into our savings account and noticed she took out $120. I have no problems with her spending money on meaningful things, but for her to pull it and give it to her mom to send to our native country is another thing!

She says she owes it to her grandmother to help pay for certain things. If you ask me, it's ALL BS. I realize we're better off but we have to worry about ourselves before we worry about someone else. She (her grandma) has other ppl to help out, why do they come asking my fiance for money. Mind you we have like $1800 in bills a month and you dont see other ppl offering to help, not that I want them to.

Anyways, I'm tired of this. We could use that extra money to help pay the car off. Mind you winter is around the corner and gas bill is going to be in the mid hundreds, not to mention gas for our car is ridiculous!!!!!!!!!! Belive me, I spoke with her regarding this many times but it doesnt work. I can't say anything since it's her family but she has to draw the line somewhere. Am I the one who's wrong?

worthless w/o pics

btw- it's HER $. She worked it. if it bothers you, dump her. I'm sure there are others wanting to bang her
 

DVad3r

Diamond Member
Jan 3, 2005
5,340
3
81
Your not wrong, that was retarded of her. What is her native country if I may ask? One of my best friends has been doing that sh!t forever. With the amount he has already sent back to his country (for reasons still unknown to me) he could have had a car/house easy.
 

EKKC

Diamond Member
May 31, 2005
5,895
0
0
why do u care what she does with her money?

as long as she isnt making you pay for it. i say she has every right to spend the money on her own friggin family
 

DaShen

Lifer
Dec 1, 2000
10,710
1
0
He seems like a control freak to me.

Dump her if you want. It seems that if you two got together, your mind isn't in the right place anyways, you will probably end up breaking her heart anyways. Get your priorities straight. So she is helping out her family with her own money. What is the problem? 90+ hours isn't that much to begin with. Getting married won't allow you to completely control her life, so don't expect anything to completely change like that after marriage.

If she is neglecting her life and yours in the process of helping her family out, then you need to talk to her, but $120 isn't that much to complain about. And why are you paying $1800 dollars every month? Is that counting your living expenses, because that is a normal amount then and you should stop complaining.
 

Calin

Diamond Member
Apr 9, 2001
3,112
0
0
Originally posted by: mobobuff
I say it's the money she worked for, she can do whatever she wants with it (so long as she's not being fatally stupid with it).

I totally agree
 

RbSX

Diamond Member
Jan 18, 2002
8,351
1
76
Originally posted by: s0ssos
Originally posted by: RyanSengara
Originally posted by: s0ssos
Originally posted by: RyanSengara
Originally posted by: lilcam
Originally posted by: werk
Wait...90 hours every 2 weeks...45 hours a work week. That's not busting your butt!!!

The job she's in it is. So getting up @ 6 every morning and coming home around 9pm isnt? Then what is? I dont think I can do what she does, but then again I'm salary so it's worst.


Thats not 90 hours every two weeks moron. If it is, then she's not working every day.

If she works EVERYDAY for that period it's 150 hours every 2 working weeks.

hey moron, go back and read your first post. it was you who said 90+ every 2 weeks

READ HIS FIRST FVCKING SENTENCE.

Originally posted by: lilcam
She's been busting her butt working like 90+ hours every 2 weeks.

She's been busting her butt working like 90+ hours every 2 weeks. I asked why she's killing herself and her answer is that we need money. That is true, but I dont want her working 90+ hours during her pay period! Well, I went to transfer some money into our savings account and noticed she took out $120. I have no problems with her spending money on meaningful things, but for her to pull it and give it to her mom to send to our native country is another thing!

so, 90+ hours every 2 weeks. that means, um, 90+ hours every 1 week, according to ryan.
and pay period? hmm, pay periods are usually 2 weeks, as far as i know. or a month, if company's slower.

how do you get 90+ hours every 2 weeks to mean 90+ hours every week?


Because he said she works 90+ hours every two weeks, but GIVEN THE HOURS THAT SHE SAID SHE WORKS, it MAKES NO SENSE, unless she takes several days off per week.
 
Aug 26, 2004
14,685
1
76
Originally posted by: RyanSengara
Originally posted by: s0ssos
Originally posted by: RyanSengara
Originally posted by: s0ssos
Originally posted by: RyanSengara
Originally posted by: lilcam
Originally posted by: werk
Wait...90 hours every 2 weeks...45 hours a work week. That's not busting your butt!!!

The job she's in it is. So getting up @ 6 every morning and coming home around 9pm isnt? Then what is? I dont think I can do what she does, but then again I'm salary so it's worst.


Thats not 90 hours every two weeks moron. If it is, then she's not working every day.

If she works EVERYDAY for that period it's 150 hours every 2 working weeks.

hey moron, go back and read your first post. it was you who said 90+ every 2 weeks

READ HIS FIRST FVCKING SENTENCE.

Originally posted by: lilcam
She's been busting her butt working like 90+ hours every 2 weeks.

