I hate Walmart!!

JoLLyRoGer

Diamond Member
Aug 24, 2000
4,153
4
81
Edit: Cliffs for OCGuy
-I hate Black Friday and thought I was out of it scott free
-Walmart starting at 6pm Thanksgiving this year.
-Wife works Thurs. evening and guilted me into going for her.
-Now I'm pissed cause I can't enjoy Thanksgiving evening like a normal person does with the rest of my family.
-Fuck Walmart,... RAWR...RAGE....MORE RAGE.
-0/10, /thread, ....whatevuh
/Edit


Full Read
And not for the usual hipster reasons, nay, this is much more personal than that....
For many years now I have successfully avoided the melee and mayhem that is Black Friday Shopping.

My wife is the one who gets all caught up in the nonsense (and for reasons unknown, actually enjoys the experience) and tries year in and year out to drag me into it with her... I'd rather swallow razor blades dipped in cyanide than mix up in this stupidity of assholes trampling one another and fighting over a goddamn shopping cart all to save 50.00 on some Chinese piece of shit "whatever" that no one really wants or needs anyway.

Conveniently, my company is open the day after Thanksgiving and that's always been my shelter... my fail-safe.. "Sorry honey, can't do Black Friday with you, I'd love to be supportive and all but I gotta go to work. Can't get the day off, I already tried..." This is my standard alibi.

And now this... Walmart starting Black Friday at 1800hrs (6pm) Thanksgiving Day!! You FUCKERS!! So, my wife, being a nurse, and having to work tomorrow calls and this is the conversation

Her:
"I won't be off in time for the Black Friday deals at Walmar. I was wondering if you can you go?

Me:
"H-E-L-L NO!!"

Her: (saddened)
"Oh... ok... we just don't have a lot of money to spend this year and there were some really good deals on some things I wanted to get the kids."

Me: (Now feeling like an ass - as if I don't do this the kids won't have presents to open on Christmas)
"Ok, fine, I'll go and get some things... what is it you want me to pick up"

Her: (via text)
Sends texts me pictures of half the Black Friday ad clippings.

Me = FUCKED (and guilt tripped into mixing up in this circus - and I don't even like to shop!)

Goddamnit WALMART!! Fuck you for doing this!! Greedy-ass-rat-motherfucking-pig-fuckers. Couldn't just wait until Midnight like the rest America? NONONONONO!! You assholes had to set the table and raise the stakes so that I don't get to enjoy pigging out with the fam, watching a little football, and falling asleep on the couch... NO, I'll be out before the sun sets in a pissed off mood and wind up beating some trailer trash asshole with a wiffle ball bat from the toy isle over a $99.00 tablet (that would usually only be $120.00) and a $5.00 Barbie doll!!!

-FML
 
Last edited by a moderator:

OCGuy

Lifer
Jul 12, 2000
27,224
37
91
I will be honest, TLDR. But:


Edit: 3.5/10 rant


What store is it that is giving everyone who shows up within an hour the same price? I thought it was Walmart to avoid the stampeding deaths?
 
Last edited:
Oct 9, 1999
19,632
38
91
pussy controls you.

you're a good husband in your her eyes. that has to count for something, right?
 

PliotronX

Diamond Member
Oct 17, 1999
8,883
107
106
I can understand having to work on Black Thursday but forced to shop? Nuh uh.
 

rudeguy

Lifer
Dec 27, 2001
47,351
14
61
You are a good husband and a great dad. I take back three bad things I thought about you.


I'm actually thinking about going out tomorrow night. I won't have shit to do and Menards has some good deals on tools.
 

highland145

Lifer
Oct 12, 2009
43,973
6,338
136
Wife works Thurs. evening and guilted me into going for her.
So you should take the balls that she put in the mason jar under the sink and stick them back into your sack.


