I have a potential issue in my family

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WHAMPOM

Diamond Member
Feb 28, 2006
7,628
183
106
In that situation, both are bigots.

Respect has to go both ways. You expect the uncle to respect his sons sexual preference, but you would not respect the uncles prejudice?

That is like the good china calling the kettle black.

More like it!
 

IEC

Elite Member
Super Moderator
Jun 10, 2004
14,600
6,084
136
I am disappointed ATOT. The correct answer is:

Hookers 'n blow
 

PowerEngineer

Diamond Member
Oct 22, 2001
3,602
781
136
But, but, but,,,.

Dealing with teenagers was, and still is, some of the worst times of my life.

This situation between parent and child is just that, its a special relationship. Society seems to treat family relationships as if the people just met on the street.

Regardless of what we think, the parent and child have to live with their decisions.

We (society) needs to keep its nose out of family relationships. If a mom wants to whip her kids ass for acting up in walmart, everyone else needs to mind their own business.

On the other hand, we should know the difference between abuse and discipline. A 15 year old young man gets in his dads face, the dad beats the kid down, it that disciple or abuse? I guess it depends on how you look at it.

If a dad whips his sons ass because the son is gay, that is between them. It is none of my business.

Given your take on parenting, your kids might also remember their teenage years as some of the worst times in their lives (and, yes, I do have teenage children).

Do you really think that parents are entitled to impose whatever physical punishment they see fit? Are "honor" killings okay? How about locking up the kids in cages? How about starving them? How many teeth would that child in WalMart need to lose before the mother's "ass whipping" became someone else's "business"?

Surely, you'll want to put some bounds on the reasons that a father can "whip his son's ass". Is have blue eyes enough of a reason? Maybe the kid is overweight? Didn't make the football team? Or maybe the father gets to do it just because it's fun?

Please clarify. :colbert:
 

ShawnD1

Lifer
May 24, 2003
15,987
2
81
Do you really think that parents are entitled to impose whatever physical punishment they see fit?
Absolutely. I'm going to forcibly put my penis inside of you and you'll respect me enough to not tell the police about it.


Who are you to decide how a parent should discipline their child?
What you're describing is often called torture. Beating someone until they deny reality and accept something that isn't true.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o_eSwq1ewsU

A similar concept was used in the book 1984. Beat someone until 2 + 2 = 5. Sometimes it equals 3. Sometimes it's both at the same time.
 

amicold

Platinum Member
Feb 7, 2005
2,656
1
81
I think this thread got blown way out of proportion. Too many posters assuming things, too much pc bullshit. The uncle is not going to beat the cousin, this is his way of dealing with fact his son is gay. His uncle feels he raised the child wrong despite knowing it's not a choice.Our society accepts homosexuality but that does not mean the uncle has to be joyful with his son's sexual preference. Any of you implying he should be would change tune if it were them...nobody wants a gay kid. That doesnt mean you can't love them, but we are programmed to procreate and you sure can't do that with two of a kind.
 

PliotronX

Diamond Member
Oct 17, 1999
8,883
107
106
Best thing to do is to not treat the son any differently and offer him an ear if he needs it. Monitor for abuse but don't ask him about it directly because he could punitively use an opportunity to get back at his parents. Your uncle has a right to be ashamed but if it does turn physical, or say they withhold food until he admits he likes the poon, your cousin should be put into a more accepting home.
 

T_Yamamoto

Lifer
Jul 6, 2011
15,007
795
126
Best thing to do is to not treat the son any differently and offer him an ear if he needs it. Monitor for abuse but don't ask him about it directly because he could punitively use an opportunity to get back at his parents. Your uncle has a right to be ashamed but if it does turn physical, or say they withhold food until he admits he likes the poon, your cousin should be put into a more accepting home.

+1
 

Dr. Zaus

Lifer
Oct 16, 2008
11,764
347
126
I think this thread got blown way out of proportion. Too many posters assuming things, too much pc bullshit. The uncle is not going to beat the cousin, this is his way of dealing with fact his son is gay. His uncle feels he raised the child wrong despite knowing it's not a choice.Our society accepts homosexuality but that does not mean the uncle has to be joyful with his son's sexual preference. Any of you implying he should be would change tune if it were them...nobody wants a gay kid. That doesnt mean you can't love them, but we are programmed to procreate and you sure can't do that with two of a kind.
Knowledge of our programming frees us from the deterministic nature of said programming.


