How would you dispose of a body?

[us3rnotfound]

fvck it

 

[Excelsior]

Originally posted by: ShotgunSteve
Other. I live in Alaska, and there is a lot of land that is not accessible except by foot, and considering how huge the state is, that is impractical. So basically pull the teeth, paint the corpse brown and green to blend in with foliage from a distance, drop it out of a small plane out in the middle of a heavily wooded area far from a populated area, and let Mother Nature do the rest.

Excellent idea. However, I think the only issues with this one and the boat 20 miles off the coast idea, is who is gonna fly you? If you have your own plane, sure, but youd have to take off without others knowing, of having a good reason...same with the boat.

 

[Ketteringo]

I live in Michigan, so I would take a vacation to the UP and just bury it up there.

 

[BigToque]

I suppose if you could gain access to a crematory, that would be the easiest way to get rid of the body. Then you just spread out the ashes in some wooded area (not all in one place though. Just sprinkle it randomly.)

 

[ajpa123]

One night, when everybody in the world is sleepin', I would build a wooden bridge to the moon and dump the body in the Sea of Tranquility and then i would dismantle the bridge before daybreak!

Shhhhh ! Don't tell noone my idea, k people

 

[BadNewsBears]

Construct a giant cauldron and fill with some insane acid, just completely destroy it, then dispose of acid, dissasemble cauldron and your done, say you were acid washing some stone or something.

 

[Chiboy]

You want to know? Look this is hard but a real way to do it is put it in the lava, If you can do it & keep your mouths shut, you're home free.

 

[RU482]

Iowa has lots and lots of large corn fields with dirt paths leading to them :evil:

 

[Turkish]

Just go to bed and stop drinking.


seriously. lol.

 

[Orsorum]

Originally posted by: Munchies
Construct a giant cauldron and fill with some insane acid, just completely destroy it, then dispose of acid, dissasemble cauldron and your done, say you were acid washing some stone or something.

Be careful now. Might end up like the Joker.

 

[NikPreviousAcct]

1) remove jaw/teeth
2) grind jaw/teeth into dust
3) wrap body in fishing net designed for small fish
4) afix cement blocks to net
5) drop body into deep water

 

[slpaulson]

Bury it in my back yard.
It's just ten acres of woods in the middle of nowhere Wisconsin.

 

[MoPHo]

On HBO a lil bit back there was a documentary on this guy nicknamed the 'Ice Man'. He was nicknamed it because of his lack of feelings towards everyone, not for the particular way he disposed of the body im going to mention.

I believe he killed this person and put the entire body in a freezer for roughly two years. He then dumped the body in a forest and when the authorities found the body and brought it to a forensic expert, the expert opened the body only to discover that the body was full of ice.

There was nothing the expert could do because if he melted the ice, the body would wear down due to water effects and i believe he couldn't keep it frozen. Therefore, the time of death was impossible to tell. However, they did ID the body, but if you're looking to possibly try and get away with murder, go for it.

 

[daveymark]

Grind the parts up, then mix them with your manure. Start a lawn and garden business focusing on fertilization.

 

[rh71]

Full moon tonight eh ?

First things first... how would you transport it in the first place ? Rolled up carpet ?

 

[CombatChuk]

Originally posted by: iamme
pigs.

hehehe Snatch was an awesome movie...

 

[Shockwave]

Originally posted by: OrganizedChaos

Originally posted by: Shockwave
You cant burn a body (Not very well anyways)

I'd just feed it to my wife. She usually prefers live victims, but freshly dead is ok too. Sometimes (rarely) its nice to be married to a demoness.

yes you can. wrap it in a blanket and use an accelerent. once the fire is hot enough to liquify the fat it will be absorbed into the blanket and burned. once the fat catches the ress will melt quickly and will burn very hot for a long time. see: nazi fire pits. by wrapping the body in a blanket you can use something known as the wick effect to your advantage.

I said "Not very well"
It isnt like you just start a campfire and tossd a body on there, it takes a damned hot fire to burn a corpse. Have YOU ever tried it? You rlittle get a blanket and a match theory does NOT work.

 

[nietsni3]

i saw on the news once: a 36 year old man from Arizona flew to ... (i forgot) to meet his internet soulmate for the first time. he came over her place just to realize that she was a 69 year old hag who kept her roommate's corpse in the freezer in the basement. i wonder what happened after that

 

[NikPreviousAcct]

Originally posted by: Shockwave

Originally posted by: OrganizedChaos

Originally posted by: Shockwave
You cant burn a body (Not very well anyways)

I'd just feed it to my wife. She usually prefers live victims, but freshly dead is ok too. Sometimes (rarely) its nice to be married to a demoness.

yes you can. wrap it in a blanket and use an accelerent. once the fire is hot enough to liquify the fat it will be absorbed into the blanket and burned. once the fat catches the ress will melt quickly and will burn very hot for a long time. see: nazi fire pits. by wrapping the body in a blanket you can use something known as the wick effect to your advantage.

I said "Not very well"
It isnt like you just start a campfire and tossd a body on there, it takes a damned hot fire to burn a corpse. Have YOU ever tried it? You rlittle get a blanket and a match theory does NOT work.

The body will burn at a LOW temperature for a long time. That's the only way to burn bones. When someone is cremated, their bones do not burn up in 1500 degrees of heat. Bones are ground down into powder and added to the rest of the ashes.

The only way to burn bone is to wrap it in a blanket and light it on fire. Fat will keep the bones burning at a low temp and eventually burn them to dust.

 

[OrganizedChaos]

Originally posted by: Nik

Originally posted by: Shockwave

Originally posted by: OrganizedChaos

Originally posted by: Shockwave
You cant burn a body (Not very well anyways)

I'd just feed it to my wife. She usually prefers live victims, but freshly dead is ok too. Sometimes (rarely) its nice to be married to a demoness.

yes you can. wrap it in a blanket and use an accelerent. once the fire is hot enough to liquify the fat it will be absorbed into the blanket and burned. once the fat catches the ress will melt quickly and will burn very hot for a long time. see: nazi fire pits. by wrapping the body in a blanket you can use something known as the wick effect to your advantage.

I said "Not very well"
It isnt like you just start a campfire and tossd a body on there, it takes a damned hot fire to burn a corpse. Have YOU ever tried it? You rlittle get a blanket and a match theory does NOT work.

The body will burn at a LOW temperature for a long time. That's the only way to burn bones. When someone is cremated, their bones do not burn up in 1500 degrees of heat. Bones are ground down into powder and added to the rest of the ashes.

The only way to burn bone is to wrap it in a blanket and light it on fire. Fat will keep the bones burning at a low temp and eventually burn them to dust.

yup your right its a low temp fire, my bad


http://www.fact-index.com/s/sp/spontaneous_human_combustion.html#The%20'Wick'%20Effect


saw this on TV, was cool to watch

 

[FleshLight]

1. Take bodies in trash truck to soylent green plant
2. put bodies on conveyor belt leading to huge soylent green mixing vat
3. distribute soylent green to starving 3rd world kids

I WINNAR!

 

[nan0bug]

Originally posted by: iamme
pigs.

 

[fredtam]

Marshes of coastal SC. It works great.

 

[Nitemare]

Dump it on my neighbors yard and act surprised when he mentions finding a body in his yard over a cup of coffee the following morning

 

[BigBirdBuggy]

what about uhaul?
its storage...isn't it?


i was thinking more along the lines of cutting teh body up, feeding it to a dog, cut that up, feed it to a cat, cut that up, and then have a saturday bbq with all your neighbors.

and for an extra kick...cut them up too...