How do you talk to girls, without seeming desperate?

ElFenix · Mar 19, 2004

Originally posted by: hdeck
ok here's what you do. get completely drunk at a party with lots of girls. you will be talking in NO time at all.

<3:beer:

sweet sweet beer

TechnoKid · Mar 19, 2004

you won't always get what you want.

hdeck · Mar 19, 2004

you'd be suprised how many of those "nice Christian girls" drink in private.

dirtboy · Mar 19, 2004

Originally posted by: gjeste

Originally posted by: dirtboy
Talk to them as if you don't care if they like you or want to go out with you. That way, if they turn you down... you don't care!

Click to expand...

problem. how can I act like I don't care, if I am already going out of my way to talk to them, persay? can you do both of those things at once. go out of your way to talk to them, while still convincing them that you dont care?

Look, I don't care one way or another if you ever have a girlfriend, but I still reply to your post. See what I'm saying?

Sure you can go out of your way to talk to someone. What's the worse that can happen? They turn you down and you are still single. Oh darn. The key is to stop caring. It may be hard, but you don't have to go talking to a girl just because you want to date her. Just talk to her.

You don't act differently. Not caring is not an act, it's how much you get consumed about what you are attempting to do. If you chat up a girl with the mind set that nothing is going to happen and you're not going to care if nothing happens, then you aren't setting yourself up for failure. You just talk to her over and over and if if nothing happens, that's that.

Again, you don't convince them you don't care, you convince YOU that you don't care.

xSkyDrAx · Mar 19, 2004

Be casual, not desperate. Talk to her in a more 'want to be friends' than 'want to be couples' kind of way. If they like you, you'll know, if they don't you'll know and you won't have to look like a fool(at least to other people)

CrackaLackaZe · Mar 19, 2004

So, why did skywalker66 make a new acct?

dirtboy · Mar 19, 2004

Originally posted by: gjeste

hmmm, i like this idea, so by not caring as much, I can still do the same things, and yet either be more successful (because girls will be attracted to my not caring) or even if I do fail, it wont affect me as much.
This is what you are trying to say, I take it?

Pretty much, but you shouldn't come off as arrogant, more like indifferent. Some girls like guys that don't care, others don't. For me, it's more of a mental mindstate instead of an action.

You'll only be successful because you might approach more women. And not get hung up on them and seem desperate like you do/have. And like you said, if you fail, it won't really matter, because you don't care.

Strike up a conversation with them, ask them to do something with you some time and if they turn you down, forget about it.

TechnoKid · Mar 19, 2004

Originally posted by: gjeste

Originally posted by: xSkyDrAx
Be casual, not desperate. Talk to her in a more 'want to be friends' than 'want to be couples' kind of way. If they like you, you'll know, if they don't you'll know and you won't have to look like a fool(at least to other people)

Click to expand...

is it possible to be casual while still trying just as hard? cuz if so, that is good, cuz i still have control over the situation.

okay, i do want to be friends with girls first, and that does come first and foremost,
but lets be honest, If I'm with an attractive and nice woman, I'm definately thinking about the possibility of whether or not she may make a good girlfriend.
So.. Thus she is added onto my prospects list, and I want to learn more about her to see if she would make a good girlfriend.

you can't have complete control; the girl will aslo want control of the relationship between you two. this control should be mutual. you should have control over youself (don't make irreversible mistakes) more so than the actual situation between you and the girl.

dirtboy · Mar 19, 2004

Originally posted by: gjeste

Originally posted by: xSkyDrAx
Be casual, not desperate. Talk to her in a more 'want to be friends' than 'want to be couples' kind of way. If they like you, you'll know, if they don't you'll know and you won't have to look like a fool(at least to other people)

Click to expand...

is it possible to be casual while still trying just as hard? cuz if so, that is good, cuz i still have control over the situation.

okay, i do want to be friends with girls first, and that does come first and foremost,
but lets be honest, If I'm with an attractive and nice woman, I'm definately thinking about the possibility of whether or not she may make a good girlfriend.
So.. Thus she is added onto my prospects list, and I want to learn more about her to see if she would make a good girlfriend.

Yes is possible to be casual, but you can't be in control of a situation that doesn't warrant control.