Homosexual sex is just as much a choice as bigotry: there may be an in-born desire based on biology but there's also the knowledge of said influence that allows behavioral choice and at some point behavior influences our desire to the point that we change our perceptions.
 
Apr 12, 2010
10,510
10
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Now that he's out of the closet, it's safe for you to come out as well. Then you will have something in common with his son. Then you will feel more comfortable inviting him over for sleep overs & shit.
 

DCal430

Diamond Member
Feb 12, 2011
6,020
9
81
You should mind your own business. If he hits his son, then his son can call the police. Don't get involved in this.
 

sonicdrummer20

Senior member
Jul 2, 2008
474
0
0
I agree with your wife! Your uncle is throwing around ideas about physically assaulting his teenage son and you're laughing about it. That's just great... :mad:


The least you should have done was give him another point of view to consider. You could have observed that sexual orientation is not a choice for most people. You might have suggested that beatings (and faith-based "cures") are as unlikely to change his son's homosexuality as they are to change his hetrosexuality.

I think you should look for another opportunity (soon!) to confront your uncle on this topic and reverse the sense of tacit approval of his thoughts and ideas that you gave him by treating it as some sort of joke. If you don't, then you deserve to feel like manure if your uncle decides to put his thoughts into action.

:thumbsdown:


Yeah, from what i hear they make excellent home furnishing decorators. Seriously though being gay ain't okay.
 

sonicdrummer20

Senior member
Jul 2, 2008
474
0
0
I think this thread got blown way out of proportion. Too many posters assuming things, too much pc bullshit. The uncle is not going to beat the cousin, this is his way of dealing with fact his son is gay. His uncle feels he raised the child wrong.Our society glorifies homosexuality but that does not mean the uncle has to be joyful with his son's sexual preference. Any of you implying he should be would change their tune if it were them, nobody wants a gay kid. That doesnt mean you can't love them, but we are programmed to procreate and you sure can't do that with two of a kind.

FTFY
 

sonicdrummer20

Senior member
Jul 2, 2008
474
0
0
It is abnomal behaviour does not further the population and is one of the biggest reasons we have rampant STD's in today's culture.
 

Zargon

Lifer
Nov 3, 2009
12,218
2
76
It is abnomal behaviour does not further the population and is one of the biggest reasons we have rampant STD's in today's culture.



LOL


because straight people don't sleep around without protection?

have you ever been to college??

so ignorant.

beyond that, we are facing overpopulation, a little non-breeding would go a long way to help



texashikers opinions should be relegated to the history books, beating your 15 year old son because he is a gay is an OK opinion?

everyone is NOT entitled to their opinion, when its hateful and hurtful.

if that was true why wouldnt we still have slaves? SSDD.
 
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Dari

Lifer
Oct 25, 2002
17,133
38
91
The father mentioned in passing that his son watches Showtime a lot. After seeing shows like House of Lies and Shameless, I can see why he would be hostile. But I think I will put this on the backburner for now. I've known my uncle far longer than I've known my wife and I'm going to let him take care of this on his own. Besides, my uncle is 6'6", his son is 6'3" and I'm only 6'1" so there is no way I'm getting between them.
 

crashtestdummy

Platinum Member
Feb 18, 2010
2,893
0
0
It is abnomal behaviour does not further the population and is one of the biggest reasons we have rampant STD's in today's culture.

Really? You care to back that up with any real evidence? Even HIV, which had a reputation of being a "gay disease" came from eating bushmeat, and was spreading in Africa well before the first documented US cases.

Also, do you use contraception ever? Does that further the human population? Is increasing the human population even a good thing?
 

terry107

Senior member
Dec 8, 2005
891
0
0
The father mentioned in passing that his son watches Showtime a lot. After seeing shows like House of Lies and Shameless, I can see why he would be hostile. But I think I will put this on the backburner for now. I've known my uncle far longer than I've known my wife and I'm going to let him take care of this on his own. Besides, my uncle is 6'6", his son is 6'3" and I'm only 6'1" so there is no way I'm getting between them.

