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I love being a tech-savvy parent >:D

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Make sure the government does not catch you tracking her like that. They don't like competition. 😛

On serious note, until she can afford to live on her own, your house your rules. I don't really see anything wrong with this. If she could be trusted to tell the truth you would not have to do that in first place and perhaps give her a bit more slack, but she lied.
 
Red Storm said:
When you do it secretly without them knowing, it's spying. When you tell them you can track them to make them paranoid and fearful but lie about how you actually do it, it's even more pathetic.
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Since when do kids have the right to know how their parents keep track of them? I'll take kids being "paranoid and fearful" of getting caught doing something wrong over kids demanding privacy to hide their activities. Kids don't need privacy, they need nurturing and mentoring. We're not talking about fully functioning adults with good decision making skills.

OK, let me revise my earlier statement: I don't care if you call it spying or not. Kids don't need privacy or trust until they've earned it. Your outrage over how the OP decided to keep track of his daughter is unwarranted.
 
sourceninja said:
Angry with kid because she told a lie, so you lie to her. That will build trust and respect.
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Good point, lol. I'm not a big fan of this tracking stuff...better to build a good, trusting relationship with your children and not rely on tracking their every movement. Children will lie...and you turned around and lied to her...not how you build a trusting relationship IMO. Besides, they can get in a world of trouble no matter where they are...does it matter that you know their exact location? Getting your children accustomed to being monitored at an early age...when they damn well should be concerned about their privacy and challenge intrusions to their privacy...you aren't helping in that matter whatsoever with the "I see you" thing......
 
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If you owned a store would you not install cameras? Would you not keep track of who handles the cash? It is trust but verify.
With kids you ARE responsible for what goes on. You try to teach them how to inter react with others but you need to KNOW what is going on, not what your kids or wife want you to think but the reality of situation. You gather intel and then decide how to proceed. If there are no great dangers on the horizon you let them do what they will but if storm clouds are in the distance it gives you time to be subtle and guide the errant individual into better choices.
 
TeeJay1952 said:
If you owned a store would you not install cameras? Would you not keep track of who handles the cash? It is trust but verify.
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There's no such thing as "trust but verify". Those are weasel words to get around what's really happening.

Store cameras would be prominently positioned, and signs would be put notifying of their use. I wouldn't surreptitiously film my customers or employees. I also wouldn't dance around the issue. The cameras are there because I DON'T trust anyone.
 
Paladin3 said:
Since when do kids have the right to know how their parents keep track of them? I'll take kids being "paranoid and fearful" of getting caught doing something wrong over kids demanding privacy to hide their activities. Kids don't need privacy, they need nurturing and mentoring. We're not talking about fully functioning adults with good decision making skills.

OK, let me revise my earlier statement: I don't care if you call it spying or not. Kids don't need privacy or trust until they've earned it. Your outrage over how the OP decided to keep track of his daughter is unwarranted.
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When you treat your kids that way, secretly spy on them not showing any level of trust, lying to them, not simply being open and communicating with them, then there should be absolutely no surprise when they return the favor (try to hide things, lie to you, don't communicate). It's as simple as that.
 
Red Storm said:
When you treat your kids that way, secretly spy on them not showing any level of trust, lying to them, not simply being open and communicating with them, then there should be absolutely no surprise when they return the favor (try to hide things, lie to you, don't communicate). It's as simple as that.
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In this case, she was hiding things and not communicating BEFORE she knew that her Dad was keeping tabs on her.

So your cause and effect argument doesn't hold up.
 
sixone said:
In this case, she was hiding things and not communicating BEFORE she knew that her Dad was keeping tabs on her.

So your cause and effect argument doesn't hold up.
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Because it only starts when they hit 16, the 15 years before that growing up and learning from their parents have no effect. 🙄
 
Red Storm said:
Because it only starts when they hit 16, the 15 years before that growing up and learning from their parents have no effect. 🙄
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Where did the OP say he was doing any of those things for the first fifteen years?

Kids need to know that they will get busted for breaking the rules. Maybe not every time, but maybe next time. It gives them incentive to think twice.
 
Red Storm said:
When you treat your kids that way, secretly spy on them not showing any level of trust, lying to them, not simply being open and communicating with them, then there should be absolutely no surprise when they return the favor (try to hide things, lie to you, don't communicate). It's as simple as that.
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Newsflash buddy, you can be as open and honest as you want and your kids will still hide shit from you. People need to stop trying to be their kid's friends and start being their god damn parents.
 
As a childless child I find the idea of the parent tracking the child through GPS very creepy. I wouldn't want that as a kid, I'd go out of my way to disable it or just not keep the phone with me. IMO, from this perspective, it would alienate me from my parents. We didn't have GPS in phones when I was growing up though, practically nobody even had a cell phone.