I think all men think about what kind of future they want with an attractive woman. I'd say that's normal. The key is not to let yourself get out of control and become obsessive before things develop.

bootymac · Mar 19, 2004

Originally posted by: hdeck
ok here's what you do. get completely drunk at a party with lots of girls. you will be talking in NO time at all.

<3:beer:

I can picture it in my head already...
[drunk] SO ONE TIME, I WAS FIXING A COMPUTER FOR MY STAR TREK BUDDY, AND I TOOK A SCREENSHOT OF HIS DESKTOP AND SET IT AS HIS WALL PAPER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! [/dunk]

MAME · Mar 19, 2004

skywalker, is that you?

if so, fvck you!

Rumpltzer · Mar 19, 2004

if you're not american born asian (if you look western), go overseas and teach english... you'll meet hot asian chicks and you'll be treated like movie star

Svnla · Mar 19, 2004

Let see here are a few sugestions: 1) Don't "act cool", don't "try to be a player"; 2) Think with your upper head and not the lower one, enought said; 3) Talk to her as a person, a potential friend and not someone you going to score; 4)Talk about something you have in common or wait for the right opportunity. Don't just walk up to her and start babbling about some nonsenses; 5)Don't be nervous, don't snore, take a shower, comb your hair or get a hair cut. In other word, get yourself presentable.

Last but not least, just be yourself and let things go as they suppose to be. DO NOT try too hard or you will seem as some desperate losers. Women hate guys without confidence and use the pity/sympathy card.

Now go get them, my little grasshopper. LOL.

Mar 19, 2004

Heeey there. Pissed off any cops lately?

nageov3t · Mar 19, 2004

it's 110% about self confidence.

one of my friends is an ugly mofo with an annoying personality... but he is also the most confident guy I know, and has never had a problem finding a girlfriend.

if you can realize how much you rock as a person and project that realization into your attitude on life, other people will realize it too.

MainFramed · Mar 19, 2004

Originally posted by: jumpr
Heeey there. Pissed off any cops lately?

\whips out hand cuffs

Pissed off cops? What

Jzero · Mar 19, 2004

You are skywalker66 and I have proof:

I dont drink, and I really dont want a girl who does (and at the college I go to right now, a private Christian college, my guess would be that a good 80% of the girls here dont drink period.

Cripes, you could at least change your freakin' story a little bit if you're gonna troll like this. Make it at least a LITTLE challenging...

Old post from the perp...

oh btw,

note: this is a christian college so alcohol is not permitted, so that does change the social atmosphere a bit. not as many big parties, more so you get to know ppl thru regular fun activities.

SagaLore · Mar 19, 2004

For starters, if you're asking this here then you are desperate no matter how you talk to them.

So why don't you just forget about the girls for now, and wait until you've matured enough that talking to a girl is just like talking to any other human being.

loup garou · Mar 19, 2004

Originally posted by: Jzero
You are skywalker66 and I have proof:

I dont drink, and I really dont want a girl who does (and at the college I go to right now, a private Christian college, my guess would be that a good 80% of the girls here dont drink period.

Click to expand...

Cripes, you could at least change your freakin' story a little bit if you're gonna troll like this. Make it at least a LITTLE challenging...

Old post from the perp...

oh btw,

note: this is a christian college so alcohol is not permitted, so that does change the social atmosphere a bit. not as many big parties, more so you get to know ppl thru regular fun activities.

Click to expand...

haha...I was just going to mention that. pwned.

slackerinabox · Mar 19, 2004

Easiest way to talk to a girl: pretend that she's a guy first.. Then be the wittiest you've ever been in your life, say the more charming things that you possibly can say, and flatter her - but don't over do it... It has to seem natural and a part of your being.. My threads out there show that I'm a whiney, annoying guy right now-DON'T TRY TO USE PITY TO GET ON THEIR GOOD SIDES... I recently got dump so i'm naturally pathetic right now and girls are far less interested in me (duh)... the trick is to be sure of yourself and to let them know that you're passionate about something and genuinely interesting... Ask yourself: would you like to be with yourself? If the answer is no then fix yourself up for your own sake and then hit the singles clubs

How do you talk to girls, without seeming desperate?

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