Are you very close to the son? The least you can do is talk to him privately and let him know that if he needs an outlet you can be there for him.
 

RearAdmiral

Platinum Member
Jun 24, 2004
2,280
135
106
that seems pretty fair.

being fat and gay is just terrible. your uncle should encourage his son to lose weight and start hitting the gym.

straight guys tend to have an easier time being fat, because they can still land a girl with the promise of being a good provider.

gay guys have no such line of appeal with other gay guys unless they're fiendishly wealthy and willing to be a sugar daddy.

Wow that's actually some interesting insight about the "providership".
 

waggy

No Lifer
Dec 14, 2000
68,143
10
81
The father mentioned in passing that his son watches Showtime a lot. After seeing shows like House of Lies and Shameless, I can see why he would be hostile. But I think I will put this on the backburner for now. I've known my uncle far longer than I've known my wife and I'm going to let him take care of this on his own. Besides, my uncle is 6'6", his son is 6'3" and I'm only 6'1" so there is no way I'm getting between them.

lol

/facepalm
 

sonicdrummer20

Senior member
Jul 2, 2008
474
0
0
So you admit that HIV is considered a "gay disease"? Can you prove that it came from eating "bushmeat"? Is homosexuality only a North American anomaly? Contraception is not a question here, it is marketed as birth-control however it still fails, life is still created on "accident".
 

Dari

Lifer
Oct 25, 2002
17,133
38
91
Are you very close to the son? The least you can do is talk to him privately and let him know that if he needs an outlet you can be there for him.

I had my wife take care of that. If he needs to talk to someone, he can talk to US, not me alone. I'm not an emotional person so it would be better if he heard from my wife and me.
 

crashtestdummy

Platinum Member
Feb 18, 2010
2,893
0
0
So you admit that HIV is considered a "gay disease"? Can you prove that it came from eating "bushmeat"? Is homosexuality only a North American anomaly? Contraception is not a question here, it is marketed as birth-control however it still fails, life is still created on "accident".

Wow. Just wow. I said "had a reputation", which is true. There was an awkward moment when Magic came out about having AIDS that he had to scream to the world that he wasn't gay.

Do I have "proof", as you say, that HIV came from bushmeat? Not in the sense that you want it, but it is the prevailing theory:

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC1088480

From there, it is thought to have spread predominantly though heterosexual sex involving women with other STDs (including syphilis, which ironically originated in the Americas and spread to Africa by way of Europeans raping both populations). When the first patients started showing up in America, it spread fastest among gay men because anal intercourse has a higher transmission rate than vaginal intercourse without the presence of ulcers.

All of this is besides the point, though. The burden of proof is not on me to demonstrate the origins of HIV, but rather it is on oyu to demonstrate how gay people are responsible for the spread of STDs. I could actually agree with an argument that non-monogamous sexual activity is the main spreader of STDs, but that's not what this discussion is about.
 

Dari

Lifer
Oct 25, 2002
17,133
38
91
Wow. Just wow. I said "had a reputation", which is true. There was an awkward moment when Magic came out about having AIDS that he had to scream to the world that he wasn't gay.

Do I have "proof", as you say, that HIV came from bushmeat? Not in the sense that you want it, but it is the prevailing theory:

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC1088480

From there, it is thought to have spread predominantly though heterosexual sex involving women with other STDs (including syphilis, which ironically originated in the Americas and spread to Africa by way of Europeans raping both populations). When the first patients started showing up in America, it spread fastest among gay men because anal intercourse has a higher transmission rate than vaginal intercourse without the presence of ulcers.

All of this is besides the point, though. The burden of proof is not on me to demonstrate the origins of HIV, but rather it is on oyu to demonstrate how gay people are responsible for the spread of STDs. I could actually agree with an argument that non-monogamous sexual activity is the main spreader of STDs, but that's not what this discussion is about.

It doesn't make sense. HIV is considered a new disease but Africans have been eating bushmeat since forever. If they've been eating it for tens of thousands of years then HIV should've been far more prevalent than it is today or even 100 years ago when people believe it came onto the scene.