She's been busting her butt working like 90+ hours every 2 weeks. I asked why she's killing herself and her answer is that we need money. That is true, but I dont want her working 90+ hours during her pay period! Well, I went to transfer some money into our savings account and noticed she took out $120. I have no problems with her spending money on meaningful things, but for her to pull it and give it to her mom to send to our native country is another thing!

so, 90+ hours every 2 weeks. that means, um, 90+ hours every 1 week, according to ryan.
and pay period? hmm, pay periods are usually 2 weeks, as far as i know. or a month, if company's slower.

how do you get 90+ hours every 2 weeks to mean 90+ hours every week?


Because he said she works 90+ hours every two weeks, but GIVEN THE HOURS THAT SHE SAID SHE WORKS, it MAKES NO SENSE, unless she takes several days off per week.

good god, quote hell
 

alkemyst

No Lifer
Feb 13, 2001
83,769
19
81
Originally posted by: lilcam
She's been busting her butt working like 90+ hours every 2 weeks. I asked why she's killing herself and her answer is that we need money. That is true, but I dont want her working 90+ hours during her pay period! Well, I went to transfer some money into our savings account and noticed she took out $120. I have no problems with her spending money on meaningful things, but for her to pull it and give it to her mom to send to our native country is another thing!

She says she owes it to her grandmother to help pay for certain things. If you ask me, it's ALL BS. I realize we're better off but we have to worry about ourselves before we worry about someone else. She (her grandma) has other ppl to help out, why do they come asking my fiance for money. Mind you we have like $1800 in bills a month and you dont see other ppl offering to help, not that I want them to.

Anyways, I'm tired of this. We could use that extra money to help pay the car off. Mind you winter is around the corner and gas bill is going to be in the mid hundreds, not to mention gas for our car is ridiculous!!!!!!!!!! Belive me, I spoke with her regarding this many times but it doesnt work. I can't say anything since it's her family but she has to draw the line somewhere. Am I the one who's wrong?


why is her money your money?
 

EKKC

Diamond Member
May 31, 2005
5,895
0
0
Originally posted by: alkemyst
Originally posted by: lilcam
She's been busting her butt working like 90+ hours every 2 weeks. I asked why she's killing herself and her answer is that we need money. That is true, but I dont want her working 90+ hours during her pay period! Well, I went to transfer some money into our savings account and noticed she took out $120. I have no problems with her spending money on meaningful things, but for her to pull it and give it to her mom to send to our native country is another thing!

She says she owes it to her grandmother to help pay for certain things. If you ask me, it's ALL BS. I realize we're better off but we have to worry about ourselves before we worry about someone else. She (her grandma) has other ppl to help out, why do they come asking my fiance for money. Mind you we have like $1800 in bills a month and you dont see other ppl offering to help, not that I want them to.

Anyways, I'm tired of this. We could use that extra money to help pay the car off. Mind you winter is around the corner and gas bill is going to be in the mid hundreds, not to mention gas for our car is ridiculous!!!!!!!!!! Belive me, I spoke with her regarding this many times but it doesnt work. I can't say anything since it's her family but she has to draw the line somewhere. Am I the one who's wrong?


why is her money your money?


cuz he a gold digger!
 

Zombie

Platinum Member
Dec 8, 1999
2,359
1
71
Originally posted by: lilcam
She's been busting her butt working like 90+ hours every 2 weeks. I asked why she's killing herself and her answer is that we need money. That is true, but I dont want her working 90+ hours during her pay period! Well, I went to transfer some money into our savings account and noticed she took out $120. I have no problems with her spending money on meaningful things, but for her to pull it and give it to her mom to send to our native country is another thing!

She says she owes it to her grandmother to help pay for certain things. If you ask me, it's ALL BS. I realize we're better off but we have to worry about ourselves before we worry about someone else. She (her grandma) has other ppl to help out, why do they come asking my fiance for money. Mind you we have like $1800 in bills a month and you dont see other ppl offering to help, not that I want them to.

Anyways, I'm tired of this. We could use that extra money to help pay the car off. Mind you winter is around the corner and gas bill is going to be in the mid hundreds, not to mention gas for our car is ridiculous!!!!!!!!!! Belive me, I spoke with her regarding this many times but it doesnt work. I can't say anything since it's her family but she has to draw the line somewhere. Am I the one who's wrong?


Your fiance should dump you.
 

0roo0roo

No Lifer
Sep 21, 2002
64,795
84
91
maybe shes not ready to be devoted to anyone but her family back home. dump her. its no win.
 

cerebusPu

Diamond Member
May 27, 2000
4,008
0
0
she should dump your sorry a$$. you should be glad she works at all.

45 hours a week is NOT busting a nut..its working normal with 5 hours overtime. thats an extra hour a day.

sending $120 home is not a big deal at all. it means alot more to her and her family than it does to you. if you cant handle that than you are totally selfish.

ATOT should collectively rip you a new one.
 

crystal

Platinum Member
Nov 5, 1999
2,424
0
76
I only hope she realizes what a selfish & a control freak you are and dump your sorry a$$. BTW, I do hope you do dump her. You will be doing her a favor.