How do YOU like to hide bodies

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LordMorpheus

Diamond Member
Aug 14, 2002
6,871
1
0
Originally posted by: MacBaine
ok, hypothetical scenario. you find a body in your house. forget the details of how it got there. no acid, woodchipper's cost $75 to rent. what would YOU do?
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call the fscking cops, man. I don't want to get in deep sh!t, and its better just to come clean, answer some questions, than to try to explain why you woodchippered the body and buried the peices in scattered locations to an officer whos beating the crap out of you 'cause you are a sh1tface.


And if I did, for some unexplained reason, need to get rid of the body, I would not use the trunk of my sable. See, when its in direct sunlight and the temps over 92 degress fh, my trunk spontaneosly pops open.

Instead, I would rent a car under an assumed name, after doing something to make me look of a racial minority (you know how cops are . . I would paint my face to look like an Arab, die my hair black, and put on a fake black mustach . . . ) put the body in THAT trunk, take it to a junkyard, and offer the man a large amount of money to put it into his car crusher without looking at it first . . . I would also wear gloves or some such so as not to leave a trail. Then, I sneak home (so no one sees my disguise) clean up, and live scot free, save for the fiery vengence of the Lord that may or may not be waiting to strike me down (depending on whether he exists and what mood he is in)
 
0roo0roo

0roo0roo

No Lifer
Sep 21, 2002
64,795
84
91
cut into small pieces. boil each piece until the bones are easily extracted. bake bones until brittle and completely dry. crush and grind bones into powder. dispose. burry rest. or toss it into the ocean after pureeing it in a big food processor. burn hair. very long and hard to do i guess.
 
Vonkhan

Vonkhan

Diamond Member
Feb 27, 2003
8,198
0
71
Originally posted by: wfbberzerker
You're always gonna have problems lifting a body in one piece. Apparently the best thing to do is cut up a corpse into six pieces and pile it all together. And when you got your six pieces, you gotta get rid of them, because it's no good leaving it in the deep freeze for your mum to discover, now is it? Then I hear the best thing to do is feed them to pigs. You got to starve the pigs for a few days, then the sight of a chopped-up body will look like curry to a pisshead. You gotta shave the heads of your victims, and pull the teeth out for the sake of the piggies' digestion. You could do this afterwards, of course, but you don't want to go sievin' through pig sh!t, now do you? They will go through bone like butter. You need at least sixteen pigs to finish the job in one sitting, so be wary of any man who keeps a pig farm. They will go through a body that weighs 200 pounds in about eight minutes. That means that a single pig can consume two pounds of uncooked flesh every minute.
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Atleast give credit where its due, u shameless sh!te :p

The above is a dialouge by Bricktop from the movie "SNATCH" directed by Guy Ritchie, starring Brad Pitt

If u haven't seen it ... u gotta!
 
0roo0roo

0roo0roo

No Lifer
Sep 21, 2002
64,795
84
91
yea i was like wtf when i read that too. theres a bit on pigs in the 2nd hanibal lecter movie too.
 
W

wfbberzerker

Lifer
Apr 12, 2001
10,423
0
0
Originally posted by: Vonkhan
Originally posted by: wfbberzerker
You're always gonna have problems lifting a body in one piece. Apparently the best thing to do is cut up a corpse into six pieces and pile it all together. And when you got your six pieces, you gotta get rid of them, because it's no good leaving it in the deep freeze for your mum to discover, now is it? Then I hear the best thing to do is feed them to pigs. You got to starve the pigs for a few days, then the sight of a chopped-up body will look like curry to a pisshead. You gotta shave the heads of your victims, and pull the teeth out for the sake of the piggies' digestion. You could do this afterwards, of course, but you don't want to go sievin' through pig sh!t, now do you? They will go through bone like butter. You need at least sixteen pigs to finish the job in one sitting, so be wary of any man who keeps a pig farm. They will go through a body that weighs 200 pounds in about eight minutes. That means that a single pig can consume two pounds of uncooked flesh every minute.
Click to expand...