:biggrin:


Yeah, married life is like that some times. No way in hell I'd put up with that from one of my girlfriends.
 

ponyo

Lifer
Feb 14, 2002
19,688
2,811
126
I don't see any fault by Walmart here. The fault lies with your wife and your lack of money. Walmart is not forcing you to go. Your poor financial situation is. Walmart is actually helping you.
 

PliotronX

Diamond Member
Oct 17, 1999
8,883
107
106
You are a good husband and a great dad. I take back three bad things I thought about you.


I'm actually thinking about going out tomorrow night. I won't have shit to do and Menards has some good deals on tools.
Now that I read more than the cliffs I agree with you. Damn women know how to tug on our heartstrings.
 

PliotronX

Diamond Member
Oct 17, 1999
8,883
107
106
I don't see any fault by Walmart here. The fault lies with your wife and your lack of money. Walmart is not forcing you to go. Your poor financial situation is. Walmart is actually helping you.
They could really help if they went back to opening at 6am Friday. It's inching up every year. WTF kind of game are all the chains playing?
 

Perknose

Forum Director & Omnipotent Overlord
Forum Director
Oct 9, 1999
46,871
10,665
147
I understand the gist of your situation, but, for the future you need to hone up on your ferengi (deal-finding) skillz.

Niggardly shopper, please! Except for a few limited quantity doorbusters that will be gone by the time you climb over the spandex-clad fatties to get to them, what can Walmart possibly have that you can't get elsewhere?
 

AstroManLuca

Lifer
Jun 24, 2004
15,628
5
81
Why doesn't she just go to a different store that is closed on Thursday? Walmart is the worst store on the face of the planet on a normal day, I can only imagine how horrific it would be on Black Friday while trying to wade through a crowd of mouthbreathers.
 

lxskllr

No Lifer
Nov 30, 2004
60,050
10,539
126
Niggardly shopper, please! Except for a few limited quantity doorbusters that will be gone by the time you climb over the spandex-clad fatties to get to them, what can Walmart possibly have that you can't get elsewhere?

He looks like he's in pretty good shape judging by the pics thread. He might be able to beat the fatties in both speed and stamina. I'd go tonight and scout the layout. Draw a map to take with you, and beat everyone to the stuff.

Either that, or pay a little more, and call it a sanity tax. Go pawn something for a little extra money.
 

JoLLyRoGer

Diamond Member
Aug 24, 2000
4,153
4
81
Why doesn't she just go to a different store that is closed on Thursday? Walmart is the worst store on the face of the planet on a normal day, I can only imagine how horrific it would be on Black Friday while trying to wade through a crowd of mouthbreathers.

I really don't have a good answer for that...other than we live is a pretty small town and everything else is about an hour away from where we live.
 

dbk

Lifer
Apr 23, 2004
17,685
10
81
I was gonna go too.. for some sweatshirts and cheap fleece pants to run in. It's like $5 a piece. Do people normally just clean up on clothing items like that?
 

rudeguy

Lifer
Dec 27, 2001
47,351
14
61
I was gonna go too.. for some sweatshirts and cheap fleece pants to run in. It's like $5 a piece. Do people normally just clean up on clothing items like that?

How much are they normally?
 

ponyo

Lifer
Feb 14, 2002
19,688
2,811
126
I was gonna go too.. for some sweatshirts and cheap fleece pants to run in. It's like $5 a piece. Do people normally just clean up on clothing items like that?

How about Goodwill or thrift shops? It's probably like $1 there.
 

Perknose

Forum Director & Omnipotent Overlord
Forum Director
Oct 9, 1999
46,871
10,665
147
I hear one of their best deals is on a dual cassette boombox.

The other hot one is the Matlock boxed set on VHS.
 

rudeguy

Lifer
Dec 27, 2001
47,351
14
61
i just saw that they're $6 normally... $4 on BF.. oh what the hell?

HAHAHA

I thought it was something like $15 to $5 or something..

believe me...I've fell for the shit before.

They really know how to build "a sense of urgency" in their ads. Its a trick that it takes sales people years to master and they somehow do it in a 1" square ad.