joshdoe...
there have been others before you who have posted questions on this topic, without much, if any, success. Myself included. The huge problem is that it's next to impossible to find the IR adapter to plug into your MB IrDA header... it baffles me that most mobo manufacturers continue to include the header yet are completely worthless when it comes to providing the adapter to hook up to it.
Assuming you are able to find the adapter, all you have to do is plug it into the header and enable IrDA in your BIOS. The next time you boot into Windows it should detect your IrDA port and install the driver. There will be an infrared control panel and tray icon to monitor any connections.
It's real simple after you find the adapter, but finding the adapter is the hard part by far. I would suggest trying to talk to Abit, although you probably won't have much success... Abit is worthless when it comes to this stuff.
If you do have some luck with Abit, pls let the rest of us know. There are more than a few of us who wish to enable this feature.
Good luck in your quest.
l2c