Atleast give credit where its due, u shameless sh!te :p

The above is a dialouge by Bricktop from the movie "SNATCH" directed by Guy Ritchie, starring Brad Pitt

If u haven't seen it ... u gotta!
Click to expand...

ya ya ya... i uh, forgot to credit them...
rolleye.gif
:D
 
Y

yellowperil

Diamond Member
Jan 17, 2000
4,598
0
0
Well, in Grosse Pointe Blank they put the guy in the furnace, which I thought was a pretty good move. One thing's for sure, if you hit a homeless guy and he ends up in your windshield, and you end up dumping his body in the park, don't put your car back in the garage.
 
H

huey1124

Golden Member
Sep 19, 2000
1,068
1
0

go fishing at Berkeley Marina on Christmas Eve, tie the body to a cement block, and dump the body in the bay. make sure to sell the victim's Range Rover when you're done.


 
T

TheHeartless

Senior member
May 27, 2003
890
0
0
in the dumpster behind the el gato village..... it smells really bad over there....must be those nob hill works.
 
M

MacBaine

Banned
Aug 23, 2001
9,999
0
0
Ok... NOT THAT I DID, but IF I were to have a body in my house, I WOULD have just loaded him into the back of my neighbor's pickup before he left for Colorado. NOT THAT I DID, but that's what I WOULD have done.
 
G

GermyBoy

Banned
Jun 5, 2001
3,524
0
0
Feed it to pigs. Then, take the bones and run them through the woodchipper and dump them in a lake.
 
J

JarJarBinks77

Member
Jun 15, 2003
27
0
0
Originally posted by: wfbberzerker
You're always gonna have problems lifting a body in one piece. Apparently the best thing to do is cut up a corpse into six pieces and pile it all together. And when you got your six pieces, you gotta get rid of them, because it's no good leaving it in the deep freeze for your mum to discover, now is it? Then I hear the best thing to do is feed them to pigs. You got to starve the pigs for a few days, then the sight of a chopped-up body will look like curry to a pisshead. You gotta shave the heads of your victims, and pull the teeth out for the sake of the piggies' digestion. You could do this afterwards, of course, but you don't want to go sievin' through pig sh!t, now do you? They will go through bone like butter. You need at least sixteen pigs to finish the job in one sitting, so be wary of any man who keeps a pig farm. They will go through a body that weighs 200 pounds in about eight minutes. That means that a single pig can consume two pounds of uncooked flesh every minute.
Click to expand...

Somebody saw the movie Snatch (i though it was a good movie to)

Edit! - Should finish reading long a$$ threads before i post... grrr
 
Z

z0mb13

Lifer
May 19, 2002
18,106
1
76
Originally posted by: JarJarBinks77
Originally posted by: wfbberzerker
You're always gonna have problems lifting a body in one piece. Apparently the best thing to do is cut up a corpse into six pieces and pile it all together. And when you got your six pieces, you gotta get rid of them, because it's no good leaving it in the deep freeze for your mum to discover, now is it? Then I hear the best thing to do is feed them to pigs. You got to starve the pigs for a few days, then the sight of a chopped-up body will look like curry to a pisshead. You gotta shave the heads of your victims, and pull the teeth out for the sake of the piggies' digestion. You could do this afterwards, of course, but you don't want to go sievin' through pig sh!t, now do you? They will go through bone like butter. You need at least sixteen pigs to finish the job in one sitting, so be wary of any man who keeps a pig farm. They will go through a body that weighs 200 pounds in about eight minutes. That means that a single pig can consume two pounds of uncooked flesh every minute.
Click to expand...

Somebody saw the movie Snatch (i though it was a good movie to)

Edit! - Should finish reading long a$$ threads before i post... grrr
Click to expand...

I just watched this movie too!!! nice one

 
Y

yakko

Lifer
Apr 18, 2000
25,455
2
0
Originally posted by: ausm
Originally posted by: guyver01
woodchipper

or lake
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Damn it you took my idea !!


Ausm
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Actually woodchipper and a boat in salt water. Dispose of the body in one location a few miles out and throw the woodchipper overboard. Cruise to within about a mile of shore and sink the boat. Get in your life raft that you inflated, anchored and left behind before you started the woodchipper so that it is free from DNA evidence and cruise back in. Cry hysterically over the loss of your friends/loved ones or whoever it is that you just fed the fishies with.
 
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