As a child who never really had severe consequences for anything, I feel the punishment could have been more severe.

If I were a parent, I would probably feel differently about the GPS though.
 
sixone said:
Where did the OP say he was doing any of those things for the first fifteen years?

Kids need to know that they will get busted for breaking the rules. Maybe not every time, but maybe next time. It gives them incentive to think twice.
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He didn't, and I never said he was doing it all these years. I said parenting is a long process, and treating them with respect and being open and communicative and not lying to them starts from the beginning, not at 16.

Kids definitely need to know that they get busted for breaking rules, but they also need to learn not do things because it's simply not good for them, not out of fear of their parents.

As an example, I didn't try drugs as a kid not because I was afraid my parents would find out, but rather they taught me why I shouldn't and so I avoided drugs because I knew they were bad, not out of a blind fear of my parents.

I also had very few issues with curfews and staying out because my parents have always been open with me and they treated me like an adult when I was a teen, and I returned that respect by giving them a heads up on where I was going, when I'd be back, etc.

It's not rocket science. Treat others the way you'd want to be treated, respect others if you want them to respect you, and be honest. When you act oppressive towards someone, don't be surprised when they rebel.
 
you shouldn't have to track her down, there should be mutual trust. and your punishment was not severe enough. staying past curfew is a no-no, and it should be appropriately punished especially considering she is driving around town doing who-knows-what.

also, phone tracking is stupid. if I were hungry for freedom and knew my parents were silly enough to rely on technology to track me, i'd leave them in the dust. pre-paid phone, call/text forwarding, and just leave my tagged cell phone in whatever place they think I am.
 
Red Storm said:
He didn't, and I never said he was doing it all these years. I said parenting is a long process, and treating them with respect and being open and communicative and not lying to them starts from the beginning, not at 16.
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Treating kids with respect and being open and communicative is not mutually exclusive with checking up on them AFTER they've shown an open disrespect for the rules.
 
Did you say curfew.

One thing is crystal clear. No matter what part of the world we are we protect our children.

I love kids very much even my nephew who just konkks everythig down. He has a very big place in my heart. 😀

I have no doubt he would have been drugged in New York. My sister lived there and I'm glad he is with me where nothing can harm him. 😀
 
sixone said:
Treating kids with respect and being open and communicative is not mutually exclusive with checking up on them AFTER they've shown an open disrespect for the rules.
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*Sigh* How many times does it need to be repeated? Checking up on your kids or keeping tabs on them is not the issue, secretly spying on them, lying to them to keep them paranoid, and then bragging about it on internet forums are all mutually exclusive from good parenting.
 
Red Storm said:
*Sigh* How many times does it need to be repeated? Checking up on your kids or keeping tabs on them is not the issue, secretly spying on them, lying to them to keep them paranoid, and then bragging about it on internet forums are all mutually exclusive from good parenting.
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What do you do with your teenage kids?
 
You know how like, 50-100 years ago, corporal punishment was a norm and now it's thought of as unnecessary and detrimental by a large population of parents? I suspect this will be the same way.

Advancements in electronics have given a lot of things that needed checks and balances, but I never thought about this angle, that it gives parents way too much information about their kids. I'm going to laugh when you thoroughly creep the hell out of your kids. Actually, it might be for the betterment of Government; maybe the future leaders of America (raised by you peepers) will decide to back off on all the personal stat tracking, who knows? But here's how the cycle goes as I see it:

Kids get punished physically > Whole generation of kids who think it is unneeded
kids get spied on incessantly > what exactly do you think is going to happen to the next gen?
 
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Red Storm said:
*Sigh* How many times does it need to be repeated? Checking up on your kids or keeping tabs on them is not the issue, secretly spying on them, lying to them to keep them paranoid, and then bragging about it on internet forums are all mutually exclusive from good parenting.
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Until you get it.

The OP wasn't trying to keep his kid paranoid. He's trying to keep her SAFE. That IS good parenting.
 
sixone said:
Until you get it.

The OP wasn't trying to keep his kid paranoid. He's trying to keep her SAFE. That IS good parenting.
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As someone who really doesn't have a problem with what the OP is doing, I have to follow along with Tweak and say to please stop sugar-coating everything.

Fritzo was like "I'm not lying". Yes you are.

And here you go saying its not keeping them paranoid. Yes he is. Keeping her safe and keeping her paranoid are not mutually exclusive. 🙄

It's really silly that you some of you guys really try to perpetuate that just because he may have done a *good* thing means that suddenly base words suddenly lose all meaning (lying and paranoia). These aren't abstract concepts. They are words with solid definitions and meanings, and some poster's desires to for some reason try to twist it just because they feel they are on the right side of justice is absurdity incarnate.
 
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